CHAPTER 11

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I remembered it when I woke up, how I'd broken down into hysterical sobs because Demi had seen through me so easily. I figured if I never said anything then no one would ever find out about what Blu did, it would just be another secret, but one screw up, one tiny, seemingly insignificant scar, was enough for Demi to realize exactly what I'd been through, because he'd been through it too.

Obviously, it made me feel like crap. He was put through electroshock therapy for "conditioning" because he sacrificed his freedom to keep me safe, only to wake up and discover I screwed over his sacrifice and got hurt anyway. Go me, I rocked.

What's worse, during my breakdown I said some very stupid shit. Like Ronnie's name. Wow I am an idiot. Somehow, I spent years with that bit of information safely tucked into the back of my mind where the trauma could fester into a major mental disorder like it should, but one freak out had me spilling my guts. Oh and of course it gets worse, because Maggie was right the fuck there and heard everything.

If her reaction was any indicator, she had no idea Ronnie was gone until that moment. What's the best way to keep my mouth shut? Super glue? Fantastic, I needed a lot of that.

Covers and sheets were thrown over me, my head was cradled in a few of the pillows that were on the bed, and Demi was still lying next to me, seemingly fast asleep on his back with his arms crossed over his stomach. I rubbed at my eyes with the heel of my palm, wincing from the irritating burn caused by how much I'd cried the night before. No one else seemed to be in the room, so I pushed myself up and pushed the covers back away from me, looking for my shoes, scarf, and hat I'd been wearing.

Besides those three items, I was still fully dressed, inching towards the edge of the bed but freezing up when someone grabbed my arm.

"Don't even think about it," Demi grumbled, and I winced, looking over my shoulder to see him peering up at me with narrowed eyes.

I quickly turned away, hunching my shoulders, "Um... I, um.... Shower."

"Uh-huh," he released me only so he could push himself up, wincing a little and rubbing his head, "You're not leaving my sight until Arthur looks over you, and I mean entirely. No fibbing your way out of a full exam."

I winced and rubbed my arm, looking down, "I really am okay. Just... kind of sore."

"Don't, Dakota," Demi scolded me, "I've been through it, that man is savage, he could have broken or fractured something in your hips, it's happened to me before. Are you having trouble walking? Is it painful?"

"I mean, no more than when Rhett...," I paused, shrugging, "Just, the usual I guess. It's not that bad, just sore, and... there are gross bruises on my thighs, they're... kind of black, but they're not bad."

"Dakota," Demi sighed, pushing himself forward a little, "Why did you go back after you got out?"

I gave him a panicky look, "I didn't want to leave you there alone," I choked, "I'm so sorry, I know you risked a lot getting me out, but I felt sick at the idea of just leaving like that! I wanted to help, I figured I could help, so I jacked a car and crashed through the front door."

Demi gaped at me, one corner of his lips twitching up, "That sounds kind of awesome, actually," he forced the frown back into place, "I'm still mad."

I shrugged, "Well, they tried torturing me for information after that, but when I wouldn't talk, they knocked me out and I woke up in... you know, his room. It only happened once," I assured, "When I woke up Carter was there. He helped me up, gave me clothes, brought me down to where you were being held and helped us get out. He gave us a jeep filled with supplies and directions on the safest route away from their base. I mean, all of that, the car, he'd been saving it for himself, but he gave it up so we could get away!"

Demi was staring down, his brows drawn in distress, "Was he okay?" he asked, and I nodded slowly.

"Yea, when we left he was fine, he said he'd be fine. I asked him to come with us but he said he couldn't yet. The way he looked though, he wanted to leave, but something must be keeping him there. He did say he was sneaking vital Con Rồng information to outside sources, probably Tobias Florian. Maybe he thinks he still needs to do that?"

"He doesn't," Demi muttered before shaking his head, "Never mind, we can worry about Carter later. I... think it's about time we returned the favor of saving our lives."

"Yea," I agreed, silently hoping I'd distracted him enough that he'd forget about my exam.

Not so much.

"Come on, let's get you to Arthur," he said, pushing the covers back, and I winced.

"You've been unconscious for days, you should lie back down and rest. You probably have a headache."

