Olivia

"Gosh, who would have imagined that my little B cups could hold so much milk!" Cassie screeched from the kitchen, grabbing napkins to wipe herself off.

Her shirt had milk stains right over her nipples that had me laughing despite her misery.

"It's not funny, Liv." she huffed, letting her hands fall to her sides in defeat. "He eats like every hour or so, and I still leak."

I looked down at Grayson, who was sleeping soundly in my arms, giggling softly as I bounced him.

"He looks like he eats a ton." I smiled, pinching at his chunky cheeks gently. "He's caught up a lot on his weight the last month, I feel like."

"He went from preemie to 3-month sized clothing almost overnight, Liv. I'm telling you this kid is going to eat me out of house and home when he's older."

"He's definitely your child." I laughed, watching as Cassie rolled her eyes.

"I'm going to change this shirt." She groaned, wheeling over to me. "He should be fine."

Nodding my head, I fanned her off. "Yeah, I've got him, Cass, go change."

She smiled before rushing off into her bedroom, leaving Gray and I alone in the living area.

"Your mommy is crazy." I chuckled, looking down at Grayson, brushing his head of thick, curly hair gently with my fingers. "But we have no choice but to love her, do we?"

Grayson's eyes slowly opened, fixating on my face as he raised his little hand to hold onto my finger. I smiled down at him, cooing softly as he gripped onto it as tightly as his little hand could manage.

Cassie came back into the room a few minutes later, plopping down carefully on the sofa beside me and resting her head on my shoulder.

Cassie rubbed her index finger across his cheek as she smiled, "I love how much he loves you, Liv. He's so calm and happy with his godmom."

"I love him too, so so much." I babbled, raising him slightly and kissing his chunky cheeks. "He's so perfect."

"He is." Cassie agreed, watching as he began to doze off into slumber once more. "Do you want some wine, babes?" Cassie asked, gesturing toward the bottle of Stella Rosa on the table. "It's nothing too strong or fancy. I've been keeping my intake low since I'm breastfeeding Gray."

"You know I'm not into strong wine anyway." I grinned. "I love my grape juice with just a splash of alcohol."

"Of course." Cassie laughed, grabbing the bottle before maneuvering to her chair to get a glass. "I think I have watermelon in the fridge if you'd rather that." She offered, glancing over at me.

"The original one is fine." I shrugged, looking back down at Gray. "I just need something to calm my nerves down."

"Uh oh. What's going on, babes?" Cassie asked, sitting back down and handing me the glass.

"Jason and I had a rough weekend...." I trailed off, taking a sip of the wine.

The savory, sweet taste of it sent delight across my taste buds and a warm feeling throughout me as I swallowed.

"How so?" she questioned, leaning on the edge of the sofa with her elbow, facing me fully now.

I told her everything. From the moment he got the text, to before we left for Oswego, to the panic attack he had in the middle of the night. I told her about how I felt like he wasn't ready to go to work because his head wasn't in the right place and how nervous I was for him to be out there where those guys are already risking their lives without the extra emotional pressure Jason was under. It terrified me.

Cassie looked at me, stunned. Her mouth had fallen open as she took in all the information I had just dropped on her.

"Liv, I'm so sorry." She shook her head. "So his dad...he's actually in the city right now?"

Nodding, I took another sip of my wine. "I think so, that's what he said in the text...and Jason, he's just been so out of it ever since Cass, I'm so nervous that he's going to do something crazy and get hurt."

"I get that, babes, but try not to freak out, okay?" She asked, taking Gray onto her arms. "He's got Russ right beside him the entire shift. He wouldn't let him do anything crazy. You know how they are with each other."

"I know...I just can't help but worry, Cass."

"Those two are always looking out for each other babes, that's one of the only things that keep me calm when Russ walks out that door to go to work every shift. I know they've got each other's backs." Cassie reminded me, Resting Grayson's head on her shoulder, patting his back gently.

"It must be even harder now that you have a baby with him...I can't even imagine what that feels like, Cass, knowing he could be walking into the most dangerous situations...I don't know how I'm going to cope when Jason and I have one."

