TWENTY

''Careful how you play your cards when you have a queen in your hands.' - Unknown

I've never been good at making choices – especially when it comes to food and the platter in front of us is extraordinary. A stuffed turkey sits in front of me, dressed at the bottom with all the trimmings you'd find in a typical roast dinner. There's a smell of garlic salmon to my right and I watch as one of the girls takes a piece of steak from a hot plate the butler brings to her. I reach for the gravy and pour it over my mountain of food until the plate is swimming in it.

"I have no idea what that is but are your potatoes supposed to be floating?"

Amberley sits across from me but I can barely make her out over the large bird resting between us. I can just about see her dressed in a navy blue dress, her hair pinned and styled into a low bun that sits on her shoulders. The dining room is massive for our small table of guests, but the array of food seems to have made up for the gaping space that surrounds us.

I hide my smile and look down at my plate. "You've not had gravy before?"

"I'm sure I've had it, we must call it something else – back at home I mean, everything is different here."

"I can imagine,"

"The girls have been talking," Amberley makes conversation, glancing to the right of her. Henna sits beside her but hasn't so much as spared her a glance all evening. I can tell from the way Amberley looks at her that it bothers her more than it should.

"About what?" I ask, shoving the floating potato into my mouth.

"What we are doing here,"

"I've been wondering the same thing," I tell her truthfully.

"I heard it's something to do with showing how we could manage staff," Sophia interrupts, placing her cutlery down onto her plate on Amberley's right.

Amberley shifts in her seat, almost as if the idea makes her uncomfortable, "oh?"

"I heard we're visiting a children's ward not far from here," Henna turns to face us, her blonde eyebrow-raising at the mountain of food on my plate compared to the measly carrot and broccoli mix she has got on hers. I can't help but ponder the real reason she's a bitch is due to the lack of protein in her diet. A piece of turkey might gain her a personality trait.

"Oh, I love kids!" Sophia squeals.

I have no idea where any of the girls hear any of this stuff, but I mull over her words. "What hospital?"

Henna stabs her fork into her carrot, "I suppose we will have to find out, won't we, Princess?" she draws her fork to her mouth and bites down on her carrot with a smirk.

Lord tell me why does she feel as if she needs to turn everything into a snarky remark?

Amberley's mouth opens as if to speak when the door bursts open and Rubella comes strutting into the room, a man behind her carrying what appears to be a projector. The room falls silent as we watch Rubella walk to the head of the table and place her iPad on the surface. The man behind her begins to set up a projector and it flickers to life shortly afterwards.

"Evening, ladies. I hope your meal has found you well."

There is a murmur across the room and we all subtly shift in our seats to see what appears on the projector.

"I am thrilled to be able to tell you what your next task is," Rubella presses something on her iPad and the slide changes.

HOW WILL YOU RULE?

Is printed in massive black letters across the screen.

"As you know, marriage to Prince James not only will make you his wife, but also his queen when he ascends the throne. Your task is to present a detailed demonstration answering the afore question. How will you rule? This presentation will be shown in front of Prince James himself and his mother Queen Katherine. They are to be no longer than fifteen minutes each and are to be as creative as possible. The title of this presentation should be If I were Queen. Any questions?"

"What does it have to include?" Henna calls out.

Rubella smiles. "Nothing."

"I beg your pardon?"

"If you have to ask the question, should you really be here at all, Lady Henna?"

I suppress the smile that etches at my lip and I swear I feel Rubella's eyes scan the table and fall on me. I could almost kiss her for the look on Henna's face is picture worthy.

"You will be presenting on Friday." Rubella finishes.

I turn back in my seat and Amberley meets my eyes looking amused. "Wow," she says. "Homework."

*

I wake to the sound of heavy breathing.

My eyes snap open to the sound but I don't dare move. I strain my ears for the sound – any kind of sound to show I'm not being mental, and someone is really inside my bedroom.

"Shit," I hear someone whisper and I shoot myself upright and whirl to see a figure looming beside the doorway, rubbing their hip.

"What the fuck—"

"Eva, shit, it's me."

"Henry?"

I don't even allow him a chance to answer before I catapult myself from my duvet and into his arms. I don't dare take another breath until I feel his arms wrap around my middle and pull me closer to him. His smell and the collar of his shirt rubbing against my cheek is enough for me to believe he is real. Real and really standing here – in Windsor Castle.

"Jesus fucking Christ," I whisper as he stands me back down. I'm flat on my feet but I feel as if the wind has been knocked out of me. "You scared the hell out of me."

"I'm sorry," Henry's right-hand lifts and he cups my cheek. "I had to see you."

My eyes soften and I take his hand. "They wouldn't let me come—they..."

"I know, Eva."

"How are you?" I ask him, pulling him out from the doorway and into the small patch of moonlight that floods from my open curtains.

"I'm fine,"

"Fine? You don't have to pretend Henry, they tried to pin a murder charge on you."

"But they didn't," Henry's hands rub circles over my bare arms and try to not notice the way goosebumps appear under his touch. "What James did..."

"I know," is all I can say.

"He's got a good heart, a bad temper yes, but a good heart. I don't know how to repay him."

"He cares about you," I bite down on my bottom lip. "We both do."

Henry's eyes bore into me and I stand still, transfixed with the idea that he is here and trail my eyes down his body as if trying to memorise him.

"God, I've missed you," he whispers, his thumb traces the shape of my mouth and my heart lurches in my chest. "I was sure I was going to be kicked off his detail, that I wouldn't see you again."

I must look at him questioningly because Henry says, "James fought for me to remain his head of security. I owe the man my life and it is me who is supposed to be protecting him. Ironic, really, isn't it?"

"Henry,"

"I can't stay long," he drops his hand and runs it through his hair. "We've just arrived, and I've got to secure the wing."

"Right," I murmur. Of course, if Henry's here James is too.

"But tomorrow, I will find you. I don't think I can keep staying away from you, Eva Windsor."

His words make me freeze as my mind darts back to the last time someone said something similar like that to me and I feel as if I'm having the same conversation I had with Luke a year earlier.

It's those words that sober me up, like a cold bottle of water has shaken me awake and I have the sudden urge to run, to push him out the door and crawl back up into bed and pretend what is happening between us does not exist because this can't happen. He can't get close any more than I have let him. He isn't only a member of staff but an Australian one at that. Someone who resides almost ten thousand miles away. Someone whose main priority is to protect the next king of Australia. Someone who will be gone once James has chosen a wife.

"Henry...I..."

"I think you don't feel like you deserve it, Eva,"

"Deserve what?" but the words are barely a whisper because nothing scares me more at this moment than what he is about to say.

"Love, real love. I think you try to ruin it."

And maybe because he's right or maybe because I'm so caught up within the moment of seeing him, but I reach up on my tiptoes and drag his mouth towards mine and I kiss him. I kiss him like he's air and I'm dying to breathe and for one moment I think what he said could be true. Maybe I do deserve the kind of love I want to have. Maybe I do deserve this. Because if there is one thing I am sure of, I want it.