21. Dating in the dark park

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How to wake up at midnight without setting an alarm-clock and consequently waking your parents and starting an inquisition as to why you wanted to wake up at midnight in the first place – that is a conundrum with which, I think, not many teenage girls are faced on the night of their first date.

In the end, I just decided to stay up. Even if I would be dead on my feet when I reached the Golden Gate Park, at least I would be there and not in my bed snoring, and Giacomo could hold me in his arms while I slept. That thought actually did a pretty good job keeping me awake while I lay in the dark, my heart hammering in anticipation. I wished I could have read to distract myself. But my dad frequently had to relieve his overactive bladder in the middle of the night, and if on his way to the bathroom he saw light in my room at this hour, all hell would break loose.

The glowing digits on my clock changed incredibly slow. Slower even than Cathy in a high-prized boutique. Finally, they showed 11:00 pm. Time to consider my next conundrum: How to get out of the house without anybody noticing? My eyes drifted to the window and the fire escape behind it. Sure, I had fantasized often enough about going somewhere without Cathy or my parents or anyone knowing. But fantasizing about something and actually doing it were two very different things – at least for me. I was no Jen. And yet, the fire escape stood there, so tempting...

I jumped up from my bed and winced as my foot landed on a squeaking floorboard. For a few moments I stood there, listening. No sound suggested that I'd woken my parents or, God forbid, my sister. So I grabbed my backpack from the chair it sat on, slung it over my back and opened the window. Luckily, it didn't squeak. My mother, conscientious housewife that she was, had oiled it only yesterday. How nice of you, mom. Thank you so very much.

Before I could think better of it, I slid through the window out onto the fire escape. Shivering, I stood in the dark staring up at the stars.

It was a cold, clear night, cold as they often were here in sunny California. I'd once asked Sandra why that was, and she said it was because there was little vegetation to store the warmth of the sun. Wow. I hadn't known that trees could be so hot. And I still didn't quite believe it. Whatever the reason for the cold was, it wasn't nice. I briefly considered taking a jacket. But they all were one floor down in the big family wardrobe and I didn't want to risk going downstairs. There were a lot more squeaky floorboards around.

Teeth chattering, I crossed my arms in front of my chest, to hold the warmth in. Why couldn't my parents have moved into a new apartment building instead of this old monster with its squeaky floorboards and piece-of-junk elevators? O, what the hell. I would have to reach the Golden Gate Park without a jacket, and without freezing, and without losing my way, and without my parents finding out and grounding me for the next fifty years. No problemo.

I stared at the glowing lights of the Golden Gate Bridge in the distance. All I would have to do is walk in that direction, and sooner or later, I would end up in the Golden Gate Park. That didn't sound difficult, did it? Even I should be able to manage walking in a straight line. So why were my knees wobbling?

Probably because it was dark. And I was alone. And I was about to do something that I had never ever done before. Something that might change my life forever. Something stupid. It really would be smarter to turn back, go back into bed and forget all about this guy whose name started with G. All that I knew about him made it clear to me that we two – we weren't meant for each other. He was too old, too foreign, too broke, too everything. And the things I didn't know about him served only to support that fact. I really should turn around now. Immediately.

I started down the stairs. The farther I came, the faster I ran. I had a date! A date with Giacomo!

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Never before had I been out in the city by night. It wasn't nearly as dark as I'd imagined it would be. Sure, I'd seen all the city lights from my window hundreds of times – but I never imagined where all this glitter came from. Down here I could see that it came from the windows of hundreds of small houses, from the blinking advertisements of the occasional little shop, from bright street lamps and from cars that passed me by now and then.

I had never walked to the park from this direction before. Actually, I'd only ever walked there once before. My heart jumped at the memory of this particular day. Not that there was any particular reason for me to be nervous. I could see that this was a nice neighborhood – by day. I imagined the parked cars glinting in the sunlight, children playing on the small pieces of lawn outside the little houses. By night, only a few people were about, and in the darkness none of them looked like somebody I would want to be acquainted with.

There were the lights, too, I reminded myself. There was no need to be scared. There were lights everywhere.

And strangely, that made everything more scary. Because between the lights, the shadows, intensified by the stark contrast, turned into utter darkness. When I was about to pass by the first dark alley, I paused, fearing that as earlier today, a hand would reach out to grab me – only that this hand would not have quite as benevolent intentions. Suddenly, I wished I had Jen with me. Then I remembered where I was going and whom I was going to meet and instantly forgot that wish. No, Jen should definitely not be with me. She wouldn't stop laughing and teasing me until new year!

Finally, I stepped out from between the houses. On the other side of the street, tall trees threw their shadows in my direction. I took a deep breath, looked first left, then right, if any cars were coming – hey, I was sneaking out in the middle of the night for a secret date with a dangerous derelict, but I wasn't totally irresponsible – and crossed the street. On the other side, the darkness of the trees enveloped me. I could hear sounds I never thought to hear in the city: owls hooting, leaves rustling, squirrels squirreling, or whatever it's called. Up ahead, I could see faint light. Not the light of a street lamp, no, but the clear, white light of the moon. “Giacomo?” I whispered. No answer. The light drew closer. I could see a sign erected beside a big oak. In the light of the moon, I could clearly read the message it proudly proclaimed:

WELCOME TO THE GOLDEN GATE PARK!