"Well, babes, you're just going to have to trust that he's trained well and is capable of doing the job that he loves accordingly...kind of like you need to right now." She smiled gently.

I placed the wine glass down on the table in front of us before sinking back on the sofa with crossed arms. "I know," I admitted, shaking my head. "It's just...he's not in the right state of mind Cass, I can't even put in words how awful it was to see him in the state he was in over the weekend. You wouldn't have recognized him...hell, I hardly could."

Well, maybe working will help him regain some control again, Liv. I think he's seeking a source that allows him to feel like himself...and at the end of the day, neither of us can relate to what Jason has been through, so we can't really aid him in how to deal with it. You know?"

"You're probably right." I sighed, pouting to myself.

Cassie always had to come along and make sense, didn't she?

"Probably?" She chuckled, cocking up her brows.

I laughed as I shook my head, "Fine, you are right, Cassie."

"I know." She sang, glancing down at Grayson as he babbled incoherently. "See? Grayson says that his uncle Jason is going to be just fine."

"Well, I guess I'll calm down since I have baby Gray's word." I chuckled, smiling in his direction.

"Well, duh!" Cassie cheered, holding him up against her face. "Who would disagree with this precious little face?"

"Only a crazy person." I cooed, tickling Gray's tummy, making him smile. "I love you two so much." I smiled, laying my head on Cassie's shoulder.

She rested her head on top of mine, sighing softly. "We love you too, and we'll always be here for you, babes."

The hours had gone by quickly as Cassie and I spent the day laughing and talking about various things. It was such a nice distraction for me, and I honestly enjoyed spending time with her and Grayson. As the sunset and the time grew late, we all grew tired, including baby Gray.

"I'd ask you to sleep over since the boys are at work, but this little one is still waking up every hour or two during the night for one of my boobs, so you wouldn't get much sleep." Cassie laughed, bouncing Gray in her arms as we walked toward the front door.

"I love you both, but I would love not to be a part of that." I chuckled, kissing Gray on the cheek. "I have a couple of papers I need to get started on anyway."

"Ohhh." Cassie sighed, rolling her eyes. "I do not miss all of that, but I hope to be back in school next year once I'm more settled into this whole mommy thing."

"You'll get everything done in due time, Cass. For now, you take care of your little boy and enjoy him while he's still so tiny. You're doing an amazing job."

"Thank you, babes. Sometimes, I really need to hear that."

"Always," I assured her, pulling her into a tight hug. "I love you guys, and I'll see you both tomorrow."

"We love you too, Liv, goodnight."

"Goodnight." I smiled, blowing Gray a kiss before heading across the hall to my home.

As soon as I shut the door behind me, I kicked off my shoes, plopped down on the cool leather of the sofa, and quickly pulled my phone out of the pocket of my jeans.

My finger immediately found Jason's contact and dialed him up. It didn't take more than two full rings for him to pick up the phone.

"Hi, sweetheart." He answered. His voice was low and husky. It sounded as if he'd just been woken from his sleep.

"Aw baby, did I wake you up?" I asked, suddenly feeling a little guilty.

I just really needed to hear his voice.

"Not really. We've been in and out all day on calls, so I tried to sneak in a little nap. But it's okay. I love hearing your voice, baby. How was your day?"

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" I questioned, resting my head back against the sofa cushion.

"I hope you weren't worrying all day, sweetheart. I told you I'm fine." He chuckled, bringing a smile to my face.

He did sound fine, happy almost.

"I can't help it, babe. I don't want anything happening to you, especially not over this."

"I feel a lot better," Jason stated confidently. "You won't believe what I did." He teased, causing me to sit up straight in my seat.

"Jason, what did you do?" I asked, slightly alarmed.

"I confronted my dad in person before work."

"What?!" I nearly yelled into the phone. "Where?"

"It was at filtered, he sent me a text right after I left the apartment, and halfway into my commute, I said fuck running, you know? If the bastard wanted to see me, I'd let him see me. I'm not that same scared little boy anymore. I won't let myself be."

