(Lee's POV)
A couple of days had passed since Mark found me on the floor gasping for air, since the Bangtan boys left for their house knowing Jungwoo was locked up at last, since I ran to Jinyoung seeking safety and comfort and since Jinyoung's been acting weird and distant.

He rarely speaks and that's normal. But he's distant and I'm starting to think that maybe he doesn't feel the same way I do and I understand that. I cannot force everyone I love to love me back, it just doesn't work like that. But that doesn't mean that I won't tell him how I feel.

"Morning Junior.." I left a peck on his cheek while he was munching on his breakfast. He glared and did a ha-ha-ha-very-funny face.

"You seem cheerful this morning. Should I be concerned?" Jay asked as he hugged me from behind and kissed my neck causing me to smile.

"Ew, get a room." Mark said grumpily.

"Whatever. Jinyoung and I have plans for the day." I said.

"We do?" Jinyoung asked with a confused tone.

"Yes. We need to talk." The kitchen fell silent and it was a bit awkward. I started clapping. "So get your asses together and let's go. You guys need to head to the venue for the showcase." I said shooing the boys out of the kitchen. "And you are coming with me." I said to Jinyoung. He just nodded awkwardly. Each headed to their own room to get dressed for the day.

Once we settled in my car, I faced him. "We're gonna take a walk by the river, grab smoothies and protein shakes then drive back to the venue." He said nothing, just nodded and avoided eye contact. I shook any ideas out of my head as I drove to an isolated spot by Han river.

The walk by the river was silent and awkward. "Listen, you don't have to say anything I just need to tell you." I started but he held onto my elbow stopping me from walking further.

"Don't say it."

"Why? It's the tr-.."

"No! I said don't say it!!"

"Why?!!"

"It cannot be the truth. How can you say that to me? When you've already said it to the others?"

"Excuse me, what are you insinuating? That I'm a liar?"

"What? No. But you're too young to realize what love is. And what you're feeling isn't love."

He is NOT serious.

"You're not seriously telling me what and how I should feel."

"Lee, you're confused yo-.."

"No! You're the one who's confused! I KNOW I LOVE YOU, YOU ASSHOLE!"

I stormed off towards the car. I cannot believe he's underestimating my feelings. It would have been better if he rejected me like a decent human be-..

"I'm fucking scared!!" He yelled and I froze. "I'm scared that this may all turn out to be a dream." His voice was getting closer. "I'm scared you'd walk away and leave me! Leave US!" He spun me around to face him. "Can't you see how terrified I am of losing the best thing that ever happened to me?!!!" He ran his fingers through his hair, frustrated and annoyed. "I'd rather be your friend and nothing more than to get too attached and get myself hurt in the process." He sighed, letting me go.

"Jinyoung.."

"It's fine. I never wanted any of this."

"And you think I did? You think I intentionally wanted to love 4 different men with all of my heart? 4 IDOLS! 4 men I MANAGE!" I yelled back. "You think it's easy for me? Do you seriously think I haven't thought about the vague future where I don't know with whom I might end up with? Will I be left alone?!" I grunted and headed back to the car.

Once I reached the door, he gripped on my wrist and spun me around. "Then promise me you won't leave." He whispered. "Leenah I am ready to give you everything. I just need to know, need you to promise me that you won't leave us shattered into millions of pieces." He rested his forehead on mine. We both had silent tears running down our faces.

"You're crazy if you think I'd ever be able to leave.." I whispered with my eyes closed. Trying to stop the tears. Seconds later I felt his soft plump lips on mine, it was so gentle, so pure and innocent. It was so soft and slow as if he was afraid to break me.

Jinyoung has the toughest exterior, billions of walls built around his fragile soul. Once you walk through those thick and tall walls you'd be surprised by the pure innocence, the scarred heart and the loving soul that hide within. I took an oath to never take this opportunity for granted. My oath is to stay true before the 4 men I love so much. And no one can ever make me break that oath. Ever.

It's been a week since we ended our promotions for the new album. The boys earned 3 wins for this album and I couldn't be more proud to see their hard work paying off.

Jackson went back to China to participate in the jury of a contest show. Yugyeom traveled to the US to meet up with Cait. Jinyoung's busy promoting for his new show. Mark and Youngjae left the villa for their personal apartments. Bambam has been busy with Lisa. And I'm left with Jay.

We found a new loft that was cozy enough to fit both of us. It had a beautiful Han river view. We still had the villa of course but when on a break, this would be our sweet escape.

The weather was warming up so I took the opportunity to wear one of his baggy thin shirts after a cold shower that was well deserved since we finished unpacking.

I stood by the huge window admiring the view, as I held my glass of red wine in hand. I felt a hand sneaking onto my waist. "I can't believe this is real." I smiled when I felt his chin rested on the crook of my neck. I laid my head on his wide shoulder as I hummed a sigh.

"Specify 'this'.." I said before he took away my glass and left a pout on my face.

"You, here. Us, together." He shifted my body so I faced his chest, left a gentle kiss on my forehead. "I love you jagiya." He whispered.

"I love you too.." The words come naturally to me when I'm with him. When around him, always felt and still feel consumed with love, passion, jealousy, heat, affection, admiration and so much more.
I stood on my tiptoes to reach his lips but he just smiled backing away slightly. I raised an eyebrow.
Playing a game, are we.

"Tsk, Ms. Kim.. You thought kissing me is an easy mission?" He teased and I just curled my lips between my teeth and sighed. "Giving up already?"

Oh honey.. you have no idea..