"An agonizing migraine, don't change the subject," he held his hand out and I sighed, standing up and shuffling around the bed to stand with him.

I wasn't surprised that Arthur was already awake in the empty infirmary, looking through a few papers on a clipboard with a pen between his lips, eyes lifting when the door opened and pulling the pen from his mouth, frowning.

"Demi, what are you doing up?"

"Making sure this one doesn't sneak off to hide somewhere before you can look him over," Demi said, pushing me forward.

I looked nervously around the room, rubbing my arm, "He isn't here, right?" I asked, and Arthur smiled softly.

"Orion and his group have been confined to house arrest until we get this sorted out," he explained, and I slowly relaxed, though Demi looked puzzled.

"Who?"

"You remember Carina?" I asked, and Demi pressed his lips together, "When we got out I drove us into their territory. Carina and his group helped us."

"I see. I guess I should be grateful then," he folded his arms as Arthur lead me over to a cot, "So last night, I thought I recognized Carina, with that chick who said she was your sister?"

I frowned heavily and sat on the edge of the cot, arms crossing over my stomach as Demi stood beside me, "She wasn't lying," I said, "That's Maggie. I mentioned her to you."

Demi nodded slowly, "You said both your sisters were dead."

"I thought they were. Maggie is the oldest, she was in college when the bombs fell, and the college itself was bombed a few hours after the first fly by, so she had enough time to get away," I paused before adding, "I really did think she was dead, I wasn't expecting her to show up in Carina's group."

"No kidding," Demi hummed as Arthur pulled the curtain closed before pointing at me.

"Pants off," he ordered, and I grumbled as stood up, my face burning as I pushed my jeans from my hips, leaving the boxers on because like hell I was giving up what little pride I had left.

With just the jeans gone, it was easy to see the horrid bruises all along my thighs, ravaging my skin all the way down towards my knees, Demi's expression twisted up before he looked away, hands in tight, shaking fists at his sides. Arthur walked over with a pillow that he set on the head of the cot, patting it.

"Lie down on your stomach, alright? I'm going to check your hips to make sure there are no breaks or fractures."

"There aren't," I muttered defiantly as I stretched out over the cot and curled my arms under the pillow, setting my chin on it and pouting as Demi pulled a chair to the head of the cot and sat down so he could still see my face, reaching out to play with my hair.

"What else?" he asked, "Last night you mentioned someone named Ronnie. That's the name carved into your pocket knife, right?"

I buried my face in the pillow so he couldn't see the pain on my face, wondering if I should reply or just follow Logan's example and become a mute. In the end, I couldn't really give Demi the silent treatment. I'd held it in long enough, if anyone deserved to hear this story, it was Demi. Besides, Beckett said talking about it made it easier to get over, and maybe if I could finally get over what happened, I wouldn't be such a brat.

"Ronnie Navarro," I said, lifting my head a bit so my voice wasn't muffled in the pillow, "He was my neighbor, and his family went to the same church as mine did. We met after one of the sermon's, I didn't even know he was my neighbor at first because my mom never really let me out of the house, and she didn't like most of the kids at my school because their parents were heathenistic blasphemers," I curled my fingers in exaggeration when I quoted my mom, and Demi arched his eyebrows up to his hairline.

"Slut was crazy," I explained simply, folding my arms under the pillow again, "Anyway, she didn't like Ronnie or his family at all, because they weren't conservative psychos like her. They were... good people. Ronnie was my age, and we went to school together, the same church, our rooms were basically right next to each other, so he would sneak out in the middle of the night and climb the tree outside my window to hang out, we would watch the stars from the roof, it was fun.

"I came out to him before I even considered talking to my own family, and he flipped a lid. Not because he was all ewe gays, but because he liked me and wanted us to go out," my cheeks burned from the memory of how he had grabbed my hands, shaking them, and pleading with me to say yes, "We were together five months before the world went to hell. The day the bombs fell, it was Sunday, I remember because it was just after church.

"Ronnie's older brother, Josie, drove us home, he wanted to stay but he had work, that day I decided I wanted to come out to my mom and dad, and to Gracie. Ronnie and Josie really hated the idea, because they both knew my mom was a psycho bitch, but I... I figured... everything would be okay. So, I came out to them and my dad and Grace were fine, they already knew I guess, but my mom started screaming, she threw a fucking lamp," I hid my face in the pillow, taking a breath in before I could continue.