I stayed silent for a moment, digesting what he had just told me. I wasn't sure if he was actually feeling better right now or if he was just on some type of adrenaline high from his encounter.

"A-are you sure you feel better after that, babe?"

"I promise I do, Liv. I needed to do it, to prove to myself that I'm stronger than I thought I was."

Sighing, I relaxed once more, deciding I'd dig more into it once he got home in the morning.

"Okay, baby." I breathed out, switching the phone to my other ear, hearing an alarm sound on his end of the call.

"I gotta go, sweetheart. We just got a call." He said quickly. His voice was unsteady as he had obviously hoped out of bed and began moving around.

"I love you, be careful," I whispered, listening to his footsteps as he ran across the cement floors of the station.

"I will, sweetheart. I love you even more."

And with that, he hung up the phone, leaving me to sit with my thoughts once more, but I decided I didn't want to wallow in them for very long. I got up from the sofa and made my way into the bathroom to take a hot shower and get ready for bed.

The faster I went to sleep just meant the faster that I'd be able to be wrapped in Jason's arms again and that he'd be home with me, safe and sound.

I slipped into one of Jason's T-shirts after my shower and laid in the middle of the California king-size bed. While it felt lonely without him, his scent lingered on the sheets, and it comforted me as I drifted off into a deep slumber.

My phone ringing woke me abruptly from my sleep. It was very unusual for the sound to be on full blast. Usually, it was on vibrate, and only if Jason was on shift for the night. My vision was hazy, so I couldn't even see who was calling as I answered.

"Olivia?" Russ's voice called out from the other end of the line before I even had the chance to speak. "Liv, are you there?" His voice shook, sending an eerie chill down my spine.

I sat up straight in the bed, staring forward into the darkness of the room. The cool breeze from the fan brushed over my skin as goosebumps rose across it.

"Russ, why are you calling me in the middle of the night?" I asked. My voice shook as I spoke, holding the phone tightly in my sweaty palms.

I knew from the tone of his voice that something was wrong. Very wrong.

"It's Jason..." His voice cracked. He sounded like he was battling to keep his emotions neutral while he spoke with me. "He got hurt, Olivia, like seriously hurt. We're at Memorial Hospital, and I just...you should get here as soon as possible."

"We were, we were uh, at an apartment fire and-" He cut himself short, sucking in a deep breath before continuing. "He got trapped in a bad spot. We couldn't get to him before...before the entire structure came down on top of him."

It was like my entire world stopped spinning, my heart stopped beating, and my lungs quit breathing. I didn't know how to comprehend what I had just heard. As badly as I wanted to jump out of bed and run to that hospital, right now, my legs had gone numb. All of me was numb.

"I-Is he alive?" I asked, my voice hardly audible as I struggled to find the strength even to speak.

"He's on life-support, Liv. He's not breathing on his own, and they're saying he's got no brain activity...like he's brain dead...which means-"

"That he is dead," I uttered emotionlessly. "Jason's dead."

"Liv-"

"I'm on my way." I choked out, forcing my legs to climb out of bed and rushing to the front door where my slides were.

I didn't even care that I was going out into the night in nothing but the oversized T-shirt that belonged to Jason. A T-shirt that he'd never get to wear again. How could I care about how I looked when I was about to face my worst nightmare head-on? How was I supposed to go to that hospital and see the love of my life for the last time?

Tears streamed down my cheeks as I rushed to my car, speeding off into the New York city streets. Although the hospital was only a couple of blocks away, it felt like it took a hundred miles to get there.

I just wanted to get there before they took him off of the machines so that I could touch his warm skin and see him breathing one last time. I wanted to tell him how much I loved him and how angry I was with him for making me live without him. How was I going to live without him?

He should have stayed home. I begged him to stay home, but he went anyway, and now he was never coming back.

I threw my gear shift in park, hardly making it into the allotted parking spot before rushing into the emergency room, leaving my keys in the ignition and all. I didn't care.

"Where is he?!" I yelled out through my tears, nearly smashing into Russ as he wrapped his arms around me. "What the hell happened to him?!"

Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion as I looked around frantically.

