Years ago, after Luke's death, I had worked out a secret that had helped me ever since: Crying is easiest in the shower. Tears mix with the water, sobs get drowned out by the noise, red eyes are easily explained by saying you got shampoo in them.

By now my parents were probably thinking I was too stupid to handle a bottle of conditioner.

A week had passed since my father had found me at Hunter's and dragged me home. As soon as he had brought me inside, I had ignored my mother's crying and locked myself in the bathroom.

Before I had done anything else, I called Alexis, asking her to go to Hunter's and check on him. After a few concerned questions, she had hung up with the promise to go there and stay for as long as he needed her.

I hadn't talked to her or him since then. There was just no way I could.

My dad was spending his nights on the couch in the living room downstairs to make sure I didn't leave the house at nights, though I wasn't completely sure if it was just that or if he just didn't want to sleep in a bed with mom.

Over the past week, I had noticed just how distant they were acting around each other, barely talking and if they did it, was in short sentences and usually just about Maya or their job.

In addition to all of it, my parents were driving me to school and picked me up every day to make sure I wasn't meeting anyone afterwards.

I had tried to talk to Hunter at school on Wednesday, but I had barely been able to say hello before Victoria had popped up out of nowhere.

That evening, dad had called the local priest and signed me up for Church Camp starting in two weeks.

There wasn't anything I could do about it. All that was left for me to do was cry when my parents didn't look and put on a strong facade when they did.

Knocks on the bathroom door ripped me out of my thoughts.

"What is taking you so long in there, Juley?" my mom called.

"Just... just a second," I rasped and got up into a standing position from where I had been kneeling on the shower floor.

I hadn't even noticed, but by the time I turned the water off, it had run ice-cold already. My teeth were chattering when I wrapped a towel around me and got into boxers and my pants.

My eyes were staring back at me blearily and red when I finally dared to look into the mirror. I immediately glanced away, took a shaky breath and pulled a shirt over my head.

My mother was still standing next to the door when I left the bathroom.

I ignored her hand on my shoulder and pushed past her instead. "Can you please drive me to work?" I asked quietly without looking at her. "I can't miss another shift. I need the money."

"What for, Juley?" mom wanted to know. "You know we always support you."

I turned around and stared blankly at her. Then, in lack of anything to reply to that, I just shook my head and headed towards my room.

But before I could close the door behind me, her foot blocked it and she pushed into my room with a small smile. "Of course I'll drive you, if that's what you want, baby. Just promise me: no breaking of the rules."

"Hunter won't be there," I said tonelessly. "Victoria likes to spend her afternoons there."

Mom's face lit up with relief at that. "Come on then, let's get there in time for your shift."

I nodded silently and followed her into the car. Maya was sitting in the backseat, so I slid in beside her instead of choosing the passenger seat."Hey Maya."

She looked at me with big eyes. "Juley, why are you sad?" she asked and reached for me, but her seatbelt held her arm back. She grimaced in frustration and dropped her hand back into her lap.

"I'm okay," I whispered and tried to force a smile on my face. Instead I felt tears pricking in my eyes and had to advert my gaze before she could see them.

"Mommy, Juley is sad. You need to give him a hug," Maya said seriously and kicked the back of my mother's seat. "Hugs make people less sad."

"It's okay, Maya. I don't want a hug from mom."

"Do you want a hug from me?" Maya inquired. Her eyes were wide with concern as she stretched her arms out as far as possible.

I looked at her little round face before I leaned over and hugged her small frame back.

"Oh no," Maya said after a moment. I let go of her in confusion. She patted her shoulder with a sad pout. "I'm not a good enough hugger! Mommy, Juley is crying!"

I stared at the wet spot on her shirt and quickly wiped over my eyes with the back of my hand.

Mom looked at me with sad eyes through the rear view mirror. "Please, Jules. Not in front of your sister. She will just worry about you."

"That would be a first, right?" I asked and suppressed a bitter laugh. I knew that if I started laughing now, hysteria wouldn't let me stop. "Someone in my family worrying about me."

I could see my mom wince before she adverted her eyes shamefully.

"Why are you sad?" Maya whispered to me.

For a moment I searched for the right words to say. Then I quietly muttered: "I just... really miss someone I love very much."

"Who do you miss?"

"His name is-"

"We're here," my mother cut in before I could say his name. "I will pick you up in three hours."

I glared at her, but climbed out of the car without protest. Every minute away from my parents was a good one, I just hated that it kept me away from Maya.

The doorbell jingled when I entered the Starbucks, making Darryl look over at me. He came out from behind the counter as soon as he saw me.

"Jules, are you okay?" he asked with one hand resting on my shoulder.

"I'm fine," I lied. "Sorry that I missed my last shifts. My parents wouldn't drive me here."

"Don't worry about it, Jade stepped in for you. She was worried out of her mind when you didn't come, though. She's in my office right now, so maybe say hi so she knows you're alright."

"I will. I'm really sorry. It won't happen again."

"I don't care if you cut some hours. I just need to know you're alright," Darryl said seriously.

I couldn't stand the look of concern in his eyes, so I trained my eyes on my shoes instead. "I'm alright. I promise."

