Mending old Wounds

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Violet

I woke up to the feel of strong arms holding me. My back was pressed against my mate and the heat from his body kept me warm as he slept. I started to recall what had happened yesterday and my mood shifted from feeling warm and loved, to a feeling of guilt at having lost our pup. I shifted out of the warmth that Dimitri's embraced offered me and sat up with a start, not quiet feeling worthy of it in that moment.

Swinging my legs around to touch the floor I sat on the side of the bed to stare out of Dimitri's bedroom window. The birds tweeted and the trees swayed to the breeze of the wind. Their movements and sounds calming my thoughts.

I can't remember much after I woke up yesterday. I remember the feeling of the rain hitting my face and being held by my mate, but my memory ended there. I had no recollection as to how I ended up in his room, but I suddenly felt uncomfortable. Like I didn't truly belong here. His intoxicating smell permeated the space between us and Layla was calmed by his presence.

I felt him stir behind me. He remained quiet, trying to gauge my thoughts, but I had quickly erected a mind barrier between us. Not quite ready for him to see ALL of me just yet. Silly, considering he had seen all of my body. But not yet my mind. I felt vulnerable now that our lives were not in jeopardy. Would he still feel the same way he did yesterday? Or was that a spur of the moment thing?

I felt his warm lips tenderly kiss the apex between my neck and my shoulder blade. I instinctively trembled at his loving touch. The sparks flying over the part he had touched me. He stayed quiet in contemplation and the silence soothed and alleviated the tension brewing within my mind. He was happy just sitting next to me and that made me happy too. He was Just waiting for me to speak first, no pushing, in fact, there was no pressure at all. He was Just allowing me to talk if I wanted too.

And I found that I did not.

We sat there for best part of an hour as my brain processed yesterdays events. He held me and hugged me close to him as I closed my eyes and enjoyed the comfort he offered. After a while, he spoke.

"I love you Violet, and I hope you will let me in so we can repair the damage I caused to us".

I tutted.

"I already forgave you for that" I said quietly.

"Then why won't you let me in?" He knocked on my head affectionately and I smiled at his teasing.

"We knew each other as children Dimitri, but we never had the opportunity to know one another as adults" I explained.

"Ahhhh" he smiled, finally understanding my meaning.

"You want to take things slow and get to know each other"? He played with my hair nervously as he asked and I nodded.

He seemed to accept this a lot quicker than I initially thought he would. Without warning, I was thrown onto my back as Dimitri lay on top of me, protectively caging me beneath his hard body. His eyes boring down into my own intensely.

"I never thanked you for saving my life" he said.

I smiled, but then my smile faded again as I looked away trying to quell the tears beginning to form. Remembering the cost of saving my mate.

"Shhh" he said as he strocked my face to wipe away my tears.

"Our pup will come back to us. The Goddess will do the right thing you have to trust in her".

I huffed.

"She wants unity between Werewolves and Vampire's Dimitri. What she has asked for is impossible, and besides, it is all in an attempt to rile her Goddess counterpart. There is no feeling or conscious thought to the hurt or pain she causes us. We are nothing more than puppets to them, their little creations and dolls to play with. I used to admire and adore her, now look at me".

....

He said nothing and I sighed.

"Our pup isn't coming back". I whispered.

Cupping my face, Dimitri's eyes turned serious before he replied.

"I believed you would never come back to me, but you did. This pack thought you could never be a powerful Luna, but you proved them wrong. If anyone can unite werewolves and...

Dimitri's mouth pursed as he struggled to mouth the word..

"Vampires....." he said through gritted teeth.

"Then it is you mate. Our pup is not gone. He or she... will come back to us".

I smiled at his confidence before his soft eyes turned lustful and the mood changed. I grabbed a hold of his face and kissed him suddenly. The kiss was fiery and passionate and when we both finally pulled apart we were out of breath.

"So... what's your favourite colour"? He asked. His face serious.

I broke into a fit of laughter and so did he. I pushed against his chest.

"And once I give you the answer you think we can mate again do you"? I teased.

He pouted and I kissed him again.

