Chapter 4 - is yours

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Previously on Wicked in Love...

"Name's Rick. And I should warn you now."

My heart fell in my stomach. Had I been fooled again and now he wanted money after all?

"What?"

"I talk a lot."

I felt my shoulders relaxed. "I don't."

"Sounds like we're gonna make a good team." He shot me a grin, offered his hand. His eyes were as clear and bright as honesty.

He looked, I thought, like a man with integrity. There was fire in his eyes, but the good kind. The one where you know you were talking to someone who'd been pushed around before and had learned to fight back. And I realized I wanted to see that in my eyes too.

I took his hand, let him help me get up.

"Yeah." I smiled back.

***

Cameron

A sudden movement in my periphery brought me back from my past to the present.

A neon green ball shot in the air, followed by a rolling brown blur on the ground, then the familiar sound of Rick's gravelly laugh.

I froze, turned. My chest felt full at the sight of him. He was once a stranger who had shown a very angry kid a kindness he never knew existed before.  A stranger who made me feel, for the first time in my life, what it was like to have a father.

I pushed his limits, but he never gave up on me. Not even once. Not even when I deserved it. 

I watched as a giant, clumsy dog—the brown blur—tried to sniff its way to the ball hiding in the grass, tripped on its own paws. It got up like nothing happened, then hopped in bliss toward Rick, tongue lolling out. Without the ball.

"You're supposed to bring it back to me. It's too far away, huh?" Rick asked the dog conversationally. There was a white stick in his mouth, probably a lollipop. Was he smoking again? "That's okay. I wouldn't get it either."

The dog let out a loud, happy bark, plopped on its back, exposing its belly. Rick hunkered down, made the dog happy by giving it a belly rub. "You're hopeless. How about a snack?"

"I'll take a coffee," I called out. "If you have some."

He froze for a moment, then a slow grin spread on his face before he looked up and met my gaze.

"Cameron?" Rick rose, laughing, eyes shining with joy. The candy fell from his mouth. "Come here, son. Come here now."

He met me halfway, pulled me in a tight embrace. "My boy's back," he said gruffly. "Welcome home, kid."

I wanted to say thank you, but my throat felt thick with emotion. I hadn't seen him in a while and being around him brought comfort that nearly overwhelmed me. I hugged him back. 

Not all familiar things lie after all.

"So?" He pulled me away, eyes scanning my face. His grin was from ear to ear. "Did you decide to be a mountain man? Hell of a beard you got there."

I cleared my throat, rubbed my jaw. "I was planning on shaving it."

"Do it soon before birds start nesting in it."

"Speak for yourself. Sir."

Tall and slim as a bamboo, with limbs as hard as rock, Rick swung his arm around my shoulders. And I was surprised how strong he seemed, despite the news I received. His hair, more silver than blond, was usually swept back from his face. It fell on his forehead and shoulders now and needed a good brush. His beard, usually kept neat and trimmed, looked like a forest.

"Well, what can I say? I am the mountain man. I'm a myth."

The dog barked like mad around my feet.

"You got a dog?" I crouched down, offered my hand to it palm up. I waited. It sniffed my hand, then licked it. I scratched under its chin. It rested its head on my knee.

"My sisters got him from the shelter, left him on my doorstep a couple of days ago," he answered, looking at the dog with affection. "They said since no woman in their right mind would have me, I should at least have a dog to keep me company."

He was being modest. Rick was in his early fifties, successful and good-looking. He was always courteous to women, flirty even. But for as long as I could remember he hadn't dated anyone seriously. Not that I was aware of anyway.

I heard when he was younger, he dated women that weren't exactly good for him. One of them nearly bankrupted him, the other cheated on him. One thing for sure, he liked beautiful women—the ones he could save but destroy him. Maybe that was why he stayed away from them now.

"His name's Jon Bon. Let's go inside." He gestured at the house. "Get some food in you. You hungry?"

My stomach growled in response. The thought of food made me queasy when I woke up but sounded appealing now.

"Yeah. Food sounds good."

"Alright. Hold on." He backtracked, frowning and squinting at the ground "Aha!" Bent and picked up his lollipop. Wiped it on his pants, blew on it. Then stuck it in his mouth.

I just shook my head.

"So," Rick started as soon as we entered his kitchen. He filled Jon Bon's bowl with kibble, placed it beside his water bowl. The dog plopped down on the floor and happily ate. "When did you arrive in town?"

He opened the fridge, pulled out a pack of steak. He looked just as he always did. Strong and dependable, tough. But I noticed his face was a little swollen, his eyes a little sunken, and his movements slower.

"As soon as I heard from Elijah."

He stopped in his tracks. Carefully he placed the pack on the counter, rested his palms on the countertop and hung his head.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked quietly.

He sighed. There was a sound of exhaustion in it. When he looked up, he had a smile on his face. But it was strained.

"I was hoping I'd be wearing a tombstone when you come back. Am I pissing you off?"

