Grayson Archer     

"Desired but never loved." -Frances Ivy

Everything was hell when I got home from dropping Alexia off. My once decently fun and spontaneous day seemed so far away and I ended up spending the night at the Fortress.

I walk into the kitchen to see Charlie up and eating a red apple. This takes me back to the time he and Shawn argued over if red or green apples were better. Shawn won the argument, bringing science and stuff into it. Of course. I mentally roll my eyes.

This is not normal for Charlie to be up this early, maybe Shawn and Kenan but him.

Weird.

"Man, I thought you'd never wake up." Charlie says like he's been waiting forever. I look at the clock to see it's 8 am, only an hour till I have to be on set. Hopefully, father time will do me a favor and make time go by slowly. " Oh please, you normally wake up way after me." I say, and grab an apple out of the basket taking a seat on a stool. "Plus four others live here." I add, pointing out he could have woken them up. " Yeah, but today Scarlett wanted to see the sunrise so I woke up early enough to take her, and Shawn is on his early morning work out and Kenan is just in his room. You know how moody they are." Charlie informs me. " It literally feels like I've been up for hours." Charlie draws out as he spins on the stool. " I bet." I say. " So after set time is over, we are rehearsing. We have a show coming up." Charlie says. " Alright." I reply.

I think about my plans while making eggs. I wonder what shooting the scene with Aaliyah will be like today and then I have the stupid kiss scene with Marina. Ugh, I hate her more than I dislike Alexia I swear I'd rather kiss her than Marina. God kill me now. As I'm cooking my eggs I find myself wondering what it would be like to kiss Alexia. One day with this girl and I wanna know what it's like to kiss her. Ew. That has to stop. God, I hate that stupid picture. I should have never looked.

"Hey, Aaliyah, Astrid, and Alexia are here for the set tour," Noah says. " Don't worry Emerson is giving them the tour, we just have to shoot some more scenes." Noah finishes. I sigh and get up. I know what's coming next. It's a kiss scene with Marina. I want to do anything but kiss her but this is an opportunity. Maybe I can get Alexia out of my head. Now I'm not going to go off and do anything. I have to kiss Marina anyways but I think kissing another person may be just what I need.

I make my way to the set, that's my "bedroom".

" Okay, this is simple. There are no lines, all you need to do is kiss your Daniella." Garner tells us. I almost threw up at the 'my Daniellia' part, there's no way I would ever want this girl to be my anything.

"Action!" The director calls. Marina gives some sort of seductive look that I hate as I hold her face in my hands.

I hate the way this feels. Good thing this is supposed to be a tension kiss or the time I'm taking to kiss her would be wasteful. I slowly lean into her and I try so hard not to back out but I slightly open my eye that's away from the camera and I see her leaning with a smile I shakingly pull away and drop my hand.

Why is this so hard?

I can do this. It's just a girl.

I lean back into Marina, trying to go full force but something about my body stops me and I just can't help but think of Alexia. Fuck! Alexia. I can't fucking kiss Marina because of Alexia.

" I-I'm sorry I can't." I stutter out. " Cut!" I hear someone yell out but it's not the director. I turn to see Emerson's dad, Mr.Hayden. Shit!

He's the Co-producer of the film with Emerson because she wrote it and she's the producer. "Not what was in the script but I think I like this better. It'll add tension for later." Emerson says as she walks up beside her dad. " Well, it's your movie if that's what you want." Garner says, tossing his hands in the air. Mr.Hayden just eyes me. " I'll make the changes. Perfect as always Gray." Emerson says. " Okay next is Noah and his love interest." The director calls out and I make my way to the side where the drinks are, while Marina stomps off the stage.

I could throw up right now. I think I'm breaking out in cold sweats.

" What happened out there?" Mr.Hayden asks, concerned. I draw the bottle of water to my lips and take a few gulps before putting it down-breathing heavily. " I don't know." I reply, breathy. " You know Emmy told me about this girl that's been stuck in your head." Mr.Hayden says and I glance up at him. " Of course she did." I mumble before drinking more water. " Maybe you should try the scene with the said girl and get her input on kissing someone else." Mr.Hayden suggests. " I don't need Alexia's permission to kiss someone." I reply, a little rougher than I intended. " You sure about that? Because I'm not the one who can't simply kiss someone. It's only a suggestion." Mr.Hayden says. " And what if I kiss Alexia and start to actually like her?" I ask. " I say handle that when you get there." Mr.Hayden says and pats my shoulder before walking off.

He may be right but liking someone is the last thing I need. Not after what happened before I don't need to like anyone else. Not right now. Not ever.

I've found a word to describe what I feel for Alexia. Attraction. That's what I feel and I hate feeling it.

