If I could be with you tonight
I would sing you to sleep
Never let them take the light behind your eyes
I'll fail and lose this fight
Never fade in the dark
Just remember you will always burn as bright  

-The Light Behind Your Eyes by My Chemical Romance

DELILAH

When I woke up it was still dark. I heard whispers and it took me moment to recognize it was my parents talking about something. I felt different, strange though I couldn't really describe it. The memories of what happened were there; faint but real and painful.

"Mom?" My throat was dry and it hurt to speak.

Everything hurt.

"Right here, darling," she replied. I sat up with her help, happy that at least for a moment the constant dull ache in my back had disappeared. She gave me a glass of water and my gaze traveled to the figure sleeping on the sofa in the bedroom.

"He's been sleeping for a couple hours," my dad said with a small smile. "He didn't want to wake you."

I nodded. He must have been feeling terrible as well.

"Can we spend the rest of the night here?" My mom asked, running her fingers through my hair. "In case you need something, to help out with Adrian."

I nodded absentmindedly, still looking at Liam's form. "I'll help set up the other room."

"Oh no, dear, you need to rest," my mom said. "We can handle it just fine."

"Do you want to wake him?" My dad asked.

"Please," I whispered.

He looked uncomfortable in the sofa and I felt bad for neglecting his pain and hurt. I'd been so consumed in my own grief that I hadn't paid attention to his. I smiled when Liam looked over at me with concern. He sighed, relief covering his face when he realized that I was okay. After a few words with my parents, they exited the bedroom leaving Liam and I alone.

He undressed down to his boxers and laid down next to me, both of us on our sides facing each other. There was so much to say, yet I only managed to whisper, "I love you."

Liam moved a strand of hair from my face which I'm sure looked like a mess; tear stained and probably my eyes swollen.

"I look like shit, don't I?"

"You look breathtakingly beautiful," he murmured.

"Oh don't do that," I teased in a quiet voice. "You know I look crappy."

Liam wrinkled his nose, "You're the most most beautiful crappy looking person I've seen."

Despite the night we'd had, I giggled softly and finally got closer to him, letting him hold me. My eyes closed, my body relaxing in his hold in an instant.

"How are you feeling?" Liam asked.

"I'm not sure," I replied. "I'm not sure how I should feel. And you?"

"I'll be fine," he said with a sigh. "We will be fine."

"Have you told anyone else?"

Liam shook his head no, taking my hand in his and kissing the back of it. "I won't say anything. Not until you're ready."

"We need to talk to Adrian," I said, closing my eyes. That was going to be the difficult part. Seeing the disappointment in his face, answering questions to which we didn't know the answer.

It seemed like it was test after test, like we were barely beginning to start to stand back up and then life kicked us down once again. It wasn't fair.

These tests were much too dificult.

"Are you still in pain?" Liam asked. I felt his thumbs digging into my lower back in a gentle massage, one that was very much appreciated.

"Not much but that feels good," I whispered.

The tension slipped away and I started feeling drowsy. Liam simply kept up the massage until we were both asleep, forgetting for a few more hours the chaos endured.

*****

A soft kiss on my lips woke me up. Typically the sun through the windows would awaken me, I must have been so tired that I didn't feel it. My eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the brightness in the room and Liam was looking down at me with a sad smile.

"Good morning, love."

He leaned down, pressing another tender kiss on my lips and bringing his hand to my belly. My heart constricted; I ignored it.

"Good morning," I whispered back. "What time is it?"

"It's ten past noon."

My eyes widened in horror. Adrian had school and we'd slept through it. "Adrian missed-"

"Yes, he missed school. Calm down, babe. Your parents have been watching him all day. They wanted you to rest."

"They're still here?"

Liam nodded.

I sat up quietly, feeling a rush of emotion. I was desperately hoping that when I woke up reality would be different, that wasn't the case though. We'd have to work through this together, but at the moment I felt so far away from Liam, from everyone. It was as if a wall had built around my heart, one that I was terrified of knocking down. 

"I need to get in the shower," I said. At least in there I'd be able to cry without him knowing. 

"I'll help you."

Liam helped me stand up, and we walked together to the restroom. I pulled up the shirt I wore, and followed by removing the pijama pants. I didn't want to take off my underwear where there would be more evidence of our loss. Moreover, I didn't want Liam to see it. I knew it would break him. 

"Can you get inside?" I asked of him. He wanted to argue, I saw him debating whether or not to do as I said until I whispered, "Please, Liam. I need to do this alone."

Liam let out a breath and kissed my forehead before getting in the shower. I don't know how much time I stood there, nearly naked and trying to prepare myself for what I could possibly see. Perhaps I'd get through the pain soon, maybe it one day it would all be a horrible memory, but for now I didn't feel strong, I didn't feel brave. 

With a trembling hand I started pulling my underwear off along with the pad I wore. There was blood, quite a bit of it and I quietly whimpered as I faced reality once again. I threw both items in the trash, silently praying that the baby that still lived would continue to have a beating heart. 

