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sorry for any mistakes but most importantly, this chapter is long so enjoy! 💓 there's a few POV changes. they'll be marked with this emoji: 👁

AJ POV 👁

"Hi baby!!" Zyier cheeses, stepping outside of his house.

I hold my arms open, and after mad long of not seeing each other, we hug. I just got back to Brooklyn yesterday. I was gonna come see him yesterday, but I was tired and was sleep for like fourteen hours or some shit. I ain't mean to sleep that long, but I went into the room just to put my things down, took a shower, and next think I know I'm waking up at 7, 8am. I told Zyier I'd be over early, and I made it here at like 10:30. He knew I was home, and he been excited to see me ever since I told him I was coming home. Five months is crazy, but I couldn't do nothing about it. I can't get to Brooklyn from Virginia by myself. I mean, I could figure it out, but my daddy would never let me.

"Damn," Zyier backs up a little bit, looking me up and down. Then he backs up completely, "It's different seeing you in person." He grins. He been telling me over FaceTime how much I changed, so it's not like he hasn't seen me. But I guess it's different when I'm standing in front of him. "You know how fine you are?" He grabs my face, pulling me into his shoulder. "I gotta hide you baby. I wish we could go inside." He jokes.

"Come on," I laugh in embarrassment. I know I might look a little different, but he shocked like I was ugly before. Unless he knows something I don't know. I don't want to know if that's the case.

Zyier bites his lip, studies my face for a second, and then leans in for a kiss. We would've stayed at his house, but he was telling me his mom has family over so we gonna find someplace else to be. He could have came over to my Uncles house, but it's too much going on over there. Too much to think about. I'm trying to distract myself from a lot that's happening now and what happened in the last five months, and that's not gonna work if I stay in that house for too long.

We decide to go iHop to get some breakfast and catch up and stuff. I'm just shocked the nigga didn't suggest Wendy's. That's the only place he ever wanna go. But he's the one who said iHop in the first place. That's cool with me, I'm really just excited to be around Zyier after a long time. We obviously FaceTime and all that like I said, but it's different when he in my face for real.

"Damn it's packed," Zyier says when we reach the closest iHop which was only like a ten minute walk away. We didn't even have to go inside to know that, the whole parking lot is filled with cars. I don't wanna go in. At all.

I try to hint that we should go someplace else, "It's a diner by here." All them fucking people crowded in that little ass iHop. Somebody in there is gonna bump into me on accident and that's gonna irritate me, so I rather not even put myself in that position.

"Okay.." Zyier smirks at me in confusion like I said something irrelevant. If I bring up a diner and we at a packed iHop, what's the confusion.

"Let's go there instead." I explain anyway besides my frustration. It's not even that serious to be getting mad over, I just think I'm already mad at the sight of all those people in there. Sticky ass tables probably barely wiped down cus the waiters is tryna bounce from table to table. Probably gon be sitting in there for thirty minutes before they could even get to us—no. I'm not going in there.

Zyier grabs my hand, "No I wanted iHop."

"It's mad people in there, I—"

He tries to pull me along, "Relax, they not worried bout us eating fucking pancakes. We ain't special."

It's not even about that, and he knows that. I just don't want to be around all them people bro. It's that simple.

"Let's just go someplace else." I say. I don't care. There's no way I'm gonna end up in there.

Zyier suddenly grabs my hand, and pulls me along with him. Now I'm torn between pulling away from him, or giving in because I know he's gonna be mad if I try to pull away. He won't like the way other people might assume something more serious is going on.

He manages to pull me all the way to the entrance, "Aj. No. Relax." Finally, we walk through the doors and off rip, the loud sounds of peoples forks hitting their plates, and people talking and laughing loud, on top of being among the crowd of people that's waiting to be seated, already puts me on high alert. I shove my hands in my pockets. All these fucking people bro. Crowded in this little space. For some regular ass breakfast at that. I don't understand why anybody would walk in here willingly.

"Just focus on me," Zyier laughs a little, touching my cheek. "You need to calm down. They already bout to seat us."

"I'm calm."

