Chapter 26

We transfer over to the Jotunn's personal shuttle.

Unlike the worn down, metal gray one we previously were in, their shuttle matches their suits. The outside and inside are crisp white, not a speck of dirt to be seen. Pristine, inside and out, the white having been perfectly preserved. I decide in that moment that I hate the color white. Unfortunate for me, I live in the Pure State, where there is only the color white. It does me no use to try and escape the bland color.

Their shuttle has more cars attached to it than the previous one, a total of five cars lining up behind the car that contains the cockpit. Our group separates, Willow and I going in the car that contains all the Warriors while Casper, Avery and Demetria are directed to the second to last car with five other Jotunn. There they will stay until our arrival in Fresno. As Willow and I shuffle into the car, the Jotunn behind me explains the difference between our run down shuttle and this shuttle.

"You see." Its gruff voice drawls on, "The shuttle you previously rode in is what we call a patrol shuttle. It is expendable, to say the least, which is why we let it run its course throughout all of Exitium. As long as there is track, the shuttle will go along it. We will reach Fresno in one to two days." He nods his helmeted head and sits down on a white, padded bench. "When we arrive, you will face the head Jotunn and give the story of your betrayal to him."

I simply nod, sitting beside the Warrior without another word said.

It feels weird to me, not being cuffed when Willow and the others are all cuffed, their white spheres sealed with my very own fingerprint. Yet I sit free, no confines on me and fully trusted by the Jotunn Warriors. I can't help but wonder why it's so believable to them that I betray my friends.

Everyone in our car sits in complete and total silence. Unfortunately for me, this gives me time to think, to dwell, to regret. My mind snaps to Eli towards the beginning of our trip over a month ago. I can't help but wonder if Eli will appear again as a Warrior now that he's dead. According to Calyx, when one dies, they become what they once feared—a Jotunn. That makes me think of Calyx and Diego and Ariel. My heart drops as Ariel comes to my mind. I don't think I will ever be able to forgive myself for Ariel's death. It feels as though I left a part of me behind when she died. I hardly knew her, but because she reminded me so much of my little sister it makes me feel as if I left a part of my heart with her.

I glance over to the silent Willow and without even making eye contact with me, she begins to speak.

Her voice is hushed and urgent, eyes bloodshot. "You do realize what is coming, Bay, don't you?" She croaks, shooting those bloodshot, gray eyes my direction. Her hair is matted in tangled knots and her glasses barely hang onto the end of her nose. I reach over and gently push them back onto the bridge of her nose before replying.

"What?" I ask, my voice a whisper. "What's coming?"

"You won't just tell your story to the head Jotunn, Bay." She tells me, shaking her head. "They will torture you to make sure they have the absolute truth. Nothing will satisfy them otherwise. You can't just play the part, you have to believe the role."

I sit back in silence and preen my fingers through my greasy hair. My emotions run wild and I'm unsure how I should feel. Scared? Regretful? Frustrated? Sad? Angry? My stomach churns and my nerves are evident, but the Warriors surrounding us don't seem to be paying attention, each lost in a conversation or in slumber. Some even play card games with each other. That in itself makes me feel sick to see these monsters behaving normally.

Who could say what the Jotunn would do to me when they found out I was lying all along.

+++

My head jerks as it falls from my palms and hits on my knees. I groan, realizing I dozed off briefly. I rub my eyes and glance over beside me to see Willow sound asleep. I get comfortable and begin to drift into sleep once more before hearing a commotion happening several cars down. I realize the voice yelling as that of Casper Bunk. I open my eyes once more and listen to the argument brewing.

"Pee!" He shouts. "I seriously need to pee. God, I've told you this at least eleven times now. Everyone does it, it's a bodily function!"

A small laugh escapes my lips but I quickly stifle it, remembering the role I portray.

"Who knows, maybe you did it in your past life." Casper pauses, "Well, actually, yeah, you did do it in your past life. These suits must have a catheter or something in them because you're clearly not understanding me."

"Pull over." A Jotunn sitting across from me says. "The human won't shut up until we do."

"I can't hold it any longer!" He whines. I'm sure he's doing the 'pee-pee' dance by now.

I remember when Evan and Ema would do that dance, how they would point their knees inwards and waddle. They wouldn't even know they were doing it, and they probably would've kept doing it had I not told them time and time again to go use the restroom. I wouldn't put it past Casper to use this dance for an extra effect.

"Alright, enough already." One Jotunn booms as the shuttle comes to a stop.

The same booming Jotunn barges over to where Willow and I sit. Its padded gloves grab Willow by the shoulders and toss her to the ground. What a rude wake-up call. Kindred's gray eyes snap wide open and a yelp leaves her lips as her body collides with the shuttle floor. She scrambles to her feet, a look of terror painted across her olive face.