After a few more seconds I finally stepped into the shower where Liam stood, eyes closed, leaning against the tile wall. I closed the curtain behind me, getting his attention. He stretched out his hand, and though I saw him trying to mask it, the pained look on his face was proof enough of what he felt.

"Are you... Is everything okay?"

"As okay as it can be," I replied, my voice breaking at the end. 

I knew this would probably be the time where we talked about it. I'd spent the previous night with my mom and when Liam came to bed we didn't really discuss anything. This I wouldn't run from, not when he was with me trying to give me his support.

I cried silent tears in the shower as the warm water cascaded on us, they didn't manage to wash away the pain.

"I feel guilty," I whispered. His hold tightened around me, but he didn't say anything waiting for me to continue. "Maybe if I'd taken better care of myself or if I-"

"No, don't do this," Liam interrupted, cupping my face in his hands. His eyes were red. "It's not your fault, it's not anybody's fault. God, Delilah... Please believe me when I say it's not your fault. Please, please don't feel guilty. You need to believe that, and we need to believe that everything happens for a reason, even this."

"We still have Adrian babe, and we have the precious little one still growing inside you. There's so many good things awaiting for us in the future, and yes, this fucking hurts, but we'll be stronger for it." Liam exhaled shakily, leaning his forehead on my own, holding my naked body flush against his. "Please, Delilah... Let's get through this together. Don't forget I'm with you, don't forget that we're together, that we will get through this together. You're not alone, my love."

The last part did it for me. 

"Okay," I whispered, kissing him. Needing to feel the peace that only he provided. The water was starting to chill, but neither of us cared. It did nothing for us, not with the ache we already felt. In fact, it proved numbing. There was something therapeutic in the way he caressed me, holding me tight, as if letting me go would devaste him too. 

We broke the kiss, both of us needing some air and his eyes met mine, intense and raw and so full of emotion. 

"I love you," he whispered. "We'll get through this together."

He didn't break the intense gaze as he knelt down in front of me, kissing my small bump. I closed my eyes, and sobbed, knowing very well that he was doing the same thing in silence. 

Few times in my life, if ever, had I felt so broken.

And few times had I seen Liam so shattered.

We had each other though, that wouldn't change, we just had to remember it. 

The water was cold when we finally stepped out. Liam wrapped me up in a towel and helped me get dressed, even when I insisted I could do it on my own. 

"I don't know how to tell Adrian," I said with a sigh while he put my feet into some slippers. 

"Neither do I, Lilah. We'll do it together though, okay?"

I replied with a small smile, and together, we stepped out of the bedroom, hand in hand and ready to confront our reality.

*****

The first person we saw was my dad. He gave me a hug, placed a kiss on my forehead and then walked away. It was his wordless way of saying that he was with us no matter what, much like he'd been from the start. 

"Mommy!" Adrian exclaimed, running towards us and hugging me. I saw Liam tense, afraid that he might hurt me but it was by far the most comforting thing our son could have done. "Are you feeling better?"

Not really.

"Yes, buddy. How are you?" 

"Good, momma. I'm happy you're feeling better. How is my little brother or sister?"

I glanced over at my dad who was speaking quietly with Liam. My mom then stepped out of the kitchen, placing her hand on my shoulder.

"We explained to Adrian what happened, dear," she said. "I know it wasn't our place, but he was worried and, we just thought it would be better to help you two out that way."

My eyes filled with tears for the millionth time in the past few hours and I hugged my mom. "Thank you, mom, for everything," I choked out. 

"Of course, dear. Now come on, Adrian and I prepared brunch for you and Liam. You still need to eat, okay?"

If there was one good thing that had come out of this heartbreak, was my mom talking to me. Though I wished it would have been under different circumstances, I cherished every hug and every comforting word that came out of her mouth. Had she turned her back on me this time it would have been too difficult to recover. 

Eventually, Liam and I would have to talk to Adrian about the situation, but for now he seemed at ease. A little bit sad, yet still smiling and talkative like his usual self. 

After brunch, my mom and dad stayed around with the excuse of helping out. I knew they were grieving too, though. It was their grandchild after all. I cradled my small bump while I took in everything that happened. I still had so much left, so many people that cared for us. 

I had a loving son, and a baby growing inside me that I would protect with my life. I had a man that loved me, flaws and everything, and I loved him. They would be my motivation, as would the child I would never meet. I would be able to move on, I would be stronger for it. 

We didn't tell anyone else for the time being, deciding it was best for us to process things first. 

Liam shifted on the sofa, pulling me closer to him before setting his hand on top of mine. "I love you," he murmured. 

He kept repeating it, giving me the reassurance that I needed. I pecked his lips softly, told him I love him too, and then let myself hope. 

We wouldn't give up, not after everything we'd been through.

*****

A/N: Will they make it through this?

The next couple of chapters will be a bit lighter... sort of. 

Someone comes back... Actually, two people come back.

Guess who?

Thanks for reading!

-Luz