Chapter 12

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It's Monday morning and the only thing that has gotten me out of bed this morning was coffee.

I guess coffee is another of drug of mine sometimes.

Im currently standing at my locker at school holding a large cup of to go coffee, that I have purchased form a local cafe, I see Ryver walking over to me, with a small smile on his face. 

I completely forgot about the occurrence that had happened on Saturday, but the sight of Ryver has quickly brought back everything.

"Hey Ensleey." Ryver says, leaning against the locker next to mine, with a look of unease on his face.

A billion thoughts are swarming through my brain as usual. Should I ignore him? Or not?

If I were to be completely honest with myself I don't want to, but I also don't think it's a good idea, because why would someone who's popular talk to me? 

He could be plotting to embarrass me in front of the whole school, for all I know.

Maybe if I try to get him to hate me he would give up, and leave me alone.

I don't think it's the bets idea but here goes nothing.

"Hi." I say trying to walk away.

"What class do you have now?"  He asks.

"None of your business."  I say, walking faster in the direction of my class, I feeling childish but don't care because talking to someone who happens to holds a form of popularity has never ended well with me. He quickly catches up to me, with his long strides.

Damn him and his long legs!

"Okay." He says calmly, not getting the gist of the situation.

After a few moments I begin to get annoyed with him following me. I turn around and nearly collide into his chest. He's so freaking tall.

"Why are you following me!" I say with a hint of anger in my voice.

"None of your business." He shrugs carelessly.

What game is this boy playing at?

I huff. "Really?"

"Yep." He says, with no emotion in his voice, I stare with the most intense gaze I can he stares right back.

We both don't break eye contact.

One thing I can tell from this occurrence is that his green eyes are very pretty.

Get a grip Ensleey!

I roll my eyes when I realize this could go on all day, so I look away and  walk away faster this time.

"Ah c'mon that was fun! We should do it again." 

I don't say anything.

It's for the best I tell myself.


~*~*~*~*~

Ryver hasn't attempted to talk to me since the day in the hallway, nor does he stare at me.

This is what I wanted I remind myself. It's not easy, but I've learned to expect it. 

Im sitting at my usual lunch table, when I hear the same annoying sound of heels.

Why does she find it amusing to annoy the shit out of me?

"I guess Ryver finally saw how worthless you are." Melinda laughs, as if it's the funniest thing in the world.

"Oh look poor Ensleey is heartbroken." She continues on. 

Why gave her that idea, she really thinks I care what she says? I honestly don't. So why should I give her the satisfaction of getting a reaction?

She kept going on and on about how pathetic I am. I didn't care.

"Let me guess he just wanted sex?" She chuckles and so do her minions. "You know he only ever will want me. Right?" 

No, he doesn't want but it's fine keep thinking that. I wanted to say.

"Your kinda of slut playing with him like that. You know?" Melinda continues. "Or maybe you did sleep with him, but he saw that you were nothing. You're such a slut!" 

"Fucking slut. That's all you will ever be someones toy!"

"That bothers you, huh?" She laughs with bitterness. "Because you are one, it wouldn't bother you 9f you weren't, to bad that you are a slut."

I get up quickly trying to get the memory out of my mind, why I can't move on form it?

"Did I hurt your feelings." All her stupid friends began to laugh.

I felt dizzy, I could barley focus on the words that Melinda had spat out.

Trying not to let her words trigger the unwanted guest that is my memories.

I ran out of the cafeteria, I don't need to have a panic attack in front everyone. Everything began to blur in front of me. I didn't want to go to the bathroom Who knows who I would bump into there. 

So I opted for the library no one goes there.

I ran not bothering to look at the librarian as I made my run to the spot I always go to.

It's the non-fiction section, with science books and other boring things. 

I sat in the corner I normally sit in and tried my best to relax. Leaning my head back against the shelves of books.

It's just a memory I reminded myself over and over.

It's not my reality anymore.

Breath in and out. I kept repeating on repeat for few minutes.

Nope not helping.

"Ensleey?" I heard a familiar voice. I couldn't tell who the source of the voice was, due to my vision being blocked by my waterfall of tears.

"Hey are you okay?" The person spoke again.

Ryver. Why was he here?

"Ryver?" I say my voice barely above a whisper.

"It's me." His voice is gentle and soothing. "You're okay."

He attempted to touch me, but I moved away quickly when I felt his finger brush against my arm.

"Please don't fucking touch me." I couldn't control what I'm saying, I felt like nothing was steady.

Like my words was shaking and falling apart, I hate this.

Luckily to he doesn't try to touch me again, which Im grateful for.

About five minutes later everything started to feel like normal again, expect for the pounding in my head.

I looked over and saw Ryver intense gaze on me, I can tell he's worried.

"Are you okay?" He repeated what he had said earlier as a question this time.

"Yes, you didn't have to stay." My voice came out scratchy.

"I wanted to."

I nodded not having enough energy to push it further. "Why are in the library anyways?"

"Need a book for biology." He says fixing his gaze ahead to the many rows of shelves.

"Oh." I say not knowing how to reply.

My phone starts to ring, I look down to see Collin's name. I could see Ryver staring at the phone in between us.

He clenches his jaw, as I pick it up decline the call. I'll call him later, he would most certainly begin to worry if he notices that I was crying. 

"Your not going to answer it?"

"No." I say looking over at him.

"I should go." He says standing up. "Call me if you need anything."

Those were the last words he said before I watched him leave the library. 

Didn't he say he needs a book for biology?

~~~~~~~~

A u t h o r s   N o t e

Thanks so much for reading and for 150 reads means a lot.

Please vote and comment if you enjoyed.

R.E




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