Chapter 79 | Distance

Lucas:

The sting of rejection stays with me all throughout the rest of the party. It's not very major but still, her consciously moving her hand away as I had tried to slip mine into hers nevertheless had brought a tightness to my chest as it had happened - it still brings a tightness to my chest everytime I think about it.  Especially because she's been acting distant on top of that too.

Maybe it's something I shouldn't be overthinking, but no matter how hard I try, I can't get the niggling feeling out of the back of my mind.

It's also heightened my view on every action Isabella has towards me, towards everyone and everything in general from that moment onwards.

I find myself over analysing the way she reacts to me saying something to her, what her barely making eye contact with me means, if it means anything. How she keeps to herself when the rest of us all converse in a big group. How even Leo notices something off about Bella and how she brushes him off with a seemingly fake smile when he asks if she's okay.

She continues to remain quiet for the rest of the party, appearing to be lost in thought all throughout and only really speaks when she is spoken to. It therefore does not take long for me to conclude that something majorly is up with Isabella.

***

"You alright?" I ask Isabella as all of us file into one of Zak's guest rooms and spread out, taking seats in various spaces in the room.

By 'all of us', I mean our friend group, Leo, Sammy, Zak, Angie and somehow Lucy - Grace's little sister too.

Isabella nods and shifts ever so slightly to create a tiny distance between the two of us as I sit beside her on the bed. Ouch.

"Yeah, I'm good," she responds, adding a little 'pep' to her reply as she speaks, something I take note is truly just to cover up the fact she is not good. "Just a little tired, I can't wait to go home and sleep."

I nod and eye her curiously as Bella keeps her eyes downcasted to her lap and begins to play with the hem of her dress.

I'm about to say something else when Mia's loud groan cuts me off and I turn my head, my attention drawing onto Mia instead as she flops face down on the bed beside Isabella and I.

"I'm bored," her whine is muffled against the covers.

"Me too," Isabella says.

"We should play truth or dare." Grace offers, stretching her long legs in front of her as she sits beside Aidan on the floor.

"That's a kiddie party game," Mia groans and thrashes her legs about immaturely.

"There's no alcohol at this party, it already feels like a kid party, what's the issue if we play kiddie party games?" Lucy points out. 11 year old Lucy points out.

Dylan reaches forward and fist bumps her. "Preach," he says as Lucy, in awe, retracts her hand and cradles her fist to her chest and I'm sure, secretly kisses the knuckles where Dylan had touched only moments before.

"Fine," Mia lifts her head up from the bed and gazes across at everyone. "You all up for a game of truth or dare?" She asks and is met with a reply of bored 'sure's'.

"Dirty edition?" She then adds with a raise of her eyebrow.

"Not too dirty," Aidan points at Lucy. "There's a child."

"Please," Lucy rolls her eyes and crosses her arms across her chest. "I'm very mature for my age."

"You're not mature," Grace snorts. "You just had internet access at a way too young age."

Lucy shrugs her shoulders.

"Alright, truth or dare, tame edition," Mia sighs and sits up on the bed. "Everyone sit in a circle."

We all shuffle so that we're all on the floor, cross legged and sitting in a circle. Leo of course ends up next to Dylan, taking the space where Lucy was going to sit and Lucy in retaliation sends Leo the dirtiest look I've ever seen in the history of dirty looks.

Leo's eyes widen and he averts his gaze quickly.

Lucy takes a seat next to Mia, so she's sitting directly opposite Dylan. I take a seat beside her so I'm opposite Isabella who, by the way, continues to avoid all eye contact with me at all costs.

The rest file into the empty spaces of the circle and Mia searches around her for something to use as the spiny thing that will pick who gets chosen to do the truth or the dare.

Just as the game is about to begin, the door creaks open. "Is Lucy in here?" Coach Cassidy aka Lucy and Grace's father asks, ducking his head under the doorframe as he steps inside the room, his tall and muscular frame seemingly making the entire room appear smaller than it actually is as he looks around in search of his daughter.

"I'm here dad," Lucy perks up from beside me.

Coach Cassidy's gaze meets hers and he nods his head. "Come, Avery is here, she's looking for you."

Lucy jumps up from her seat and rushes towards her father without a beat of hesitation. "My favourite cousin!" She squeals and follows her dad out of the room excitedly.

