Fan cover created by @Jaskeert

💫

Acacia/Ciarán - Age 16

Etain's eyes hold mine as she says, "I'm not going to be like everyone else and tell you I'm sorry you're hurt," she pauses a moment to shake her head and reiterate, "don't get me wrong, I am, but saying it over and over again isn't going to make the pain go away," when I say nothing she states, "I know you're hurt, but tell me what you feel...not how you feel."

I feel cold, my body stationing in a numbing state. When I reply to her, I'm quiet and say, "I feel fear, uncertainty...I feel like a part of me is no longer there..."

She nods and continues, "Do you feel anger to those who hurt you?"

"Yes...and also no...I feel anger for allowing myself to believe someone can be taken at face value," at these words, tears form in my eyes once again.

I never thought...Ciarán...

He'd ever do something like that...

Etain arches a brow and asks, "So it was those close to you, wasn't it?"

I avert my eyes from her, not knowing how trustworthy she is. Though she saved my life, she's Dante's niece and carries the same bloodline of which Ciarán does...

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to," I bring my gaze back to hers to see her shrugging as if it doesn't matter to her, though she reminds me, "just know that I'll listen if you do."

"My word means nothing," my voice is even quieter this time around.

Etain shakes her head and asks, "Dare I ask why your parents wouldn't believe you?"

"They've called me a liar in the past because my blood memories couldn't back up what I was telling them," it hurts when I explain this, because I shouldn't even have to in the first place.

"You've been marked; you know that, right?" Etain's eyes flash with something when I mention the blood memories, a small front from her wolf coming forward.

Shaking my head, I reply, "I was bitten several times-"

"One remains," she arches a brow. After she pauses a moment, rising from her chair she notes, "So here's the question, did this vampire choice mark you as their beloved?" My heart skips a beat at this, but she then continues with, "Or...are you dormant?"

Did Mercury...

...why?

Etain puts the chair away and nods, "Until the answer to that question comes to light, it's going to be hard for you."

"Why?" My voice is on edge.

She returns with, "Well...you'll feel the one-sided bond pull even greater as time goes on...considering the one who did this to you raped you, they took away your consent on both parts, so I'm sure you don't want to develop feelings for them. It's unavoidable sad to say, and even if you're dormant and the individual is your beloved...they force marked and raped you...not someone you would want to claim in return even if you were able to."

Her points are valid...

...wait, that means I'll be drawn to Mercury...?

Tears are in my eyes as I shake my head and cry out, "I don't want this!"

Etain releases a sigh and says, "Due to this being a one sided-bond, it can't be broken by a cheating betrayal as the bond isn't complete. Unless you can find an alpha that doesn't have a mate and would choice mark you...they're the only ones who can destroy a bond of any species by marking over the one already given," she shrugs her shoulders and is blatant when she remarks, "so, that'll be close to impossible."

At her brashness, I cry out, "Why would you say that?"

"I'm blunt and honest with you, Acacia," Etain moves a little closer to me, a golden glint reflecting off her irises, "or would you rather I spin you a fairytale of rainbows and unicorns? Would that help you sleep better at night?"

She is honest...

...one of the first people in my life to ever be and I just met her.

A question bubbles up though at the way she speaks, and I ask her, "Why are you this..." my voice trails off and I watch as she arches a brow, "...callus?"

Etain takes a step away from me as she and I both hear voices in the hallway outside the door. She tilts her head to the side as she holds herself with such strength and informs me, "I was raised within a pack of women who had to take on every gender-related role...I learned how to protect myself from the evils of this world, living in the northern mountains with the rest of the orphans and would be rogues that some packs didn't want to take in after their parents were killed," she pauses a moment before she breathes out sharply, "most importantly...I lost a lot of hope and optimism in this world when my mate was killed by a pack of rogues."

"I'm so-"

Etain cuts me off, "If I hear 'I'm sorry' come from your mouth, Acacia...then you have learned nothing from me."

