After school was over Yami said he had something to do before I could come over for the party. He kissed my cheek and headed out before I could ask what he was doing. 'Probably just party preparations.' I walked home and entered the game shop to find grandpa sweeping.

"Hey gramps, how is it going?" I smiled sweetly at him and for the first time in a long while, it was a genuine smile.

"Fine." He had a blank look and his face. When he mets my eyes I saw sadness inside them. My eyebrows raised at the inner corners as I stepped closer to him.

"Are you okay? You seem..." I trailed off staring at him. He took a deep breath and exhaled.

"Well it's just you haven't been home much lately and I still haven't met this boyfriend of yours who you've been spending most of your time with." I felt my face get hot at his words, but cooled down as I felt a sense of guilt. Grandpa must be lonely with me not here.

"I-. I'm sorry. How about he comes over tomorrow for dinner?" His face lit up as he smiled his usual smile.

"That would be splendid!" He chuckled. "Also how would you like to come with me to get that phone of yours fixed?" Now my face lit up. Not only was my phone getting fixed, but it'll make time go faster so I can see Yami. The electronics store was only a couple of blocks away so we had just walked, even though I argued with him saying he shouldn't strain himself. "I'm old Yugi! Not dead!" I sighed and gave into him. At least I was with him so if anything happened he wouldn't be alone. We arrived at the phone store and were greeted by a man behind the desk. Gramps explained about the crack and that it should be covered under warranty. The man said he would just be one moment while he looked up our file on his computer. I walked over to a glass case that contained all of the newest and coolest phones. I gawked at them for a bit before I heard the man and gramps talking.

"Yes, it is covered under warranty, but you're eligible for an upgrade. It wouldn't cost you anything, is that something you'd be interested in?" I felt myself almost dash to the counter with excitement. My current phone wasn't terrible, it got the job done, but it was an old flip phone that Joey always made fun of me for having. Gramps chuckled at me.

"Would you like to upgrade Yugi?" He smiled at me and I nodded my head in response. The man smiled and lead me over the glass case I was previously looking at.

"You can pick from any of these except for the two plus sized ones at the back." I had already made my choice. I pointed to a white touch screen phone with gold trimming.

"That one please!" He smiled as he went into the back of the store returning with a white box. The man explained to me that I would have to renter all of my information because my other phone was to old and didn't have a SIM card to transfer. I didn't mind at all. My old phone didn't really have anything important on it. "Can I just look at one number on my other phone?" Grandpa grinned at me slyly as I avoided his gaze feeling my cheeks go scarlet. He snickered as the man handed my old phone. I punched in Yami's number and decided I may as well put Tristan's and Joey's in as well. When I came across Anzu's name I halted, but decided to put in my phone regardless if she ever wanted to speak to me again. I never wanted to see another unknown number. We thanked the man as we left the store I jumped on gramps hugging him tightly. "Thank you so much Grandpa! I'm so grateful!" He chuckled at me returning the hug.

"I didn't pay for anything, but your welcome." He winked at me and we returned to the game shop.

After a couple of hours of texting on my new phone and going through outfits for the night I stood in front of the mirror having a newfound confidence that I never thought I would have. I took the eyeliner out of my dresser and heavily lined my eyeballs and decided to go all out and gave my self cat eyes. Yami was changing me. He filled the void inside my heart which lost its light after my parents died, or should I say murdered. I cringed at the memory of my mothers lifeless body on top of me. I felt tears prickle my eyes and I breathed heavy. I was not ruining my eyeliner after it looked so damn perfect. I grabbed my phone distracting myself and noticed that I sent Yami a text when I got home but he had yet to reply. I told myself he was busy, but my mind started to worry. After awhile of battling with my thoughts I decided to call him. It rang a couple times before he answered.

"Yes?" He voice was stern and quick.

"Hey, it's Yugi, I got a new phone and number. I texted you but you never responded. Is everything alright?" His tone completely softened.

"Sorry, I've been dealing with..." He trailed off. I didn't say anything hoping he would finish. "I've just been busy. I'll wrap things up here and come pick you up." He sounded kind of panicked. Like leaving in the middle of whatever he was doing was a bad idea, but didn't want to worry me. I didn't pry. I said he could tell me when he was comfortable.

"Actually you don't have to come pick me up. I have to help gramps with the shop for a bit anyway. I can walk by myself." I could hear the struggle in his breath. He wanted to argue, but whatever he was dealing with must have been important. "I'll see you at 8." There was a long pause. I couldn't control the disappointment I had when he didn't respond. I moved the speaker from my ear.

