Part Three: Doctorate In Anxiety

Ray's POV

Andy was over the moon. He had started packing and moving things into "our" house already but not before phoning almost every person we know and telling them about the wedding and the baby.

In amongst all this was the court case against Tamar. We all testified as to what happened that day and,as a result,Tamar was sentenced to life in an asylum for psychotic criminals.

During this time Andy was looking for a gynae in an area where paparazzi wouldn't be hanging around or stalking us. We had our first checkup appointment with Dr. Abigail Chen tomorrow but it preoccupied Andy as he worried about my anxiety disorder and how I'd be able to treat it throughout the pregnancy. We were still both slightly traumatized by the events that occurred a few months back and rehashing them in court made the memories surface more. We both were a little jumpy for a few days after the trial and verdict.

I could feel my fitness wanning so, as an alternative to my usual fitness routine of putting myself through four hour sessions of highly complex dance, I took up Yoga and Pilates. When Andy saw what Pilates involved, he pulled rank and I had to replace it with spinning.

Today, Andy had committed himself to bringing the last few boxes from my apartment and the house and my Hummer was parked neatly next to my bike and Maybach - I was no longer allowed to ride my bike as Andy thought it would be dangerous but how much safer would a Maybach or Hummer be?

I heard his keys in the door followed by his call of: "Honey, Baby James, daddies home!"

I couldn't help but smile at his enthusiasm at being a father. He put down the boxes he had in his arms then came and rubbed the tiny, almost non-existent bump and kissed my forehead.

"That's the last of your stuff Honey, I haven't done your studio because you'll still be working from there if you want to work. If you want to be a stay at home mom, I'm fine with that too. While we're talking big decisions, I have one I've been meaning to ask if you've thought about."

Truth be told, I had tried not to do too much thinking about anything that wasn't baby or wedding related. I nodded as a green light for him to ask me what he wanted to know.

"When we're married, are you keeping your last name or doing the hyphenated thing? If you want to hyphenate it, the babies going to have to have the hyphenated last name too, so I was just wondering what your plans were?"

I was taken aback. He didn't even mention the option of me taking his surname like a normal, married couple would. I usually would have kept quiet but I think my hormones got the better of me.

"I have thought about it, and I was planning on taking your last name and the baby having your last name too but it seems like that's not an option."

He smiled so broadly I thought he looked slightly idiotic.

"I wanted to ask you to take my last name but I thought I shouldn't be selfish and at least give you options. Gosh I can't believe you want to be Mrs. James!"

Again, I couldn't help but smile at his enthusiasm and joy over something so simple.

"Honey, how are we on the wedding?"

I sighed, it was a lot of work throwing a decent wedding together but I was managing it well.

"I've booked dress fittings and I have in mind my bridesmaids - they just don't know yet. Also, Joe can't be a groomsman but he's going to be up there." I finished with a wink.

Andy laughed, "I think I may know why. You two are like, best friends."

"Speaking of best friends, there's no time like the present. Let me call Nikita and Crystal and ask them about leave from work and to be my bridesmaids."

"Don't forget about them being aunties too. Do you want some privacy or can I stay?"

I patted the couch next to me, signalling him to stay. They had last been here about a year ago; Andy and I were already together so they'd met. Kita and Crys were the only ones who knew how to contact me or who I was and how I'd changed my identity. They'd been my closest friends for a decade and I loved them dearly.

I hit dial on voice call first to make sure it was okay to video call.

"If it isn't my favorite undercover diva!" Rang Kita's voice.

"Hey nunu, are you with Crys and can you take a video call?"

"Sure thing. I'll wait."

I looked at Andy who had his tablet ready to go.

Hitting video call this time, it wasn't long before the two most beautiful and amazing women I knew were smiling back at me!

"Look at you baby! All glowing and isht! Hey Andy! Now, is this a serious issue video call or a just because video call.

I breathed in deeply and started.

"Can you guys take like, a month of leave?"

They both nodded.

"Are your passports still valid?"

Again, nods.

"That's great because June14th..."

Instead of telling them we were getting married I showed them the ring. This was followed by instant screaming and "OMG's!"

Crys spoke first: "Damn girl I can't believe you finally taking that step! I'm so proud of you!"

Andy laughed. "Ladies, there's more but I want to be the first one to call you Aunty Crys and Aunty Kita before this little one does." He rubbed my tummy making sure they got the point.

Again, more screaming and jumping ensued. It was amazing seeing them so happy. We arranged dates and Andy said he'd book their tickets in the morning and the girls wished them well again before saying their goodbyes.

"My turn," Andy stated.

