A/N: Picture above is of Waikiki, taken by my photographer sister! So many of her photos have been inspiration for my settings in my stories. Follow her on Instagram: @prestesfilm 

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The plane ride was kind of awkward—other than the views as we descended toward an ocean colored with the most vivid blues and greens I'd ever seen. Grace had wanted to sit next to me—hell no—so I'd told Anika to sit with her instead. I figured that could be her way to pay me back for the invite, but her and Grace seemed to get along well enough. 

And finally... Honolulu. I had no idea how much I'd missed the sun. Anika squinted at the light, looking like she'd just stepped onto a different planet.

"This is amazing!" Talia exclaimed, even though we were still at the airport, surrounded by concrete pillars as we waited for the Uber. "Grace... I know I already said this, but I really appreciate you bringing us here."

"It's no problem," Grace said with a smile. "I don't know you very well, but you're Romy's sister, and that means you're like a daughter to me."

Bullshit, I thought.

"And I'm the reject foster child," Anika added.

I laughed while Talia and Grace froze, taken aback by the joke-they-probably-didn't-understand-was-a-joke. They'd get used to Anika's deadpan sense of humor soon enough.

Talia muttered, "You're not a reject..."

But before Anika could respond, the Uber showed up. And after a twenty-minute drive through infamous Honolulu traffic, the bustle and commotion of cars shielding the view of the ocean, we arrived in Waikiki.

Once a retreat for Hawaiian royalty; now the focal point for tourists on the south shore of the island. I used to hate it while we lived here—everyone loved to hate on Waikiki except for Grace—but now it filled me with nostalgia. After hauling my suitcase from the Uber, I took in the sights, even spotting the sushi place we used to go to all the time. More restaurants, towering hotels, souvenir shops, and designer stores lined the crowded Kalakaua Avenue.

Tourists passed us on the sidewalk, speaking in all kinds of different languages. I recognized Japanese immediately, but also Chinese and even... German. Weird. How did I know what German sounded like now?

Beyond the famous statue of Duke Kahanamoku—one of my dad's idols—I recognized the beach where I almost drowned. With all the tourists around, you'd think someone would've stepped in to help me, but the current took me away instead.

Good thing I was always good at keeping my head above water.

Grace led us to the beachside resort we'd stay at. People in slippers with sunburned cheeks came in and out of the revolving doors. Little kids yelled in the lobby. I had to arch my head far back to see the crazy high ceiling. And after checking in, we got on an elevator and went up twenty levels before getting to the double room—Grace would stay in one, and us three pseudo-sisters would stay in the other. Both rooms had a view of the beaches of Waikiki. Surfers looked like little ants chasing after the waves, and boats lined the horizon as the blue of the ocean deepened.

"I need to get changed," Talia said. "Look at that ocean; can we please to go the beach today?"

"Not that beach," I said. "There's a lot more to see on the eastern part of the island."

"I booked a resort for a reason," Grace said. "So we don't need to travel far. There's everything we need here."

Families and crowds piling in for the holidays, all going shopping and eating and clubbing at the most commercial region of the island? No thanks, but I wasn't the one paying.

"You're such a tourist, I don't get it," I groaned.

"Here the resort has a private section of the beach," Grace said. "It won't be as crowded."

"Can we go there?" Talia asked, already excited.

I set down my suitcase. "Only if we get lunch first."

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We went to this local poke bar—Anika and Talia hadn't tried poke bowls before, and I wouldn't let them leave O'ahu without it.

Anika silently observed the people coming in and out of the restaurant. If she still thought this was a human trafficking scheme, her easygoing posture and curious eyes didn't show it.

Talia kept trying to make small talk, but right now, I was channeling more of that Jack energy. I preferred the calm silence, but something weighed on my mind as we waited for our food to come.

"Are we going to visit family for Christmas?" I asked Grace. I'd done my best at ignoring her, but now I stared straight into her eyes, which were uncanny mirrors of mine.

"The family I still talk to are in Vegas now," she said. "Remember?"

"What about grandpa Tetsuo's family?"

She set her phone down. "We're not in contact anymore."

"They cut you off? Is it because you got way more of his inheritance than you deserved?"

She nodded. "They were upset. But I wasn't the one who wrote the will."

"Why didn't you just give them the money so they could leave you alone?"

"...I wanted to use it to take care of you."

I winced at her fake compassion. "I'm sure there was enough to go around. But it's okay, I get it. You're greedy." I smiled. "I'm the same way."