"Wait Yugi!" I felt a sense of relief. He paused again. "See you at 8."click. I felt a sharp pain in my chest. What could Yami be hiding that he couldn't tell me? Did he not trust me? My head started to hurt, my thoughts uncontrollable racing around in circles. 'Am I not good enough?' My breathing became rapid. 'Please. Not now.' It was to late, my anxiety went into overdrive and I dealt with it the only way I knew how. Like a reoccurring dream or déjà vu, I opened the third drawer in my dresser and took out the razor blade, journal and cloth. I hated myself for being so weak. I pulled up my sleeve and put the razor to my skin. I was shaking trying to tell myself to stop, that this wouldn't stop the pain. I struggled and fought with myself before I gave in slicing opening my arm for every emotion I couldn't deal with. 'Worry'. Cut. 'Fear' slice. 'Anxiety'. Gash. 'Sadness'. Tear. 'Loneliness'. This one hurt the most. I did my deepest laceration and dropped the razor letting my blood drip onto an open page of my journal before smothering them with the cloth. I stared at my journal. The blood wrote more than a pen ever could. I needed to remember to not take off my jacket tonight. After an hour of calming down and deeply breathing I cleaned up my room and left the game shop. 'It's warm out tonight'.

I walked up the steep driveway when someone put me in a head lock making me flail hysterically. I elbowed them in the stomach hard and they released me. I turned around so fast I almost lost my balance. My goofy blonde haired friend was holding his side coughing. Relief washed through my body.

"Sorry Joey!" I walked over to him making sure he was okay.

"Jesus Yug' it was like holding on to a fish. Your stronger than I thought." I giggled patting him on the back apologetically. We headed into the house going to the backyard were we found Duke, Maya and Tristan playing some sort of drinking game. They were all pretty drunk.

"Hey guys! So happy you could make it again Yugi!" Maya smiled with her face red from drinking.

"What about me!?" Joey put his hand over his chest giving Maya a shocked look. She gave him the thumbs up smiling with her mouth open before quickly turning her thumb down and letting out a raspberry. We all laughed while Joey slumped over to the table.

"Where's Yami?" I had already done this last week. I already asked where he was and found him passed out on the floor upstairs. I prayed inwardly that I didn't have to see him like that again.

"He was just here. He said he would be right back." Maya answered as she pulled up a chair for me to sit at the table with. "Okay so this game is really fun, fast and gets you drunk quick." I giggled as she slurred her words proving her point for her. "It's called Rhyme Time. One person starts with a word then we go around rhyming until someone can't think of one or repeats a previous one. Why don't you start us off Yugi?." I nodded. It would start with me, Maya, Duke, Tristan, and then Joey.

"Game"

"Lame"

"Fame"

"Shame"

"Dame"

I stuttered for a second and Maya snapped her fingers. "Also if you stutter you have to take a shot! What kind of liquor do you want?" I laughed and shrugged at her. She grabbed a black bottle of brown liquid and poured it into the glass and handed it to me. "It's whiskey." I took it fast as my face convulsed at the taste. Maya snickered at me. "Don't worry the more you drink the less you'll notice the taste. It's my turn now."

Maya - "Duck"

Duke - "Luck"

Tristan - "Muck"

Joey - "Truck"

Me - "Suck"

Maya - "Buck"

Duke - "Struck"

Tristan - "Fuck"

"Fuck. FUCK!" We burst out into laughter as Joey poured himself a shot. We continued a couple more rounds of the game until I felt pretty drunk. I pulled out my phone and texted Yami.

Where are you? :(

I waited for a couple of minutes and when he didn't respond I went to go look for him. "I'll be right back guys." They waved at me as I headed up four flights of stairs skipping looking for him on the second and third. I had a pretty good idea where he was. I entered the room where all of the biker looking people resided. I searched around for Yami checking the bathrooms for him. 'Where is he?' As I passed the table where two guys and a girl were doing cocaine one of them grabbed my shoulder.

"Wanna try some? It'll make you feel good." Normally I would have politely said no, but I was pretty drunk and Yami was no where to be found. I shrugged as I sank down to my knees. The man handed me a straw and a tray that had neatly laid out lines of white powder. I stuck the straw in my nose and leaned down. A strong hand pulled me back and I flailed the straw onto the table. I was ripped up from the ground turning to see Yami piercing daggers with his eyes at the man. The man curled back into the couch as I was pulled out of the room.