Once the door shuts behind the two of them, Mia grins and let's out an enthusiastic sigh. "The child is gone so we can scrap the tame version of this game! Yay!"

Dylan mirrors Mia's abashed smile. "Bring on the dirty stuff! Who's going first?"

"Me!" Grace raises her hand and Mia nods, passing her the bottle of water that she's decided to use as a spinner. Grace places it in the middle of the circle before spinning it around.

We all watch patiently as it moves before it slowly comes to a halt in front of Aidan.

"Truth or dare babe?" Grace quirks a brow.

Aidan grins and stares at his girlfriend knowingly. "Dare."

"Hm," Grace taps her chin in thought, her lips curling up into a smirk. "What dare should I give you?..."

We all collectively groan knowing what's coming next.

***

Rounds of the game fly by fairly quickly. The room is filled with cheers and laughter and wolf whistles - all that Isabella remains un-apart of as the dares and truths grow more intense with each round.

After Grace had dared Aidan to make out with her for 3 minutes straight in round 1 and then the two had failed to stop kissing and groping each other after the 3 minutes had passed, the rest of us had continued to play the game without the two of them. The two however, had rejoined the game finally after round 5, just in time to hear Mia give a detailed description of the best sex she's had of her life paired with non-naked, but very crude visuals that her and Sammy perform.

Once Mia and Sammy finally stop dry humping and Zak puts away the notebook he had been writing notes in based on Mia's vivid story and their 'presentation', the bottle is spinned once again.

We all watch intently as it spins waiting for it to stop and as it slows down...the front of the bottle finally pauses to land on...me.

Jeez, okay.

"Truth or dare?" Mia asks me breathlessly, her hair a complete mess.

"Truth," I return, to which the room erupts with groans in reply.

"C'mon Lucas that's so boring, I thought you'd pick dare," Dylan whines disappointedly.

"I am not doing any dare that she chooses," I point a finger accusedly at Mia. "I'll end up naked and prancing around the room in 5 seconds flat with whatever it is that she'll come up with."

"Don't act like you wouldn't like that," Leo snorts.

My eyes narrow. "Shutup Leona-" I stop short and glance at Isabella (who doesn't glance back) before letting out an annoyed huff of breath. "Shut up Leo," I mutter under my breath.

I then square my shoulders and turn back to Mia as she grins wildly.

"Hit me with what you got Mi," I sigh, "seeing as I chose truth you can intensify the question a little."

I've barely finished my sentence before Mia asks me her question very enthusiastically. "What's the weirdest thing you've jerked off to?"

"Oh." I raise my eyebrows. That's not too bad, I was expecting something more intense.

Mia wiggles her eyebrows.

"Uhhh lets see," I say, racking my thoughts for an answer. An answer that surprisingly doesn't take long for me to come up with seeing as it happened somewhat recently.

I chuckle sheepishly and my eyes flicker to Isabella once.

Okay, this is bound to get a reaction from her.

The motion doesn't go unnoticed by Mia and her smirk widens as she nods her head knowingly. I shake my head amusedly as I realise what Mia thinks I'm thinking.

It's not that.

Plus the thought of that is not exactly a 'weird' thing to jerk off to.

It's not like I do anyways.

(Ehem, lies).

"Alright," I begin, flitting my eyes across everyone in the group. That is somewhat of a mistake because I shrink down slightly as I note everyone's expectant and curious gazes. I clear my throat.

"So there was this book that I was reading," I begin slowly, clearing my throat again. This is a bit weird to admit to a whole ass audience. "And the um sex scenes were quite explicit, so I, got you know and I, uh, yeah." I wince slightly. "Yeah..." I shake my head and knit my brows. "The after-coming-clarity hit hard after that...I mean...it's words....on dead...trees."

"A book?" Mia whines incredulously after I finish speaking and I nod. "Seriously? I thought you'd say you jerked off imagining doing some weird kinky shit with," she pauses to lower her voice. "You know who, not a freaking book!"

My shoulders lift and then fall in a shrug.

"Ugh," Mia growls and crosses her arms across her chest dispiritedly. "That is disappointing."

"Wait...a book?"

"Yeah."

"A book?"

Mia nods and huffs out a breath and turns her head to where Isabella is sitting, as do I. "So lame isn't it."

