Chapter 13

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"Where do you want to go next?" I asked Rose holding her hand as we walked through the mall. I wanted to spend as much time as I could with her hoping to clear my mind away from Nathan. Knowing it probably wasn't smart considering I have less than a week to kill him but right now all I wanted to think about was spending time with Rose.

"Can we go to Build-A-Bear?" Rose asked. "Only if we can go into the Disney store after." I smiled making her giggle excitedly before we walked into the store making me put her down. Knowing she just received lots of gifts from Christmas I didn't want to spoil her too much. Rose walked up to the different types of plushies before picking a light brown fuzzy bunny.

We continued to walk through the mall towards the Disney store with her hand in mine as she drank a juice box in her other. I held her Build-A-Bear Workshop box along with our other shopping bags in my free hand. "Auntie Stephanie took me to see this movie when it came out! It was so fun." Rose giggled as she held a Lion King toy.

I couldn't help but feel a sharp pain of hurt at Stephanie spending more time with her than I was able to. It pained me more than anything being away from Rose so often only able to see her on her birthday and holidays. But I knew It's what I needed to do to have the life I never had growing up. She deserved all the things I've never had, and I didn't want her to have the life I did.

Kneeling down to her level as she looked eagerly through all the toys to pick her favorite. "I promise to take you to the next Disney movie to come out." I smiled as she looked up at me with a bright smile making me kiss her forehead.

"You can't base your happiness on whether someone else is happy. Do whatever makes you happy." Valerie's familiar voice said from somewhere near by making me stand trying to find them. "I am happy, Val." Nathan's voice rung behind me making me squeeze my eyes shut. Hoping I would blend in with the crowds of other parents and laughing children.

"Obviously." Valerie replied sarcastically as I thought about why Nathan would be here with his sister. "Have you found a toy yet?" I asked Rose wanting to leave quickly until I heard them call my name. "Carmen?" Valerie asked making me widen my eyes trying to hide my worry as I turned around.

"Hey." I breathed. "What are you doing here?" I looked at the both of them through a smile. Nathan stared at me with a puzzled expression seeing right through my fake demeanor to hide my nerves. Before either of them could answer I felt Rose pulling at my jeans as she spoke. "Can I get two?" She whined up at me making me frown looking away from them.

"I told you one. Santa just gave you lots of toys." I replied making her furrow her eyebrows in annoyance. Crossing her arms in protest. "But I can't choose." Rose whined. "I've already thought of their names." She continued. Rose held two stuffed animals one under her arm and the other in her free hand to show me. I looked up at them clearing my throat.

"This is Rose." I smiled as I placed my hand on her dark brown hair. Valerie smiled brightly down at her making Rose smile back weakly showing off her dimples. "Hi, Rose! I'm Valerie." She smiled bending down slightly. I looked up at Nathan to see him trying to figure out what was going on before looking down at Rose again as she spoke.

"Is she your niece?" Valerie asked making me part my lips to explain. "Who are these people, mommy?" She asked looking up at me. Rose was nervous around them as she looked up at him shyly. I filled with worry but pushed it aside not wanting to upset Rose. Valerie hid her shock well a soft smile as I held Rose's hand. "This is Mr. Vanderbilt and his sister, Valerie." I explained making her smile knowing Rose felt intimidated.

"Do I still have to put one back?" Rose asked. "No, honey that's fine." I answered making her smile brightly again before Nathan finally spoke taking me by surprise. "You have a kid?" Nathan asked making Valerie glair at him smacking his shoulder lightly.

"Would you like to meet my nephew, Jason? I think he has some toys to share with you." Valerie said making her shake her head quickly hiding behind me peeking her head around. "My mom says I shouldn't talk to strangers." Rose replied as she wrapped her arm around my leg making me smile down at her. "It's okay, honey. She's nice. Go have fun." I said bending down before she hesitantly gave in handing me one of her stuffed animals and walked away with Valerie.

