These are the FINAL chapters of the book! So prepare yourself for the ending! If you want you can now read from the beginning to the end <3

Everything else faded away when we kissed. All of my worries flew out of my mind and all I could focus on was Logan.

He kissed me like a man starved. Like he hadn't kissed me in days instead of hours. I kissed him back the same way as I ran my fingers up his abs to his chest. It was like he was a drug I couldn't quit; not that I wanted to.

Pulling apart, Logan rested his forehead against mine breathing heavy. His hands moved away from my head to wrap around my waist, keeping me pressed against him.

"You taste like hot chocolate." I murmured, hand coming up and grazing the stubble on his chin.

"So do you." He pecked my lips once, twice.

We stood there in silence for another moment before I spoke again.

"I got you a present." 

"You did?" He leaned back, surprise written all over his face. Nodding, I slipped out of his hold and went over to the bed. I felt bad his present was still in the shipping package and not all neatly wrapped, one of my favorite things to do for Christmas, but it would have to work.

Feeling nervous once again I extended the present hoping he'll like it. I played with the hem of my shirt as Logan opened the gift, his face blank. My lips twitched at the sight of the apron and the words on the front. It looked better in person than on the website.

When he didn't say anything I started to worry that it wasn't a good gift.

"Everyone needs an apron and I thought you'd think it's funny. Get it? Hands off my buns and then the little buns?" I rambled. "I saw it and thought of you but you don't have to wear it if you don't like it."

Shut up Olivia.

I clamped my lips together to stop further embarrassing myself. Every second that ticked by made my nerves skyrocket. I mean if he hates it just say something.

"You got this for me?" Logan finally said after three excruciating minutes.

"Yeah...it's Christmas." came my lame response.

"The last present I got was when I was 17." Logan said softly, still staring at the apron.

(Mental illness Warning ahead)

My eyes widened at his words. 17? He hasn't gotten a single present for Christmas or his birthday? He was 33 for crying out loud.

"Logan." He looked away from his gift to send me a soft sad smile. He took a seat on the edge of the bed staring at the apron wistfully.

"Growing up we didn't have much. My mom was a single parent trying her best to give us a good life but it was hard at times."

I kept my lips clamped as Logan started talking about his past. Something I thought would never happen. He was so closed off at times. Rightfully so after what happened with his brother and in the Marine's.

"My mom was the best person I knew growing up. Always coming to my baseball games, taking us out for ice cream when we had a bad day at a school. Baking cookies with us." As he spoke a ghost of a smile appeared on his face. I sat beside him on the bed, entranced as he talked about his mom for the first time.

"We didn't do much for Christmas. Blake and I only got one present, sometimes two if it was a good year, but that didn't matter to us. Even with one present my mom managed to make Christmas feel like the greatest holiday."

Logan's voice got quieter as he went on telling the story.

"When I left for the Marine's my mom wasn't exactly thrilled. Mostly because she didn't like the unexpected and that's what came with the military. Blake understood and even made jokes that he'll get laid more cause girls will feel bad his brother is overseas." I smiled, loving his younger brother even though we'll never meet.

"My mom somewhat got over it as the years went on but everything changed the night Blake died." That haunted look came back. "The accident triggered something in her. She..."

His throat worked to try and get the words out. I placed my hand on his, squeezing, hoping to somehow give him some of my strength. A part of me wanted to tell him he didn't need to say anymore but I knew he needed to get this out. He's been holding it in for so long, letting it eat away at him.

"She had a mental breakdown. She stopped leaving the house. Stopped doing all the things she use to. Wouldn't leave the bed half the time. Until eventually she tried to hurt herself." His voice got thick. "She went to the hospital and stayed there for awhile before they moved her into a different facility. I had no other choice."

My heart was breaking hearing about his mom. I couldn't begin to imagine what that had to been like for him, and right after losing his brother.

"I tried my best to check in on her everyday but it was hard being overseas. The facility where she was at was great though. Always giving me updates and letting me know how she was doing. She was slowly getting better and just as I was getting out she had a stroke."

Logan eyes were staring, unfocused, as he got lost in his head.

"When she woke up she forgot who I was. Whatever stroke she had wiped her memory of almost everything; me, my brother."

"Is she doing better?" I found myself asking. Logan shook his head.

"She living in a home about thirty minutes from Burlington. I try and go see her when I can. For Christmas I go see her even though she never remembers me."

I hadn't realized I was crying until tears dripped off my chin. I had absolutely no idea what he has gone through. Having to see your mom and her not remember you. That's where he disappears to every Christmas. That's why he never accepts the invite to come here.

"Logan I am so sorry." My voice comes out in a soft whisper. He doesn't say anything in response but the squeeze of my hand lets me know he heard me.

Instant guilt drowns me at the fact I brought him here and took him away from his mom for Christmas. He was hesitant in accepting anyway and that's why.

"You should have been with her today."

"No."

I peered over at him as he finally looked my way. His eyes were bright as he brought a hand up to softly cup the side of my face.

"For the first time in years I've actually enjoyed Christmas. It feels like I'm a little kid again." I gazed into his brown eyes as his thumb softly brushed my cheek. "All because of you."

"Me?" I croaked.

"You've brought a little bit of light back into my life."

Someone had to be cutting onions in here as my eyes welled with tears again.

"I'm glad to be here with you on Christmas." He said softly. If I wasn't a goner before I was now. "I also got you a gift."

"You did?" I sniffled a little. Logan let go of my face and got off the bed, going over to his suitcase. When he turned around he hid something behind his back.