"Oh. I didn't know calm looked like you not being able to stand still in one spot. Eyes darting around....sweat dripping—"

I can admit that I'm probably not calm but he's over exaggerating, "I'm not sweating nigga, stop."

Zyier laughs. Fuck would I be sweating for. "You might as well be." He says. I just stare ahead instead of tryna say anything back or joke back. I already feel myself getting annoyed with him and for no reason at that. I know he's just playing around. He hasn't said nothing that serious. It's just all these people around me that's making me mad at everything and everybody. Zyier said they bout to seat us, so can they just do that already. Damn.

Finally after like five minutes a waiter comes over to us, "For how many?" He asks. Zyier answers, and then we follow him to a table. Of course it's not a booth off the corner or some shit, but a table right in the center of everybody. See, this is why.

Zyier stands at the table for a second. "Can we get that booth instead?" He points to an empty booth with a dirty table. The waiter doesn't say anything at first, then he sighs.

"Um, it's gonna be another wait. Like five more minutes because they have to like, clean the table and stuff."

Zyier shrugs, "We'll wait."

With that the waiter walks off to get somebody to clean the table. "Fuck is this nigga telling me 'um' for?" Zyier says with an attitude. I can't lie, I didn't like that niggas tone either. But I get it. It's too many people in here and Zyier gon tell him the table he giving us not good enough. I woulda been annoyed too if I was him. But, for my own selfish reasons I don't care at all because I rather that seat than this one.

While we're waiting, Zyier grabs my arm and pulls me out the way, "Watch out baby." He mumbles. I was zoned out and didn't notice some girls tryna pass by. I think I might recognize them from my old school. I think they was in my classes. I don't know, I didn't look at them long enough to be sure.

When the table's clean and we're seated, the waiter brings us both a menu.

"I already know what I'm getting. I want the waffle combo with hash browns. And orange juice." Zyier says without even looking at the menu. I might just get the same thing as him so that I don't have to talk or think much. It doesn't matter to me. But they can keep that wack ass orange juice, I just want water.

I push the menu to the side, "Get me the same thing as you. No orange juice."

"So what you want?"

"Water."

Zyier nods, and then pushes both the menus to the edge of the table. Now that all of that is settled, we can start catching up a little bit because I know he wants to and we need to. We talk all the time but you know, shit is different face to face. I feel like we been avoiding talking about some things over the phone that I know he's gonna ask me about in person, so there's that. I could just feel it. I know he's excited to finally see me, so his energy isn't that standoffish, but sometimes when we be on the phone he gives me one word answers and stuff like that. So I'm not sure if it has anything to do with him not being able to see me for five months or what. But we'll talk about it.

After the waiter comes around and takes the order, that leaves time for us to talk. I lean back in my seat and focus's on analyzing Zyier. "I like that lil thing in your hair," I say. He put some blonde shit at the front and put a curve through it. It fits him. "You did that for me?" I ask as a joke.

Zyier rolls his eyes, "I been did this, fuck you." He laughs, "But I like them lil things in your hair."

He's talking about the twists. Yeah, he been loving this shit more than I do. I like it, but Zyier is in love with my hair now. He says it makes me look "sexier" than I already was. I feel like I just look more like my daddy now, like papa said. I like to deny it because I hate the way people swear we identical when we really not, but I can't even deny that sometimes I be looking in the mirror and get scared because I see him when I look at myself sometimes. So here's that. I try to stick to twists because I don't want to have exactly what my daddy has. He's been telling me every now and again, usually when we go to the barbershop, that I should let my hair loc. But I don't know about all that. Because now if I end up not liking them, I'm gonna have to cut my hair and have my whole head shape out in the open. I gotta have at least a little hair on my head. There's a reason why every nigga in this family's hair isn't in a fade. Because if not, we gon look crazy.

I smile. "You stay saying that."

Zyier smiles back at me. "You are so cute when you blushing. Fine as fuck." He damn near making googly eyes at me. "I wish I could put a label on you that say 'This is Zyier's' I'm not even joking."

"I know you not, trust me." He the type to make a shirt and everything. "You making me feel like I was ugly before." I admit. I must've been some wack ass nigga, and just didn't know. Zyier always tells me I'm cute but he dragging it now. I don't think I look that much different. But I must the way he looking like he just meeting me for the first time.

