3 Years Later.... (this means five years with the last bonus chapter. Alex is 23 and Riley is 22)

Song above is...Lost Without You by Freya Ridings. Fits this chapter so well!

No missed calls.

Sighing I placed my phone back down on the table. I stared out the window the coffee shop feeling completely hopeless, the rainy weather matching my mood. Its been two weeks. Two weeks without seeing or hearing from Alex. Two weeks since we took a break. But it didn't feel like a break. No it felt like a breakup.

Today is probably the first time in the two weeks that I haven't bawled my eyes out. Only because I now felt numb. I've bee living in a haze where nothing really mattered anymore. How can it when I felt like my heart had been ripped from my chest.

I never imagined we'd be here. It's always been Alex and I against the world. He's by my side for the past five years and now he isn't. Sure we've had our problems and arguments but after a bit both of us would apologize and we'd be okay. But this time....it felt different this time. I mean its been two weeks since we last talked and saw each other. We've never gone this long before.

I had known things were a bit rough lately. Both of us juggling our new jobs and life after graduating. I just started my new job at a high school and Alex had started at the company with Noah and Mason. He's been more stressed lately and grumpier but starting a new job and life was bound to be hard.

When he got home from work two weeks ago he was more snappy than normal. I had asked what was wrong only for him to snap me telling me to mind my own business. The words just set me off. Everything that had piled up the last few weeks now came to head.

We got in a yelling match. Both of us saying things we didn't mean but in the moment things were too heated. I called him selfish for being at work so much. He called me too needy.

By the end of our screaming match Alex packed a couple of bags and left. I was pretty sure he was staying at Noah's place not too far from here while I stayed in our empty apartment alone.

I knew the moment our friends found out cause my phone started blowing up. I was stuck in bed crying that I didn't answer a single message. Wasn't until Lexi was threatening to break down the door did I get up. The moment I saw Lexi I broke down all over again.

Lexi stayed with me the rest of the day until Liv showed up. She drove forty minutes to come see me. The three of us sat in my bed, eating ice cream and watching the Vampire Diaries.

I laid in bed for three days straight before the both of them forced me up and into the shower. I had thought Alex would call or come home after the first three days but when he didn't it just broke me all over again.

Both Liv and Lexi told me to give it time. That Alex would be back and we'd work it out. But the longer we went without talking I wasn't sure we could.

Eventually Liv had to go back home since the hospital kept calling. I had to force myself to get up and go to work even though I still felt like laying bed all day.

Without Liv around Lexi came by every day to check up on me. I didn't miss the concern look on her face when she came by. I knew in the last two weeks I have gotten thinner and the bags under my eyes bigger. I couldn't bring myself to eat much or sleep. I had gotten so use to sleeping next to Alex I was lost without him.

I stared down at the promise ring on my finger. The same promise ring he gave me five years ago. I've worn it everyday since then. The sight of it made my heart ache even more.

I wanted to call him. Apologize and tell him to come home but I stopped every time my finger hovered over his name. I was afraid. Afraid that if I called he wouldn't pick up or if he did that he'd tell me we really were over. That our relationship was no longer worth fighting for. That was my biggest fear. So every time I stopped myself.

I loved Alex. He is literally my other half and the thought of him being done with me hurt more than anything I've ever felt. I didn't even want to imagine a world without Alex.

Earlier I had to get out of the apartment. Being there alone was just causing me to go crazy. All I could see was Alex and I in it. Didn't help I could smell his cologne everywhere. So to get away I went down the coffee shop around the corner.

While it was a Saturday the place wasn't that busy. I was able to nab a window seat and I haven't moved since. That was over thirty minutes ago. A part of me wanted to text Noah and ask how Alex is doing but I couldn't even bring myself to do that. Noah texted me a few days ago but I haven't heard much since. I know he'd choose Alex if we were to break up. They were brothers after all.

I felt so lost. I didn't want to bother Lexi or Liv anymore with my emotional drama, I couldn't really bring myself to talk to Derek or Nico because I knew they were Alex's friends first even if though we are close. I couldn't call my brother or even Nicholas because they were thousand of miles away and unable to use the phone. Plus if I told them about Alex and I my brother would march home and give Alex a good beating for hurting his sister.