My lips close and pull into a tight line. Nodding my head, I feel some sense of calm from talking with Etain however, I'm not ready to tell my parents about who hurt me...because I don't know if they'll believe it's a lie.

"She's okay, right?!"

He has no right!

The door opens slightly, and I see Etain's gaze travel to it. No one comes through because Dante is the one guarding Ciarán against entering...but I hear him snarl back, "You were supposed to protect her!"

"It's not my fault!" Ciarán snaps right back, and my ears bleed with the way his lie unfolds, "we were attacked by a warlock when we were getting ready to leave...Acacia ran, and I thought she found shelter somewhere-"

"SHE WAS RAPED!" Dante's voice is loud and shatters the way my heart beats evenly.

Ciarán is not as loud, but he's quick to argue, "I didn't know where she went! We were separated! I lost my fucking wolf from the warlock's magic to let her run so she wouldn't get hurt so I'm sorry I can't control everything!"

I hadn't noticed the way Etain's eyes were staring at me in a sideways glance until I finally bring my gaze to meet with hers.

"We'll discuss that at the next council meeting..." Dante's voice holds danger; however, he does state, "...I know you're worried about your sister, but she does not want any males around her right now, and you need to respect that."

There's silence before Ciarán replies, "I get it...I'm here if she needs me."

I'm going to be sick...

I quietly ask Etain, "Why were you by yourself then? Isn't that what rogues do...?"

The door shuts quietly, and Etain turns to me replying, "I am an envoy for the Mercy Matrons...I'm allowed on any pack territory so long as the alpha is given the word of my arrival. I collect pups that have no family, and the pack doesn't want to raise them...it's sad, but there are packs like that."

"Oh..." my voice trails off.

"Did you want to talk about anything else?" Etain asks me, and I remain silent. After a few moments, she nods and says, "You should focus on getting some rest and healing."

"Thank you," I say softly as she walks away from me toward the door.

She calls over her shoulder, "You're welcome."

My sleep is restless, nightmares crawling and invading my dreams as memories flashback. His bloody red irises bore into my mind, my blood on his lips as I recall every word he said to me...

...I'm nothing. I'm worthless. I'll never be worth anything more than a tool to be used by him...

I wake up crying, but it's been a few days, and I'm no longer in the medical wing. When my eyelids snap open, tears fresh down my cheeks, it's dad's form I see sitting in a chair while he's asleep. My sniffling and shallow breathing causes him to stir, and his eyelids immediately snap open and his eyes land on me.

He's out of his chair and at my side, looking me over as he says calmly, "I love you."

"Daddy..." my voice is so small as I press my head against his chest, feeling his arms gently wrap around me. I breathe out and cry, just holding onto him as I cry myself back to sleep.

It's another day, and I know...

...school.

Dante is the one to knock on my doorframe as I slowly gather my belongings to bring with me. My bag is packed, my eyes finally not swollen and red for the first time since everything...

"We're going to be leaving in just a bit little one," he tells me, and when I say nothing, he asks, "may I come in?"

Nodding my head, I finish my books, and I release a very uneven breath. Dante comes toward me, and I flinch away when his hand touches my shoulder. He's quick to retract his hand and apologizes while also saying, "Etain has agreed to spend time at Meliorist Sanctum and represent my eyes and ears. She won't always be there, but it's someone who you can confide in when needed."

"Thank you," is all I say, wondering just how much Etain will be around. It doesn't matter though, at least her presence there might spark others to stay in line.

Dante takes my bag, and we both head into the hallway. We walk down the stairs, dad and mom waiting at the bottom along with Ciarán and Etain. My eyes avert from Ciarán's, and I say goodbye to dad, hardly even giving my mom a second look.

We're in the car driving, Ciarán up front with Dante while Etain remains beside me. Her eyes are cautious as she follows my movements and I wonder if she's trying to analyze me...if she is, I give her nothing to work with, hiding behind a wall of pain that only I can feel.

