a/n: I apologize that this took so long to come out. I've been surprisingly busy lately and then just had no idea what to do for this chapter. I finally came up with this so I hope you enjoy it. A quick note on the story: Henry is not and will never be a villain character, I'm not even planning for him to catch feelings. You are allowed to love him. He's genuinely just a sweet and supportive fuck buddy and that is all he will ever be to Kayden and they're both okay with that. I just wanted to mention that for anyone who's worried about their relationship progressing to something more and Elias being forgotten or there being a love triangle. I hate love triangles, the only reason I did it in the last book was to demonstrate a point about Logan's personality. There will not be one in this book. Also, I've been obsessed with this song lately.

A few weeks later, not much had changed. It was a quiet Thursday at the start of February, the ground in all of Rosewater was covered in a thin layer of snow, and it was never more than a few degrees above freezing outside. Kayden and Henry had settled into a schedule of meeting two or three times a week. Some nights, it was just nice to have the company, and once, they didn't even do anything particularly exciting, just sat and drank together, conversing like old friends over a bowl of fruit and a movie. He found out how much of a cinema buff Henry was, he liked explaining different aspects of the filming, the behind-the-scenes, and the meaning. Kayden liked not having to worry about their relationship not being anything more than it was, a comfortable companionship where they both got what they wanted and agreed on the terms equally. 

February meant Valentine's day was over the horizon. Not that that meant so much to Kayden because he'd never really had a boyfriend to celebrate with. Occasionally, it was an excuse for a party, but other than that, he didn't bother too much with it. He assumed it also didn't hold much weight at Antisto. There were no girls, and it was about the furthest thing from a progressive school, so there wasn't much room for a holiday dedicated to celebrating love. 

"It's not a day dedicated to celebrating love, it's a day dedicated to exploiting couples into buying excessive amounts of chocolate and shaming those who would prefer to be single," Elias said when Kayden brought it up during one of their study sessions. 

"Kinda sounds like you're just single and feel ashamed of it," Kayden said with a little grin.

"I'm not ashamed of it, I don't have time for a partner." Kayden didn't mention that he wondered why Elias would choose that term over something like 'girlfriend'. It just seemed a little gay was all. Then again, maybe he was reading into it too much and Elias just liked to use the proper terms for things.

"Also, what's with you not liking holidays? First Christmas, then Valentine's day? Keep going like this and you'll end up like Ebeneezer Scrooge."

"Old, rich, and alone?"

"Precisely."

"I think I'd prefer it to the alternative," Elias said, looking over the textbook.

"Which is?"

"Old, poor, and deliriously in love." 

"I think I'd prefer that," Kayden said with a shrug.

"To each their own."

"Well, whether you've got time for it or not, is there at least someone you're interested in? I mean, come on, most of the guys at school are talking about some St. Williams girl they like or someone from home. Haven't you got someone like that?" 

"Have you?" Elias asked, glancing at Kayden who paused, scratching the back of his head. 

"Not exactly." 

"There's your answer." 

"But, come on, you could get any girl you want, I mean-"

"Kayden, we're supposed to be studying for the History test."

"There must be someone."

"There's a girl my parents want me to court and that's it. There's no one else. I told you, I'm not interested in dating, and marriage is...well, it's entirely transactional. There is no room in my life for frilly things like love." 

"Who said anything about marriage?" Kayden asked with a grin and Elias gave him a look that told him to drop it. "Wait...you're not, like, arranged, right?" 

"No...not yet anyway," Elias said softly, pulling his fingers through his hair. 

"What do you mean not yet? Your parents wouldn't pull something like that, would they?"

"I don't see how that's any of your business," Elias said, looking at him sternly and Kayden realized he had gotten a little too close to crossing a line. 

"Sorry, I know, but...you know you can talk to me if you need to, right?" Kayden said. "I mean, we're friends." 

"I don't need to talk, but thank you for the offer," Elias said, giving him a small smile. "What I need is for you to focus on the study guide. This test is Monday." 

Kayden rolled his eyes with a smile. "Yeah yeah, alright. Let's get this shit over with then." 

---

A few hours later, Kayden was back at Henry's house, buttoning his shirt up and stuffing his tie in his pocket. 

"Can I interest you in a cup of tea?" Henry asked, popping his head back in the room, his hair messed up and his shirt off, it was still laying somewhere on the floor. "It's hardly late." 

Kayden checked the time on his phone and smiled a little. "Okay, but just for a minute."

"I know, I know." Henry laughed quietly, walking back down to the kitchen where Kayden joined him. "Okay, would you like Chamomile, Earl Gray, or Green Tea? Are you planning on studying tonight?" 

"Nah, I'll take Chamomile, I'm not trying to stay up."