I watched her laugh with a little boy around her age as Valerie and Jane, smiled with them. "Why didn't you tell me you have a kid?" Nathan asked quickly making me look over at him. "It never came up. And it isn't any of your concern. It still isn't." I answered making sure to look over at Rose every once and while not liking the idea of her away from me.

"Why did Nick lie?" Nathan asked. "I asked him to." I replied. "Where's her father?" He continued hesitantly after a short uncomfortable pause. "No idea. He was just a one night stand I had a few years ago." I lied looking away. "He didn't want anything to do with us." I answered as his features morphed into sadness and confusion.

"You've been raising her on your own?" He asked. Looking away hating seeing him pity me. My heart ached remembering how it was right after Rose was born. I was alone trying to take care of a newborn baby and all the books and blogs I read could only help so much. And at the time I knew if anyone found out about her, they would use her to get to me.

So, when she was a year old, I decided to leave her with my brother and Stephanie until I was able to leave my job. Which was the hardest decision I have ever had to make. It nearly killed me.

"This is why I didn't tell anyone. The last thing I wanted was everyone pitting me and walking on eggshells around the woman who is raising her daughter alone." I continued full of annoyance as I walked away towards Jane and Valerie. "Carmen-" Nathan yelled out but I ignored him.

"Thanks for letting them play but we really should be going." I said with a weak smile making Valerie about to reply when Rose spoke up at me. "Do we have to, mommy? Can't we play a little longer?" Rose asked sadly making it difficult to tell her no when Valerie spoke.

"Maybe we can plan a play date for them. I'm sure you'd love to see all of Jason's toys at home." She smiled down at Rose. I gave Valerie a small smile grateful towards her making this easier. I knelt to her height as she looked at me with pleading eyes making it even more difficult to tell her no. "How about we go get milkshakes after I buy your new stuffies." I negotiated. I pulled out her Nemo stuffed animal she handed me earlier tapping the stuffed animal lightly around her face mimicking kisses making her giggle and close her eyes.

"And you promised Uncle Nick, we would teach him how to make our famous snickerdoodles." I continued making her nod in excitement as she took Nemo from me. Standing up from my squat as I grabbed our shopping bags and Rose's small, warm hand. I looked up to see Nathan was staring at us, but I couldn't make out his masked features as I spoke. "It was nice running into you guys." I smiled making them nod.

"I'll ask Nathan for your number to set up that playdate." Valerie said as we began to leave the store after paying. "Bye Mr. Vegetable Belt." Rose beamed making me turn to him as Valerie and Jane laughed. Nathan smiled obviously not used to talking to children making me chuckle.

Nathan's POV

"She absolutely adorable." Jane gushed as we left the store after her son got the toys he wanted. "I didn't know she had a child." Valerie said as I continued to go over everything that had just happened. "Me neither." I replied in deep thought as Jane and Valerie looked at each other in silence.

Finding out Carmen was a mother was the last thing I was expecting from her. I knew ever since we met that she hid things very well from everyone around her. But I still found it odd that she didn't at least have pictures of her on her desk. I thought about how strong she must've been to decide to raise a child on her own with that coward of a man who didn't want anything to do with them.

The thought of him leaving Carmen alone like that made me want to do more than just break his knees. And the feelings towards Carmen to suddenly care and protect her were uncomfortable and unfamiliar. Never experiencing this type of concern for anyone before struggling to shake off these thoughts.

"You better not fire her just because you just found out she has a daughter." Valerie said sternly snapping me back to where I was. She was watching tv on the couch as the light from the tv was all that illuminated her in the dark. "Of course not." I replied without emotion making her nod. "Could you imagine the lawsuit if I did." I continued trying not to show how I really felt making her scoff disappointed in me.

"Right, I forgot that's all you ever think about." I ignored her as I continued to leave. Sighing heavily pouring myself a stiff drink. "Not lately."


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