Chapter Twenty Nine

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Chapter Twenty Nine: Yes, I love you. 

" Good thing it was only a concussion, You don't have to worry anymore Jeon Jungkook sshi." 




" Thank you Doctor...." 


You could hear someone talking. But it was darkness you saw. You may lost the sense of seeing for now but your hearing and smelling senses were okay you smell the familiar scent of  alcohol and the cleaning solutions of the hospital. 

I am still here


 You tried to recall what just happened but nothing........




Your body was too heavy you could hardly move. slowly you found the courage and strength to open your eyes. Fluttering them open, your vision was a little blury but you found yourself lying in a hospital as expected.


Again.

The sudden bright light of the room felt uncomfortable as you felt the pain causing your eyelids hardly remain opened. instead of trying to sit up you lifted your head to see who was on your side but the sudden movement was a wrong thing to do.  

 The Pain throbbed so violently around your skull that you wondered why it didn't just crack open, you whined in pain and Jungkook finally noticed. 

" Y/N ah ? " His voice came quiet as a whisper as he and the doctor walked toward your bed. 

" Y/N sshi, You had a concussion. Try not to move your head for the moment." Another unfamiliar voice was heard and you assumed he was the doctor.

A concussion? 

" Y/N ah, Baby can you hear my voice ? " Jungkook asked again, this time you felt his hand holding yours.

Baby? 

The pain slowly faded so you opened your eyes again only to be welcomed by the face of the man you wanted the most, He was smiling at you but you could see the pain and concern.

" W-What happened ? " You asked while Jungkook helped you position yourself in the bed so you can look at him without having to move your head a lot.

" Rest for bit now, I will tell you everything later " He spoke in quiet tones as he sat by the edge of the bed next to you. " Everyone is okay and no one get hurt........well..... except for you " The man chuckled but you could almost hear the guilt in his voice, if guilt was even a heard-able feeling.  


" Umm ." You sighed in understanding " that's a relief ." 

After a long pause Jungkook stood up and faced the window " I am sorry Y/N.... It was all my fault."

You could detect guilt in his voice, and anger, but also concern which was what made your heart soften. 

" Was it true? " You said making the man turn to look at you, you continued " That you defended his father's killer, Is this the truth?" 

Jungkook sighed, It was a sigh so quiet that it went unnoticed but you definitely felt the hurt in his eyes . " Of course not." he replied right away " His father wasn't killed, It was an heart attack. I can't let a person be accused over a crime he didn't commit and if I wasn't confident and sure about this I wouldn't even accept the case." He explained wishing you'd understand. 

" So, It's not your fault." You said.

" Huh..."

" It's not your fault I said, You don't have to apologize." You told him in calm, unhurried voice.





Silence.





Awkwardness.





Fear. 







And two stupid human holding their emotions back..........





" I didn't only apologized for that." Jungkook broke the silence as he approached you staring at how you were avoiding meeting his gaze. " I have a lot of things to apologize for, to you and your parents...." 

You looked at him at the mention of your parents, You watched as he sat back next to you in the bed then as if was something he did a lot of time, he held your hand and began caressing very softly as if it was the most fragile and easily broken thing. " I told them everything....."

Your heart skipped a beat when he said that " What........"

" Don't worry, They aren't mad at you....." Jungkook looked down at your hand, smiling painfully when you didn't pull away. " It was my fault Y/N, Even if you say we both agreed It's still my fault. 

" No, It's not." You said under your breath suddenly forgetting everything that happened and only focused on the man next to you. 

" The thing we decided is a hard thing to believe, It's a decision we made while you were broken and your heart confused, making decisions while your heart is hurt and confused is basically 'drunk driving' your life. and ........I .......selfishly agreed." 

You followed his gaze to his hand, his hand was warm and the feeling seemed so perfect yet scary. 





I am gonna miss it.





" Jungkook...." You said softly then looked up into his eyes " You.......Y-You don't have to say all this if you want the divorce to happen now, I mean...... this is what we agreed to, right? " 



You felt like crying at this moment.



Jungkook furrows his eyebrows for a moment, then a wave of realization washes over his face when he knew what you meant. 

He sighed then looked down again " T-there's something I want to say.......would you hear me out? " 

You bite your lip and nodded. 

" I........I didn't h-have a normal c-childhood." Jungkook spelled out the words hardly, he never thought he'd speak about the matter again or those words will come out of his mouth but if he wants you to understand him he needs to be honest. " I ........w-was kidnapped when I was 4 and I w-wasn't rescued until I was nine.." 