I look over to the side of the set to see Alexia standing talking with Emerson. Okay, I'm going to take Mr.Hayden's advice. Not right now though. I walk off in the opposite direction to the break room, where the food and comfy couches are.

I go right over and pick up a donut out of the box." Really food when you have to kiss someone." I turn around and see Alexia standing in the doorway. " I don't wanna kiss her so I don't care." I reply and bite into the donut. " Of course, you don't." She says and walks into the room. " You know you really bombed it out there." Alexia states, looking around the room. " Ya know if I wanted to be insulted I would have called to my dad." I tell her, and she turns and looks at me. Probably surprised I'd say that. Jokes equal coping. Not healthy but it works.

" Why did you do so bad?" She asks, dragging her hand along the edge of the snack table while looking down at it. " I very much dislike that girl and honestly we've never practiced that scene. The director wanted it to be raw in emotion." I explain. " It definitely was." Alexia mumbles and I shoot her a glare which she just gives a fake smile back and I roll my eyes and take another bite of my donut. " Then just practice with someone," Alexia offers. " It can't be that hard."

" Go to hell." I tell her and bite into my donut. "And leave you here all alone. That would be mean." Alexia pouts and leans against the table beside me. Smart ass. She should really lose that attitude of hers.

" Okay genius what would you do when you haven't practiced with the person you have to do a scene with?" I ask. "First don't give me that tone and second I practice with someone else." She answers. I sit my donut on the table beside me and turn to Alexia. " Okay let's practice." I say. " Wait with me?" She asks, her voice slightly going higher. "Yes." I reply as I walk over to the table and pick up the script on it, flipping to the page we need. " Here are your lines." I say, handing her the book and she takes it.

Alexia looks over the lines before setting the book down. " Got it." She says. That fast, I wish I could say I'm impressed but she can do better.

" Why are you avoiding me, Hayden?"

" I'm not."

" You are, you've barely talked to me or been around me and you're supposed to be my best friend!"

" It's complicated Danny." I follow the stage directions and try to walk around and she grabs my wrist. " Then explain." She says. Man, she's good at this. How is she good at this? She's even giving those begging eyes and I'm getting lost in them. Stop it! " I can't. Not yet." I breathe out. " Why?" There's supposed to be a pause here before I kiss her and tell her she has to wait till tonight. I can't actually kiss Alexia though, even if we are acting.

I turn around In her grasp and walk closer, placing my hand on the side of her face. Her face is so soft. I lean in and I can tell I'm close by her breath fanning on my face but I don't kiss her, I stand there for a moment and then lean back. " I promise I'll explain later." I say. I wanted to kiss her but if I ever do get another chance I want it to be special and not acting. Not that I'm going to actually kiss her one day.

" See you can do it! Now, remember next time just kiss the person." Alexia says, coming back to her regular self. " Are you saying you wanted me to kiss you?" I ask, one to annoy her, and two I'm curious about her answer. " In your dreams." She replies with a smile and leaves the room.

She's right in my dreams.

We've started Aaliyah's feature in the movie. Which doesn't involve me so I can leave. I'm in my dressing room packing up and as I am walking up to the door I get ready to walk out when I see Mariana walk into Alexia with her red slushie and it splashes on Alexia's light green shirt and white pants. She's trying to wipe it off and looks utterly upset about it. I kind of want to laugh but I want to help her as well.

"Need some help with that? Also, how did this happen?" I ask, approaching her. " Mariana" Alexia answers, still trying to wipe it off. " Come one, let's fix it." I say and grab her hand, which she immediately wiggles her hand out of. I tried. We walk to the extra custom room. We have a room here for customs we may need soon and backup ones in case one gets ruined.

I walk in and go over to Daniella's rack and go to the backup section and pull out a black short sleeve fitted dress. " Here, it's only a backup, no one will care." I say. Alexia takes the dress and takes her bookbag off and she kicks off her black converse before walking to the in-room restroom.

A minute later she comes out in the dress. " Thank you." She says. " No problem. I can wash those if you want." I offer. " It's fine. I already have to get a shirt from Scarlett." Alexia says. " Are you positive?" I ask. " Yeah, it's fine Grayson." She says, grabbing a plastic dress bag and putting her stained clothes inside before compacting the bag and stuffing it in her book bag.

I take a second to look at her in the black dress. It looks incredible on her. The simple black details of the dress stand out on her and the cut out between the breasts shows off just the right of cleavage. Her body looks amazing in it. You can definitely tell she plays a sport and whatever it is, is doing her ass some favors.

"So do you have any plans?" Alexia asks. "Got to get my sister from our mom's and then band practice at mom's." I tell her. " That sounds interesting." Alexia says. " Oh yeah being in a car with Kenan, Charlie, and Nevea is totally fun." I say sarcastically. " Charlie is probably fun to ride with." Alexia says. " Yeah, you try it." I state and grab my bag. " Speaking of Charlie, he's calling me." I say feeling my phone vibrate in my pocket and pulling it out.