He Video conferenced the whole band and after getting the formalities of greeting out of the way, Andy got straight to it.

"So Nick, would you be my best man? Trev, my groomsman?"

"Hell yeah! Your bachelor's party will be epic!" Nick replied excitedly.

Trevor was just as excited. "Whoop whoop! Like you had to ask!"

Joe looked a little left out. Andy turned the tablet so it showed both of us now clearly.

"Joe, Ray has something to ask you though."

He looked surprised by this and said, "Sure, what's wrong Bear?"

"Joe, you are the closest thing to family apart from Andy I've had here."

Nick shouted: "Hey, that's not fair! What about me?"

"Shut it Nick, this is serious. Joe, would you be the one who gives me away at the wedding?"

His eyes teared slightly but I wouldn't call him on it in front of the guys.

"Of course Bear. It would be my greatest honor." I wished I could get a hug from him but placed my fingers to my lips then the screen as a substitute. He did the same.

Trevor piped in then, "Is Tanya going to be one of the bridesmaids?"

That was an awkward question, how did I approach it without sounding like a bitch?

"Well, we only really have the two groomsmen and my two best friends from South Africa are flying in for the wedding so you and Nick would be escourting them down the aisle."

He looked upset at this. "You can't keep excluding her from everything. She notices it and it's starting to hurt her feelings that you guys never give her a chance."

"You know what Nick, you're right. Baby, you can get Kellan to be a groomsman too? He can walk down the aisle with Kita."

Trevor beamed at this. "Thanks so much Ray, give her a call please, it will mean so much when you call and ask her!"

We said our goodnights and Andy started on supper while I took a shower. The night had ended so beautifully.

Before settling down, I made a lunch date with Tanya for the day after tomorrow. She seemed surprised but agreed enthusiastically. Sacharine sweet was not my flavor.

We ate our supper watching a DVD set of The Muppet Show because we both loved it and watched until we both felt sleepy.

"Come on Andy, let's hit bed." He agreed and a few minutes later he and I were in our respective pyjamas with teeth brushed. Before switching the bedside light off, Andy reached under my shirt and bent to kiss my stomach.

"Goodnight Baby James, tomorrow mommy and daddy get to meet you. Well, kind of."

Tanya's POV

My phone rang with a number I didn't recognise. I answered generically.

"Tanya speaking."

"Hey Tanya, it's Raymeera. I don't know if you remember me? I had supper with you and Nick a few weeks back."

My smile beamed. This meant my plan was working. I had pulled a sad sob story on how left out I felt but Ray was included in everything.

"Of course I remember you sweety! I asked Trevi about you the other day and he told me the good news about you and your fiancee getting back together and a little one on the way! Congratulations! So, so happy for you."

I blanched at my own fakeness but I needed to keep this up until I could finally end this all. I hated all of them, even that idiot Trevor I had to pretend to be gaga over. Most importantly, I hated Nick, Ray and Andy.

"So Tanya, I was thinking you and I could do lunch at Yan's day after tomorrow. I have something I would like to ask you."

"Sure sweety, I will meet you there at 12. You take care of baby now, alright? Bye!"

Thank God, that conversation lasted too long. I wonder what she wanted to ask? I went to my room and got out a digital camera I always kept hidden. As I scrolled through the pictures, tears started running down my eyes. I got up and cut myself a line of coke to calm down, fixed my make-up and composed myself.

I had a date with Trevor and as much as he annoyed me, I needed  this in with the band to get my justice.

Andy's POV

I woke to the sound of my alarm blaring and was trying to figure out why I had set an alarm, sitting bolt upright when I remembered today was the day of our first checkup with the gynae!

Ray got up in what I called her "Zombie mode."

"Need a Coca Cola - sugar, caffeine, nicotine."

We walked down into the kitchen where she gulped down her Cola and lit a smoke. I was keeping watch of her more lately, knowing that the cutting, nicotine, alcohol and drugs she had taken when she was unknowingly pregnant might play a role in the babies development.

Halfway through her smoke, I interrupted her. "Honey, why don't we try bouncing a smoke between us so we can try and get you to cut down?"

The look on her face said: "Are you for real?!?" but Raymeera was nothing if not dedicated to me and to our baby so she dutifully handed the cigarette over.

"Anyone else James and I would've punched them in their faces."

I laughed and kissed the top of her head. "I don't doubt that for a second Honey. I love you. Come on, let's go."

As we drove, I took the chance to ask about something that had been bugging me for a while but I didn't want to rock the boat, so I had left it alone.