Darryl looked at me for a long moment before he squeezed my shoulder. "If you say so. I'm here if you need to talk though."

I smiled timidly at him before I walked past him and knocked at the door to his office.

Red ripped the door open before my second knock. She wouldn't even let me say anything, but pulled me into a bone-crushing hug. "Screw you, J," she muttered against my shoulder. "Hunter told me what happened. Do you have any idea how worried I was?"

"I'm sorry," I wheezed when she finally let go of me. "I wanted to come, really."

"If you apologize one more time I'm going to kill you," she said sternly. "Now give me your mobile."

I stared at her in confusion. "What do you need my phone for?"

Even though her words were harsh, her eyes were looking at me with warmth and worry I had never seen on her before. "I'm going to save my number in your contacts so that the next time something happens, you call me. I don't want to have any of your I'm okay-crap, I want you to call me so I can help. So, give me your phone."

I handed it over wordlessly.

For a second, the only sound was the clicking of her black acrylic nails against the buttons. Then she asked: "Hey, do you have any photos of us on your phone I can use as a profile picture for my contact? I want you to actually find it when you're looking for my number."

"Yeah, there are a few selfies if you go back in my gallery, I think," I said.

She nodded as she began scrolling through my photos. Then she looked up at me with a frown. "Why do you have weird stalker pictures of your parents getting it on?"

"I... what?" I asked and snatched the phone out of her hand to have a look.

My jaw dropped when I saw the picture. "Oh my god. Oh my god!" I exclaimed and waved the display around in front of her eyes frantically. "I remember this! Oh my god!"

"What is it? J, you're acting crazy," Red said in bewilderment.

"They aren't my parents. I mean, it's my dad, but not my mom. Hunter took this the other day before the accident," I gushed and sunk onto Darryl's chair. "I totally forgot about it, but now I remember. I remember, Red! He's cheating!"

Red looked absolutely lost by now. "Why are you so happy about that?"

Hunter's words echoed through my head again. Maybe this can come in handy... Now you finally have something against your father.

"I can do something now. I have a way out. Fuck, Jade, I have a way out!" I laughed, for the first time in days. "Thank you so much, you're an angel."

Red's features finally lit up with understanding. "Shit. Are you really gonna do this?"

"I would be the world's biggest idiot if I passed up this chance now, wouldn't I?"

Red pressed a hand to her chest and sunk back against Darryl's desk dramatically as she declared: "I don't think I've ever been prouder of you in my entire life. "Before I could reply, she called out: "Hey, baby! Jules is gonna ruin his parents' marriage so he can be with loverboy!"

"Wait, what?" we heard Darryl calling from the shop. Seconds later, he slithered into the room. "You're insane."

"Perhaps a little," I agreed. "But I'm sick of being locked up and hushed and not listened to and of not being understood and not being able to be with my boyfriend. So if splitting up my family is the last resort, then to hell with it. My family went to shit years ago."

For a few seconds, Darryl and Red just stared at me. Then I suddenly felt myself squished between them as they both went to hug me, Red wrapping her arms around my waist from one side while Darryl was pulling me against his chest, knocking all the air out of me.

"Hey, Jules?" Darryl asked.

"Yeah?" I panted, struggling to breathe but not wanting them to ever let go of me all at the same time.

"If what you're planning to do doesn't work out, you can come and live with me for a while."

I twisted so that I could look up at him. "Are you... Are you serious?"

Darryl nodded solemnly. "Of course. I'm living in the apartment upstairs, right above the shop. There's a spare couch that's uncomfortable as hell, but... At least you'd be out of your parents' reach."

"Thank you," I said, a disbelieving smile spreading on my face.

"No sweat, little guy," Darryl answered.

Behind me, Red laughed and ruffled my hair before she let go of me. "After a week you'll want to move out, I guarantee you that. He is awful at cooking, never cleans his room and snores like a seventy-year-old."

"Oh? You didn't seem to mind all of that for the entire last month when you basically moved in with me," Darryl huffed.

Red just smiled sweetly and swiftly kissed his cheek before skipping out of the room. "You like having me around."

Darryl glared after her for a second, then he turned back to me. "You okay?"

I nodded. "Yeah. I'll get to work then."

+++

It was my dad who picked me up from work. He narrowed his eyes at me when he saw me looking remotely happy for a change, but didn't bother asking about it.

"Hello dad," I said as I got into the passenger seat.

Instead of replying, dad turned the radio as high as possible and didn't spare me another glance.

I, on the other hand, couldn't take my eyes off him. Knowing he had been cheating on my mom for months, made me see him in an entirely different light.

Glancing at his hand resting on the steering wheel, I couldn't help but wonder how many times he had slipped that ring on his finger into his pocket before, disregarding any thought of his wife and children.

Had he felt guilty all those times? Had he kissed my mother and thought of another woman instead? Had he compared them in his mind? Had he thought about leaving us?

I chose not to dwell on it too much. Yes, I hated my father for what he had done, not only to me but to my mother as well, but the thought of splitting my parents up made my stomach churn.

Luckily, the ride back home didn't take long, and I fled my father's unyielding silence as soon as the car rocked to a stop.

