Chapter 1

Background color
Font
Font size
Line height


Cover by thejessicamartin

TRIGGER WARNING: SELF HARM

I held my head low as I walked by the menacing stares. Every few feet I would walk, I would hear snickers from other people. I looked at them, and they laughed even more. Her eyes watered. Why was everyone so mean to her. One person stuck their leg outwards. I didn't see, and tripped over it.

I got up, and dusted myself. I heard everyone laughing. "That's what the ugly, weird girl deserves," they said.

During class, people would stare at me and whisper and giggle as I would bite on her pen to think, or do anything that wasn't robotic. Why did they bully me so much? I was just trying to learn.

At lunch, as I ate, I would sit by myself, with a thousand gazes on my back. They would snicker, and whisper. As I would doze off in my world, and laugh at something I randomly thought of, the people would whisper to each other that I was the world's biggest weirdo they'd probably ever seen.

Hey, it didn't stop at that. After lunch, during the next class, even the teacher's loved to pick on me.

"Hey, you weirdo in la la land," they would say, and then complain about ever little thing I would do wrong. And then they would whisper in the halls after school with other teachers about how weird the Lucie girl was. And so everyone treated me the same.

Weird. Weird Lucie. That was the perfect reason to bully me. The fact I was loving, caring, and quiet contributed more to the reason I was bullied. I never fought back.

At home, as I arrived, with a knife hidden under my sleeve - the new one I had impulsively bought, my mother saw me. I relaxed. Finally someone who would love me. Or at least was supposed to? She didn't say hi, or hug her. She glared at me instead. Then complained about how much of a nuisance I was in her life. How I never did what she wanted me to, even though I tried my best to be perfect, and how she would have just prefered it if I had died in her womb.

I walked up the stairs solemn. My dad never existed. He was a mystery. As said, I was a mistake.

As I reached my room, I slowly pulled out a sharply bladed pocket knife. I had just bought it on my way back from school. It was a guise of a science project. Really it was for something else.

Hmmm... how would I do it? How could I fulfill destroying myself , and end it all once and for all? Before anyone else could do any more damage? 

An idea flickered in my head,  and as impulsively as I thought it, I glanced down at the pocketknife I bought earlier resting in my hands.

Thought I'd done this a few times before, today would be different.

Today would be it.

As the emotions washed over me, I started the knife towards my fleshy skin, and watched as my emotions of self-repulsion and disgust splayed themselves across my arms.

I continued with several more slashes up and down both of my wrists, with every cut feeling more and more uplifting.

Finally, as my vision blurred with tears, I heaved a heavy sight of relief, as I finally let myself get consumed by the darkness.

Press the star button if you enjoyed. :)

You are reading the story above: TeenFic.Net