"Yeah," I said. "That's not fair."

"What do you mean fair? Fair to you? Fair to me? Fair to that dog? Life's not fair to anybody. You should know this."

"You should have called me."

"I'm just... tired. I've been carrying my cross up the hill for a long time now. I just need to rest for a bit."

I had never seen him like this before. He was always ready to tackle the world, tireless and eager. Watching him go through this twisted something inside me. "Let me carry it for you until you're ready."

"Alright, kid. Alright."

"So, what did the doctor say?"

"Nothing much. Kidneys are working at ten percent. Doctor said I can continue living my life normally. It's dialysis. I go three times a week, four hours each visit. I'm good."

Ten percent.

"I'll drive you to your treatments," I said.

"No."

"Don't be stubborn. I—"

The dog shuffled from his position, leaving its food bowl to go to Rick. It whined, rubbing its nose against Rick's pants. Rick scratched its head.

"I'll be there," I said.

His mouth twitched into a smile. "You gonna stick around this time?"

I met his gaze. "I'm gonna stick around."

"Alright," he said. "Alright, kid."

It was evening by the time Rick told me he wanted peace and quiet and that I should get back to my own devices. I just hopped in my truck when my phone chirped a text.

Lockhart: South Gym at 1800. Coach said bring your butt ugly face to practice.

Another chirp.

Lockhart: Levi added you back in the group chat. Don't leave this time. Check it now

I sighed. "Do I have to?"

I downloaded an app, logged in, checked the basketball team group chat.

ANNOUNCEMENT: Ladies! Bring your birthday suits or that two piece your mom bought you. Adam's Bridge. Tomorrow night.

Adam's Bridge was close to the milkshake bar. Which was close to the traffic lights. Which was close to her. Would she be there?

So what if she's there? What are you gonna do about it?

I started my truck and headed to practice.

*

It had been a while since I played ball, but it didn't take long until I found my rhythm. It was good to see the guys again. Caleb must have said something to them, because other than a talk with Coach before practice, no one in the team bothered me why I took off almost a year ago or where I'd been. Well, almost no one.

"Hey Saint Laurent," Justin shouted from behind me. "Why'd you run off like that? Got some chick pregnant or what?" He guffawed.

"Yeah," I said. "Your mom."

I watched as Caleb took his second shot, missed again. He was off his game tonight which rarely ever happened. The thing that I envied about him was his ability to not take a lot of things seriously. Problems seemed to bounce off him, and if one of them tripped him over, he'd just dust himself off and jump back again. With a damn smile.

This time though something was different.

Rolling my shoulders, I backed up, elbowed Justin in the ribs, heard his what the fuck! then caught a pass from Levi, took my shot, scored.

Levi tapped me in the back. "Glad to have you back, son!"

It was good to focus on something else. It made me forget about the visit with Rick that had left me shaken. There was no question that I was going to stay to help him out. Until he could get back up on his feet again at least. He was going to be okay. He had to be.

Practice took a little over two hours, but that left the rest of the night. I was going to ask Caleb to get drinks, but he was talking about seeing a girl from Engineering tonight.

Should probably get groceries, I thought as I walked out of the gym and slid into my truck. I bought a pack of beer instead. Drove home, ordered a pizza. Slid open the garage door to let the night breeze in and decided to tinker with my tools there. That or drive to her place again.

Psycho stalker.

Sure. Whatever.

"Shouldn't," I muttered under my breath, wiping a wrench until it shone.

I threw the wrench back in my toolbox, and stared at my bike parked on the driveway, considered whether I should use it tonight.

Shit. I felt like a junkie, jonesing for another hit of her. It was dangerous to live so close to her. I knew it was going to be very hard, painful even, but I thought I could control it.

What harm would it do? I would never let her see me again. She wouldn't even know I was there. Just a quick drive by her house. Just to make sure she was safe. What if someone tried to break and enter her house?

Your mother already did.

I gritted my teeth.

Motherfucker. Leave her alone.

I lifted my arm to cover my eyes when bright headlights slapped me in the face, heard the smooth rumble of a vehicle as it parked on my driveway, then turned off. Caleb jumped out of his truck, looking like something pissed him off.

"Got beer?" he asked.

Relief and disappointment mixed inside me. I wasn't going anywhere tonight.

I gestured for him to go in, reached for a rag and wiped my hands.

"Where's your new car?" I asked as soon as we were inside.

"In the shop getting detailed. Someone puked in it."

I opened the fridge, grabbed two beers, threw him one. "Already?"

"Don't ask." He popped the top of his drink. "Do you even sleep?"

"I'd be dead if I didn't."

He rolled his eyes, took a sip. "Maybe you just pretend to sleep because you're a vampire. Explains why you're full of secrets."

I felt my shoulders tense. I had to remind myself that Caleb didn't know them—my darkest secrets. Even I didn't know all of them. Only Raven did. She wasn't going to share them until there was bloodshed. I wasn't planning on giving her even a drop of it.

