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you awoke with a start, something tickling your neck. you scrunched your nose, weakly swatting your hands around the back of your neck. it already felt comfortable, so why did you wake up from such mere distraction?

you tried to sit up, but something was immobilizing you. your squinting eyes met the futon on the floor, and there you realized that you crawled into xiao's bed last night, because it was 'cold'.

you pouted, before glancing at your back and looked at him. he just looked adorable. very adorable.

his arms were wrapped around your torso and his legs were wrapped around over yours, immobilizing you. his grip was so tight that it felt as if a koala was clinging on you.

he was steadily but slowly breathing, his cheek pressed against your back. you couldn't help but break out into a fond smile. i mean, look at this boy. he's too precious.

you tried not to move for a few minutes, as you just let him sleep. but soon enough, the position you were both in made you feel uncomfortable so you tried moving to ease the space around the two of you.

"don't..." he mumbled unconsciously, his grip tightening on you. you just sighed, before forcefully turning yourself to the other direction to face him.

he still didn't wake up, but instead, he kept his grip on you and snuggled his head under your chin, his messy hair tickling your nose.

this side of him was absolutely adorable. it made your heart flutter. thinking about how thankful you were for his existence, he suddenly shifted in his place, snapping you out of your trance.

what were you thinking? he was supposed to be just a friend. you only met him weeks ago, you can't catch feelings this easily.

or can you?

"i- w-why are you here...?"

the male stared at you with his sleepy cat-like amber eyes, his deep, raspy morning voice ringing through your ears. you stated back, before your face slowly turned red from embarrassment.

"i-i don't know?" you nervously stammered, stumbling along your words. his deep voice hit you hard, it whacked your heart like a sledgehammer. you felt feelings for the boy run through your heart. he suddenly backed off, keeping a reasonable amount of space between the two of you.

"did i do anything weird?" he said, running his fingers through his hair. his eyes were blinking sleepily. your face turned red because his face was still too close.

"what? no, but you did have a nightmare... i woke you up because... u-uh..." your voice trailed off when you noticed that he abruptly turned away from you, and buried himself under the blankets.

"er, xiao?"

"please delete my existence from this universe." he muttered under his breath, his back facing you.

you bit your lip, trying to stop yourself from giggling. is this him being embarrassed?

"no, it's okay. you're cute when you're clingy." you added the last part to tease him, and it sure did make him embarrassed. you were grinning behind him, and it's as if all your embarrassment was transfered onto him.

he harshly pulled off the blanket from you, before glaring at you intensely. "it's not." his face was red, as he tried to hide it from your suspecting, teasing gaze.

"okay, mr. grumpy pants. how was your sleep? did you have a dream? how was it?" you enunciated cherfully, staring at his back.

"horrible."

"because of the nightmare? do you always have nightmares?"

silence overtook the room, and somehow xiao was tense. so you patted his shoulder gently, your arms reaching out to him. he flinched from the contact. he was honestly irked because of all your questions, but you weren't wrong.

"is that a yes...?" you softly whispered, before moving your hands to his hair and brushing it with your fingers.

"...and? what are you gonna do about it?" he whispered under the blanket, his voice muffled.

you kept silent and continued patting his head, his soft hair flowing along your fingers. maybe affection helps, who knows?

"disgusting," he shuddered, curling up under the blanket. you pulled your hand away wistfully, the soft feeling of his silky, fluffy hair disappearing from your fingers. you heard him sigh heavily, but he suddenly spoke,

"...do it again."

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you were now cooking pancakes in his place, and you couldn't help but think about xiao. currently, you gave him space and let him stay in bed since he still seems unwell about the nightmare thing.

you absentmindedly flipped the pancakes, almost dropping the spatula when a realization hit you.

if he lives alone, and he always has nightmares, who comforts him at night? does he always suffer with it alone?

a wave of sadness hits your heart, thinking on how did the poor boy live like this, with only one inconsistent friend too.

and there you felt the desire to take care of the boy, and comfort him as much as you can. he made your life much lively, and not to mention he helped you do homework that honestly gave a lot much more free time for you. you wanted to drown him with affection that he really deserved.

deep inside, he means so much to you.

after turning off the stove, xiao suddenly appeared, his hair sticking up. he padded his bare feet against the floor, approaching the fridge to get a glass of water.

"morning, xiao. do you feel better?" you smiled at him cheerfully, placing down the plate on the dining table.

"mm." he hummed, before placing down the empty glass on the counter. his eyes seemed distracted as it stared blankly on the crystal clear pitcher of water.

you both sat down in silence, eating breakfast quietly. only the clanking of the cutlery and the slight drip of the water faucet can be heard, as you both drown in your own deep thoughts. the atmosphere was tense, and it somehow made you feel uneasy.

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winter was nearing, and it felt tremendously cold even while wearing thick clothing. you were currently rereading your notes with xiao, but your mind was drifting off.

you were internally trying to convince yourself that you don't like him, and that you only see him as your best friend. it was as if your heart and brain was not aligned, and so you glanced at xiao.

he was peacefully reading, his hands hidden inside his long sleeves. the sight almost made you grin on the spot, but again, you tried to convince yourself that you don't like him.

your brain suddenly thought that, what if you were in a relationship with him?

unwanted thoughts suddenly flew inside your brain, making your face turn a bright shade of red while you try to snap yourself back into reality.

you had a mini heart attack, everything suddenly coming to a halt when you felt his two hands lightly slap you on both sides of your cheeks.

"you're not listening." he said in a sharp tone, your face overheating from the contact. if it was possible, your face was a super bright shade that you thought you suddenly turned into a living primary color.

he pulled away his hands, sighing. "you need to be more attentive."

you sat frozen on your seat, your face almost exploding. you shook your head, trying to snap out of it and calm down.

"okay, okay. i'll listen." you blinked, staring at the book in front of you. and there you both continued reviewing for the future task.

even if it was just mostly xiao scolding and teaching you, while you get confused and forget everything.

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