Chapter Thirty: intensity
Josh's POV
*edited*

"Joshy." I heard a whisper in my ear.

Instantly I groaned loudly and huffed. "If you wake me up, we are throwing hands on the spot."

Callum chuckled, "Wake up." He said, ripping the blankets off of my curled body and pushing me until I fell onto the floor.

"I guess I'm sleeping here now." I said, curling into a ball on the carpet.

"Get your sleepy ass up, Joshy. We have stuff to do." He clapped his hand and I stirred more as I finally started to wake up.

"Like what?"

He grinned, "Mom is out, dad is lost in the wind somewhere. Time to come to mine and finally finish what we started."

I smiled at him, suddenly wide awake and standing on my feet. "Oh it's finally time."

~~~

"Oh Callum. You can't do it like that. You'll break me."

He winced, "Sorry. I'm sorry."

I placed my hands on his shoulders, "Be gentle."

He glared, "Can't you see I'm trying?"

He stepped on my foot for the sixth time, I winced. "Obviously not hard enough." I whined, Staring down at my broken toes

"This whole dance thing is hard. Why did we ever decide to learn it?"

When Callum and I were 14 we would come to his house every day and danced til we had collapsed on the ground from exhaustion. His mom and dad were always out fucking around and so I'd come over and we'd go in his backyard... and dance.

When we turned 15 was when Callum said they really started to drown themselves in drugs and alcohol and spend a lot more time of their life at home.

I guess he's out of practice. It has been a year.

"I say..." I stepped back. "We just freestyle."

Callum narrowed his eyes before saying, "I dunno man. If you freestyle you might scare all the neighbors away."

"It's not like you want your neighbors near you anyway."

Callum cackled. "True true. Ok. Fine. Freestyle. What song?"

I thought about it, and then harder. And even harder until Callum finally gave up in my choice and put on a song, I had no idea what it was.

It was cloudy today, not too hot so Callum and I were wearing sweats— Callum was wearing sweats, I was wearing long basketball shorts.

And we were both wearing short sleeved shirts.

As the music played, which happened to be the song Callum had designated was our song: No Matter Where You Are.

We just... danced. Like crazy people. We didn't follow any rhythm, we probably looked like we were having a seizure standing up. We flopped around like a fish out of water and it wasn't until we heard distant thunder when we hesitated.

But then Callum grinned his perfect lopsided smile and I smiled back and, even when it started to sprinkle, we just danced even more.

Callum made an effort to dodge the raindrops, jerking around as if he could dodge them all and when he really started raining he kept pretending to punch the rain out of his way.

Just two boys in the rain, listening to music and having strokes, fighting rain.

I was happy. I hadn't thought once about my crush on Callum because we kept throwing insults at eachother back and forth, insulting our dance moves before we ended up just having a full on dance battle.

Callum looked like a dog with flees trying to scratch itself but doesn't have a back leg.

I doubt I looked any better to be honest.

We hadn't even noticed it started no mercy pouring until a slow song came on and Callum looked at me with a cheesy grin.

He bent down in a bow and said in his best British accent. "Would you accompany me for this dance?"

I curtsied and placed my hand in his. "Of course."

We both cackled as we started swaying, both of us grinning like idiots.

We were slipping in mud, grimacing when our clothes got stuck on our sick from the drenched state. Stumbling, laughing, giggling messes we were.

It had been a long while since I had come to his house, even longer since I had come here and was greeted by a happy vibe rather than Callum's stressed one.

Surprisingly Callum didn't step on my toes... but that didn't stop him from joking about my height.

I wasn't short ok. But apparently to Callum, I was the smallest little thing in the world.

"Come on Joshy Washy. Step on my toes so we can be level, I won't mind." He said in his posh British voice.

I glared at him, "I'll push you into the mud."

He chuckled, "Thats what you said at the pond but it didn't end up happening."

I turned red at the memory, "Shut up." I grumbled and his head tilted back as he laughed hard.

"If you're gonna make a threat, you gotta fulfill it." He teased, his hands on my waist,
making me shiver. "Are you cold? Wanna go inside? Cause if so, get over it." He grinned.

Fuck no you moron. Take a hint from the red face.  I. Like. You.

I guess being in his presence without him knowing for so long is giving my mind a grudge over unknowing Callum.

I did want to go inside now, because I could see the lighting and as much as I would love to stay outside dancing with Callum, I didn't want to die.

"No I'm serious, take me inside you two left footed baboon. Let's go." I pulled away and put out my hand.

He grabbed my hand, rushing to get inside so fast neither of us noticed when our fingers interlaces. He was dragging me inside and towards his room and he didn't let go until he had to use both hands for something.

"Go take a shower. I'm going to try and find you some clothes you can wear." He thought for a moment, "I'll place them outside the door." And with that he closed his bedroom door and left me huffing.

His stupid ass gets me drenched and doesn't even have any of my clothes.

I didn't blame him though. My house had all his clothes because he spent most of his days there.

The shower was the best thing I had ever felt and Callum wasn't lying about the clothes being outside my door.

Although the water was lukewarm and barely got above room temperature, it was still warmer than the cold rain.

I changed, noticing how I was wearing his sweatshirt again and his sisters sweats.

