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A M A Y A

'My heart's your slave, Amaya Sommers. All my roads lead to you.'

'As long as my heart has a beat, it will beat for you.'

'Running or staying, Snippy?'

'Staying. Always staying.'

'I love you, Carter Bell. Promise me you'll never leave.'

I splash the cold water for the umpteenth time on my face. My nerves are doing a chaotic dance as I shut my eyes, trying to fight back the memories.

It is Carter Bell.

He is here and I will be seeing him face-to-face after five years.

After five long years that changed everything.

He broke every part of me. His memories taint me, his name pierces my heart. The impact of his betrayal was such that every time I look at my son, I regret that he looks more like his father than me.

Tears keep sliding down my eyes and I splash water again, trying to keep the sobs down.

I lost all my excitement as soon as Siana pronounced the name. My first instinct was to rush to the bathroom and here I am now. I have been here for more than fifteen minutes, splashing cold water over my face, again and again, imagining that all I heard was a dream.

"It's okay, Amaya. You can do it," I say bravely to my reflection in the mirror ahead.

My eyes have black patches underneath them, a sign of the fact that I am too tired to go on living the life of a Single Mom. This wasn't how my life was supposed to be.

If everything had gone right, I would have been Carter Bell's wife. He would have been my husband and we would have been raising our kid together. He wasn't supposed to leave me alone midway after promising a lifetime. My son wasn't supposed to be a fatherless child. My Parker deserves every bit of his father's love.

Why did he leave? Why?

Stopping a sob, I rub my wet cheeks, not bothering to put on my makeup again as I turn to leave the washroom.

Once I step out, I am again taken by the commotion Carter's appearance has caused in the office. All the employees look agitated one way or the other, the religious ones even going to the extent of praying for their jobs.

Dragging my footsteps over the marbled flooring, I reach my desk where Siana and Bryce are talking in hushed voices to each other.

"Hey, what's wrong? You ran like you saw a ghost!" Bryce says as he gets down from my desk when he sees me coming.

I take my seat back, faking a smile at them both.

"Nothing. I was just nervous with all the changes," I lie to them, clutching my belly with one hand for effect. "What if I lose my job? I have a child to look after."

"You'll be just fine, buddy." Siana presses a comforting hand behind my back. "It's me you should be worried about. Mr. Bell has already fired one of us."

"What? Who?"

"David Domer, the Vice-Secretary," Siana replies, rolling her eyes. "Said his attendance wasn't satisfactory."

"And who told you that?" Bryce interrupts, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Gabby, of course!" she shrugs. "She's the only one whose job is confirmed here. She's looking after the others now."

"Yay...Gabby..." I comment in a mocking tone.

I am happy that she has the job guarantee. However, I am pretty sure I would be losing mine, and then I don't wish to see her pouting her full lips at me in sympathy.

Just then, the door to Carter's office opens and the large man steps out with his fingers scrolling through an IPad.

"Miss. Amaya Sommers, HR Manager," he calls, seeking for me in the crowd.

I gasp, closing my eyes for a second, knowing that it is finally my turn. My skin prickles as I get up from my seat while Bryce and Siana murmur their 'good lucks' to me.

I grab my portfolio, which we all have to keep a copy of at our desk all the time, and head towards Carter's office.

The large man nods at me and opens the door.

The room I peer in is the one I have been in before several times., except that my boss was Mr. Benjamin Alston, a middle-aged man in his late fifties who treated all his employees kindly.

"May I come in?" I mutter, keeping my head down.

"Yes," the voice that replies chills my very bones.

It is a deep baritone, very much sounding grown up and mature, a voice different from what my Carter's was.

The large man shuts the door behind me, leaving me alone with Carter, and I dare to look up.

The office room is occupied by a simple desk and chairs, a few trophies the company has earned over the years are displayed on the walls except for the glass wall behind the desk from which one can see the beautiful, busy scenario of LA at any time. There is also a private bathroom installed through another door in the room.

He is leaning on his desk with his back to me. From here, I notice that his back appears different than he did years ago.

His shoulders are broader, and the muscles underneath the tailored black suit hide lean muscles. His long legs are covered by shapely dress pants in the pockets of which he has his hands tucked.

I gulp at the sight, a faint blush gathering on my cheeks as I recall moving my hands through that body all those years ago.

This man was mine. His body was once mine.

When he shifts, my heart flutters. I suck in a breath as he turns around, his green eyes after all these years meeting mine straightaway.

We both seem to be stuck in time.

My ears ring with blood rush, a dizzy feeling getting on my nerves.

