Joel

The manor house was busier than I had ever seen it. Duncan had drafted in extra members of staff, and it seemed like they were everywhere.

We were preparing for Casper's 23rd birthday party which was being held here tonight.

"Where should I put these?" Mark asked me. Yes, Mark was one of the extra pairs of hands that had been brought in for tonight. I was grateful to have him around today.

Mark was holding some silver balloons. "Give them to Simon, over there." I pointed.

Simon was halfway up a ladder, cursing at the balloons that wouldn't pin into place on the pillar.

I chuckled to myself, and carried on preparing a huge bowl of punch. And yes, there was plenty of alcohol in it.

I hadn't seen Casper at all today. In fact, I'd barely seen him since the night Miss Hartley came to visit a couple of weeks ago. I shuddered a little at the memory. Luna had not left me alone all evening. I felt like she was a huge cat, and I was her toy mouse that she could bat around at will.

It had all been rather humiliating, and to make it worse, Casper hadn't really spoken to me since. I was guessing that Luna had successfully opened his eyes in reminding him that I was way beneath him, and not worth his attention.

I guess I would find out tonight. I wasn't sure how, but I was determined that tonight I would somehow have a conversation with him, and hopefully figure out if things had changed.

The guests started arriving at 8pm. Duncan told me that Casper had chosen the guests himself, so there were no new females for him to shake hands with tonight.

There were about 100 guests in total, so it wasn't as many as the ball, but the fact that it was more informal, and there was lots of alcohol, meant that the guests would prove to me much more hard work.

Wolves and alcohol didn't really mix well, hence the extra staff.

I was in charge of the punch, and I had been given strict instructions to lessen the amount of alcohol I put in it as the night wore on.

I was stood at my table in the corner of the ballroom, which was now set up more like a club, with loud booming music and multi coloured spotlights in an otherwise dark room.

The noise and lights were starting to give me a headache.

It was about 2 hours into the party when I finally saw him. He was on the dancefloor, his arms round the shoulders of Jamie and another male and they were jumping up and down to the beat of the song.

I'd never seen this side to him before and I found myself unable to take my eyes off him. I was sure it was alcohol that was loosening him up so much, but still, his face was beaming with happiness and it made my stomach do a sort of flip.

He was wearing black jeans and a white short sleeved fitted shirt. He looked amazing. I just wanted to touch him all over, then rip those clothes right off him and....

"There you are!"

I jumped slightly at the sudden exclamation that came from someone right next to me.

"Oh flip, you scared the crap out of me," I said holding my hand to my chest.

Emily giggled.

"Would you like some punch?" I asked while spooning some into a cup for her.

She took it off me with a slight curtsey of thanks then said, "I wasn't really after punch, but never mind. I came to see how you were doing."

"I'm great." I said and put on my best fake smile.

Emily laughed. "I guess I'd be fed up if I was having to serve punch all evening."

I just shrugged. At least I was getting paid for it.

"Have you seen Casper?" she asked.

I nodded and pointed to the dance floor where he was currently trying to do some sort of irish jig.

"I think he's had rather a lot to drink," I said.

"No kidding!" Emily said while surveying the spectacle in front of her.

"He doesn't usually drink" I said, for some reason feeling the need to defend him. "I think maybe turning 23 has hit him quite hard."

"I know that feeling," she said turning back to me.

An arm suddenly looped through Emily's and Luna appeared at her side. "Come on, I've got to show you what food they've just brought out.." she said dragging Emily away without giving me a second glance.

I sighed, annoyed at myself for caring what these people thought.

I glanced round the room and stopped when I saw a pair of dark eyes staring right at me. The eyes belonged to Casper's dad, the Alpha.

I quickly dropped my gaze and busied myself with topping up the punch.

Another hour later and I swear I could have fallen asleep standing up. These sort of events were exhausting! I'd been serving drinks, clearing up spillages, restocking the food, finding lost property, finding lost guests, escorting countless people around the manor, and even helping carry passed out drunk people to their rides home.

I was almost starting to resent Casper for even having a birthday.