Your eyes widened when he said that, You imagined a child of four being away from his family for six year, you imagined how scared and pain he might felt. Sadness drained through you rather than skating over your skin. 

 You waited for him to continue and you held his hand into yours when you felt the man next to you hesitating. 

I am right here. You said through your touch which he understood because he started to talk again. 

" I l-learned that the kidnapper was a man who lost his fiance in a car crash during his collage years, after that........... he decided not to have another relationship nor get married." He said the took a deep breath " But then..........when everyone around him left, either dead or started their own families, He became lonely.........The man then went crazy........Sick really." He paused and looked at you to make sure you were there listening to him, and you were there. " He kept me in his house....... called me son, locked me in the room for years, a room with no window or anything a child need and......... He'd beat me up, starve me and even threaten to kill me if I screamed or tried to escape." 

" That's......awful". 

Jungkook nodded " It's crazy .... the effect of being lonely." He sighed then looked at the nightstand next to you and kept his gaze fixed there, as if he was lost in deep thoughts, remembering every bad thing happened and recalling the long journey he went through. 

" Jungkook..." Your soft voice woke him up and he looked at you again, smiling....... sadness and pain were shown in his beautiful eyes as he stared at you.

" I have been scared of that ever since...." He said " Being lonely scared me, Y/N.......I w-was scared to grow to be the person he was."

" B-But you won't..."

" I didn't know that." he added " I spent the very first important years of a child's life learning how someone can turn to be if......... you know......"

He paused again and you didn't want to say anything just tightening the grip on his hand. 

" After I was rescued, I went to therapy of course but it only helped keeping me sane and not scared to talk or get out to play or to study..." he added " But...... I couldn't wait to grow up and find someone who'll promise not to leave me or keep me alone........ I met Yoongi and the others in college, Yoongi knew my story because his father was the officer handling my case back then." The was Jungkook smiled at the mention of his friends made your heart softened as well, feeling slightly relieved that he met them. " They used to date, having many girlfriends but I wasn't interested, ....which was weird for a handsome man like me. I thought if I did I will punished and not actually find The One " he chuckled when he noticed your smile at that. She agree. he thought. 

" Well...... I had a couple of girlfriends I won't lie but they freak out the second I start to talk about the future....... Maybe girls those days don't really believe someone like me being serious." he chuckled again remembering the embarrassment he felt during those days. " I was like that until Yoongi Hyung and the others lectured me, So I stopped and only cared about studying and shit .....Until I met Yuju in my father's company."

Your heart ached at that; you didn't want to hear her name while having a deep conversation but she was a big part of his life and not you nor anyone can deny that.

You sighed and kept listening.

" She somehow sounded nice, so we went out a couple of times then I proposed to her. " He nodded to himself " I felt she was the perfect person to marry and spend the rest of my life with, I thought she was the one, I said I love her and it was the right thing to do, i felt happiness, excitement and relief.. Proposing after a short period of time dating was strange but I thought ........ Why wait when I know what I want? and I wanted her...." 



This hurt.





It really does.







" But it turned out I didn't." The man said, Swallowing you looked up to me his eyes again, his beautiful irresistible eyes staring at you like you were holding the world inside. " We can have happiness, excitement and relief. Every emotion considered good. But what would we be if we didn't feel hurt, or pain, or despair?......... we can't have the good without the bad. There is no light without darkness. The trick is to balance them, so the bad doesn't seem so terrible, and we can truly appreciate the good.......We can understand many things........ I understood many things, many things as I have never knew Love until I met you, Y/N." 

" Y-You ......Love m-me? "

" Yes, I love you." 

 You breathed,looking into his eyes. It was like you wanted to say something more but stopped yourself. " I have always wanted to be with someone for the reason I told you just now, But never because I needed them, wanted them and missed them......  But I did for you, I I know I would defend you with my life even if the odds were insurmountable. I know I want to comfort you in the difficult and painful times. I would dance and rejoice with you when times are good. I know I will never betray you, never give up on you......... So yes, I think love you.........I know I love you...... I know I sound cliche or whatever but I have waited enough...... No more hiding my feelings, No more... " 

" Jungkook....."

" I don't care Y/N, I don't care if you don't feel the same or want to have divorce and leave........." He said clenching his jaw " If something or......someone makes you happy, I am ready to leave but..........I wish you don't, I really w---------"

" You were the one asking for divorce, Idiot." You smiled but tears started to fall, spilling down your face, You feel the muscles of your chin tremble like a small child and you looked at him, he was surprised, probably shocked at your reaction but didn't wait another second and hugged you, giving you all the love you wanted and receiving the love you had to give.  