"Here." Logan pulled his hand out from behind his back. My heart stopped in my chest at the sight of the stuffed panda bear. It was the same one from the gift shop at the hotel. He went back and got it?

"You looked like you really wanted it." He rubbed the back of his neck looking shy. I grabbed the panda feeling like my chest was going to explode. He seriously went back and got me the stuffed animal I wanted. And I knew he got it before things between us...shifted because I was with him after that.

"Logan." I looked down at the stuffed animal unable to form words. "I love it. Thank you." Again cue the water works.

The smile he gave me would have knocked me on my ass if I wasn't sitting down already. He was beautiful when he smiled. The fact that smile was directed at me just made my heart pound in my chest.

"Thank you for my gift. I'll make sure I wear it everyday."

"Preferably without a shirt on." I grinned right back at him. Laughing, he nodded his head.

"Sounds good."

We sat there for a minute before I gained the courage to ask.

"Would it be okay if I stayed here tonight?" Nothing sexual was going to happen. Not with my brother down the hall. I didn't want to leave Logan alone after everything. Plus I've gotten use to sleeping with him beside me.

"Of course. Come here."

Placing his present and mine on the desk next to the bed, Logan scooted back into the bed lifting the covers. The blow up bed moved under us as we crawled under the sheets. I couldn't help but giggle as I bounced to the side while Logan tried to get comfortable; his weight pushing the mattress down. He turned the lamp off as we settled in.

Once we were laying down Logan pulled me into his side, hooking his legs between mine with his arm around my waist. Placing my head on his bare chest I sighed softly, hearing his heart beating under me.

Words couldn't express how I felt laying with him like this. Wrapped in his arms feeling safe and warm. We fit perfectly together.

As we laid there the exhaustion from today started creeping in. Not sleeping after Logan's night terror last night and then all the excitement of being home was now hitting me full force. Add in relaxing feeling of Logan breathing beneath me and his thumb softly rubbing the bare skin of my back under my shirt.

My eyelids fluttered shut as I slowly lost the battle with sleep. I clung to Logan as I started drifting off.

"Merry Christmas Logan." I whispered. I felt a kiss on the top of my head followed by his voice.

"Merry Christmas Olivia."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Logan 

I gazed down at Olivia sleeping on my chest. I softly brushed a piece of hair out of her face, my heart contracting in my chest. She was absolutely beautiful, even sleeping.

The feeling building in my chest was unlike anything I've ever felt before. I thought I knew what it was like being in love with someone but I didn't. What I felt before was nothing like what I felt now as I stared at Olivia.

I knew I was attracted to Olivia the moment I met her. It grew as the years went on and when she kissed three years ago it had taken everything in me not to kiss her back and make her mine. I had tried to be a good friend and not fall for Knox's little sister. Moving away should have helped make my feelings go away but no matter what I did Olivia just kept popping in.

For years I've shoved aside my feelings not wanting to hurt Knox or Olivia. I thought I had my shit under control but when it came to the blonde laying on me, I had no ounce of control. I never would when it came to her.

Now as I gazed down at her I couldn't fight what I felt anymore. Olivia was meant for me. She always has been. How can I fight something that felt so fucking right.

For the first time in years I feel alive. That burning hole in my chest didn't hurt so bad when she was around. One little smile from her was enough to light my chest on fire.

Last night when I woke up over her with my hand around her throat I lost it. Just the thought of hurting her was enough to make me sick to my stomach. The amount of self hatred I felt in that moment. I never wanted her to ever see me like that. Yet in true Olivia fashion, she didn't care.

Didn't care that I could have hurt her while I was in the middle of a night terror. She didn't look at me in fear or like I was crazy. The understanding in her eyes almost brought me to my knees. I had waited for her to push me away but instead she wrapped her arms around me.

She had no idea how bad I fell for her right then. How her hug pieced a little broken part of me back together. For the first time in my life I felt like I could maybe be good enough for her.

And then today. The entire day she kept checking on me. Finding me in the room and giving me a look to make sure I was fine. Every single time I met her gaze I felt something building in my chest. That feeling growing all day as I watched her.

Watched her play with her nieces and nephew. Watched her interact with Colleen and Aubrey's brothers. She was like this beacon of light, lighting up whatever she touched. I had tried to keep my staring subtle but the knowing looks Aubrey and Colleen gave me I wasn't doing the best job. But I didn't care. I couldn't look away from her.

When Jackson left earlier he whispered in my ear something that's been playing on repeat ever since.

Don't let her go.

I hadn't planned on telling her about my mom. Hell Knox barely knew anything about her, yet I told Olivia everything. And honestly it felt nice telling someone the whole truth. For a long time I felt like I've kept my mother hidden, like a little secret. But she wasn't. She was my mom, even if she didn't remember me.

Earlier when I was talking to Knox the amount of guilt I felt was almost suffocating. I went behind his back and slept with his sister. When I first met Olivia, Knox made me promise not to do anything with his sister. He was explicit in not wanting me near her. And I tried. I tried so fucking hard to be a good guy.

The guilt I felt for not telling him about Olivia and I weighed on me all day. Before Olivia came into my room I even made up my mind that I would have to let her go. I couldn't hurt her relationship with her brother. I couldn't be that selfish. That was the plan until Liv came in here and further cemented my feelings.

How can I let her go? How can I let go of the only good thing in my life? I never thought in a million years I would feel like this for someone. Olivia came traipsing in and turned my whole world upside down and I wasn't even mad about it.

As I laid there watching her sleep I knew with every part of me that I couldn't let her go. Even if that meant ruining my friendship with Knox.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

*Cue Screaming*