Chapter 42: (Ryder's POV)

Seeing her with Jeremy, while he sat next to her in bed, crushed me. Yes, I was furious and wanted to beat the shit out of him but she was there too and she wouldn't want that. Ever. Is it actually possible that they're gonna be going out soon? Maybe they already are? Oh god, I can't let that happen. If he gets too long with her, he'll make her fall, manipulate her into doing things that will be pure torture to herself and then he'll break her heart. Way worse than I ever could. Only if she ever really loves him as much as she loved me. She told me a long time ago that she was convinced that we're soul mates. That we'll never leave each other and if we do, we'll never be able to stay away. And so far, it's been true. 

"What the hell was up with Jeremy? Since when did he gain the attitude?" Ethan asked confused as he sat on the chair at my desk while I sat at the foot of my bed with my head in my hands. "I have no fucking clue. He's always been an arrogant and disrespectful asshat, I just can't wrap my head around the fact that she let him in and that she can't see through the fake ass facade he puts on." I groaned in frustration.

"I don't think so man. I think she knows but I think she's about to do something to get you back and I think she's using Jeremy for it. And I think he'll use it to his benefit." Ethan huffed, looking up at my ceiling. I can't do this. Why did I break up with her over something so small too? We can't trust each other. Seriously? "I fucking miss her bro. Why did I fuck up this bad?" I rubbed my eyes. "Couldn't tell ya." he shook his head at me in disappointment. "I just know this isn't gonna do anything to you two. You'll get back together in no time, Ryder. Just start trying to get her back because it's killing you already and it's only been a day." he sighed, spinning in the chair like a child.

"Should I have left her alone tonight? It's still thundering you know. She's probably trying to sleep but can't." Just as I said that, I heard loud thundering, followed by Mia screaming and then her grunting out loud, "For God's sake! Fuck me!" she yelled exasperated, making me and Ethan look at her through the window as she threw the blanket off of herself as went out of her room and I'm assuming down the stairs. "Go bro. Just crash on the couch so she falls asleep. I wanted to go see Grace anyway." Ethan said as he got up and grabbed his things, getting ready to leave. "You really like her don't you?" I asked him since I already knew the answer. We all did. 

"Yeah, I do. I'm gonna ask her on a date soon. Mia told me how to do it." he said before we said bye and headed out. I locked the door behind me and walked over to Mia's. I probably should have brought an umbrella since I was gonna have to walk to her house. Well, who cares? I stepped into my driveway and was drenched in 0.2 seconds. Well, let's just hope she still has an extra set of clothes of mine. I walked over and rang the doorbell. She slowly opened the door, sticking her head out and sighing in relief once realizing it was just me. "Did you forget something?" she asked confused as she opened the door and stepped aside, letting me in. "Nope. I just heard you scream." I asked, making her very confused.

"When did I scream?" she asked confused as we walked up and into her room. She literally just yelled and doesn't remember? "You know... When you yelled fuck me!" I teased smirkingly, making her throw a towel at me.

"Dry yourself off, I'll leave a set of clothes for you in the bathroom." she said before pushing me into the bathroom. I dried myself off and was standing in shirtless, waiting for her to drop the clothes in.

She knocked, and slowly opened the door and reached her hand in and left the clothes on the counter. Before she could retract her hand, I grabbed her hand, pulling her into the bathroom, making her gasp. "What are you doing?" she asked, breathing a little heavily.

"Nothing." I smirked before I grabbed her by the waist and put her in the shower, turning it on, getting her soaked, head to toe. And a glare make its way to her face. "What the hell was that for?" she asked before I slipped out of her room and grabbed her some spare clothes to change into. "Just felt like annoying you." I shrugged casually, making her glare harden.

"You can change in my room." she said, before taking her clothes, throwing mine at me and closing the bathroom door. I quickly threw my clothes on and sneaked into the bathroom when I knew it was enough time for her to get dressed. When I walked in, she had her shorts on but was in her bra. Oh my god, this girl is beautiful. I stood by the sink before she walked backwards and crashed into me. She just rolled her eyes at me once she turned towards me and tied her hair up in a bun. I moved out of the way so she could look in the mirror not like she needed to but just in case. As I stood a few steps behind her, my eyes went down to the tattoo on her shoulder blade she got with me a few months before we broke up. Yes, it's illegal and yes, we still went and got them done. The guy knew Charles so all he took was a little extra money.

Her tattoo read, 'El amor todo lo puede' in spanish which translates to, 'Love conquers all,' I remember that night so vividly. She got that tattoo while I got 'No dejes para mañana lo que puedas hacer hoy' in spanish which translates to 'Do not leave for tomorrow what you can do today.' I didn't even want to get a saying tattoo, I went to get a stupid meaningless tattoo of a leaf. A freaking leaf and when we got there, Mia said that she learnt this saying from my mom since my mom has a little hispanic in her. And she thought it was something that I could relate to and should get done. I too have mine on my right shoulder blade like her.

"Does it really conquer all?" I asked as my fingers traced her tattoo. She stopped tying her hair, and let it fall down her back. "Huh?" she asked as she turned to face me while I took a step closer, making her take a step back and hit her back on the counter. "El amor todo le puede? aunque realmente lo hace?" I asked her in spanish if love really conquers all. I speak fluent, she speaks almost fluent. We speak in it sometimes.

"Si yo creer que." she nodded which translates to 'Yes I believe that.'

"Well then I hope ours does too." I said as I traced her jaw with my thumb.

"It will." she said without any hesitation and with a confidence and belief in her voice like she knew for a fact that it will. "No puedo besarte ¿puedo?" I asked her as my thumb grazed her bottom lip. She took a minute to think while looking between my eyes and lips.

"No lo siento." she shook her head lightly.

"Please?" I pleaded as I held her face in my hands.

"Ryder..." she trailed off.

I really shouldn't be asking her of this. "Forget it." I said and I was about to pull away but she held my hand and pulled me back, and into a tight hug.

I stiffened at first but quickly wrapped my arms around her, pulling her in.

I think I might have just lost her. 

Or I just got a step closer to getting her back.

I don't know why I added spanish in there. I knew what these sayings were but I did use google translate to double check, so they might be wrong, so if they are, just ignore them but  all the translations are down below:

-El amor todo lo puede = Love conquers all

-No dejes para mañana lo que puedas hacer hoy = Do not leave for tomorrow what you can do today.

-El amor todo le puede? aunque realmente lo hace? = Love conquers all? Does it really?

-Si yo creer que = Yes I believe that.

-No puedo besarte ¿puedo? = I can't kiss you can I?

-No lo siento = No I'm sorry.