I was standing in the kitchen, just grabbing myself a quick glass of water, when an equally tired looking Duncan came up to me.

"How are you holding up?" He asked me.

"I'm tired, but I'll live," I replied, "How about you?"

"I'm getting too old for this!" he said, but smiled anyway.

A barrel load of expletives came from one of the chefs as a pile of rubbish that had been balanced precariously on top of the already full bin, went crashing onto the floor.

Duncan smiled at me sheepishly, "Could you do me a favour and empty the bins for me? I've just let the kitchen porter have a quick break."

I rolled my eyes, but got up to empty the bins. I hated emptying the bins. I mean, I suppose everyone hates emptying the bins, but I particularly hated it here because the large outdoor bins were halfway around the house. And it was cold out. And dark.

I grabbed as much of the rubbish as I could carry, then headed to the back door. I went to grab my jacket but noticed that it wasn't there.

"Damn it!" I cursed before heading outside anyway. I was sure that if I hurried, I wouldn't get too cold.

I was right as I was practically panting my the time I reached the bins. I opened them up and swung the rubbish into them as quickly as I could. It was dark and creepy out here and I wanted to get back as soon as possible.

I hadn't walked more than a few yards from the bin when a loud cough made me squeal out in fright. I blinked in the dim light, making out the silhouette of someone sat on a low wall on the edge of the garden. The said someone, was now doubled up in laughter, no doubt at my lovely impression I just gave of a 4 year old girl.

I edged closer, sure that I recognised that laugh.

"Casper?"

"That's me," he said, suddenly no longer laughing.

"What are you doing out here?" I asked.

"Shhhh! I'm having a sneaky fag." He then chuckled lightly, like a child who knew they were doing something wrong.

This was new to me. Drunk and smoking?

I went over to him and sat myself on the wall next to him.

"You do realise that's my coat don't you?" I said.

Now I was close to him, I could see most of his face from the glow of the few garden solar lamps that were dotted around the garden.

Casper frowned and looked at my coat around his shoulders. I smiled at his confused expression, like he couldn't remember how it got there.

"Oh," he said, standing up. "Here, you can have it back."

He began to unfasten it, but I quickly grabbed hold of his arm and pulled him back gently.

He stumbled slightly and plonked back on the wall.

"It's ok," I said, I don't need it now.

He turned and looked at me, a blank expression on his face. His eyes moved from my face to my hand that was still attached to his arm.

I snapped it back quickly and looked away from him. I could feel a slight blush on my cheeks, and was grateful that it would be too dark for him to see.

By the time I looked back at Casper, he was staring straight ahead and taking another drag on his cigarette.

"I didn't know you smoked," I said, just for something to say.

"I don't," he replied, offering the cigarette to me.

I took it from him carefully, making sure not to burn my fingers.

"So how's being 23 treating you?" I asked.

"A party, plenty of alcohol, and a wife as a birthday present. What more could a guy want?" he said, then promptly burst out laughing.

I just stared at him. I was pretty sure what he said wasn't meant to be funny.

Once he calmed down I said, "I'm guessing the wife is Emily?"

He didn't say anything for a while, just stared ahead into the darkness, and I began to think he hadn't heard me when he whispered a quiet "yes".

There was a light breeze where we were sat, and I watched as the cigarette glowed orange everytime the wind caught it. It was quite mesmerising.

"Are you going to have a smoke or not?" he asked, gesturing for me to give it back.

"Oh no," I said, "I don't smoke," and then I stubbed it out on the wall.

He stared at me, with his mouth hanging open.

"What? Why take it then?"

I just shrugged at him.

"You could have given it back," He said grumpily. He reminded me of a child who had had their sweets taken off them.

"I don't get it," he said, "why are you always disis...disres.....dispecting........annoying me?"

I looked over at him biting my bottom lip to stop me from laughing.

"I don't think of it as disrespecting you." I said.

"You just took my.....your Alpha's fag off him. How is that not dis...res...pect....ful?"

"Surely my job is to protect my Alpha at all costs, so I was just protecting you from poisoning your lungs with that cancer stick. Sorry if you see that as being disrespectful."