This time, it was his turn to turn serious.

"I almost lost you Violet. I'll do anything you ask of me if it means you will stay with me. And will you, stay with me that is"?

His face looked hopeful and I smiled.

He grinned and he picked up strands of my hair and placed it above his lip to create a moustache.

"Pftssss... get off" I laughed as I pushed him away.

"Its time to speak with the pack and start as we mean to go on".

He sighed at my rejection.

"And how do we mean to go on"? He waged his eyebrows to me and I struggled not to giggle again.

"As a unit of course. RedFang need leadership from their Alpha and Luna. We need to rebuild the pack and welcome the newcomers. We lost too many of our warriors. With the council on the loose we need to re build our pack and quickly, as I don't trust them not to do anything".

His head tilted to the side as he assessed me.

"You know, my father once told me that he thought you wouldn't make a very good Luna".

I stopped in my attempt to get dressed and turned to face him. Taken a back by his honesty. Hearing that, kind of hurt my feelings although I tried hard not to show it. To think, I spent so long looking for affirmation and acceptance from Alpha Malcolm and my father... I mean Beta Richard, I reminded myself.

He rose from the bed and walked over to me. He pushed me against the wall and his lips hovered just above my own. My heart began to race and my breasts pushed instinctively against his chest.

He grinned at my bodies reaction to him.

"I think he was wrong. You'll be the best Luna this pack has ever seen".

I smiled and threw my arms around his neck to hug him. He hugged me back and we clung to one another. It was easy between us. No nerves at all, It just felt right when he held me.

He leant down and whispered into my ear.

"Don't shut me out for too long. I want to know all of you... not just this".

He said right before he smacked my butt. I giggled as he got changed and opened the door of his room for me.
Walking passed him and down the stairs it all felt so surreal. The last time I entered this house I found out Dimitri was my mate and he rejected me that very same night.

Now, I am the Luna of the pack and I had no idea whether they would accept me or not. My nerves beat me down and I paused just before reaching the bottom step of the stairs. Dimitri's hand rested on my waist, pushing me forward in support.

"Go get 'em' tiger" he sang from behind me.

Taking a deep breath in, I rounded the corner to where the packs communal area was. The pack had been having breakfast but stopped immediately upon mine and Dimitri's arrival. My old pack paused and gave me one or two looks of uncertainty. A few others gave me a small 'sorry' smile and the ones who had bullied me in my youth turned away awkwardly.

Dimitri stepped to my side and took a hold of my hand, offering me his support.

"Pack members, what we have all endured recently should be proof enough that life is too short for conflict or hatred. Under my fathers rule, he allowed discord to form amongst this pack. This will come to an end today. If you accept me as your Alpha, you will also accept Violet as your Luna. She has more than earned the right to stand by my side. If you oppose this, I urge you to find a new home in one of the neighbouring packs".

A few of the pack members closest to me gave me a few smiles of encouragement and I returned that smile hesitantly. Not quite willing to become too friendly just yet.

"I will stand by our Luna and offer her loyalty and fealty as I do to my Alpha" spoke Beta Gavin.

His support meant the world to me and I was touched when all of the pack rose to their feet to offer me the same loyalty. I smiled up at Dimitri and he motioned for me to take a seat at the Alpha's table.
It hit me in that moment that I had spent so many days in my younger years seated on a table on my own. Looking up to this very table, yearning and wishing to be apart of it.

Ironic, that it was always to be my fate.

"For those who truly accept Violet, I ask you approach her to give her your welcome" Dimitri said.

One by one, I was graced with tears and thankfulness from the women of the pack. All of them offering their support and providing small talk as a way to compensate and gloss over the fractured relationship I had with them. Totally avoiding the elephant in the room. A few, even apologised for how they had treated me as a child. I found I respected that far more than the small talk from the others.

Direct and frank was just how I liked it.

