What the hell had I gotten myself in to? 

My wolf took absolute control when we heard what Sam was saying to our mate. I was blinded by rage, and it took everything in me not to kill him on the spot.

Deirdra, Brittany, Elder Caroline, some of the trainers from the pack, and I were sitting in the living room going over the plan. For the next week, I was going to be training from sun up to sun down. I had no room for error here.

Samuel already had the upper hand just by being the Alpha. He was physically stronger than me purely because of his genetics. But, I was going to do everything I could to make it out of this alive. I didn't want to leave Deirdra because I got mad and wasn't being rational.

Elder Caroline had already gone to the pack house and discussed the rules of the challenge with him. Any foul play involved would make the other person the automatic winner of the challenge. So if I did anything that didn't abide by the rules, Samuel would automatically win, and vice versa.

"You will both be fighting in wolf form. It is usually your wolf's decision to challenge for Alpha, which is why you have to fight with your wolves. The use of silver, wolfsbane, or any kind of poison is prohibited. It does not have to be a fight to the death, but you do have to fight for submission. Whoever submits first, is the loser. Do you understand the rules?"

I was scared. I wasn't even going to try to hide it.

"I understand."

"Okay then. I need you to sign this form stating that I went over the rules of the challenge with you and that you understand that any foul play will have you automatically eliminated."

I took the pen and signed right below Samuel's name and signature.

I never knew there was a form you had to sign when you challenged somebody, it must be a new thing.

"I'm on your side, Rafael. You can do this. I have faith."

"Thank you, Elder Caroline. I hope you're right."

She nodded her head and let herself out.

Lucas, the lead trainer and pack warrior let out a long breath after she left.

"Raf, I hate to say it dude, but this is going to be hard. You know how much time he spends in the gym and how much time he has spent training. It's going to be hard, but I think you can do it. He's at the lowest point in his life right now. He's going to be sloppy. He's not going to be going for a submission, he's going to go for the kill. You can use that to your advantage."

At Lucas' words, Deirdra got up and stormed out of the living room and up the stairs, slamming the door behind her.

"She's pretty pissed, huh?"

"Yeah, she hasn't said a word to me since it happened. I think she understands that my wolf just wanted to protect our mate, but not why he had to challenge him."

Lucas nodded in understanding and went back to discussing training plans with me.

"We aren't going to be doing strength training for this. It's basically all going to be agility and defensive moves. All training will be done in your wolf form so you learn the accurate things."

"Sounds good. Let me go upstairs and get changed and we can get going."

"Good luck, dude." Lucas chuckled. He knew Deirdra was probably going to rip into me as soon as I walked in the room.

I trudged up the stairs, not looking forward to the ass chewing I was about to receive.

I walked in the room and Deirdra was sitting on the bed crying. It hurt me to see her like this, to know that she's feeling this way because of me.

"I'm sorry, Deirdra."

"I don't want to fucking hear it, Rafael. This could have been a decision we came to together, but no. You gave in to the animalistic side of yourself and lost control. Now I'm here and expected to be supportive of this decision. Well, I'm not. You could die in the fight, Rafael. Do you get that? And then what? I'll be left alone. My mate will be gone and I'll have no one. I can't just go back home, because everyone at home thinks I'm dead. You've said it yourself that wolves lose themselves when they lose their mates.

"Now that could be. I could be the wolf that loses herself because you weren't thinking, you were being selfish. So go. Go train. I will be there eventually, but right now I just want to be alone."

Her words hurt. I wanted her to be there with me, but I understood why she couldn't be right now.

"Do you want me to send Brittany up here? She isn't exactly happy with me either."

"Yes, please."

My heart was breaking, she wouldn't even look at me.

I walked over to the dresser and pulled out a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. I changed quickly and made my way out of the room, but turned back before I left.

"I love you, Deirdra. I'm sorry."

"Thank you."

I waited for a second but she didn't even look up, and she didn't tell me she loved me too. She was hurt. I could feel it. My wolf was trying to reach out to hers, but not even her wolf wanted anything to do with us right now.

I closed the door behind me and made my way back down the stairs.

"Hey, Britt. Could you go upstairs with Deirdra? She said she wanted you to go up there."

She didn't even answer me as she got up from her spot on the couch and made her way upstairs. She got about halfway up when she stopped and turned back to look at me. Hurt filled her eyes, and I knew I had majorly fucked up.

"What you did today was selfish. You basically agreed to potentially leave your mate alone and leaving me without any living family. As if losing mom and dad wasn't enough, now I could potentially lose you too." She shook her head and turned back around to go the rest of the way upstairs.

The two most important people in my life were hurt and heartbroken, and it was all because of me and my stupidity.

It was honestly a wake-up call and was lighting the fire within to do as best as I could to make it through this. Not just for the pack, but for Deirdra and Brittany as well.

I had a lot of work to do.