She narrowed her eyes. I smiled wider, almost challenging my sweet mother to say what was really on her mind.

Grace. Tetsuo's favorite child; now the family's disgrace (pun intended). I wondered where his ashes were scattered. And who was left from his side of the family anyway? His wife died from cancer before I was born. Grace had one workaholic brother who didn't have kids. Tetsuo had a few sons in Japan from his first marriage, and maybe they were the ones bitter about the inheritance.

I'd never stopped to think about how small my family actually was. They came from all over the world, which gave the illusion of something expansive, but those near me... those left in Hawai'i... very few.

And for now, I had to accept this as my family for the holidays: my ex-convict mom. My ex-juvenile-delinquent friend. And my stepsister who'd already gotten sunburned from the brief walk to the restaurant.

Christmas would be... interesting.

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At the beach, Anika didn't hesitate before disappearing into the ocean. We'd stopped at a store earlier for new bathing suits, and I was really feeling myself in this bikini—white with orange floral print. My curves hadn't seen the sun in a year.

Talia sat in the shade of the umbrella to apply copious amounts of sunscreen. As the palest out of all of us, she needed it.

I relaxed against the sound of the waves. To my far left, I saw Diamond Head—the extinct volcano toward the eastern part of the island that served as a backdrop to every Waikiki picture.

Did Dad miss it? His surfer lifestyle before Grace went to prison and the small profits from competitions didn't cut it anymore? He was no Duke Kahanamoku, so he went back to school to study software engineering. Why? Because it made money. That was the only reason we'd moved to Seattle in the first place.

But I wondered... was his heart still here?

Talia went out into the water, leaving me with Grace. I considered sitting closer to her on the beach towel and striking up a conversation. But what would I do? Taunt her? Demand an apology? I wasn't here for another episode of the family drama soap opera. Even though the nostalgic scenery around us would be perfect for it.

I left her to tan by herself on the sand. I jumped into the water, welcoming the cold shock on my bare skin to distract me from any leftover memories. I found Talia and Anika already waist-deep in the waves.

"You have sunscreen all over your face," Anika was telling her, smiling. "The ghost of the sea."

Talia rubbed at her cheeks. "It didn't absorb? Damn it!"

I came up behind her and put my hands on her shoulders. She jumped, letting out a shriek until she realized it was just me.

"Thought I was a shark?" I laughed.

Talia splashed me, drenching my hair in water. Anika fixed her gaze on my necklace—the one Jack gave me. Her gold eyeliner hadn't worn off yet, and against the afternoon sun, she looked like some kind of ethereal mermaid coming toward me.

With Talia the ghost haunting us both.

"What is that stone?" Anika asked.

"It's citrine," I said. The orange-gold color matched the hibiscus flowers on my bikini—and a really dumb part of me wondered if Jack would notice.

"I didn't realize you were into New Age crystal magic now."

"I'm not."

"But her boyfriend is!" Talia chimed in. "He gave her that necklace for her birthday. Isn't that the sweetest thing?"

I dove under a wave, and when I came back up for air, I said, "He's not my boyfriend."

"Do you want him to be?" Talia asked.

Did I? None of my boyfriends in the past had ever been serious. Was I even capable of that? I didn't care for the whole boyfriend-girlfriend label. The idea of referring to Jack as something so basic and overused felt wrong.

Anika, staring into the distance without blinking once, said, "Dating is a waste of time."

Talia raised a sunscreen-coated eyebrow. "Oh. Maybe you're just a late bloomer." 

"Bloom? I believe that entering a relationship is when you start withering and dying," Anika said, laying back to float. "But I do like your necklace, Romy. The salt water will cleanse it. Salt water cleanses the spirit like nothing else."

I touched the golden stone. "Let's see if you're right."

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Instead of going for dinner, the four of us—jet-lagged and halfway to zombie mode—showered and crashed in the resort room.

Grace had a king-sized bed all to herself. Me and Anika shared the other bed, and Talia decided to sleep on the pull-out couch in our room, opting to spare us from her snoring, thrashing, and occasional sleep-talking.

I laid down, engulfed in white pillows and sheets, sleepless despite my drowsiness. Anika had knocked out beside me, as still as a corpse in a coffin. All I heard were her steady breaths. How bizarre to be sharing a bed with her now—here in O'ahu of all places—when I'd gotten used to sleeping above Penelope in our juvie bunk for months.

My phone buzzed. I squinted at the bright light, nearly falling off the bed once I saw it.