It's raw, everything, raw tears, raw emotions. You can't stop... You can't stop. Why can I not stop crying?

" J-Jungkook......." You said 



" I am sorry Y/N, I am so sorry." He said over and over again " I never met what I said about the divorce, I am sorry I am an idiot true......" He sobbed into your chest unceasingly, hands clutching at your hospital gown. You held him in silence as his tears soaked your chest.

It was the first time you see him cry and it was the hardest thing ever, You don't want him to cry, you wanted him happy, teasing you, laughing at you even if it was getting mad at you but not crying.......

" J-Jungkook..... I f-feel dizzy." You told him and he pulled away immediately wipping his tears and looking at you in concern. 

" You okay? " He placed his hand in your cheek wipping your tears as well " I am sorry I totally forget what the doctor said.." He rubbed the back of his neck feeling guilty " We'll speak later, sleep now, alright? " 

You smiled and nodded slowly, he helped you lay down again and was about to stand up when you held his hand. 

" I Love you too. " 





Finally.





who knew such a sweet word is so hard to say.? 







Jungkook smiled and nodded, Only God knew how the man wanted to hold you in his arms and kiss your lips but he reminded himself that you were tired and sick. 







----------------------



Jungkook walked out the room with a smile in his face, heart racing like never before and a relief that could give him a total new life. 



" How is she ? " Jungkook turned when he heard Yoongi's voice.

" Oh Hyung.." Jungkook smiled " She's taking a rest now, I guess she needs some time to recover." 

" From that smile i think you.........." Yoongi smirked. 

Jungkook looked away embarrassed at the obvious smile in his face. " I told her......."

" Finally you picked up your balls, y--------"

" Everything." 

Yoongi paused when Jungkook cut his words. 

" I told her everything, Hyung.....Everything." Jungkook smiled and looked down " And....I like this feeling, I like it a lot . " 

Yoongi nodded. 

" Where's her parents ? " Jungkook asked after a paused. 

" Jungkook...." Yoongi patted on the younger's man shoulder " Don't expect them to let you take Y/N home any time soon, Her mom already said she prepared her room in their house."

" I......... I will take to them." Jungkook nodded " It's Y/N choice after all, If she said she wants to stay I have no words to say."





-------------------------------------------------

Two days later.

" Here Honey, take a seat...." Your mom walked you to the sofa and helped sit, You still feel dizzy each time you make a hard movement, the doctor said it's normal after a brain concussion and asked you to be careful while walking at least for a month. 

As you sat, you watch Jungkook standing by the door hesitating whether to come inside or stay there which made you chuckled then waved with your hand to him to come next to you.

Jungkook run toward you cutely and sat beside you avoiding your parents gaze " Thank you." he whispered to you.

" Mom, Dad please sit down." You looked up at them, they haven't talk about anything with you afraid you'll get more sick and they acted as if nothing happened not knowing that Jungkook already told you they knew " I want us to talk.."

" Y/N Dear...." Your mom said, begging you with her eyes to let the matter die but it's your life, and you had enough hiding your feelings and avoid saying what you want.

" Please Mom...." 

Your parents shared eye contact for a second then they nodded walking to sit in the sofa facing the two of you. 

You took a deep breath " First of all, I am sorry---" before you could finish what you wanted to say Jungkook stood up grabbing all the attention. 

Your eyes widened when he sat on his knees bowing respectfully to your parents. " It was all my fault." 

" J-Jungkook......"   

The man ignored you and kept kneeling " I don't deserve forgiveness but......... I hope you'll give me a second chance to take care of your daughter because........." He paused and looked at you " Because I love your daughter so much .... so much that it's scary to imagine her away from me."

You smiled at him then looked at your parents only to blush from embarrassment. 

" I really hope........ " Jungkook looked at them again. 

" What do you say Y/N? " Your father looked at you " Do you want to be with this jerk?" Your father smiled when he said the last word, you knew in that moment that he already forgave both of you and somehow he likes Jungkook so much. Maybe it has something to do with the accident that you don't remember and no one wanted to tell you about but you couldn't hide your happiness that finally the lying stopped and everyone you love is here happy and safe. 

" Yes Dad.." You nodded, cheeks burning up and heart beating so fast " I do.." 

Your mom clapped her hands smiling brightly " Now who wants my amazing lasagna? I made it before we came to the hospital....... But first let's take the table outside to enjoy lunch " she

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