"I just remember most Summer Bashes being kind of lame, you know?" Brynn twists bouncy curls into a semi-loose knot atop her head. "I don't want it to be like it was for us, teenagers needing to get wasted to have a good time, you know?"

"Yeah," I flinch a little, the rumors of that summer flooding my mind.

Janet's high pitched gossiping is particularly loud.

You know, if that boy Luke Henson hadn't been drinking, he would've seen that bend in the road. Could've slowed sooner, or something. Hell - if he'd been straight, he wouldn't have gone that route at all so late at night!

What a waste. Such a sad, sad waste.

Blinking myself back to the present, I nod. "I get it."

There's no one who gets it more than I do.

Brynn's eyes soften, her thick brows touching over her nose.

She doesn't perseverate on it, though, doesn't stare at me with that pitying look for long.

"So what would have made it better for us, back then?" She changes the subject, biting the cap of her pen and crossing her legs beneath her.

"Better music, for one." I chuckle. "Talia's dad's 'mixes' are a bit... old fashioned."

"A DJ!" Brynn jots the idea in her binder, listing a couple of people who might be available. "That's a good one."

Laying down, the grass of her lawn prickling the back of my arms, I squint up at the sky, the clouds floating by leisurely, with no cares in the world.

"Another good one: not having our parents literally staring at us on the dance floor."

I smirk. I'll never forget the look on Mom's face when she caught Luke and me dancing a little too close for her liking.

With a "don't be an idiot" look for me and a dazzling smile to distract Mom, Casey was there to intervene before she made a fool out of me in front of all our friends.

"Maybe, like, an under 18 section, somewhere? Better music for them, some 'privacy', the cool photo booth..." I can practically see the gears going in Brynn's head.

Meanwhile, our photo booth remains backdrop-less at present. Apparently neither of us are creative enough to come up with something better than pre-teens squeezing a gorilla nipple.

Yet.

I'm confident we'll get there.

The back door slams closed and I block the sun with my hand, my whole body heating up as Luke comes into view, heavy looking boxes hoisted over both shoulders. My eyes trail down to where his shirt has pulled up, revealing a tan strip of his chiseled abs.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

I glare down at Brynn's yard, aggressively pulling grass from the dirt. My guilt makes me sick to my stomach, my revulsion at myself bringing bile up my throat.

Who hooks up with the guy who killed her brother?

Luke trots down the deck stairs, smiling his sexiest grin as he approaches us.

Idiots. That's who.

"Hello ladies," He sets the boxes down, adjusting his ball cap as he peers down at us, limbs and supplies spread out over our picnic blanket. "That should finally be enough paint for whatever that is you've got going on back there." He gestures over his shoulder to our miserable photo booth.

"What about you, Luke?" Brynn tosses her binder aside, laying in the grass beside me. "What was your favorite thing about Summer Bash?"

Luke's eyes flash to mine and I feel a blush spread over my cheeks before he looks away.

Clearing his throat, he shrugs casually. "Throwing back beers with the boys. What else?"

I roll my eyes just as Brynn scoffs. "The boys? You seem to forget who distracted our parents while the boys bought those beers."

Luke shrugs again, settling into the grass beside me. I sit up, moving a couple of inches away.

Noticing my glare, he winks. "What's your favorite part, Dyl?"

If it was just Luke, I wouldn't answer. But Brynn's watching me too, and she's just been so damn nice.

Deciding to test the waters, I keep my tone cool and even. "Going to the Coopers after for s'mores pie and movies till we fell asleep."

I keep my gaze locked on Luke but he glances away, fidgeting his baseball cap nervously.

Slowly, deliberately, Brynn replies, "S'mores pie, oh my God, I miss it. So... How is Maya these days?"

I notice a couple of things simultaneously.

One: the way Luke stills at Maya's name, every muscle frozen like he's been caught by fucking Medusa. One and a half: how bad it still hurts to see his reaction.

Two: how when Brynn asks the question, it's like she's not really looking at me. Technically she is, but it's like she's tensed, sensing Luke and his reaction more than mine.

And the third: the conclusion that if Brynn is asking me, she doesn't know herself.

Cocking my head to the side, I admit skeptically,
"The first time I've seen her in actual years was a couple weeks ago, outside the smoothie shop. So besides thirsty, I couldn't really tell you how she is."

Luke's head snaps up, a disturbed expression over his handsome features before he quickly composes himself, seeming highly interested in a beetle in the grass.

"You don't talk to her?" I venture curiously, glancing between the two of them.

"Not for awhile." Brynn glances at her hands. "But you two were so close, what... I mean, I just can't believe you lost touch."

"Lost touch," I chuckle humorlessly. My many unanswered texts and calls come to mind. "We talked for a little after... After. But I guess it was just too much."

My brows furrow at my own words. Seems pretty fucking selfish when I hear it like that.

"Oh." Brynn's reply is almost inaudible. "I'm sorry, Dyl." Her palm rests over my hand.

Luke stands abruptly, his demeanor totally changed from when he came by.

Good. I'm glad hearing about Maya makes him uncomfortable. Now he knows how I feel. How I felt?

I don't know.

But how predictable can my life get? I let Luke in, I indulge in his promises, turning into a complete traitor to my own brother, and his reaction just showed me Maya still affects him. Even now.

And again, I'm the fucking idiot.

In his haste to leave, Luke stumbles over our pitcher of lemonade, soaking the blanket and binder, and emptying our glasses in the wreckage.

"Shit, sorry." He blushes. "I'll get some towels and some-"

"I've got it." I jump to my feet, frustrated with him, with myself, with everything. How can I fall for the same shit twice? "You should get going."

Brynn doesn't acknowledge us, furiously trying to save her binder of notes.

"Dyl, come on." Luke mutters as I pass by, close enough to touch him but too briskly for him to get ahold of me. "Talk to me."

He's following me now, but I ignore him, not sure which is worse, my guilt or embarrassment.

Going so far as to close the door behind me, hoping it will deter him from trailing me, I let out a deep sigh as I collect towels and more lemonade from the kitchen.

Everything I need in hand, I turn and nearly bump into Luke.

With a groan, I roll my eyes.

God damn, this man just doesn't know when to let go.

what do we make of this conversation?
Luke?
Brynn?
Maya?
Dylan's attitude?
Ahhh! thanks for reading loves ❤️