Wash the sorrow from off my skin

Show me how to be whole again

-Castle of Glass by Linkin Park

DELILAH

A body has been found.

As I walked into the station I held on to my clutch for dear life. I felt numb, like I was in an alternate universe and I wasn't actually living through what was happening. I kept hoping that someone would wake me up and laugh at the horrible nightmare this all was.

Except it wasn't.

I saw it in the faces of the officers that looked at me with pity. They pitied the destroyed mother that walked numbly into their station. I tried to ignore the looks but couldn't help but feel worse than I already did. Detective Jameson approached from the hallway with a sorrowful look on his face.

"Delilah... I'm awfully sorry to have called you under these circumstances," Detective Jameson said. I could tell it wasn't just some rehearsed line.

"When did you find him?" I asked with a shaking voice.

"This morning," he said as we walked down a hallway.

Like in the park the day before, I couldn't breathe. Anxiety began taking over within seconds of approaching the door that would possibly show me how cruel this world could be. I stopped with a heaving chest and leaned against the wall. "I can't," I breathed. "Oh my God, I can't do this."

Detective Jameson stopped, placing a hand over my shoulder. "Hey, I'll be there. Would you rather me call Liam?"

Just the thought of Liam having to see Adrian, or anyone else, in that condition made me falter. I couldn't allow that, not when this was all my fault. "No," I said quietly. "I'll go."

The detective seemed to hesitate for a moment before opening the door we stood in front of. I gasped at the methodical way everything had been set up. A small body, from what I could tell about the size of Adrian, laid there with a white sheet over it. The smell in the room... there was no description for it. I found myself stuck to the floor.

A gentle hand soothed my arm. "Take your time," he said.

We walked to the side of the immobile body. Shivers covered every part of my skin. I gulped, unable to believe that I was really facing this situation.

"Can... Can you uncover...him?" I asked in a small voice.

"Of course," he said. Before doing so, he prepared me for what I was about to see. "This boy was run over, Delilah. There... But you should be able recognize him if it is indeed Adrian."

I closed my eyes while the detective pulled the sheets back. When I could finally bring myself to confront the sight before me, I gasped sharply, covering my face in my hands.

Bloodied and deformed.

A loud cry left my lips as I stumbled back, unable to process it. "Oh my God," I sobbed. Detective Jameson pulled me away from the body, and I backed into a wall.

How could something like this happen to an innocent child? I couldn't comprehend it. The world was a cruel place but I was only now beginning to see and experience it. My body trembled as I tried to muffle my sobs with my hands. I wanted to control it, to erase the pain and heartache but it came back full force when my eyes closed and I saw the image of the bloodied body.

I heard a soothing voice and then felt myself being pulled into someone else, comforting arms wrapped around me.

"I'm so sorry," the detective whispered.

I wanted to speak, wanted to say so many things but the words were stuck. I felt weak, like my legs were going to give up on me any moment. Sensing this, the detective held me up and I heard him radioing for someone.

It was the last thing I heard before everything went dark.

*****

When I came to, the blinding lights of the clinic met my eyes. I squinted and groaned. I was so tired.

"There she is," I heard Detective Jameson saying.

The memories of what I had just seen flooded my brain. I pushed back the depressing thoughts, gaining strength to speak.

"It isn't him," I whispered.

"What?"

"The boy... it's not Adrian." My throat felt like it was going to close up once again and I tried to breathe through it. "It was too much to see him like that," I explained.

I struggled to sit up and the detective helped me. "So it's not him?"

"It isn't." I closed my eyes, wishing away the dreadful image of the little boy. "But please find his family. He deserves to have a proper funeral."

"We're working on it," the detective said with a sad smile. "For whatever it's worth, I'm glad it's not your son."

"Me too," I whispered.

I laid back down feeling lightheaded. I didn't have anything to eat the night before or for breakfast and it was starting to take a toll on me. Another officer approached the detective and they stepped out to talk about whatever it was they needed to discuss.

The boy wasn't Adrian and as happy as I felt about that, I couldn't help but feel sadness. He was still a young, innocent kid. I hoped he had a family yet something told me he was probably out in the streets for a while, and more than likely homeless. How many people die out in the streets without their families even knowing?

Do people actually stop looking for their loved ones after some time?

Please, let Adrian be okay.

It was astounding how much I'd taken for granted. Now it was all slipping through my fingers and I didn't know how to stop it.

I wanted to do something but felt helpless. Every time I thought I'd gained some self control something would overwhelm me.

"Hey," Detective Jameson said, knocking gently against the door. "I'm heading out. Do you need a ride home?"

"Uh, sure."