I followed my father into the house in silence, but we had barely closed the door behind us when the bell rang.

When dad opened the door, I nearly yelped in surprise when I saw who was standing in the threshold

Loaded with a bag and a pile of blankets, Alexis smiled politely at my dad. "Good evening, Mr. Hatcher."

"Alex? What are you doing here?" I asked, coming up behind my father to get a better look at her.

Alexis looked pointedly at me. "Hey, Jules. You invited me over for a sleepover, remember?"

"Oh! Oh, yeah, of course!" I said and turned to my father. "Dad, Alexis will be staying here tonight, is that alright?"

My father looked utterly confused. "You never mentioned an Alexis..."

"That's because you never talk to me anymore," I pointed out.

"I really hope it's alright that I'll sleep here," Alex chimed in. "See, my parents are out of town and I don't really have anywhere else to go right now..."

"Of course you're welcome to stay," mom immediately said from the other end of the corridor. "Come on in!"

"Thanks so much, Mrs. Hatcher. I really appreciate it," Alex said happily and nearly shoved my father out of the way in her hurry to get inside.

"Wait, let me carry something," I muttered and took the blankets out of her hands. "My room is upstairs."

Alexis, still smiling, followed me up the stairs and into my room. There she dropped her bag and settled on the edge of my bed.

As soon as the door was shut behind me, I carefully asked, "What are you doing here?"

"Well, I thought, since the prom is tomorrow, you might be feeling a little down," Alex stated. "Hunter is devastated that you guys can't be there together, so I thought maybe you'd feel the same and you'd like someone to keep you company." When she saw the look on my face, she added: "Don't worry, Hunter's taken care of by Adam and Liam."

"Oh. Alright. Thank you."

"You're welcome," she laughed. "So, any plans on what you want to do tonight?"

"Uhm... There actually is something I wanted to do. Did Hunter tell you about my dad?"

"That he's cheating? He mentioned it." She ran a hand through her hair. "Is it true that you want to tell your mom?"

"Yeah," I said.

She nodded slowly for a few seconds. I felt increasingly uncomfortable under her thoughtful stare, so I was glad when she finally said something. "You know that you might lose your father, right?"

I only shook my head. "He lost me a long time ago."

Alexis considered that for a moment before she got to her feet. "Alright. Then I'll be there and try to help. If you want me to, that is."

"That'd be great, actually," I said, suppressing a relieved sigh. When another person was around, my father was less likely to throw a fit.

"Okay. Let's get it over with then, right?" she asked, nudging me with her elbow.

Instead of replying, I opened the door and led the way into the living room, where my parents were watching TV. I was suddenly immensely grateful that Maya was in her room upstairs so she wouldn't have to witness all the drama that was about to take place.

Alexis closed the door and leaned against it, sending me an encouraging smile.

My parents still didn't look at me, so to get their attention I grabbed the remote and simply turned the TV off.

Both their heads snapped up instantly, one face filled with confusion, the other with disdain.

"We need to talk," I began, gathering all of my courage.

"We don't need to do anything," my father hissed. "Now turn the damn thing back on."

"Andrew," my mother quietly warned after sending a cautious look Alexis' way.

"Don't worry, dad," I coldly said. "I'll make it worth your while. I've got quite an interesting story to tell, so lean back and enjoy."

"Julian, what on earth-" he started, but he got cut off immediately.

Alexis had her arms crossed over her chest and looked completely calm and collected when she said: "Hush, Mr. Hatcher. You will want to hear this one."

My father stared daggers at her, but she only replied with a raised eyebrow and the hint of a smirk twitching around her lips.

When my father remained silent, I began.

"This is the story of a man who was a loving husband and the proud father of two children he loved more than anything else. He had a great job, a great car, a great home. His life was perfect, or at least that was what one might have thought," I said and couldn't quite keep a sardonic undertone from my voice.

My father was quiet now, watching me warily as I started pacing around.

"But one day, he found something out about his son that he didn't like. At all. Because of his old childhood trauma and learned intolerance, he chose to hate his son instead of trying to understand him. Does this sound familiar?" I asked sharply, looking at my father.

His face was a mask of anger and displeasure as he stammered: "What are you trying to-"

"Don't worry, this will get even more interesting. Especially for you, mom," I said. "The man became even more bitter and hateful than he had started to grow after the death of his first son," I said, even though the words stung on my tongue. "He started looking for a way out. He tried to distract himself with work, alcohol... and women."

I paused, not only for dramatic effect, but to be able to fully enjoy the look of shock on my father's face. His jaw was slack, his eyes bulging. He looked like a caricature of himself.

"So, while his wife was at home with his children, he went out with other women under the pretence of attending business meetings. Who knows how long he would've done that if it wasn't for his son, who caught him red-handed? And who know will set an end to this."

The more I talked, the more words started to spill. I couldn't stop, but I didn't want to anyway. It felt good, saying these things. It felt good to escape the silence I had been forced into. A video started all of this and now I was going to end it with pictures.

Dropping the phone into my mothers's lap, I said: "Now it's your choice, mom. I gave you everything you need to know. What are you going to do with it?"