"Olivia, you have to calm down."

"Calm down?!" I shouted, feeling my blood start to boil. The range of emotions rushing through my head was overwhelming, unbearable even. "You call me and tell me that my boyfriend is brain dead, but I need to calm down?!"

"Hey, baby, come here." I heard another voice speak from behind me, their arms embracing me and pulling me away from Russ.

I turned to see Mariana, who had tears in her eyes. Her face was covered in soot and ash.

"How the hell did he get trapped in a building, Mariana?" I asked, tears flowing uncontrollably from my eyes. "How did that happen to him?"

"He was trying to save a little girl, Olivia. No one was supposed to go back inside, but Jason...he did it anyway, and Russ and I ran after him, but we were too late. He passed us the baby, and literally a millisecond later, the floor gave in right under him."

I felt my stomach grow violently nauseous as the reality of Jason's inevitable death set in. I broke out of their arms and rushed over to a trash can in the corner and vomiting strenuously into it.

Russ came up behind me and held my hair back, placing a hand on my shoulder as I broke completely down on the cold tile floors. 

I didn't want to exist anymore, not in a world where Jason wouldn't be there.

"Olivia?" I heard my name get called from a distance, but I didn't care. I didn't care about anything or anyone anymore.

"Olivia!" The voice called out again, louder this time. It almost sounded like Jason's voice, sending chills down my spine. He was already haunting me.

"Olivia! Wake up!"

My eyes flew open, landing on a very concerned Jason, who was leaning over me, watching me with frantic eyes.

I nearly lept into his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist, full-on sobbing into his Navy work-shirt. The relief that I felt was astounding as his warm skin rubbed against mine as he held me tightly, and his heartbeat pounded against my own chest.

He was alive. He was here. He was okay.

"Sweetheart, what's the matter? I came into the room, and you were crying in your sleep." He questioned, rubbing my back with his large hand. "It was so hard to wake you up. I was getting nervous."

"I-I thought you were dead, Jason." I cried out, feeling my hot tears soak into his shirt. "I thought I was never going to see you again."

"What?" He asked, holding my head up in his hands so that I was looking into his eyes. "It was just a bad dream, okay? Don't cry, baby." He shushed me, pulling me close once more.

"It seemed so real...I got a phone call and I-just-I-"

"Shhh, it's okay." He quieted me, shaking his head. "I'm right here, okay? I'm not leaving you anytime soon."

"I wouldn't survive without you."

"Look at me, sweetheart," Jason ordered, pulling back and tilting my chin up with his finger.

He took my hands gently in his and placed light kisses onto both of them before letting them rest on his cheeks. As I looked into his beautiful blue eyes, I stroked the soft, warm skin on his face, the stubble on his cheeks tickling my thumbs.

"You would survive just fine without me. You're the strongest woman I know." He smiled, pressing our noses together intimately. "But I plan on sticking around long enough to live a happy life with you...a wedding, kids...all of it."

A smile crept on my lips as I stared up into his eyes, watching him as he gazed back down at me with so much love in his own.

"I love you, Jason...and I'm glad you're not dead."

"I love you too, sweetheart." He chuckled, placing a soft kiss on my lips. "I need to go take a shower and get comfy." He chuckled as I wrapped myself around him even tighter.

"I'm not ready to let you go." I protested, shaking my head.

"I'll be quick, and then we'll lay in bed and cuddle for the rest of the morning. How's that sound?"

I pouted my lips at him, to which he snickered before placing another quick kiss on them.

"Okay, but be quick." I gave in, loosening my hold.

"Ten minutes max."

My eyes drifted over to glance at the clock on his nightstand before looking back up at him.

"It's 7:15, so you better be back in here at 7:25, or I'm coming in there." I warned with a playful smile."

"I wouldn't be too mad about that." He winked, earning a jovial smack from me.

"Of course you wouldn't be. Go shower Jase." I laughed, watching as he disappeared into the bathroom. 

A/N: But did I scare you? 🤪

Thank y'all for reading, voting, and sharing your thoughts on Trust Me! I really appreciate y'all.