What I really wanted was to call my mom. To have her tell me things would be okay and that Alex and I were strong enough to get through this. But I couldn't call my mom. After our blow out last year I haven't spoken to her or my father.

Alex and I were out having a cute date night about a year ago, just walking down the street when someone up ahead caught my attention. They looked so familiar that I had pulled Alex closer to them to get a better look. The person turned just then for me to see it wasn't just a stranger...it was my mom. And the person on her arm was not my father.

All I could do was watch as she giggled, yes giggled, up at this man with a look of pure love on her face. I haven't seen my mother that happy in...I don't even know how long.

Along with cheating on my father she was out here living her life like she didn't have two kids back home. Two kids she basically abandoned without a second glance. It hurt to see her so happy. To see her parading around the streets of Portland like nothing else mattered. Like I didn't matter.

I didn't have to even say a word for Alex to wrap his arm around me and steer me back home. As soon as I stepped foot in our apartment this wave of anger just hit me. All the anger I have held in at my parents was wanting to burst free. Years of feeling hurt and unwanted by them making my whole body shake.

Alex didn't stop me from grabbing my phone and calling my mom. Surprisingly she answered on the second ring and as soon as I heard her voice I exploded.

Everything I had bottled up for years came rushing out and there was no stopping it. Come to find out my mom had been cheating on my dad for years AND my father was cheating on my mom as well. They both knew and were fine with it. Neither caring how their own children would react if they ever found out.

When my mom told me I was being a bit dramatic over the whole thing I was done. I knew right then that there was no changing my parents. There was no chance of them coming home to be actual parents again, not that they have been for years. No that job was dropped onto Trent.

I ended the call and officially cut my parents off. It wasn't even a difference in my life either. I spent the last few years without them that nothing felt different. When I called Trent crying about it he let me cry before saying the same thing that I felt. We didn't need them. Haven't needed them in years. As long as we had each other it didn't matter. I had Trent and that was all I needed.

Its been almost a year since that call and I haven't heard from either of them and I never tried to reach out. But right now I wanted someone to talk to. Someone to make me feel better.

Grabbing my phone again I found myself clicking the number and putting it up to my ear. As soon as I heard her voice on the other side of the phone tears gathered in my eyes again.

"Hi sweetie." Ava greeted.

"Hey." I whispered.

"Oh honey." By her tone I knew she knew about Alex and I. "Are you doing okay?" I thought about lying but I didn't have it in me to.

"No not really." I wiped at a lone tear that ran down my cheek.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" At the motherly tone I found myself spilling everything to her. Everything from Alex pulling away from me, the words we said to each other, how alone and lost I felt.

By time I was done I was once again crying sitting alone at a coffee shop like a weirdo.

"Oh sweetie I'm sorry. I know it doesn't feel like it right now but things are going to be okay." She said the words I wanted to hear. Ava may not be my real mom but she treated me like her own daughter. "You and Alex have been through so much together that this will just be a bump in the road."

"It doesn't feel like a bump though." I sniffled as I wiped at my face.

"The thing no one ever tells you is that love isn't suppose to be easy. It's not sunshine and rainbows. It's arguments over stupid things, its getting on each others nerves. Its accepting the other persons flaws and loving them regardless." Ava explained.

"Neither Alex or you are perfect. You both have faults but that's what makes you you. You love Alex despite his, and he loves you despite yours. The two of you are going to fight and say things you don't really mean but you'll work it out. You always do." Even though she couldn't see me I nodded along.

"I know Alex and I know he'll come to his sense soon. He loves you so much that he won't let you go. Like you won't let him go. I promise things will work out." Ava promised.

Her words meant everything right now. The fact that she picked up the phone meant everything. Over the years Ava has become that steady 'parent' in my life. Someone I can call up and ask a question to. Someone who always invites me to family gatherings and always makes sure I am involved. I've never been more thankful to meet someone.

"Thank you Ava. I didn't know who to call and I saw your name." I mumbled.

"Riley you can call me anytime you want. I'll always be here."

"Thank you." I breathed, hoping she could tell how thankful I really was that she was here for me and that she answered the phone.

"Anytime sweetie."