The men too sometimes apologised and one or two of them struggled to look at me directly in the eye. Embarrassed by their previous attitude and I myself struggled to deal with the awkwardness of it all. Knowing that they had clearly seen the memories of my past in which they used to ridicule me on, bothered me. Them seeing my weakest moment 'bothered' me. I had no satisfaction on that memory proving my innocence at all. I had felt weakened by what they seen of their Luna's fall from grace, far more than having to endure the act itself. Them seeing my pride stripped away from me had almost brought the women closer to together however. All of them offering words of kindness and encouragement for my bravery yesterday. Smoozing up to their new Luna.

My smile dipped when I saw Beatrice and Alice approach. I looked down towards my hands but felt Dimitri's hand grip my shoulder. He sent me a wave of strength into my mind and my spine rose.

"I am happy you are back Luna. I hope we can be friends?" Alice asked with uncertainty in her eyes. Her small, sweet voice made me smile instantly and I nodded as I extended my hand out towards her.

"Pinky promise" I said.

Her six year olds face lit up as she took my pinky. Dimitri chuckled but my face dropped as soon as Alice left us to run off and join her friends. I looked into the eyes of Beatrice and my face turned to stone. Her face crumbled beneath my stare and she fidgeted with her clothing as she struggled to find any words for me. Not that they would be genuine mind you. But it still amused me all the same, watching her stumble to find them. I decided to find some of my own first.

"I killed your Grandson James"!

I stated.

Direct as always.

Dimitri flinched. He made eye contact with me and I could see the question in his eyes. She gulped and looked down towards her hands. Her lips pursed as she tried to withhold her tears.

"I have no regrets in doing so. If you have a problem with that, I suggest you find another pack".

I kept my voice firm. There was no use in offering kind words. Not after how she treated me or what James himself had done in both the past or present. All through my youth I regarded her as a grand motherly figure until she encouraged James to abuse me.

Now.

I had no kind words.

She nodded despondent.

"You did what was right Luna. I came to offer my loyalty and to apologise for my passed behaviour towards you. I hope I can make amends some day. And I want to ask something of you, so I may have an opportunity at redeeming myself".

Looking up towards Dimitri he coughed.

"And how would you do that"? He asked.

"I want to assist Milly in raising your nephew".

My eyebrows soared into my hairline just as Dimitri's jaw dropped.

"What are you saying Beatrice"? I asked incredulously.

She sighed and I have to say the woman finally looked like a pole had been surgically removed from her ass. For the first time in years she looked freed by her confession which sent both Dimitri and I reeling.

"Your father, Alpha Malcolm, was going through a rough patch with your mother the Luna when you were a young boy and he took a fancy one night to my daughter. Something we never talked about to save face for the Luna at the time. But James was your half brother Alpha".

Dimitri's face turned a pale white and I jumped quickly to find him a chair to sit down on. Looking around, I had noticed the entire hall was deathly silent. Everyone listening in intently on the drama before us. I locked eyes with Milly who looked as shocked as I felt and recognition dawned.

"That is why he smelt like an Alpha. He has Alpha blood in him". I stated.

Beatrice nodded.

I held Dimitri's hand in support and opened my mind to him. He was devastated that he never knew.

"Did James know"? Asked Dimitri.

She shook her head.

"I didn't tell him, his own gene's were not that of an Alpha like your own, so I thought there would be no use in telling him. His character, however, was always trying to compete so that could have been a problem if he knew".

"A character trait you yourself encouraged" I admonished.

She flinched at my reprimand.

"No.. you will not have an opportunity to do so. I suggest you set your mind on taking care of Alice and nothing more. If the child needs guidance he has a mother and an Uncle and Aunt for support. However, I do appreciate your honesty". I said.

She bit the inside of her lip thoughtfully before showing me her neck in submission. When she walked away I suggested to Dimitri that he spend some time alone getting his head together. He agreed and I promised to follow as soon as I spoke to Milly. He needed time to process this information. After all, he lost a pup and gained a dead brother and a nephew all within the space of a day. It was a lot to take in.

Walking over to Milly she sat quietly in thought. I ended the morning breakfast and most of the pack began to leave the hall. Sitting next to her I looked down towards the small child in question.

"I felt him die through our link. I didn't know that you killed him though. Thank you for making it quick". She said.