From Jackass:

are you alright with me coming for new years?

Really? The first time he texted me in what felt like a month, only to ask the obvious?

I texted him back: Why wouldn't I be? I want you to come. How's your arm?

not broken. just twisted.

And what about you?

i feel weird.

Meaning?

i'm not sure.

What are you doing for Christmas? Is your dad still there?

he left to be with his family in germany.

And you're not going with him?

no.

It's complicated having family that lives all over the place, huh.

yes.

What's with the short answers? You're usually more chatty over text.

No response. I visualized it perfectly in my head—him, slouched over his phone, biting his lip as he tried to figure out what to write next. After five minutes, I didn't think he'd reply at all until...

From Jackass:

i've been nervous to talk to you again.

Why?

what's with the questions?

I miss you. Sue me.

There, I said it. And this time, his text came right away, my screen the only light in the dark room.

thanks, böse Blume girl of my nightmares.

I thought I was the brave knight to your helpless prince?

i'm no prince. i'm a helpless commoner. who misses you too, but he's so anxious he's glad you don't have to see it.

I make you anxious?

you make me nervous. i make myself anxious.

Are you upset about what happened on our birthday?

maybe. i need to make sure it was real. i'm wearing a sling around my arm to prove it. but it's not enough.

I went into my camera roll, found the picture Talia took of me earlier on the beach, and cropped it so my cleavage wouldn't show—Jack would have to be here in person to get a look at that. But the citrine necklace was still the focal point, glistening on my neck. Impulsively, I sent the picture to him along with the message: I'm real.

I waited two minutes, my heart doing somersaults in my chest, for his response.

From Jackass:

i don't like being cheesy, but you're beautiful.

That's extremely cheesy, Jack. Are you sure you're not drunk?

just sleepy :)

So you're extra cheesy when you're sleep-deprived?

>:( rude

Upgrading to angry face now? It just looks like it has a unibrow. Why don't you use normal emojis?

From Jackass:

😡

I laughed into my pillow.

I cannot take that seriously.

Then he sent me a voice message. I put the volume all the way down to listen, and I recognized the holy words: "Fahr zur Hölle."

I wanted to save the recording to listen later, engrave it into a vinyl record, but if I listened to it over and over again, maybe it'd lose its charm.

Are you going to send me a picture to go along with that lovely voice message?

And he did. A picture of him. Well, more like the top of his head as he pressed his face against his arm. The same way he always slept in class. And the text below it read:

call me.

??? I can't talk right now.

we don't need to talk.

You just want to go to sleep on the phone?

if that's possible.

Great. Here I was on the verge of combusting into flames again. At least no one else was awake to see this—me giddy and smiling at my phone like a total fool.

You do know Anika is sleeping right next to me.

i'll be quiet 😎

I called him. He picked up on the first ring.

"Guten Abend," he whispered, and it sounded so hilariously ominous I couldn't help but laugh into my pillow.

I'm the one who has to be quiet now? This is torture.

Now he laughed, and I almost wished he'd sent that in the voice message instead.

I'm not going to be able to sleeeeep

I heard sheets rustling from his end—he was probably also laying down on his bed—and then... "I can hang up."

"No!" I said out loud—way too loud—and clasped my hand over my mouth. Shit.

"I have my citrine here," he said, quieter now. "Do you have yours? I'll hold mine. You hold yours. We're connected across time and space and the Pacific Ocean."

"Stop making me laugh," I whispered.

"Are you holding the citrine?" he asked. Out. Loud. I could somehow hear the smile and impending laughter in his voice. Since when was he so comfortable talking to me? Our birthday, turns out, was way more of a milestone than just turning eighteen. But then again... hearing him speak didn't even feel that surprising. He was always his silly, moody self—in his voice, in his texts, in his gestures.

I touched the golden stone. "はい."

Connected across time and space and the Pacific Ocean. Christmas was in four days. Jack and the others would get here in seven. The last time I saw him... snow and cold and wilderness.

I couldn't believe that in a week, he'd be here. 

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A/N: Their first full-length text conversation!! I can't believe it's taken so long. I'm happy for them, although I will say right now I'm leaning more toward Anika's cynical perspective. 

✿ flowers mentioned in this chapter ✿

✿ hawaiian hibiscus ✿

(by the way does anyone here ship Jack and Seth??? or nahh)

(This chapter is dedicated to Bellamyblakesgf who finished this book in less than 16 hours 😱Wow I wonder if anyone's read faster than that..)