Lose yourself in one of the largest city parks in the United States of America. Plentiful wildlife and a beautiful scenery guarantee a unique recreational experience.

Lose yourself. Check. Unique recreational experience? Not quite. Oh ha, ha. Fantastic. Meet me in the Golden Gate Park. Sure, Mister, nothing simpler than that. And where exactly in this, one of the largest parks of the US of A?

I said a very bad word I'd picked up from Jen and continued stomping through the darkness. I didn't get more than 10 feet before my locks caught on a branch. Fuming, I stopped and tried to untangle them.

“Stupid, stupid, stupid,” I muttered.

“Regretting your date before it has even started?” a soft, deep voice came from the darkness. My head snapped up – which wasn't such a good idea considering that my hair was still attached to a stubborn piece of foliage.

“Ouch!”

“Angela? Is everything all right?”

“I'm okay. It's just my stupid hair, I...” Before I could finish the sentence, he was at my side, his hands carefully untangling and stroking my hair. I made a mental note to myself about the usefulness of foliage.

“Don't call your hair stupid”, he said in his soft voice. I the dim light of the moon I could hardly make out his face, but I liked what I saw of it.

“Why not?” I asked breathless. “All it ever does is get caught on things.”

“No.” His hands, finished with setting me free, didn't stop stroking my hair. Softly. And maybe, maybe tenderly... “There's another thing it does. It shines like gold in the sunlight, and like silver in the moonlight. It is beautiful.”

I bit my lip and looked down, blushing. But inside, I was floating on air. “How do you know what gold looks like?” I mumbled.

He laughed softly. “You're right. It wasn't a good comparison.” His fingers were suddenly at my chin, coaxing it up. “It is much more beautiful than gold. Gold is cold. You aren't.”

Out of the darkness, I could see his face drifting closer. Oh yes.... On the lips, on the lips please...

Suddenly, he frowned, looking from left to right.

“You came alone?”

“Of course.” I smiled. “There's no one here but us.” So you can get a move on now and kiss me. Kiss me!

He did not, however, say something like 'How wonderful! Now I can show you the full extent of the passion I feel for you!' and envelop me into his strong, manly arms, or something similar. Instead, he straightened and looked down and me, seemingly horror-struck.

“You came here alone? The whole way? You walked through the city without any protection in the middle of the night?”

“Did you want me to come with parental supervision?” I smirked. “You know, I somehow think that would have ruined the whole nobody-is-supposed-to-know-thing. Although that's just my opinion.”

“No, of course I didn't want you to tell your parents, but...”

He looked truly disturbed, as though the possibility of me showing up alone had truly never occurred to him. Strange. What had he thought I'd do?

“Don't worry”, I teased. “Next time I'll show up with my bodyguard.”

He looked relieved. “That would probably be best.”

“Hello? Giacomo, that was a joke.”

“Oh.” A frown spread across his perfect forehead. “Sono spiacente, but Angela... I don't see what is amusing about that.”

“The fact that I am a fourteen-year-old schoolgirl and don't have a bodyguard, maybe?”

“You don't?”

“No, of course not.”

His frown deepened. “But why did you say you were going to bring one if you don't have one?”

“To make a joke. God!” I rolled my eyes. “You Italians really are strange. You need to get used to our sense of humor, and fast.”

“I agree with that”, he said, drawing me closer, his frown replaced by a smile. “But I don't think I could ever find anything funny about you not being safe.” Bending down towards my ear, he whispered, his voice sounding pained: “Angela, I never dreamed that you planned to come alone! If I'd known, I would never have never suggested to meet here. It was incredibly dangerous to walk through half the city in the middle of the night! You shouldn't have done that.”

I was truly touched by his concern for me, and that said something. If my parents had acted overprotective like that, I would have thrown a fit or two. With Giacomo, it just made me feel safe and warm inside – which probably had something to do with the way his lips, unintentionally or not, I didn't know, caressed my ear as he spoke. “Relax,” I giggled. “This is San Francisco, not Baghdad. What could possibly have happened?”

I meant it as a rhetorical question – but his expression made clear that he did not take it as such.

“I don't want to imagine”, he said. “Promise me something, okay?”

“Whatever you want.” The words were out before my conscious mind had even thought them.

“Promise me that you'll wait for me at your house from now on. I'll come and get you when it is dark, but don't go by yourself.”

I smiled. “So I get to spend even more time with you? Of course!”

“Thank you.” And finally, he drew me into him. He bent down, while I stood on my tiptoes. His arms encircled me and for the first time I could feel myself being pressed against the length of him. I could feel the hard muscles of his arms around me, his fingers stroking my back. I could feel my legs pressing against his. I could feel his hair softly brushing my face and his breath on my face. The perfect moment for a beautiful kiss – if I had not also felt something else.

Slowly, I raised one of my hands and felt his chest, or rather the cold, hard material that covered it under his clothing.

“Giacomo,” I said, frowning up at him, “Why do you wear a toilet seat under your shirt?”

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