"She threw me out," I said, lifting my head back up, "Told me to get out, basically disowned me, so Ronnie dragged me out of the house, tried to calm me down. We were at the sidewalk and heard this... weird whistling noise. My house was... the first one hit. There was nothing left. If I'd been inside a few more minutes, I'd be gone too. My mother disowning me was what saved my life.

"I was in shock and I wanted to just sit there, I didn't want to move, but Ronnie started dragging me down the street towards Josie's work. We were maybe halfway there when another bomb hit, a building started crumbling, and Ronnie shoved me out of the way. He... he was crushed, I couldn't move him, there was... so much blood, and he just... slipped away," I was crying now, not ugly sobs like the night before, but silent tears that made my vision blur.

My voice was somehow steady as I continued my explanation, "I could've kept going," I said, "Found Josie, told him what happened, but... how could I live with that? His brother was dead because of me, I was too scared to face him, so I started walking in the other direction and just... didn't stop. I really have no idea how long I walked, but my shoes were fucked, I was starving, exhausted. That's when I met Kailas," I buried my face in the pillow, "That's who Ronnie was..."

Before Demi could speak I jerked forward with a sharp yelp, hissing through my teeth as Demi reached out to hold my shoulders and Arthur lifted his hands from my left hip, "I'm sorry," he apologized before his hands moved back to my hip, "Ah, you have a minor stress fracture along your hip, but nothing too serious, thankfully. I'm glad I found it though, these can become very major problems if they're not treated."

I huffed and dropped my face into the pillow as Demi rubbed my shoulders, "I've had those," he said to me, "They won't kill you."

"Fan-fuckin-tastic," I grumbled as Arthur hummed.

"This does confine you to bed, though," he admitted, "and if you really need to walk around, you're forbidden from putting weight on your left leg, even a little. I'm sure we can find crutches somewhere. I'm almost done looking you over. After this I want to change your bandages, then you're going right to your room."

"Yes, mom," I said sarcastically, and Demi snickered a little behind his hand.

Arthur just hmphed, "If what you said about your biological mother is true, then fine, I'm your mom now. Gods know no one else is going to keep you and the rest of these reckless idiots out of harm's way."

"Normally guys would be kind of upset about getting called mom," I pointed out, but Arthur ignored me completely and instead addressed Demi.

"I want you resting, as well. I can't imagine you feel very well after what you went through."

"I'm fine," Demi argued, "I've been through worse."

"Don't make me get Kailas to force you down," Arthur threatened, and Demi's shoulders slumped as his lips twisted into something that I could've sworn was a pout.

"Don't use that against me."

"Okay how about this," I reached out to poke his cheek, "Kailas hasn't slept, like, at all since we got captured. You're supposed to be his bodyguard, right? That means it's your duty to keep him from overworking himself and getting so sleep deprived he passes out on the stairs. Force him down and say you're not gonna sleep unless he does," I wrapped my arm back around the pillow, "He'll feel a lot better with you next to him, maybe he'll even sleep, and eat. I haven't seen him eat since we got back. He's a fucking mess."

Demi was looking down, his hands folded on his lap, chewing on his bottom lip before grumbling, "If he doesn't sleep I'll tie him to the bed," he muttered, and I grinned in amusement.

"That's the spirit."

"Fine," Demi sighed, "I'll go sleep after I get you to your room."

"I can get there fine," I argued, and Arthur cleared his throat.

"Did I not just explain the whole no putting weight on your left leg thing?"

"I must have blocked it out."

"I'm not resting until I know you're in your room and not wandering around," Demi decided, and I groaned.

"You're both annoying!"

Arthur laughed and tapped my side, "You can sit up now. The most damage is in your hip and from all the cuts and burns."

"Can I put my pants on?" I asked, and Arthur handed me my jeans with a roll of his eyes.

"You'll have to change into sweats when you get to your room," he reminded, and I nodded as I pulled my shirt off so Arthur could get to the bandages.

I was silent as he cut away the dirty gauze so he could clean the stitching and the burns, my mind, for some reason, locked on Orion. Maybe because of how gentle he had been when he looked over all the injuries, carefully smoothing the medicinal salve over everything before wrapping the bandages like I was something worth taking care of.

