2 - "I know how I used to be."

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"So you actually received an invitation? Like, in the mail? He sent an invitation in the mail? Like, an actual piece of paper that said you had been invited to—"

"Yes, Vi. An actual invitation, handwritten, using an actual pen and an actual stamp that was sent to an actual post office to be actually sent to me," I say, shoving my best friend playfully.

Violet Marks. Best friend since moving to town five years ago. She was the pretty blonde-haired girl with brown eyes, long legs and tanned skin. The one I actually hated for the first few months after moving schools because she always seemed stuck-up from a distance. Eventually, we were partnered up in chemistry, a subject we both despised. I realised she was actually a decent human being and boom, we were friends. The rest is history.

She's sipping her milkshake, grinning wildly. It's the sort of grin that scares me. She only uses it when she's thinking of something bad.

"Lottie is right, as per usual. You have to go, Lu. It'd be crazy not to at least drop by."

"Like I have a choice," I huff, swirling my own straw around my vanilla milkshake. I rest my face in my hand, frowning down at the table. "He hates me, though."

"Well, clearly he doesn't. You don't get an invite in the mail if someone hates you."

"I guess," I sigh, still not excited about the fact I'm going to see Easton again.

Let's face it, when you're five years old and you make a pact to always be friends with someone, you don't see a possible reality where your parents die in a fire and your best friend loses his dad too. No one becomes friends thinking that they won't be one day, but that is exactly what happened to Easton and I.

"You know what?" Violet says, grasping my hand over the table. "Seeing as we are here, buying food, we might as well use our resources and find you a completely new outfit to rock the socks off of Easton Carter."

"I don't think that's necessary," I deadpan.

"Whatever!" she says, grabbing her bag and walking off towards the nearest store. "You need to lighten up! You got invited to a party, not a funeral!"

Even though her comment doesn't faze me, she covers her mouth like she's sworn in front of the pope. "I shouldn't have said that."

I frown at her, confused. "What? The word funeral? Vi, it's okay. I do have a sense of humour, you know."

She shrugs, "I know, it's just—"

"I know," I mutter, keeping pace with her. "I know how I used to be."

There was a time when I didn't think about anything except the fire. A time when I would lie in bed, eating nothing for days while Lottie screamed and cried for me to just get up. I knew that I had been hard on her and the day that I finally snapped out of it was the day I saw how broken and defeated she looked. I never wanted to see her like that again, so I pushed through the pain as much as I could, knowing I couldn't keep living the way I was.

"You know I haven't reacted to words like that for years."

She smiles, squeezing my arm gently. "I know, but I still worry about you. I don't want you to ever go back to how you were. Especially with all the progress you've made. Sometimes I worry that something might trigger it."

"You don't have to censor yourself around me. I know you. I know how you act. If you stopped acting like yourself around me, I'd feel like you were pulling away."

"You know that will never happen," she grins.

I shake my head. "How did this conversation get so dark so quickly, anyway? I thought you were taking me shopping."

"Yes." She grabs my arm, pulling me along to catch up. "Let's find you a smokin' hot outfit so that when you walk through that door, Easton won't know why he stopped being your best friend in the first place."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It has been hours. Literally, hours of looking through racks of clothes I don't even like.

Violet's got a pile of clothes slung over her arm as she goes around scrutinizing every last detail.

"I think you've definitely got to go for something pretty damn short. But not too short that your ass hangs out when you bend over, you feel me?"

"God, please stop talking. I am not wearing something that short," I say, pointing to the black dress she's holding up that I initially thought was a singlet top.

"Well, I'm not letting you wear your tracksuit pants. And don't even think about those stupid fluffy sheep pants you have."

"I'm walking away now," I say, despite Violet's protests.

"What about this?" Violet says, as I spin around to face her. She's holding up a vibrant red bodycon latex dress.

"Do I even need to say it?" I roll my eyes, turning back to flick through some more dresses.

"What about this then?" she says, and I barely glance up to see that she is now holding a snake-skinned co-ord.

"Vi–"

"Ok fine. I'll be serious now, I swear."

"Vi–"

"Lu, just look at what I'm holding up already."

"No."

"Lu."

"No, I'm not looking again. I'm too scared to see what monstrosity you've picked up now."

"Luna no-middle-name Lloyd. Will you stop being stubborn and just look?"

When I finally give in with a sigh, I'm pleasantly surprised to see that she is finally holding up a dress for me and not for her. It's white and it instantly reminds me of the springtime.

"I love it," I smile.

"Me too," she says, walking over to the register.

"I haven't even tried it on yet," I laugh.

"No need," she grins, "I already know you'll look hot."

I roll my eyes, "Violet, seriously, I don't want to waste my money if–"

We both freeze when we notice who is working at the desk.