"Gotcha," Henry said, dropping a tea bag into a ceramic mug before he handed it to the redhead. "Oh also, you're not sore or anything, right? I've got Advil in the cabinet if you need it." 

"I'm good, I've dealt with worse." 

"Are you saying my size is average?" Henry asked with a grin.

"No, just that some guys don't use enough lube."

"Ouch."

"Yeah." 

They both laughed quietly and sat down at the kitchen table together. The mug warmed Kayden's hands and he looked around a moment. 

"Do you ever get lonely here?" Kayden asked softly.

"All the time. That's why I try to keep it filled, the parties keep the quiet out, but every party has to end eventually, right? And then I'm still just here," Henry said, forcing a smile onto his face for a moment. "I don't think I ever quite get used to it, y'know?" 

"Yeah, I know," Kayden said, gently moving his thumb over the handle of the mug, staring into the water. "I hate being alone, I can't stand it. I...I can't stand myself sometimes." 

"Is that why you're doing this?" Henry asked. "Running from yourself?"

"Maybe," Kayden said, drawing a soft breath in. "There's also just...I mean, there's this guy, and I don't think he'll ever be into me, so I'm trying to give up on it, but I can't and I don't know what to do."

Henry smiled, resting his cheek in his hand, "How do you know he's not into you?"

"Well, there have been a few different things. Like, there was this one time, last New Year's, when I was drunk and stupid and I told him I missed him but then he just acted like it didn't happen. And also I've tried to hint at liking him, and I've tried to get closer to him, but it's like he just shuts it out. I hit a wall and I can't go any further." 

"hmm, I dunno, kinda sounds like a closet case."

"He could be, but I doubt it. He's...I don't even know, even if he was into guys, he's one of those people that wouldn't accept it until his fifties when he's married with kids, and then he'd just prefer to live a miserable life instead of ruining what he's got. He's always got everything under control, it's...there's no room for any diversion from the plan," Kayden said, taking a sip of his tea. "Have you got cookies by chance?" 

Henry got up, thinking. "I think we have gingersnaps."

"Oh, I love gingersnaps."

"Right? And they go so well with tea." 

"Yeah, get me a sleeve of those bad boys," Kayden said with a laugh and Henry chuckled, bringing over the container. 

Henry sat back down with him, sipping his tea. "Well, it seems like you really like this guy, so I hope it works out, but I know what you mean. I was head over heels for this one kid at Antisto a couple of years ago. I mean, he was everything to me, and he was so perfect. Like, head of the equestrian team, cute as hell, a little bit of a troublemaker, and he came to my parties on the weekends. One night, we actually ended up hooking up. After that, we fucked a few more times, but I realized he was into someone else, and...I'd never be what he wanted. The good news is, I'm almost over it now. What I'm saying is, you won't be hung up over him forever. Memories fade and you eventually move on. If it works out, great, but if it doesn't, life continues and you go on with it. Just keep your head high and take care of yourself." 

Kayden smiled. "Thanks, Henry."

"No problem," He chuckled.

Kayden glanced at the clock on the wall. "Shit, I should get back. Have you got Thursday next week open?"

"Yeah, I should. I'll check my schedule and text you." 

"Sounds good," Kayden said, fixing his hair in the hall mirror before he rushed out the door and rushed down the streets on his skateboard as snow fell lightly around him.

When he got back to the dorms, Elias was sitting there on the steps, smoking a cigarette. Kayden smiled, picking up his board as he walked over to him, sitting down.

Elias glanced over at him, "You don't smell like alcohol." 

"Good observation," Kayden said as he picked the cigarette from Elias' fingers, taking a drag of it.

"And yet your shirt is a button uneven." 

Kayden choked on his smoke when he heard that, trying to keep his coughing down. "And?"

"There was no and," Elias said with a small smile, taking the cigarette back. 

"I feel like there was."

"If you'd like to say something, you can, but I wasn't asking for an explanation."

"I'm sure you assumed one."

"I assure you, I make no assumptions...well, no undue ones anyway." 

"Asshole," Kayden snickered, shaking his head as he took the cigarette again.

"That feels like an undue assumption if I've ever heard one," Elias chuckled. 

"It was thoroughly researched." 

"I'm sure it was." 

Kayden looked out at the darkened campus, the snow picking up. "Are we scheduled for a blizzard tonight?" He asked. 

"Yeah, the weather channel said something like a foot of snow, maybe more though, it was unclear."

"Does Antisto get snow days?"

"If the professors can't get to school."

"Sweet," Kayden said with a small smile. 

"Don't hold your breath, it's a rare occurrence. They've got a hell of a lot of determination."

"I'll keep my hopes high and expectations low, then."