When we arrive at the school, Dante and Ciarán exit the car, Etain placing her hand on my forearm and I immediately hyperventilate...though she's quick to remove her touch as she says, "I can only begin to understand once you let me in."

"I don't want anyone in...not now..." my voice is uneven as I steady my breathing and my heart rate.

Etain nods and replies, "That, I do understand."

We exit the car, Dante informing Etain that he's going to show her around the campus, so she's aware of everything. Dante asks me, "You're okay to unpack in your dorm?"

"Yes," I reply with one word, holding the handle of my bag before I start to walk away.

I hardly get the chance to though, because Dante gently says, "I love you."

"Love you too," my response is very automated as I don't even turn around to hug him. I walk away from them all, Ciarán having gone ahead the moment he stepped out of the car. I'm walking the familiar pathways as I look through foggy glasses that are my eyes.

Everything passes me by, and I drone out all the sounds of those excited to start the new year. Everything set back into place which was once wrong...nothing for others to fear except what they make of it.

"Acacia!" His voice breaks through my haze. His voice turns a different note when I don't look at Rian, "Acacia?"

I don't stop walking though, and it's not until he touches my arm that I recoil and cry out, "No!"

My eyes meet his as I take a step to the side, my body shaking slightly as he furrows his brows with concern. He tilts his head to the side, scratching the back of it while asking, "Did I do something wrong? I-"

He cuts himself short when he notices...

Tears are in my eyes as Rian stutters, "Th-That ca-can't be..." his voice is painful as he says, "...you're my beloved...Acacia-"

"I'm nothing!" I shout at him, and I draw a few stares in our direction. My gaze glances around at those whispering before scurrying off to where they're heading.

Tears fall from my eyes as I whisper out, "I am nothing...Rian...I..." shaking my head, I can't stop the tears from falling down my cheeks.

"Who?" Rian asks, trying so hard to keep his temper...though I don't understand why he's angry. He holds it back, turning my face away from him as I start walking toward my dorm building. His hands draw into fists as I've only seen this side of him when we'd blown the top off the feeding station operation, and he cries out, "Who?! Acacia!"

I block him out completely, moving toward the dorm building from the side...

...everything falls out of place around me, my steps faltering as I press my hand against the back wall of the building after ducking out of sight for a moment. I close my eyelids and breathe in and out, trying to calm myself.

I'm almost coming down from my panic when it skyrockets all over again...

Ciarán is in front of me; his eyes narrowed with a dark glare. His words are firm when he states, "If you ever tell anyone...I will kill you, Acacia."

I fight back the tears as my voice comes out watery, "I-I-"

He cuts me off though when his voice takes a dangerous tone, "You're the heir to the throne...but a puppet queen you'll become," he moves closer to me, and I flinch when his fingers grasp my chin...though he hands me a black cellphone and states, "you keep this on you at all times, and you will do exactly what I and anyone else say and never question anything ever asked of you. You will be my face while actions taken are not your own."

I'm nodding profusely now as his grip tightens, his eyes staring into mine...

...he has no wolf.

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

Song selected by lovely_undifined she's been telling me for many chapters that this song represents our Acacia.
Lovely by Billie Eilish & Khalid

💫--To Be Continued--💫
-Updates on Mondays & Thursdays-

Fandom Pack: TheRegiisHibriziPack where everyone and anyone is welcome to join.

If I'm not able to, the comments are monitored and responded to by members of the:

⊷☽☾⊶
☽The Leomi Eislyn Pack☾
Vici0usWhisper 
Apache_Bear 
Beta6984 
MsEmmaJane 
lovely_undifined 
amandagn394
jazzybear12514 
Esha_01 
Sarcastic__Mimi 
sammi1993wilson 
TimaAnysa 
xXVitanaXx 
Smol_queer_bean
rosebudnena