I could feel the harsh sunlight directly on my face, making it impossible to go back to sleep. I moved over to my side and threw my arm across my face when I felt soreness on my lower half. I frowned, what happened?

I removed my arm and looked down my myself to see my naked body. I was under the cover's, but I suddenly felt everything. The soreness between my legs, the hickey on my neck that had my blood pounding, the bruises on my hips from Carson's hands that had gripped me from the night before.

Oh my goodness, the night before!

I blushed thinking of everything. I looked over to the side of the bed and saw that my dress as well as my undergarments were still there. Carson was out of the room, the spot beside me now cold. Where had he gone off to?

He usually always left before I was awake. Sometimes, I would hear the bedroom door shutting as he left, but never when he got off the bed. He was always up and about early in the mornings and never rested until late at nights. I guess being the most intimidating mafia boss carried it's job. I was always being watched over by Linia or Silvano, and I never minded, but today was different. I had just slept with Carson. I wasn't sure if I wanted things to change, but I also wasn't expecting him to be the same.

I ignored my wandering mind and pushed myself off the bed. I wasn't going to say anything. If Carson wanted to talk about it, then fine, we would talk about it, but if not, then, fine. I was fine with it, I had to be. I nodded, picking up my clothes from the floor on my way to the bathroom, and started the shower. I wasn't going to overthink it, it was just sex. Besides, we would have plenty of it throughout our marriage, right?

I washed my hair and shaved my body, trying to focus on my shower. I knew myself, and the second I started thinking, the more I would upset myself. It always happened that way. I got out of the shower when I heard thumping on my bathroom door. Quickly reaching for the towel, I wrapped it around my body and neared the door. "Who is it?" I placed my hand on the doorknob, ready to unlock it.

"It's Silvano, I just wanted to let you know that I'm here, so you won't walk out naked." He joked, his voice moving farther away as he probably made himself comfortable in the couch.

I rolled my eyes and proceeded to wrap a towel around my hair and put on some of my clean undergarments. "You wish." I said and I could hear his snort.

"Trust me, I get laid plenty."

I grabbed the moisturizer off the sink and frowned. "How? You're always here." I squirted some onto my palm.

"Trying to get the details, are we?" His voice sounded muffled, but continued speaking. "I'm with one of the strippers here." He stated and I froze, my hands sticking the lotion on my arms. I crunched my eyebrows together.

"There are strippers here?"

"Oh yeah." He mumbled and I neared the door trying to hear what he was saying. "They're here to entertain the guests, and we don't usually interfere with them, but I am dating one, or with one, whatever that means."

I stopped talking and slipped on some shorts and a silky tee shirt that I tucked in while slipping my feet into my Nike shoes once my socks were on. "Does everyone break the rules?" I opened the bathroom door to listen to Silvano clearer. "Like, be with strippers?"

Silvano shrugged and stood up, walking over to me. "Don't know, don't care. Why are you so nosy today?" He leaned against the door frame and I looked down, avoiding his face so he wouldn't see my blush.

I shrugged and pulled out a brush, removing the towel from my hair. "I'm just curious. What are doing today?" I harshly tugged on the knots in my hair. Carson had been careless last night and tangled his hands in it, and in the heat of the moment, I didn't care, but now I did.

"Damn, you trying you to pull your head off." He chuckled, watching as strands of hair clung to my brush from how harsh I was brushing. I ignored him and continued until every memory was gone. Every knot was gone. The knots were gone, not memories, but damn them too. "We're going shooting today." He declared, a smirk on his face as I pulled out my makeup bag.

"Excuse me?" I asked, watching him as he pulled out a black, shiny gun from his pocket.

"Vescovi mentioned that you didn't know how to shoot a gun, and assigned me to teach you. I'm the best of the best, baby." He smiled, his pearly whites shining as I scowled and brushed my foundation on my face. "Don't pull your face out with that brush." He mocked.

"Does he think I don't know how to use one?" I eyed the gun cautiously. He wasn't wrong.

"Well, do you?"

"No," I admitted, applying some concealer. "Where is he?" I blurted. It wasn't wrong to ask. He was going to be my husband anyway.

"Business." He shrugged and picked the gun back up, tucking it onto his waist. "Ready?"

I brushed some powder over my face and grabbed my lip stick. "Where are we practicing?" I followed him out of the room, where an older maid stayed behind to finish placing everything back in their place in the room. I had tried to talking to them, but they never spoke back, always answering curtly. It wasn't until Linia told me that they weren't supposed to speak to me. Apparently, Carson didn't trust me since my last escapade and told everyone to be wary of me.

I walked out to see a bunch of targets around the back of the building. Empty glasses sat on tables, followed by cut out pieces of cardboard in the shape of human bodies. "Get ready to be almost as good as me." Silvano sighed with enjoyment as I took the gun from his hands. It felt heavy and cold. I didn't like it.

"Can't be that hard." I muttered, raising it to point at a glass and fired. What I wasn't expecting was the retaliation from the force, and I quickly let it drop to the floor. As soon as it landed, another gunshot was heard.

"Goddammit!" Silvano bellowed as he quickly bent down to pick it up and mess with it as it clicked. "Lesson number one, do not let it go. Ever." He handed it back to me, and I smiled.

"Sorry, I wasn't expecting it to be that heavy." I blushed and gripped it with both hands.

"Yeah, no kidding." He chuckled, standing behind me and starting explaining a bunch of boring terms. I listened though, knowing that this was something I needed to know if something were to happen, and in this business, something was bound to happen. After countless of tries, I had finally hit a glass bottle. I yelled in joy and tossed my arms up. "Don't let go of the gun!" He raised his voice, his eyes hinting at the slightest bit of fear and I laughed.

"Didn't know that scaring you was this easy." I chuckled, moving my arms back down and feeling the rush travel through my body. "That was exciting, let's go again!" I turned around and raised my hand, aiming at another glass bottle.

"Don't hold it like that." Silvano returned to my side and started lecturing again.

I wasn't sure for how long we were out here for, but I was starting to get tired, and my arms were sore from holding it tightly so it wouldn't slam itself back in my face. Good news was that I had gotten used to it now. I knew how to use it more properly then I had previously, and Silvano was feeling proud of himself for that. Bad news was that since our lesson of the day was over, I was now alone. I was sitting on the couch in the bedroom I shared with Carson, and couldn't help but to think about everything.

I had heard nothing of Carson at all today. I didn't know where he was, or what he was doing, or who he was with. As much as I wanted to deny it, Silvano's comment about strippers had really gotten to me. I couldn't help but wonder if Carson had one, or worse, had more than one waiting for him. I could still hear his comment that he had made earlier on during my time with him.

"I don't want anything to do with you, let's make that clear."

Those were the first words he said to me when we first started sharing a bed together, and then we slept together a few weeks later. Did he say that to me because he already had other women at his disposition? Is that why he wasn't interested in me at first? Hell, was he even interested in me now? Was it a one-time thing only?

I groaned loudly and covered my face with my hands. I had always sucked at relationships, only this time, I wasn't just screwed, I was fucked. I had no idea what to do. I needed to know that someone was going to protect me, and Carson was going to do that. I needed someone to help me understand what exactly was going on around me, and Carson was doing that. I needed someone to care about me and show me assurance, and Carson wasn't doing that. Carson was dangerous, he was uncertainty.

He was the smoke that was burning my lungs and ruining me, but I couldn't stop breathing in because I needed air. I was becoming intoxicated here, but I couldn't leave. Not now, not ever.