I held his gaze and watched as the frown on his face turned into a small smile.

He looked down at his lap, then said, "That's sweet of you. Thank you," while nudging my shoulder with his.

The night air might have been chilly, but I felt the warmth spread from my shoulder down through my body.

I heard an owl hooting in the distance. I say hooting, but it was more of a "twit" sort of screech.

"What's that?" Casper said, sitting up straight and looking around like a meerkat.

"It's a male Tawny Owl" I replied. "You know how as children we are always taught that owls go 'twit-twoo'? Well technically that's not true. The twit-twoo is made by two owls. The male calls out to the female with the 'twit' and she responds with the 'twoo'. So what you just heard there is a male Tawny Owl looking for it's mate."

Casper laughed but without humour. "Well, I hope he does better than me."

I bit my lip, cursing myself for saying such a thing without thinking it through.

"If it's any consolation, I don't want to find my mate." I said.

His head snapped round to face me. I carried on looking straight ahead.

"Who doesn't want to find their mate?" he asked, clearly shocked by my words.

I realised that in order to distract him, I had sort of backed myself into a corner.

"Me I guess," I said, answering his question literally.

"Yes, but why?" he said.

"Does it matter?" I replied.

"Oh no no no!" he said shaking his head. "Don't start that game. I'm going to keep asking you until you answer the question. Why don't you want to find your mate?"

I sighed, realising there was no point in trying to evade the question.

"Well for a start, it's unlikely that I would find them. It's not like there's much opportunity for people like me to meet potential mates."

Casper looked thoughtful. "I get that I suppose, but that doesn't mean you wouldn't want to find them."

"Yes, but if I don't find them, then I get to go and look for them, and that's the bit I'm looking forward to."

"Ok, so let me get this straight, you hope you don't find your mate, so that you can go and look for your mate?"

I laughed at the confusion on his face. "I guess when you put it like that, it does sound a bit stupid."

"So I'm guessing that you want to travel then?" he said.

"Yeah I do," I replied.

"Well I hope you don't find your mate in the first week of traveling," he said chuckling slightly.

"Oh, trust me, I won't." I said.

Casper frowned at me.

I looked down at my hands, and noticed I was flicking my nails - a nervous habit I had, so I sat on my hands to stop me from doing it.

I could see Casper trying to figure something out, but then his face cleared and he seemed to give up.

The silence stretched out between us. It wasn't uncomfortable though. We were just both of us lost in our own thoughts.

Casper shifted a little and his thigh grazed mine. I felt a tingle run up my leg from his touch.

I noticed him looking down at our legs and I wondered whether he felt it too.

"I can't feel my legs."

Or maybe not.

"What do you mean?" I said chuckling at him now hitting his legs.

"I think I've sat here too long," he said now standing and shaking his legs out.

The action left him off balance and I stood up and grabbed his arms again to stop him from falling.

"Be careful, the ground is uneven here," I said.

He steadied himself then looked at my face. His eyes met mine. In this light, they were like two inky black wells, drawing me in.

Other than my hands on his arms, our bodies weren't touching but it was like I could feel him pressed against me all the way down one side of my body.

He was looking at me intently, but I couldn't quite make out his expression.

I took my chance and slowly let go of one of his arms and moved my hand up to the zip on my coat.

His eyes followed my hand, but he said nothing.

I slowly pulled the zip down, to just below his chest.

I took a breath, then slid my hand gently through the opening of the coat on the left hand side, my hand grazing his chest lightly.

I heard him take a slight intake of breath. I paused, but I made sure to hold his arm firmly with my other hand so he wouldn't topple over if he made any sudden movement.

Noting that he was still stationary, I continued to push my hand in further, twisting it to get a better angle.

Finally I felt my hand grip what I was looking for, and I withdrew quickly.

The movement made Casper take a step back, but I gripped him firmly with both hands, or at least one hand, and a couple of fingers.

"Wh-what was that?" he said, looking rather dazed.