Carter Bell has changed a lot over the years. His face is perfectly sculpted, the edges sharper, his nose lean, and his lips full. His eyes behind black-rimmed glasses are the deep shade of green I had once been in love with and he has a finely trimmed beard covering his cheeks like a grown man.

My first thought is that I am meeting a stranger. I no longer know this man and yet, he is the father of my child.

"Have a seat, Miss. Sommers," Carter says, pointing toward the chairs on the opposite side of his desk.

'You're not homeless. You live here...with me.'

So we are pretending to be strangers after all.

That's fine by me.

I take the seat he pointed to and place myself down while he sits in his chair.

"Snip-" He opens his mouth but then shuts it just as quickly. "...I mean Miss. Sommers."

Snippy. He was going to call me Snippy.

"Yes...Mr. Bell," I answer, maintaining a professional countenance.

He is not the only one who can play this game.

"Yeah...Miss. Sommers..." he repeats, biting his bottom lip. The slight action makes tingles rush through me when I remember the feeling of those lips on mine. "You happen to be the HR manager here, is that right?"

"Yes sir."

"May I see that?"

He forwards his hand, gesturing for me to hand over my file. I push it towards him hesitantly, not meeting his eyes. He takes it, flipping the file open.

"How long have you been working here?" he questions while scanning the contents of the file.

"Two years, sir."

"Where did you work before?"

"New York," I reply, instantly spotting his fingers holding my file when they tremble at the reply.

"And why did you shift here?"

"Better prospects. Not to mention, I have a family to look after."

He snaps his eyes to meet mine at the mention of 'family'. I know the doubt that has flickered through his mind and the question he is going to ask.

"Family..." he murmurs. "Are you...married, Miss. Sommers?"

I find a corner of my lips pulling to a smirk so I bite my tongue to keep still.

Fucking Billionaire Bastard

"No, Mr. Bell."

He moves his eyes away from me and back to my file, pretending like my answer didn't affect him in any way.

"Miss. Sommers, you know that Incline will now be merged with Overture, which means you're a part of my company now," he explains, taking a peek at me to see how I am taking the news.

"Yes, Mr. Bell."

"Miss. Sommers, since you're the HR manager, I would like you to be in charge of recruiting some new employees and handling the accounts of the ones who will be eliminated from their current jobs."

"But Mr. Bell..." I can't resist the urge to ask because his words sound so not comforting. "Forgive me for asking but where are these employees supposed to go?"

"That's their problem, Miss. Sommers. I have no tolerance for people who can't give their best."

His tone is harsh as he pushes his glasses up his nose and reads my file.

This is not the Carter Bell I once knew.

What happened to the good one? The not-so-grumpy one? The one who told me I would be his wife someday and that he would learn to keep me happy.

"Oh...okay."

"Anything else, Miss. Sommers?" he continues while turning sheets. "I see you're a dedicated employee. If you've any doubts about how your job's going to change, you can ask my assistant, Mr. Dawson, to guide you on the changes. Since you happen to be a highly-recommended employee, I would like to keep you-"

He stops, words droning out when he spots something in the sheet he is reading. I inhale slowly, my heart thudding as the moment I have dreaded actually arrives.

"You have a child?" Carter drops the file on the desk, shifting in his seat as he looks at me.

His green eyes fixed on me, he rubs his thumb over my resume where it is mentioned that I have one child.

The color seems to have drained from Carter's face as he waits for my reply. I notice the movement of his throat as he swallows a gulp while the tick of his jaw becomes visible as his whole body tenses.

"Yes," I reply in a flat voice, keeping my eyes on him with all the courage I can manage.

His lips part as if he has been slapped on the face. His thumb over the number 1 on the resume shakes slightly. He keeps staring at me like he is no longer in control of his actions.

"Son or daughter?" he asks after a while, his face remaining blank.

"Son."

"How old?"

"Excuse me?" I fist my hands on my lap, finding it hard to keep maintaining a professional stance as the direction of his question changes. "I don't see how that's important."

"It is," he blurts, his fingers curling around the edge of my resume.

He crumbles the sheet unknowingly and I know the reason all too well.

"Why is it important, Mr. Bell?" I press on, wanting to push him right off the edge.

He has no right to give me that accusatory look. I am not the one who left him. I am not the one who gave up on us. It was all him.

"You know why," he says, this tone sounding like he is not talking to his employee but to me.

He is just talking to me.

"Amaya..." he continues, voice dropping dangerously low. "How old is he?"

Hearing him say my name after all those years, feeling it roll off his tongue in that soft, sweet way, pushes me to the brink of my strength.

I find my lips shaking, my eyes becoming blurry as I open my mouth to speak the truth which I know would tell him everything.

"It's his birthday next week," I say. "He will be turning four."

•••

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