"You are not to come up here again." His face was cold and frightening. I was scared but also angry.

"I came to look for you because you never respond to my texts." The words came out more coldly than I had expected. A flash of guilt crossed his face and then hardened again.

"You can't be up here it's." He paused. "Dangerous. I never want to see you do that stuff." I felt my eyes narrow and then I said something I probably shouldn't have.

"Well, aren't you one to talk." I spoke with an attitude in my voice I didn't even know I had. I instantly regretted it. Yami's eyes widened as he pushed me away from him. 'Why did I make him angry. That was stupid.' I went to apologize, but his back was already turned to me walking back into the room. I tried to follow him but someone stopped me at the door clearly listening to our conversation. His hands were on both sides of the door frame blocking me. I huffed as I turned and went to the kitchen. I walked up to the sliding glass door and saw that Anzu was standing with my other friends. I glared at her and thought 'nope'. I did not want to talk about today's earlier events especially being this drunk. I returned to the island and took a few more shots.

"Whoa, slow down there short stuff. Don't wanna kill yourself do you?" Kill yourself. That comment made my face convulse harder than the liquor did. I turned to see two very drunk guys smiling at me.

"Fuck off." I said before walking towards the dance floor. I heard the other guy laughing at his friend. I danced to the music moving in between the sea of bodies around me until I floated into a group of people failing around. A girl put a cup into my hand mouthing the word drink. So I did and handed her the cup. When I felt that I had sweat enough from dancing I made my way back to the island feeling more dizzy then before. I took a few more shots not realizing how drunk I really was, though I didn't really care at this point. I didn't want to think anymore. I stared at the tile floor in the kitchen realizing the patterns were moving below me forming into new shapes and sizes. I looked up and glanced around the room. I was hallucinating. Something must have been in that drink that was not liquor. I thought back to health class when we were learning about drugs. I went through a list of hallucinogens and symptoms before concluding that it must have been some form of LSD. I couldn't control my smile. Everything just felt so great. I rubbed my hands on the island for ten minutes.

"Yugi?" I looked up to see Maya standing in front of me. Her face became warped and swirled into something else entirely. I couldn't help but giggle uncontrollably at it. "How much have you drank? You seem pretty happy." She was slurring and barely able to hold herself up. I couldn't even respond I just kept laughing. She gave me a strange look before taking a shot and going back outside. I went back to the crowded floor of people jumping in between them. This was even more fun now. I failed around until I realized someone had pulled me very close and was grinding with me. I was so incoherent that I couldn't tell if it was a male or female, but I just kept dancing regardless. After awhile I drifted away from my mystery dance partner and went outside I sat on the grass rubbing my hands through the blades gripping onto it giggling. Something abruptly pushed me down. I continued to giggle as I ran my hands on there body soaking in the feelings I was receiving just from the sensation of touch. My eyes snapped open when they started to take off my jacket.

"No." Was all I could manage to mumble out. I tried my best to focus on the person above me. It was my mysterious dance partner. "Stop." I wasn't making sense. I was trying to speak but I couldn't form any words. I felt his face and breath on my neck. I shivered and gripped onto the grass.

"YUGI!" The voice is so familiar, but I can't remember who it belongs to. "What the fuck are you doing!?"  I felt the body on top of me thrown off while a new hand touched my face. I giggled as I ran my fingers over it continuing up there arm. I opened my eyes and saw Yami staring at me. I just smiled at him reaching up to touch his face. He shot up and jumped over me. I heard crashing behind me as I sat up. Yami was punching the very drunk, possibly high, mystery man. Suddenly I snapped back into reality and ran over to them. The man was not fighting back with cuts on his forehead bleeding down his face. He also was bleeding from his mouth. I finally registered that Yami was still punching him and I grabbed his arm trying to stop him. His arm flailed back cracking me in the side of the nose. I stumbled back and fell back into a bush. I reached up to my face wincing at the pain as I opened my hand in front of me to see it covered in blood. I didn't have time to stand up before Yami was over top of me covering his mouth. I could see the tears in his eyes. He pulled me from the ground as I stumbled everywhere. I could not stop laughing. I tripped over the bush crashing into the ground as I started to lose consciousness I could hear Yami repeating the same thing.

"Yugi! I'm so sorry!"