"Pee break." The Warrior informs her, glancing over to me and motioning for me to stand, as well. I follow his commands and get to my feet, standing there in an awkward silence. The Jotunn opens one of the doors to the shuttle and lets us out to go and do our business.

I press my hand in between Willow's shoulder blades, forcing her out into the crisp winter air. A Warrior still stands guard over us, even though I supposedly betrayed my group. Perhaps they are here as reinforcements, in case any of the captives run, but nevertheless their beady eyes hidden beneath those damn helmets made me uncomfortable. I lead Willow to some nearby trees so we can do our business in privacy, our backs each facing one another's as we silently drop our pants to use the restroom. In that moment, I can definite-ly, without any regrets say that it must be nice to be a boy in this particular situation. It had to be nice to be able to pee standing up without removing articles of clothing.

As I zip up my pants and step out of the foliage, I can feel eyes on me. Not just any eyes—Casper's eyes. For a brief moment we make eye contact, his sad expression matching my own. I don't know what it is about the Nebraskan rebel, but he reminds me much of my father. Perhaps it was because Casper was raised partly in New York so he still had those traits about him. I can't quite put my finger on it, but Casper Bunk makes me feel at peace, he makes me feel like I'm at home. It's a comfort I love to have. Casper makes me want to forget everything I've ever learned from my home state and just fall. I just want to forget about my upbringing, how I am supposed to be pure and the standards I must meet, I want to forget and fall for the Nebraskan rebel who puts my mind at ease.

I look away from the young man and turn my attention to Willow, guiding her back into the car in the dead of the night, nothing but the chirping of crickets and the thoughts swirling around in my head to be heard.

+++

I feel wired, my eyes won't shut and my knees won't quit bouncing. My fingers wrap nervously against my kneecaps and I try to calm my brain down but nothing works. Everyone around me is out like a light, even the Jotunn. It has to be around one in the morning and my eyes refuse to shut, even though I feel tired and I know I'm tired. All I want is sleep, but my body refuses and fights that urge. My bottom lip curls inward and I gnaw on it furiously as I debate what I should do. My gut tells me to go talk to Casper while I still can, but my busy mind tells me to ignore that gut-feeling in case I should be caught.

I have always listened to my gut over my head, though, so I decide to talk to Casper. I stand slowly to my feet, being careful not to make any loud noises. I near the door that separates me from Casper, splitting the car in two. I look to the right of the door to see another keypad that requires a thumb print. I push air into my cheeks and release it smoothly as I try to come up with a solution. I look around the car and see a Jotunn asleep on the bench close to the keypad. I take a deep breath and ever so gently wrap my small hand around the large hand of the sleeping Warrior. Its hand barely reaches the keypad, but it's enough to scan its finger and grant me access to the next car. I breathe a sigh of relief and reposition the Jotunn's hand to where it originally was and cross the threshold into the next car.

As I stumble into his designated car, I realize he isn't asleep either. His green eyes stare right at me, wide in shock.

"Baylee you can't be here." He tells me, his voice a hushed whisper.

"I..." I don't know what I'm supposed to say? Something cliché, like I had to see you. I'm not a cheesy person, so I simply say what's on my mind. "I can't do this."

He sits up straighter in his chair, his slender index finger motioning me to come over to him.

Tears well in my eyes but I try to keep it together, trying to keep everything calm and quiet. I'm scared, I'm sure that is obvious not only to him, but to the others as well. If I am found out by the Warriors, what will they do with me? My head runs wild at the mere thought of what all could go wrong with our plan.

I kneel in front of him, tears streaming down my rosy cheeks. I feel like vomiting.

Casper's calloused fingers reach over and comb my curls behind my left ear, his voice soft and kind towards me as he speaks. "We wouldn't have made you do this if you weren't capable of following through." He whispers. "You can do this, Bay. I know you can. You just have to play their game."

"What if I can't, huh?" I whisper in a harsher tone then I mean too. "What if I'm meant to be a pawn in their game and I just don't know it? What if this is a part of their plan all along? They could easily be one step ahead of us, already." I shake my head and purse my lips. "How can you fool those who can't be fooled?"

"Do you trust me?"

"Bunk..."

"Do you trust me?" He repeats, his voice sterner than it was the first time he asked.

"You know I do." I sigh.

"Alright, Baylee Areaux Zachary, then all you have to do is listen to me and follow my instructions. I know you can fool them, okay? You're smart, smarter than you think and far braver than you could ever know, okay?"

"Okay." I whisper.

"Alright, so here's what we're gonna do."