After saying our goodbyes I felt better. Having someone like Ava tell me things would be okay seemed to ease the weight off my shoulders a bit.

Realizing that I have been sitting here for the past hour and a half I decided I better go home. The thought of going back to the empty apartment hurt, knowing I would just be reminded of Alex.

I made the short walk back to the apartment, practically dragging my feet as I did so. I was exhausted as I climbed the stairs but I knew I wouldn't get any sleep again tonight. I've only managed to get a few hours a night since Alex left but even then I didn't sleep well.

With a sigh I stepped into the apartment. Like the last two weeks I was met with silence. The familiar ache settled in my chest as I shut the door behind me. Moving towards the kitchen I suddenly noticed the light was on. Pretty sure I turned it off before I left I turned the corner only to stop dead in my tracks.

Standing there looking directly at me was Alex.

My heart stopped in my chest at the sight, not expecting him to be here.

"Hi." He greeted, his voice low and hoarse.

"Hi." I echoed my own voice barely a whisper. All of my emotions were running through me so fast I wasn't sure what I wanted to do. I wanted to run into his arms and plead with him to never leave again. Another part wanted to hold my ground to see that him being away for two weeks hurt me. That his decision to leave instead of talk was the result of all of this.

We stood there just staring at one another not saying a word. I noticed the scruffy beard on his face, along with how thin his cheeks looked. The bags under his eyes matched my own. The brown hair that I loved to run my fingers through was all messy like he ran his hands through it moments ago. All in all he looked just as bad as I did. It shouldn't have made me feel better but it did. At least I wasn't the only one suffering.

"Why are you here?" I broke the silence first, wrapping my arms around my middle. Was he here to grab his stuff? Alex was quiet for a moment, his eyes looking over me like I just did seconds before.

"I want to be home." His voice was guff as his eyes met mine once more. The pain that filled them almost brought my to my knees but I held steady.

"It's been two weeks."

"I know."

"Two weeks without a call or a text." My hands tightened around my waist, my nail bitting through my shirt into my skin.

"I know I was a dick Ri. I shouldn't have said those things to you and I shouldn't have left." I know he was but I had to know why. He's never left before after an argument yet this time he did.

"Why did you leave?" My voice was small as I asked. I kept my eyes on him as he swallowed and looked down.

"A few days before..." we both knew what he was talking about. "I got a letter from my parents." His parents?

"Apparently I was suppose to get the letter when I turned 21 but the lawyer misplaced it or something. They left me all of it." The pain in his eyes got worse making me take a step forward

"All of it?"

"Their half of the company with Ava and Mason, as well as some other business I didn't know they had. They left it all to me like they knew they were going to die but that's not it." Alex shook his head. "They made the decision for me." His voice broke at the end making my resolve crumble.

In a few strides I was in front of him, wrapping my arms around his waist as his own came around mine. He cried into my shoulder as if everything was finally coming to the surface.

"They didn't even care if I wanted to be in the business or not. They just assumed I'd take over." I understood why he was so upset about it. In a way his parents made his future decision for him by making him 'heir' to their company. If he hadn't already made the choice what would have happened? He'd have to choose between taking over for his family or whatever job he would have had. A job he would have chosen for himself, not them.

I knew this felt like a blow to the gut for him. Ever since his parents died he's been alone taking care of his sister. Having to step up and navigate the world by himself. Yes Ava and Mason were there but they couldn't make the decisions for him. He loved them so much and by doing this it feels like they've taken his choices away.

I held him just a bit tighter.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I whispered. "You know you can tell me anything."

"I know I just felt so angry and hurt." He slowly pulled away to look down at me. "Everything just seemed to explode in front of me and I just..." He trailed off.

"I know."

"I am so sorry baby. I'm never leaving again I swear it." Alex placed his forehead against mine. He brought his hands up to cup my cheeks. "These last two weeks have been hell. I never want to know what life is like without you."

"I don't either." Once again tears ran down my face. "Never leave me again."

"Never again." His thumbs wiped at tears running down my cheeks. Our eyes met as he pulled back. His own were lined with tears.

"I love you."

"Love you too."

When our lips met the crack in my heart healed and I felt whole again. 

(Having to write them breaking up hurt my heart so much. I wouldn't have been able to handle if they really broke up)