We stepped out to the deck. There was a slight bite in the air tonight, but I liked it. 

"Got food?" Caleb asked.

"Ordered pizza earlier."

"Great. I'm starving to death."

"Too bad. I ate all of it."

He took a sip of his beer. "Dick."

I scanned the backyard while Caleb ordered pizza. I noted what landscaping was needed, the condition of the fence, the state of the pool. I should take the pool cover off now that winter was over, empty it. Clean the hell out of it.

She wasn't very fond of swimming, but she liked sitting on the edge of the pool, dangling her long legs in the water and staring at the blue lights in it.

Shit. I rubbed my chest, trying to ease the pain from the memory of hazel eyes staring back at me.

"Thought you had a date tonight," I said.

"Ah." He lowered his head. Waited a beat. "Couldn't get it up," he said blandly.

There was silence. Then I snorted out a laugh. He pinched the bridge of his nose, then was laughing with me after a moment.

"Damn," I said. "Might wanna see a doctor about that."

"Man. Didn't know that was even possible." He rubbed his face in frustration, took another sip of his beer.

"What'd you tell her?"

"My pet goldfish died."

"Lame."

"That goldfish was precious to me."

"You don't have a goldfish."

"Yeah, but if I did..." He shrugged, rubbed his thumb on his bottom lip in thought. "There is this girl..." he trailed off.

I waited for him to say more.

"Giving me a hard time." He looked a little lost. "Can't figure her out."

"That's a first."

"Yeah. Anyway." He shook his head as if to clear his thoughts. "So. Did you see Kara yet?"

I shifted away from him, walked to the railing to put some space between us. It irritated me that he could easily say her name when just hearing it felt like a thorn in my chest.

"I went to see Rick."

Caleb leaned against the wall, angled his head to study me. I was changing the subject, and he knew it. Sometimes he'd push, sometimes he let it be. I wasn't in the mood to be pushed tonight.

As soon as Elijah found out about Rick's visits to the hospital, he'd phoned me, Caleb and Benjamin.

"That's not what I asked," he said a little testily.

"Stay the hell out of it." Restless and spoiling for a fight now, I walked to him, daring him to say another word.

He squared his shoulders. His green eyes glittered with eagerness to fight. "You drag that dark mood all over you everywhere and I can't even ask about it?"

"No one asked you to come here."

"Fuck you." He shoved me back. "You've been a vault about your shit for almost a year. I'm still here, aren't I?"

I crushed the empty can of beer in my hand, turned away from him, threw it as far as I could in the yard. It hit a tree. The sound echoed then disappeared.

"I went to Lockmere to get permits the other day," he went on. "Guess who was at the desk?"

"Your therapist?" I snarled.

"You need one to help your sorry ass. It's Edna. The kind and sweet older woman who thinks you're such a good, handsome young man. Catch of the century. Her words, not mine. Didn't have the heart to tell her that you're a fucking prick. Know what she told me?"

I froze. He was talking about the property I bought a few years ago. Where a childhood friend had died. Where I brought Kara and we fucked for the first time. Where she'd given me all of her heart and body and I gave her promises I couldn't keep. Filled with hatred at myself, I shoved my hands in my hair.

"Why'd you buy it? Why didn't you tell anyone? I asked Rick and he said he didn't know either. Did he bring it up to you? I bet he didn't. Everyone around you is walking on eggshells. You know how hard that is?"

"Didn't ask you to come here, did I?"

"If you can get your head out of your ass, you'd know I don't need to understand. When it comes to you, you don't make me understand anyway. Just know that I'm here for you. You fucking son of a bitch."

I lowered my head, rubbing the back of my neck. Ashamed, mollified.

He let out a sigh. "I'm too pissed to tell you that if you need help to fix that dump you bought you can ask me. I'm too pissed. But there you go."

"I know." I met his gaze. "I'm sorry. I just... didn't want to drag anyone in my shit."

He looked at me for a moment, paused. Then shook his head. "Well, if you keep looking at me with those baby blues, I go weak."

I snorted. And felt the tension between us fade. "Next thing you know you're asking me if I want to go steady."

"You couldn't afford this."

The bell rang.

"Pizza's here. You pay for it." Caleb threw his empty beer in the trash, opened the door, stepped inside. Before I could follow behind him, he closed the door on me. "Asshole."

I sighed loud enough so he could hear it. Then when his back was to me, I let myself smile.

A/N: What do you think of Caleb and Cameron's friendship? Ah, my men. I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!

Did you spot any Chasing Red references? There are a few!

This chapter in Cameron's POV has the same timeline in chapter 3 of Chasing Red in Caleb's POV! Adding details is a lot of work, but I love it and I hope you're getting all types of feels when you read them and remember Chasing Red. I might not get everything right, but I will surely try my best! (And edit more later.)

A message from me to you: Don't let it get to you. The world is too big to focus on the negative things that pull you down. There is so much out there waiting for you. Keep going. You got this.


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