Callum's sweatshirt was like a tent on me, it easily reached my middle thigh and was too long on the sleeves. I felt like a girl being bundled in a sweatshirt she bought three sizes too big.

The sweatshirt, like his other one, smelt amazingly similar to him and he wasn't lying earlier with my grandparents when he said he smelt nice.

Ugh, I sound like I was obsessed with him. I kind of was, but not in a creepy way.

I found Callum in the kitchen eating a bag of chips, leaning against the counter. He snickered when he saw me.

"You look like you're awfully proportioned."

I glared into his head. "Well if you weren't a giant it wouldn't be my fault."

He cackled, "Stop complaining. You better not get that one dirty, it's the best one I own." He smacked his lips, "My favorite." He pointed out and I looked down to the light blue fabric and pictured it on Callum's frame.

I shook my head and looked at Callum, who was running his eyes over me, making me tense.

He rolled his body lip between his tooth, staring at me with a warm look on his face.

"It looks good." He said nodding, "I think... I think it looks really good." His voice dropped slightly.

I walked towards him, "It's a bed sheet Callum, of course it looks good. Everybody looks good in big clothes because you can't see their body."

Callum rolled his eyes, "I meant you look good in my-" he stopped shaking his head. "The shirt. The shirt looks good on you."

I flushed, "You think? I always thought blue wasn't my color. I like the way green looks on me."

Callum shrugged, "Anything looks good on you," he was kinda murmuring his words, looking lost in his own thoughts as he continued to stare at me.

I walked up next to him, leaning against the counter he was leaning against. I looked up to him and he glanced down to me.

"Everything looks good on me because I'm good looking." I snapped, "That's a no brainer. But green just happens to look the best."

Callum hummed, "Sure." He said, then his eyes shifted to my hair. He ran a hand through it. "Your hair is pretty nice too."

I laughed, "What is it? A 'compliment Josh' day? It's not my birthday is it?"

Callum shook his head, "No, No Josh it's not. What I'm not allowed to compliment you?" He teased.

"No." I rolled my eyes, "Why would you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Compliment me."

He groaned, "Not this again..."

I shook my head, "No no just like tell me... why do you compliment me so much when I'm not even that attractive." I felt insecure, vulnerable, I felt bad about asking him that question and if I could pressed rewind than I would in a second.

I felt insecure because I wondered... if Callum could compliment me like this, how spoiled would his partner be? Someone he really loved in... that way.

Callum turned towards me. "Fine." He snapped, "Fine you want me to answer your damn question?" I could hear the anger in his voice. "I'll answer the damn question. You ask why I compliment you? Well here's why Josh. Because I like the way you look, I like how tall you are, I think it's perfect because it's shorter than me but I think it's the perfect height. I like your physique because I like the way you look when you wear my hoodies or my sweatshirts

"I like your eyes because for fucks sales Josh, the way they sparkle when you look at something you love is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my entire life. I like the way you shift or blush when your nervous because you're pale and I like how you have to ask me to help you put sunscreen on the back of your neck so you don't burn. I like your stupid hair because I like stupid you, and it pisses me off when you talk so low on yourself because in the end Josh you're doing nothing but making me want to tell you how much I like every part of you, all the more often. I compliment you because you are fucking attractive Josh." Callum's hand slipped to my jaw. "Because even down the eyelash in the corner of your eye that curls down instead of up like the others... I like that too."

And with that said Callum's lips were pressed against mine. Something I didn't see coming when I had been woken up in the early hours of the morning.

I was kissing back. Finally kissing back again finally getting to feel Callum in the way that I wanted to finally.

My hand went to slip to Callum's neck, press us closer but before I could the door flung open and four people were walking in.

"What the hell?" Callum's dad grumbled.

And there, in that moment, the loudest screaming I've ever heard commenced.

And the saddest part was Callum stood there, and he let them yell and only when his dad brought me into the conversation did Callum start yelling back.

The last thing we heard before we got kicked out were slurs of all sorts, even ones that didn't occur to us, being thrown at us in all directions.

Callum was quiet when we got back to the car, I could tell he was angry, but I could tell even more that he was sad.

Heartbroken even.

"Callum..."

"I'm gonna drop you off." Callum said, his voice weak from the yelling, "But I'm gonna go off for a bit," he whispered, rubbing at his face.

My eyebrows raised, "What? Off how?"

Callum sighed, rubbing his jaw. "I just need to think of some things..."

"Callum if this is about your sexuality we can go through it together you know... or at least you can go through it with me?"

He shook his head, "It's not that."

We pulled up in front of my house awhile later.

"It's more complicated than just that... I already know what I am. But..." he sighed, "I'll see you soon Josh."

And with that I got out of the car, swallowed down the pain deep in my chest.

I felt like crying.

There was no doubt in my mind Callum would go back to his house and get the shit beat out of him.

——————-

Do I even need this part for such an intense chapter? Oof.

So uh, hope you enjoyed????<3

Comment/vote :D