Marvin. Or better known to us as mooning Marvin, the boy who showed his school, including Violet who was standing towards the front of the crowd when it happened, his entire rear end in second grade. Although I did not get the delight of seeing such a sight, Vi has told me enough of the story to make me feel like I was there that day. Not to mention, mooning Marvin has been crushing on Violet since, well, forever.

"Ok, change of plans. I'm going to meet you out the front of this store while you pay, alright?" she says, handing me the dress and starting to walk off. But she's too late, Marvin is already calling her name.

I stifle a laugh, walking to the counter. "Hey there, moo– Marvin...I, uh, didn't know that you worked here."

He nods, flicking his hair back from his eyes before scanning my dress. "Yeah, been here for a couple of weeks."

Violet's by my side now and when Marvin notices, he perks up, his smile growing. "Hey, Violet."

"Hi," she says. Violet may not feel the same way, but she is nothing but nice to Marvin. In fact, I don't think Violet really has a mean bone in her body.

"So, what made you want to work in a women's department store?" Violet asks.

Marvin rubs his neck as I hand him the money for my new dress.

He shrugs. "Not sure, I just saw the job advertisement and I needed the money. A job is a job, right?"

"Right," I say. I'm not stupid. We see Marvin all the time in this shopping centre. I'm sure he is quite aware that this is Violet's all-time favourite store.

He puts my dress in a bag, never taking his eyes off Violet. "Are you guys excited to start university?"

"Yeah, I guess so," Violet says. "I mean, I'm more nervous than anything."

"Oh, yeah. Totally," Marvin grins. Half the time I'm convinced he doesn't even hear what Violet is saying because he's too busy staring at her.

"Anyway," Violet says, clearing her throat and turning to me, "we should get going. It's getting...late."

"Yeah. Late," Marvin murmurs.

"I'll see you around though, right?" Violet says and I sigh. When she feels bad, she always starts backtracking. I know her like the back of my hand and she always feels guilty, thinking that she's said something that might hurt someone.

"I'll probably see you around this summer. I see that you hang out here all the time. I mean, not that I look out for you all the time. I just mean that sometimes I see you a lot. I mean, I don't look for you a lot, I just–"

"I'll see you around, Marvin," Violet says, blushing.

He waves awkwardly at us before we turn around and walk towards the exit.

"I feel tragically sorry for that poor boy," I mumble.

She sighs. "The thing is, I know he's liked me for a long time, but he's never actually asked me out."

"It's because he's shy, Vi."

"Yeah, I know..."

"Wait," I say, grabbing her arm to stop her walking. I accidentally bump shoulders with a little girl and she glares at me. I mumble an apology before I move Violet out of the way of more angry shoppers.

"Why does it matter if he hasn't ever asked you out? Unless...oh my god, no way! You like mooning Marvin?"

"What? No!" Violet huffs, dragging me towards the exit. "I just thought that he would have asked me out by now, that's all."

I squint, eyeing her suspiciously. "But if he did ask you out, wouldn't that just be worse? Because then you'd have to reject him and we all know that is not a word in your vocabulary. You wouldn't even want to hurt a mosquito if it was sucking your blood."

"I mean, yeah, I guess..."

"Seriously, Violet, do you like mooning Ma–"

"Stop calling him that. It happened years ago. Imagine if I kept calling you something that happened when you were eight."

"Except you didn't know me when I was eight."

"That is beside the point."

"Is it, though?" I giggle, shoving her shoulder. "There isn't anything wrong if you do like him. You know that right? Marvin is a respectable guy, and it's obvious he really likes you."

"I know that. But I don't like him."

I grin. "Whatever you say."

"It's true!" she says, throwing up her hands. "This day wasn't even supposed to be about me, Lu. We were supposed to be talking about Easton Carter, the notorious best friend who broke your little heart."

"He didn't break my heart," I huff, looking away.

"Why do you always deny it? I know he did."

"We weren't, like, romantically involved."

"Just because you weren't romantically involved, doesn't mean he didn't break your heart. You were friends from the day you were born. It wouldn't make sense if you were okay about it."

"It's been years, though," I say, gulping.

I'm dodging her statement because I hate it when she's right all the time. I'd always found it quite hard to let go of the good memories I'd shared with Easton.

"I've never believed that time heals all wounds. Sometimes, there are certain wounds that just can't be fixed," Violet whispers, squeezing my arm.

She gives me a hug goodbye before walking off in the opposite direction. "Call me on Sunday morning!" she shouts, "I want all the details about the party!"

I wave, before heading off home with a mind that won't stop thinking about the last time I saw Easton. I'd cried right in front of him when he told me that he didn't want to be near me anymore and I just hope that I don't do that again.

He did break my heart once, but I'm going to make sure that he won't be able to again. I'm not sure if I'll be able to take it a second time.

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