Zyier opens his phone. "If you was ugly I wouldn't be with you in the first place. So that's not it. But you looking like one of them fine ass college basketball players now." He says. Then he asks if he could take a picture of me from the neck down to post on his snap. I tell him it's whatever, long as my face or skin is in it.

"When we gonna pop out though? We bout to make a year in a couple months. And don't give me no run around answer."

"When we make a year." I say. Zyier has been good with giving me time to be comfortable with our relationship being public, and even though there's certain things I'm not comfortable doing yet like kissing in public, or holding hands for too long in public, I feel like I might be ready in a couple months time. But even if I'm not, I know that a year is ode. Especially for somebody who not even in the closet like that. So, I guess that'll be my anniversary gift to him—one post of us. But it can't be one that stays up. It gotta dissapear like them stories and shit. If it don't, I'm gonna end up forcing him to delete it if I think about it too hard.

Zyier seems to like that answer. He starts going on a rant about how he's gonna make it count, and get a hotel room with rose petals on the bed. Then he said we gonna lay next to each other with his head on my shoulder, and then take the picture from above with the rose petals in the back. And then there's gonna be a second picture or video where I'm supposed to be kissing him.

That sounds so corny. I'm not doing that. I'm not gonna say that out loud obviously. I'll let him have his fantasies. But this nigga better just take a picture of us smiling or a closeup of my face and say 'this is my boyfriend.' and call it a day. Nigga talking bout rose petals and shit. Nah bro.

While he's in the middle of ranting about what how we gonna reveal ourselves to the world, those girls from earlier who I said looked like they from my old school come up the the table. Zyier stops talking abruptly, and stares at them in confusion.

"Aj?" One of the girls ask. Okay so they are from my old school. And this is exactly why I hate being out in public. I don't respond. I don't want to confirm or deny. But that only makes them confused

"Wait, are you Aj or...? Wait yeah, you are." The other one says, "You used to go to our school with your sister Taleah. Y'all both left right?"

I nod in response.

"Wow. Yeah I knew that was you. You kind of look different, but I could tell." She purses her lips, "Did you move? I know Taleah go to a Queens school now. But I heard you moved away?"

"Yeah. He did." Zyier answers for me. The girls look at him confused, then look back at me.

"Where'd you move to?" They ask.

I wasn't gonna answer, but fuck they gonna do, follow me? "Vir—"

"Another state." Zyier answers again. Damn.

"What?" One of the girls questions. "I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to him. You were gonna say Virginia?" She asks me again. I don't even know what to say anymore. Zyier is clearly getting mad.

Zyier raises his eyebrows, "Yeah, but he doesn't want to talk right now. We was having a conversation." He points between the both of us, "And y'all just interrupted. No fucking manners. Who raised y'all."

The girls look at each other, and then laugh. "Manners for what, iHop? Nobody was even talking to you in the first place."

Zyier shrugs, "Yeah, but I'm talking to you." 

"Boy—He was gonna answer Virginia and we woulda went on our way. Like."

Zyier makes a shooing motion with his hand. "K. So go then."

One of the girls frowns, "Aj your nigga or something?"

Man, I don't even have time to interject and attempt to tell him what he should respond. Plus with him acting like this, he couldn't be nobody else but my nigga anyways. So it's whatever. Like I said, I'm not in the closet like that anyways.

Zyier shrugs, "Does it matter?"

"Yeah, cus you acting like he is. We all in a relationship, don't worry. Like," They look at each other and laugh, "My nigga on FaceTime with me right now."

"Exactly." Another one says. "Anyways, Aj it's good to see you. You never spoke, so it's good to see you out and doing good." She smiles at me, then cuts her eyes at Zyier.

The other girls smile at me too, then wave bye. The interaction ends with the waiter bringing our food to the table as they walk off. It also left Zyier with an attitude. Them girls wasn't even annoying like that, but now they left me to try and get Zyier out of his mood so thanks for that. Now he's gonna be mad at me like I did something. Watch.