As we start to leave the room, she puts on her red chrome bookbag. I can see Alexia outside the room waiting for me as I listen to Charlie ramble. "Charlie slow down, what do you want?" I stop him. " I think you should bring Lexi to rehearsal. Scar wants to see her again and Kenan and Raven want to meet her." Charlie says. "You must be joking." I state flatly. "No, pretty please. Please. Please. Please." Charlie says, starting to beg. "Fine, just never do that again." I say. Charlie says to celebrate on the other side of the phone and hangs up. I sigh and walk to the door. Alexia turns around to me. "Looks like you're invited to a rehearsal. The band wants to meet you and you'll be meeting my mom and sister." I tell her.

Alexia gives me wide eyes and I see the excitement fill her face. I feel the need to say something but she holds her finger up meaning for me to hold on. She pulls out her phone and types then waits and replies before putting it up. When she reads her phone she slightly jumps up and down before calming herself. " Great, my mom said I can go." Alexia says. " Are you sure you wanna come?" I ask. " I didn't ask my mom for no reason." She states. "What if I try to kill you?" I ask and she gives me a side look. "I'd murder you first, Popstar. Don't try me." She replies and walks off in front of me.

Her presence bothers me and somehow I keep ending up with her.

We go back to the set and she grabs her oversized white zip-up jacket that has a skull on the back and comes over to me and we head out to my black Jeep. I drove the Jeep today just for this reason. " How many cars do you have?" Alexia asks. " Five." I answer. " Why does an eighteen-year-old need all those cars?" She asks as I open her car door for her. I don't answer because she gets in and I close the door. " I like cars." I say and get in on the driver's side. " You didn't have to open the door I could have." Alexia says while putting on her seatbelt. " Don't be an ass. Appreciate the fact that I'm being a gentleman." I state.

We back out of the parking lot and go to Kenan's first and then we get Nevea and Charlie.

"Do we need swimsuits this time?" Nevea asks. " No idea." I reply. "Order one just in case." Kenan says and he hands her his phone. This is unfortunate for Charlie because he loves sitting in the middle when he's in the back but this time Nevea has that place. " I don't have a swimsuit." Alexia whispers over to me and it sends chills down my back. Fuck, what was that for? Since we are at a red light I take out my phone and open it to Forever 21(don't ask Bea made me download it) and hand it to her. I lean over and she meets me in the middle. " Just order and press same day within thirty minutes of delivery and click the second delivery address and it will go to my mom's house. I'll text and let her know." I tell her. " This is the second favor you've done for me today. " Alexia says. " What surprised?" I ask. " That you have a heart, maybe." She replies.

" What are you two whispering about?" Charlie asks, leaning across Nevea. " None of your business jackass." I reply. I continue driving and we stop for a bathroom break because of Nevea and I get gas just in case filling up the car and Kenan and Alexia go to get snacks.

Charlie runs over to me from the bathroom almost falling. "Damn, is the store about to blow up or something." I say, giving him a strange look. Charlie breathes out heavily and opens his phone showing me something.

There in front of my face is Nevea. But Nevea with no top on and boobs out. No, I'm not jumping to conclusions it could be for Kenan but considering the message below it says ' if you want to I want to.'

I'd say not .

" I don't know what to do." Charlie panics. Charlie is the golden retriever- teddy bear. He hates these problems because he's not a mean person but he doesn't want to start a conflict even I don't know how to handle this. I'm a dick I'd just block her and move on. " Tell Scar." That is the first thing I say. " Yeah duh but what about Kenan?" Charlie asks. Mhm, I forgot about that.

I look around to see Neavea coming back along with Kenan and Alexia. " Hand me your phone." I tell Charlie and he does. I type No and press send then block Nevea off his phone. " Done. Now tell Scar and we'll figure the rest out." I tell him and finish up getting gas.

The ride for the rest of the way is awkward. I was looking forward to showing Alexia what I have to deal with when making these drives but Charlie doesn't even speak.

We get to my mom's house and Charlie is the first out followed by Kenan and Nevea. " We'll meet you inside." Alexia says and I look at her but she doesn't look at me. I close my door and she takes off her seatbelt.

" Explain this." She demands, showing me my phone. My heart drops. There is a message from Nevea to me. The same one Charlie got. " I swear it's not what you think." I state. This looks bad. "You better not be hooking up with your friend's girlfriend." Alexia scolds me. "That girl, fuck no! I do not want her. Look Charlie got the same picture and I have no idea what's happening but I plan on finding out." I tell her and get out of the car, slamming my door.

I've already been fucked over by a girl and I don't want the same to happen to Kenan even if they have been dating for years.