Chapter 15

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Wren

I watch Huxley leave, a rock forming in my gut from the sight of him driving away. I turn back and look at my decorated house, but the lights and things aren't bringing me the usual joy that they always have.

I'm still alone, only sorrounded by Christmas spirit.

I sigh and head into the kitchen, hoping some food can lighten my mood. I don't know why I'm feeling like this all of a sudden. If it's discussing my miscarriage or experiencing having Huxley here, in my home with me, and then having him leave. Despite the remaining anger I feel towards him, I can't deny how right it felt to have him here. It was a settled kind of feeling that I've never felt with anyone else. I sigh thinking about it and turn on the tv, hoping the noise will dissipate some of the crushing loneliness I feel.

I wander around the house for awhile, for some reason unable to sit still. I start to get anxious and fidgety so I consider texting Huxley and asking him to come back. But I decide instead that I need to get out of the house. For some reason the space is stifling and I'm having a hard time breathing. I call up Liv, but she doesn't answer. My parents are gone, Russ is working and Jace just doesn't seem like a good idea with how Huxley has been lately. So I decide to get in my car and drive.

There aren't many places to go. Our small town doesn't have much in the way of entertainment and I find myself driving by the diner. It seems like a slow night, Lila buzzing around with a warm smile on her face. I love that girl and hope she goes full time during the summer. Then my eyes land on the bar. It has quite a few cars, but the inside seems subdued. I park and walk in, seeing a new face behind the bar.

"What can I get you?" The guy asks and I give him a small smile.

"Actually, is Huxley here?" I ask and the guy looks me over for a minute before he nods.

"I'll grab him for you." He says and disappears into the back.

Huxley comes through the back door a moment later, his eyes go wide with a small smile before they morph into concern. He walks up to me, watching me wring my hands in anxiety.

"Wren? What happened, baby?" He asks and I shake my head.

"I..." I stammer. He watches me for a moment, looking around before he reaches out and wraps his hand around the back of my neck, rubbing gentle circles with the pad of his thumb as he leads me into the kitchen. He stands close to me and lowers his voice, putting himself between me and the other person working in the back.

"What's wrong?" He asks gently and I heave out a heavy sigh.

"I don't know. I got all... antsy at home. Like I couldn't sit still. I needed to get out for a while. I'm sorry to bother you, it's just Liv is busy and Russ is working. My parents aren't here and I..." I ramble but he shooses me gently, pulling me into his arms. I close my eyes and try to relax, his warmth comforting me.

"Don't ever apologize for coming to me. I want to be the first person you go to when you need something. Not your last resort." He says, pulling away and gripping my chin until I look up at him. "You understand?" He asks and I nod, leaning back into his chest. He grips my hand and threads our fingers together, pulling me towards the stairs.

"Come on, baby girl." He murmurs, leading me up to his apartment. He pushes the door open and lets me walk in first, turning to tuck me into his arms again after he closes the door. He presses a firm kiss to my head as he holds me and I feel my anxiety from earlier begin to dissipate. I don't really understand it, but he makes me feel better.

"I don't know what happened." I say and he shrugs.

"Kind of sounds like a panic attack." He says and I look up at him confused.

"I thought that was like, not being able to breathe. Or move." I say and he sighs a little.

"Not always. Everyone responds to stress differently. Maybe you get anxious and jittery." He says and I sigh, tightening my grip around him. He lifts me and sits on the couch with me in his lap like he did earlier and all of my racing thoughts seem to slow until I can breathe normally again.

"I have a few things to finish up downstairs. Will you be alright for a few minutes?" He asks worriedly and I nod, giving him a small smile.

"I'll be fine. Don't worry about me." I say and he scoffs.

"I'll always worry about you. I won't be long. Just text me if you need something. Are you hungry? I can bring up some dinner." He offers and I feel myself soften towards him even more, his sweet, open concern for me touching somewhere deep in my heart.

"I'm ok." I say and he appraises me again.

"I'll bring up some dinner." He says firmly and I giggle before going to stand up, but he grabs me back into his firm embrace, hugging me tightly and breathing me in before he sets me gently on his couch and wraps me in a blanket. He turns on the tv and hands me the remote before leaning down and pressing a firm kiss to my forehead. I close my eyes to soak in the affection, wishing that he would kiss me on the mouth again. But he hasn't since the night we were together. Part of me wonders if he's mad that I won't give in to him and that's why he hasn't kissed me, but the other part thinks it's just him being respectful.

"I won't be gone long." He says, giving me one last longing look before he heads out the door.

I flip through channels aimlessly until I find a Christmas movie. I figure it's good enough, so I curl up in the blanket that smells so much like him and lay down on the couch. My eyes travel back to his bedroom against their will, my mind replaying what happened in that room despite my best efforts. I groan in frustration, rolling around trying to push aside these feelings that I'm having. Maybe it was a mistake to come here. True to his word, Huxley comes back less than an hour later, containers of food stacked high. I smile at the sight and sit up to grab them from him.

"I brought a little of everything." He says, his eyes flitting over me nervously.

"What's wrong?" I ask and he clears his throat before sitting next to me, dishing out some food.

"Nothing. I just haven't had anyone in here before. Well except that one night you were here but there wasn't much... talking." He says and I chuckle, taking a bite of a sandwich.

"You want me to leave?" I tease and he huffs at me.

"Wren, I will never want you to leave." He says firmly and I melt a little at his words. I finish eating and curl back up to watch the show, my eyes flicking to Huxley every once in a while. He cleans up the food and comes back towards me, slipping in behind me on the couch and tucking me into his chest. I throw the blanket over him and he chuckles quietly.

"Can you see?" I ask and he buries his face in my neck.

"Don't need to. This is good." He says, the vibrations from his voice sending a shiver through my body and he tightens his hold on me. We lay quietly like this and I feel my heart rate calm as my body relaxes. Once the movie is over, I roll over towards him and tuck my face into him.

"I should go home." I say and he grunts, pulling me closer.

"Stay here." He states more than asks. I look up at him and see nothing but sincerity in his eyes.

"I don't want a repeat of the last time I was here." I say firmly despite my body's disagreement. I can feel myself heat up at the thought. Huxley just laughs a low, gruff sound that makes me bite back a groan.

"None of that. Not till you ask for it, anyway." He says with a smug grin that makes me roll my eyes. I yawn widely and Huxley's eyes turn affectionate. He sits up and lifts me, carrying me into his room and tucking me into bed. The smell of his cologne sorrounds me and my eyes get heavier. I'm not sure when his scent started to soothe me, but it does.

"Here. Put these on." He says, handing me a shirt and some sweatpants. I slip into the bathroom to change and come out to a shirtless Huxley, biting my lower lip as my eyes trace his torso.

"You done?" He asks, clearly amused as he holds the blanket up for me to slide into bed. I roll my eyes and follow his silent request.

He nestles up close to me, a low hum of content slipping from him as he slips a hand up the hem of my shirt, his fingertips grazing against the soft skin of my belly. I relax in his hold, my eyes slipping closed.

"This is where you should be every night." He whispers in my ear and I get a sleepy grin on my face.

"In your bed?" I ask and he shakes his head, burrowing further into my hair.

"In my arms."


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