"Sorry, I got you a present and it was in the inside pocket of my coat."

"Your coat?" he said looking down. Once again he seemed surprised to see it on his back. He grabbed hold of the collar and sniffed it, as if confirming it was mine.

"Anyway, happy birthday," I said holding out the small box.

Casper's eyebrows shot up as he caught sight of the box.

"Oh no, don't worry!" I said laughing, "I'm not about to ask you to marry me, I just needed something to put it in, and my mum has a load of these lying around."

Casper held out his hand, and I put the little ring box in his palm.

He opened it silently, then smiled, cocking his head a little to one side.

"What's this?" he asked, pulling it out of the box.

"It's a pin badge of the animal I think matches you best," I said.

"A tiger?"

"Yes, a tiger," I replied.

"Are you going to tell me why?" he asked while turning the badge over in his hand.

I thought about it for a second. Maybe I could tell him some of it, afterall at least it was too dark to see me blush.

"Well, I thought that a tiger..."

"JOEL? JOEL?"

I swung round to look in the direction of my name and saw a black figure making its way towards me.

"I'M OVER HERE," I shouted back.

I briefly looked back at Casper and he was staring at me with wide eyes. Before I could even begin to think why, my uncle said, "Joel, what are you still doing out.......oh, sorry Sir, I didn't see you there."

Casper looked over to my uncle, but didn't say anything. I saw my uncle staring intently at my hands, which were still clutching onto Casper's arms.

"Oh, this isn't what it looks like," I said to my uncle, once again thankful for the darkness. "The ground is uneven here and Casper is a little unsteady on his feet, aren't you?"

Casper looked at me a little blankly, much to my annoyance, then said, "I'm fine," before taking a step backwards while pushing me away.

"I need to get back inside," he said, then strode off past me and Duncan without another word.

Duncan turned back and glared at me. "What was that about?" he said.

I was saved from answering by an "oooff" noise, and a Casper sprawled out on the grass in the distance.

"I told you!" I said, running over to him.

"Here," I said to Casper offering my hand.

He glared at it, then stood up on his own. "I'm fine! Now go and do your job," he said, before walking back into the house.

What was up with him?

I was about to head back when I noticed something glinting in the grass. I bent over and picked up the tiger pin. I quickly slipped it into my trouser pocket before turning back to my uncle.

"Come on," he said, "it's winding down now so we need to start clearing up."

The next hour was spent cleaning up other people's mess. By the time it was looking almost like it was before the party, I was dead on my feet.

I was about to leave when I suddenly realised that Casper had disappeared with my coat. I searched all round the staff areas but couldn't see it anywhere, so I headed back upstairs to the main section of the house. I was just debating whether I should go and knock on Casper's door when Simon appeared looking flustered.

"Hey Joel," he said, "can you do me a favour?"

"What?" I asked, trying to sound polite and not pissed off that I might have to do something else after such a long night.

"Casper's passed out on the sofa in the lounge. Could you go and try and wake him up while I go and get someone to help him up to his room?"

"Was my coat there?" I asked hopefully.

"What?" he said over his shoulder as he walked off to get help.

"Never mind." I said. At this rate I would never get home.

I walked into the lounge and nearly laughed at the sight in front of me.

Casper was sprawled out on his back on the sofa, like a starfish, with one leg and one arm dangling off the side.

His mouth was wide open and he was snoring lightly.

I wandered over to him, and enjoyed the luxury of being able to stare at his beautiful face without him knowing.

He was so perfect it was sickening. Even lying there, with drool coming out of his mouth, he was still the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Shame he was an alpha, and an arsehole. Sometimes.

I crouched down so my face was level with his.

"Casper!" I whispered loudly. "Casper!"

There was no movement.

"Casper!" I tried again, a little louder this time, and I gently shook his shoulder.

Still nothing. He was really out for the count.

I looked at his hand which was outstretched, hanging off the sofa.

I could touch it. No one would know.

My hand itched to grab hold of it, and lace his fingers with mine.

I looked at the door, and listened for movement. The house was fairly quiet now, and I felt confident that I would be able to