"Good," he smiled. I stood up under his watchful eye. "We'll get you something to eat too because I'm pretty sure that's the reason you passed out."

"Thank you," I replied.

The detective seemed like a serious person from afar, but I could tell that he truly cared about what he did and the people he helped.

Once in his car, I let myself relax for a moment. Even then, the city looked completely foreign. It all looked dim... pointless. I found myself searching for him, hoping that maybe he'd pop up somewhere and I'd be able to hug him and take him home.

"We're airing a segment on the news today," Detective Jameson said, reading my thoughts. "I haven't asked this because I know how unsettling it can be for parents, but if you'd like, local stations could interview you and Liam. Sometimes that helps."

"I don't know that I can talk in front of a camera without breaking down," I replied quietly.

"I understand, but perhaps Liam or a close friend of yours could speak. It helps the public put a face to the family and that motivates them to help search," he explained. "What do you want to eat?"

"Oh, no. Don't worry about it, detective I-"

"First of all, just call me Brian. We're going to be discussing some heavy stuff and it's best if we're on a first name basis. Second, you can't help in looking for your son if you are not well yourself," he glanced over to me while at a red light. "You need to eat, keep yourself strong so that when he comes back you can be there to hold him because you will have him back."

Feeling reassured by the detective's words, I let myself hope. Adrian was a smart and strong young boy. He would be okay. He had to be.

"Let's get you a cheeseburger," he muttered, going through the nearest drive through. I wasn't hungry but wasn't able to deny his offer. After our order was given to us, he handed it to me and I forced myself to take a bite. 

"Oh come on," the detective sighed. "I don't want to have to force you to eat it."

"I'm just not hungry," I mumbled.

"Well, you can't go around fainting." 

I nodded, once again taking another bite. Halfway through, I stopped, feeling nauseous. He seemed satisfied with the small amount of food I ate and handed me a lemonade that I could drink. The small amount of food did wonders though, giving me some much needed energy. 

Shortly after, we arrive to Liam's house. His car is there so I know that I won't be alone, still, the detective walked me up to the door. 

"Thank you for everything," I said. 

"No, thank you. It was nice talking to someone outside of the station." 

The door opened and Liam looked surprised for a moment. "Detective Jameson, did something happen?"

"No... sort of," I replied, running my hand through my hair. Liam raised his eyebrows in question, his gaze traveling between the detective and I. 

"May I come in?" Brian asked, seeing Liam's questioning glare.

Everything that Liam asked, the detective answered. He wasn't too happy to know that I had seen the body of child on my own and that I had fainted. If anything, he seemed rather pissed off that he hadn't been the one with me. By the way Liam's hand rested on my thigh, I could sense that there was something else bothering him. 

After a long conversation and agreeing to interview with a local news station, the detective left, assuring us that he'd be working hard to find any leads. 

"You should have called me as soon as he did, Delilah," Liam said. His tone was even but angry.

I pressed my lips together. There wasn't much I could say. All I knew was that at the time, I believed it was the best decision. I didn't regret it. The image of that little boy was engraved in my memory, it would haunt me for the rest of my life. No matter how pissed Liam was, I would never, ever regret my choice. 

"Nothing to say?"

I shook my head. If he was expecting an apology he wouldn't get it. 

"Are you feeling better?" He asked, walking towards me and placing his hands on my neck. I nodded, closing my eyes at his soft touch. I savored his the feel of his hands on my skin until his lips met mine in a slow kiss. Though I wasn't expecting it, my tongue met his almost immediately.

He groaned, deep in his throat, pulling me flush against his chest with an arm wrapping around my waist and his other hand holding my head in place.  It was a slow perfect dance between our two lips, eager and hungry to taste each other.

I moaned into his mouth feeling how he lifted me up, and took me over to the sofa, lying me down with such gentleness it made my heart stutter.

"Fuck... I miss you," he whispered. With the way he said it, I knew he meant more than the physical aspect. His hand went down to my leg, hooking it around his waist as he pushed himself against me. I whimpered, not breaking the kiss and placing my hand over his pounding heart.

"Liam, I-"

My words were cutoff by intense knocking on the door. Liam pulled away from me quickly, fixing his jeans. He smiled at me, tracing my lips with his thumb.

"I'll be right back," he said.

I had been about to tell him I loved him. The words were at the tip of my tongue. I recognized the voice that came from outside as soon as I heard it. I rushed to the door, standing next to Liam and barely registering the words that left the detective's lips.

*****

A/N: What brought Detective Jameson back to the house? 

Any ideas?

Hmm, should I post the next chapter?

& you guys seriously have no clue how much I love Linkin Park.

Leave your thoughts and comments. 

-Luz