And of course, with him in my head, I was now thinking of that "bet" he'd made with me just yesterday. I must have had a weird look on my face, because Demi elbowed me to get my attention and arched an eyebrow in question.

"What?"

"You look like you just heard a really bad joke," Demi said, and I snorted, looking away.

"Close enough I guess," I scratched at the bandages on my head, looking over at Arthur when he stood up, dumping a few dirty supplies into the trash bin, "Am I free?"

"For now," Arthur hummed, washing his hands before turning to me with two little pills and a cup of water, "Take these, then I want you to sleep, okay? If you start feeling sick just call for me. I'm going to assign someone to sit with you to make sure you don't try leaving, and to keep an eye on you in case you start feeling worse."

"Great, a babysitter," I mumbled, standing, and pulling my shirt on, putting my weight onto my right leg as Demi came up beside me.

"I'll help you walk, don't put any weight on your left leg."

"I got it," I reassured him, wrapping an arm around Demi's neck as he wound his own arm around my waist, helping me towards the door.

Kailas and Maggie were standing out in the hall when Demi helped me limp out, and I narrowed my eyes slightly when my sister turned, hands curled into fists at her sides and red rimming her eyes as she hesitated.

"How long have you been waiting out here?" I asked her, and she rubbed her arm.

"I asked if I could check on you, I was worried, and I... I overheard what you said in there," she rubbed her neck as my eyes widened and my face paled, "Dakota... I don't know if this will help, but Gracie, dad and I always knew you were gay," she offered me a crooked smile, "We were always okay with it, and we knew you and Ronnie were... you know, dating. We talked with Josie about it."

I scowled and turned my head away, "Great."

"We didn't know about Ronnie," she whispered, and I cringed, "I think... I mean, somehow, I think Josie knew, or he sensed something had happened, otherwise Ronnie would have shown up, but he always hated when we brought up the possibility that he was...," she paused, then smiled softly, "He kind of lost his mind," she admitted, "Josie I mean. Maybe if you'd kept going like you planned, if you found Josie, even if Ronnie was gone, Josie would have been able to keep going normally. We never even found his body, so it was really hard for him."

"You realize you're making me feel worse?" I bit, and Maggie winced, ruffling her hair.

"Right, sorry, wasn't thinking. What I mean is you shouldn't feel guilty about any of this. I don't know where Josie is right now, but I'm sure he's alive, and if that's the case he'll find us, and you'll be able to talk to him and give him some closure. Besides that, I want you to know that even if mom didn't accept you, Gracie, dad, and I always have. Not to mention the people here really seem to care about you. I think Ronnie would be happy."

I slowly turned my head away again, staring down and leaning heavily against Demi, "I don't know what you expect me to say to that," I admitted, "Thank you, I guess, but I don't need you to tell me I'm accepted despite my sexual preference. Honestly."

Maggie grinned at me, chuckling, "Good. That's what I wanted to hear. Although," she held a finger up, setting her other hand on her hip, "I am your older sister, which means it's my duty to scrutinize literally every date you ever have."

"Wow, great," I turned, "Better run, Kai, my sister is kind of scary."

Demi rolled his eyes, "Don't get him in trouble, please."

Maggie was glaring at Kailas now, looking incredibly suspicious, and I snickered at the frustration on his face as he rubbed his temples, "How are you feeling?" he asked me, dropping his arm, and I looked down at my left leg.

"I'm fine."

"He's forbidden from walking on his left leg for a while," Demi explained, "Wanna help get him into his room?"

"Yea," Kailas stepped closer, instead of helping Demi support me he scooped me into his arms, holding me carefully and looking over his shoulder towards Maggie, "You can tell your people house arrest is over. Sorry for keeping you confined like that, but we're still learning to trust you, and Dakota is an important member of this group."

"I've noticed," Maggie smiled, "Thank you for looking after him."

"Come on," Demi tugged on Kailas' arm to get him to move, following as he carried me down the hall and up the stairs towards my room.

"Stress fractures," Demi was saying as Kailas laid me on my bed, "He can't walk around or put any weight on his leg for the

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