Isabella blinks before staring straight back at me. "A book?" She repeats slowly and I nod. Bingo! We got a reaction out of her. "What exactly was the book called?"

Her eyes narrow and I feel my cheeks flush pink.

I feel the stare of everyone on me now.

Huh, this is a bit more embarrassing now.

"Ehem," I respond, stalling a bit and feeling a sheepish expression draw its way onto my face.

"Luke...what was the book called?" Isabella asks slowly and in a stern manner.

I wait a beat before replying. "...The...deal-"

"Oh my God," she immediately burrows her face into her hand. 'That's my book!" Her cry is muffled. "My book!"

"Yes..."

Silence follows my response and after a moment passes, Isabella slowly glances up to meet my gaze again.

"So last week when you said you wanted to borrow one of my favourite books to read I got excited for no reason? I thought I could covert you to bookism so we could talk about books together but no you burrowed them to fucking beat your meat to?"

I raise my palms up in surrender. "Hey! That wasn't my intention! I wanted to read it because you said the plot was good! It's not my fault I got a little turned on by it!"

Isabella groans and smacks her palm against her forehead repeatedly. "And to think I was going to ask for the book back today-" She waves her find dismissively and her voice raises a pitch, "it's fine...you can keep it forever. I'd probably have to burn it if you gave it back."

"I was going to ask if you wanted to recreate the scenes-"

"Idiot. Don't even go there!" Isabella scowls, she throws her hands up in the air frustratedly. "My poor book!"

"I'll buy you a new one," I mumble solemnly. She narrows her eyes and turns away from me again in an irritated manner but I can't help but smirk back at her frame.

At least I got her to talk to me. Even if I've both annoyed and somewhat disgusted her.

Mia clears her throat and I suddenly plummet back into reality. Damn I forgot we had an audience.

"Let's continue with the game."

I nod my head and clap my hands together. "Right. So is it my turn to spin?"

***

Surprisingly, after we all quit the game at round 10 (once Sammy dares Mia to suck his dick in the middle of the room and we all run away asap in order to escape the live porn fest) the rest of the party goes by agonizingly slow.

Once the guests leave and the rest of us stay behind to help tidy away the mess; Isabella talking to me is short lived and so is her annoyance towards me over her boner inducing book.

She goes back to keeping her distance but does from time to time, interact with me, in order to not raise any suspicions on my part that she is avoiding me.

Exhibit A: She asks me where the garbage bags are when they are right in front of her.

Exhibit B: She asks me if I want a drink when the drink table is right next to me.

Exhibit C: She asks me if I've done the spring break history homework when we did the entire essay together last week.

God, it's cute that she thinks she's so slick.

Isabella blissfully unaware that I know something is up with her. I'm planning on confronting her in the car on the drive home. The anticipation for that moment is probably what is making the party go by uber slow.

I've learned my lesson to not pry all the time and to respect Isabella's boundaries but there is something different with the way she's acting around me now which is probing me to want to ask what's going on.

Although at first I thought she was 100% ignoring me, as the day had dragged on I've noticed that that was not the case at all.

Firstly, I noticed that Isabella stares at me almost longingly when she believes I'm not watching.

Secondly, I noticed that she sometimes opens her mouth to speak to me but refrains from doing so which causes her to walk away.

Thirdly, because of the fact I've duly noted that she's making a conscious effort to show that she's not ignoring me and that she is okay tells me that she is not okay and has brought me to believe that she doesn't want to ignore me.

Fourthly, I've given it some thought and I've concluded that Isabella's mood has shifted ever since our kiss and and ever since Maria . And since the first situation directly included me and the second indirectly included me; I think I have the right to ask some questions and get some answers at least.

Overall, I'm therefore filled with this urge to just get her to sit down and spill whatever it is racing around in her mind and causing her to act like this, like something is telling me that I need to.

Also, her ignoring me means that there will unlikely be any more makeout sessions anytime soon and I can't let that happen, especially not when my entire body is tingling with need to have her close to me like that again.

That may be a little selfish but I honestly don't care anymore.

God, I've never been this desperate for someone in my entire life.

━

AUTHORS NOTE:

after 79 long, long chapters, chapter 80 is gonna FINALLY be the chapter you've all been waiting for etgdwhxusdjn

also guys i made this fake instagram post that i am kind of obsessed with LSMWOPAKOW