Her eyes were downcast to her son and I myself looked towards the small life she cradled. Feeling the guilt for a moment.

"Have you decided on a name yet"? I asked her.

She sighed.

"No, I hope you don't hate me.. but I was going to name him after his father. I know he wasnt a good wolf, but I think if things had of been different and his penchant for power had not come between us, we could have been happy".

I nodded.

"Then James it is" I said.

Her eyes wide and she shook her head.

"No, I couldn't do that. It wouldn't be right". She rushed to explain and I held up my hand to cut her off.

"It is right. Regardless of how things were, James was still his father. I think it suits him". I said.

I grabbed a hold of his little hand and his eyes opened to greet mine. He grinned a wide toothless grin and Milly chuckled.

"Did you mean what you said to Beatrice? You'll help me to look after him"?

Her eyes were wide with hope. When I smiled in response she exhaled in relief as I spoke again.

"He is family and he will be protected. But we should discuss how we will break things to him one day".

"Such as"? She asked.

"The fact his aunt killed his father". I clarified and Milly flinched at my words. Her eyes clouded with unshed tears and I rubbed her back in comfort.

"It will be fine, I'm sure it will". I said to try and help her grief.

After my conversation with Milly, I stood to try and find Dimitri. As I walked through the pack grounds the pack nodded and bowed.

It felt odd being back here. Seeing the faces of those who had once hated me, shower me with respect. I doubted I would ever get used to it. Before long, I found him. He was standing on the grounds of our training field. A shiver automatically ran through me when I saw the scorched grass and paw mark's marring the once perfect grass of the field. The only evidence of the chaos and barbaric trial which ensued just the day before. Walking over to Dimitri his back was facing me. I wrapped my arms around his torso. Hugging him from behind..

"How did he die"? He asked.

I swallowed the bile forming in my throat.

"It was quick and painless. I promise you that he didnt suffer". I whispered.

"I let him down just like I let you down". He said.

"None of us knew who he was Dimitri. If anyone is to blame it's your father. He should have told you both the truth years ago. If you do not feel satisfied blaming someone who is dead, then blame someone who is living. Me...".

Dimitri turned around to face me. His face full of confusion at my words. I explained..

"I was the one who took his life Dimitri".

Dimitri sighed and looked down to the space between us. He took a hold of my hand and placed it over his heart.

"You have been blamed for enough things in your life my love. Besides, as much as I would like to think otherwise, we both know James was not a good wolf. It may have had to have been me needing to end his life, and I could not have lived with myself if I knew what  he was to me. Maybe my father knew that too".

I nodded.

A few moments passed between us and once Dimitri was calm he hugged me again.

"Its time that we mend the alliances and go about creating a strong community of packs again. After the fall of the council, something needs to be put in place so we can ensure the old alliances continue. The longer we leave it, the more uneasy I feel".

Dimitri nodded and stroked my hair.

Within a nano second, his back stiffened slightly and his eyes turned hard as he stared at someone behind me. Turning to see who it was, I was surprised to see Alec standing behind us. His eyes looked broken and he stared at the ground between Dimitri and I. He looked disappointed and my chest hurt at the thought of hurting him. Dimitri squeezed my shoulder and kissed my forehead affectionately.

"Go and talk to him" he said.

My eyes rounded in disbelief.

"You're sure"? I asked, not quite believing how mature he was acting over the whole thing. He gave me a reassuring smile. But the 'reassuring' aspect was lost. He wasn't happy that I needed to talk to Alec. But he was trying to make me happy and I was thankful for that. Dimitri eventually detached himself from my arms and walked over to Alec. Alec straightened his spine, waiting on Dimitri to speak. He surprised both of us when he held his arm out towards him in respect.

Alec took his open hand and they both shook on it. I was floored and completely unaware of the 'bro' like friendship or understanding which seemed to have formed between the two male wolves. Dimitri, patted Alec on the back and left us alone together.

When he walked away from us, I instantly felt lonely and tried to shake it off. Walking towards Alec, I smiled and gave him a hug. He sighed into my hair and when

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