"You want the stuff over here?" I ask him. The salt and pepper and stuff is on my side. And of course he only answers by shaking his head. Honestly, I'm hungry. I gotta get back to making him feel better after I eat. If I wait to pay attention to him, my food gon get cold.

I pick up a fork, "Eat." I try to tell him. As I start at my plate, he just sits back with his arms crossed, occasionally picking at his. Oh my god bro. They shoulda just walked pass me like we probably did in school everyday. I don't even know where to start with him.

"What's wrong baby?" I ask. I had to throw that 'baby' in, even though it be awkward for me to say in person, because I know that's gonna make this easier for me. He got a soft spot for that. Especially because I never call him anything else besides his name. I'm cringing, but I gotta do what I gotta do.

Zyier sighs. "I feel like they was trying me. Tryna make me look dumb. Like bitch, if you say he never spoke, if you know y'all probably never spoke a day in your life, why you coming up to peoples table? Like, bitches wanna be seen so bad. And then gonna play dumb and say they on the phone with they boyfriend. I don't think you would be on the phone with your boyfriend while talking to another nigga. Does that make sense to you?"

"Nah" I answer. It's not that far fetched, but imma play the part.

"Instead of doing all that, faking like they care about how you doing, they could've just walked by like they were doing in school with you. I don't get it. Bitches really want to be seen. But ain't give a fuck before. Not while I'm sitting here you bout to play my nigga. Nope. Sorry." He starts stabbing at his plate now. "I don't care. Call me crazy."

He's just always tryna think a few steps ahead, I don't think that makes him crazy necessarily. Paranoid probably, but who am I to talk. If he feels like he's defending me by arguing with some random girls I went to school with, then that's what it's gonna be then. I could care less. I grab his hand briefly, "You not crazy. I get it." I say to reassure him. So hopefully now, he can get over it.

It doesn't take long for us to move past that and start talking about other things. First we talk about New York vs Virginia and which one I think is better. I said New York, but I'm not sure about that answer. But I know that if I even considered Virgina he wouldn't like that, so I didn't mention it. Then we start to briefly talk about my papa's pregnancy.

"That nigga gonna die bro." I mumble. I wish there was a better way to put it, but what am I supposed to say? That's how I feel.

Zyier hits my hand, "Don't say that. Don't put that in the air."

I shake my head. He shouldn't even be having more kids in the first place. "Triplets is crazy though. He just had a stroke. And he don't want to get rid of them. Shoulda seen the look on his doctors face, like she knows he's gonna die if he don't get rid of it. I don't know why he doesn't care." I feel like papa hears that he can die and acts like it's not a big deal. But on the other hand, why would he? He tried to kill his self.

"He's gonna be fine. How does your dad feel?" Zyier asks. I actually don't know how daddy feels about papa being pregnant now, but if I know anything about him, he probably doesn't like the fact that it's three kids knowing that papa not even supposed to be carrying kids in the first place. But I don't know. Maybe they talked about it yesterday. I shrug. "How about your sister?" He asks.

"Worried." She was worried as soon as the lady said it was three kids. She was excited the most about the pregnancy, but I don't think she's that excited anymore because she knows now that it's not all fun and games. Honestly, they knew they had no business risking having more kids from jump. Shit just don't make no sense. Our situation isn't as simple as it could've been—daddy moving in with us, living and working in New York, and papa happening to get pregnant, but daddy's around so it's not a big deal. Our situation is literally living states apart, with papa having health issues and daddy having mental health issues. Tell me where it looks like three babies can fit in. Nowhere.

Zyier nods in understanding. I don't want to talk about this no more though. I don't want to talk about my fucked up family at all actually. I came to see Zyier because I miss him and because I want to be distracted from them. So, when Zyier stands up and excuses himself to the bathroom it gives me the perfect opportunity to think of a topic change for when he gets back to the table.

I actually have nothing to think of though, so I'm gonna wing it. I feel like we talked about everything important. Now I'm depending on him to start with his hypothetical situations and scenarios and we can just talk about those. I got nothing. I can ask him about his mom maybe. Or we could talk about his job. I know he has work later, maybe we can talk about doing something after he gets off of