"Honey, a while ago when you were getting dressed I noticed that you have an "A" and "J" scar in the same place Tamar put mine. What was going through your head when you did that?"

She sighed. "You noticed that, huh? I was very drunk, high, heartbroken and Twitter stalking you at the time when I saw how many selfies you had of us in happy times and how lately all you had tweeted about was losing love and missing out on your life because of a moment of insecurity, which broke my heart even more. Before I knew it I had done it and was in the bathroom blubbering like a child."

I pulled the car to a stop outside the Doctors Rooms and took her hand in mine. "After our baby is born, ur going for laser surgery to have those scars removed and if you want to, you can replace them with tattoos."

She beams widely and I go to open her door (a year and five months later I still opened her door for her.) We walked in just in time to hear "Mr. and Mrs James" being called. Ray laughs at this and says "Not yet, but that's us. Pleased to meet you Dr. Chen. Thank you for understanding our need for privacy."

The Doctor playfully swats Ray's hand. "Call me Dr. Abby, now, up on the table so you two can meet baby James!"

Soon I was crying, that was my baby. It was still tiny but it was most definitely a baby. Ray was 2 weeks further than what we initially thought which didn't surprise me because she was a forgetful person in general and had skipped her birth control before.

I didn't care. This was the woman I love and we were going to be married soon and this was our child. I started crying again. "Dr. Abby, can I have a moment alone with my fiancee and child?" She nodded obligingly.

"Hey Baby James, I'm your daddy, and this beautiful woman here is your mommy and we are going to be the best parents ever. Just you wait and see."

I wiped off the sonar gel on Ray's tummy and Dr. Abby rejoined us with a prescription for a replacement anxiety treatment and list of vitamins as well as our return dates for visits. Once a month until the final month, then every week.

We left the doctors room beaming when I heard Ray's text tone go off. She smiled slyly, "Baby can I go to the hair dresser?"

I assumed the text was from Kita or Crys. They always had the same hairstyles.

Two hours later, after me eating a sushi buffet at Yan's and doing some light shopping, I stopped outside the hair dresser.

Out the doors emerged a Ray with the same bleach blonde hair I had but with brunette highlights and Ombre tips. She looked vivacious and good enough to eat and that's exactly what I planned on doing when I got this woman home.

Sure enough, when we got into the house i wrapped my arms around her waist and whispered into her neck. "You are going to be such a milf, you know that?"

She quickly caught onto my drift and sauntered towards the bedroom and I noticed her jeans, then panties, thn shirt and lastly her bra, marking a trail to our closed bedroom. I knocked and she asked who was there. Obviously, she knew it was me but wanted to draw it out.

"Oh, I'm Andrew. I'm looking for my fiaance and mother of my child. Don't know if you've seen her maybe? Short with long blonde hair and brown streaks with ombre tips, set of luscious lips?"

She giggled from inside and said, "Well Andrew, I might just know something about this woman. Why don't you come on in?"

I opened the door and was lying on the bed with a blanket drapped strategically over her body, leaving quite a bit of her olive toned skin on display.

I went in and devoured her just as I had originally planned

Ray's POV

I had just pulled into the parking lot at Yan's where I knew my usual reserved spot would be held. Yan knew about the baby so made me chinese substitues for sushi. God, how I missed raw fish.

Tanya was sitting in the table reserved for me. She always looked so perky and bright-eyed. It was almost disturbing to a person like me. She jumped up and wrapped me in a hug and kissed both cheeks as though we were best friends.

"Hey sweety, I am so glad we finally get to have some girls time! Isn't is just so overdue? How was the first scan yesterday? How are you feeling?"

I explained everything was fine with the baby and that I was struggling a bit with morning sickness and she gave me a few old-wives remedies I said I would try. As soon as the food arrived and the general chit-chat was out of the way, I delved straight into the reason behind the lunch.

"So Tanya, the reason I asked you to lunch today was because there's something I wanted to ask you to do for me."

"Sure sweety, I hope nothing's wrong?"

Again, her concern seemed put on but sometimes you just got people who were like that.

"Well, Nick, Trevor and Kellan are all going to be groomsmen at mine and Andy's wedding but that leaves me one bridesmaid short so I wanted to know if you would be a bridesmaid at my wedding? I need to send your measurements today to my friend in South Africa who's going to be designing the dresses if you agree."

Her reaction was over the top. She squeeled and ran over to me and kissed my cheek. "Of course sweety! I can't believe you would ask me! I am over the moon! Let me text you my measures right now so you can forward them on!"

We finished our meals and parted with another exaggerated hugging and kissing session. There was just something about Tanya that didn't sit well with me.