[Chapter thirty-one]

"Y-You're leaving?" Megan stutters.

"Your mom's going to rehab?" Max bites his lip.

"Your mom's abusive?" Dylan clenches his fist.

"YOU'RE LEAVING?!" Megan shouts, standing up from my couch. "Y-You're my best friend. You can't leave. Who am I supposed to stay up until two in the morning and fangirl over Dave Franco with? Or rant about stupid boys while eating ice cream with?"

"Well, you can always make Dylan and Max sit through the torture." I smile weakly. I'm not wearing my hood. What's the point? They all know what I look like.

Megan let's a little laugh slip as Dylan and Max start protesting.

"Wait, does Noah know you're leaving? Never mind the fact that you're leaving, does he know that you have, you know...cancer?" Max questions, trailing off quietly at the last word.

I bite my lip, giving him an answer.

"Noah doesn't know?!" Dylan exclaims, his mouth dropping open in shock.

"Nevaeh!" Megan's mouth also drops open.

"I didn't know how to tell him!" I snap. "You wouldn't understand..."

"How do you know we wouldn't understand?" Dylan asks.

"You just wouldn't." I mumble.

"How are we supposed to understand if you won't tell us?" He asks again.

"You just wouldn't." I repeat, firmer than before.

"Then make us understand!" Dylan pushes, standing up.

"Because I'm in love with him!" I yell. Dylan steps back with a satisfied look on his face.

Max jumps up, fist bumping the air. "I KNEW IT!"

"I'm in love with him and he's going to hate me." I whisper.

Megan steps forward, wrapping her arms around me. "Vaeh, he's not going to hate you. He may be a little angry with you at first for not telling him sooner, but he could never hate you."

"Yeah, he's head over heels for you." Max chips in, shrugging. "He looks at you the way Dean Winchester looks at pie."

Dylan, Megan and I all stare at Max.

"What?" He questions cluelessly.

*~*

"Honey, if you ever need anything, I'm only a plane ride away." Tanya tells me, hugging me tightly. "Seriously, if you need me, I'll be on the next flight to New Zealand."

"Thank you, Mrs Ki—Tanya." I smile sheepishly as I hug her back. "For everything."

"Thank you for trusting me."

"Vaeh?"

Tanya and I break away as Danny's voice floats through the room.

"Hey, little man." I give him a small smile, kneeling down.

"What's going on?" He questions, walking over to me.

I bite my lip.

This is why I don't get close to people.

The less people you have, the less it hurts to say goodbye.

"Uh, I'm going back to New Zealand."

"For how long?" He asks, furrowing his eyebrows.

I sigh. "I don't know."

"You don't know?" He repeats in confusion. "Aren't you just going on vacation?"

Dammit. This just keeps getting harder and harder.

"No, Danny, I, um, I have to go live there." I tell him.

"Why?" His lower lip wobbles.

"Because..." What do I say?! "I'm sick, kid. And I don't know when I'm going to get better."

I'm not going to get better.

"Do you have a cold?" Danny questions, eyebrows furrowed. "Because we have Mucinex."

"Thanks, Danny, but it's not that simple." I sigh before pulling him to me and hugging him tightly.

"I love you, Vaeh." He wraps his arms around my neck.

"I love you, too, short stuff." I mumble.

*~*

"You sure you want to see her?" Aunty Mila questions as we stand outside the rehabilitation centre.

"No." I mutter. "But I need to say goodbye."

She nods as we walk in and one of the workers take us to the visiting room.

"She's already in there. You have twenty minutes." The worker tells us before walking away.

"You coming?" I ask Aunty Mila as we stop outside the door.

"Yeah, nah," she starts. "I'm afraid I'll punch her in the face."

I chuckle a bit before taking a breath and putting my hand on the door knob.

Aunty Mila gives me an encouraging smile and pats my shoulder.

I twist the handle and step in.

I see my mum sitting at the table with her back turned to the door.

I walk over and sit opposite her.

She doesn't look up at me.

"Uh, I just wanted to say goodbye. I'm going back to New Zealand tonight with Aunty Mila—"

"What?!" Mum exclaims, looking up. "You can't go back to New Zealand with her!"

"And why not?"

"Can't you see?!" She yells. "She's stealing you away from me! She put me in this place so she could have you all to herself! She's not going to be a better mum than me. I was a great mother to you—"

"Great mother?" I laugh humourlessly, cutting her off as I stand up abruptly, knocking the chair over. "Great mother? You were a terrible mother!"

Her eyes narrow. "You listen to me, young lady—"

"No, you listen to me!" I shout. "We put you in here because you need help! Ever since Heaven died, all you've been doing is getting drunk and stoned! You've given me so many burns and scars yet I still loved you!"

"I—"

"You see this?" I lift my hoodie, along with my T-shirt to show the large scar going from my shoulder to my abdomen. "You gave this to me."

She shakes her head as I pull my shirt and hoodie back down. "N-No, I didn't."

"I was fifteen." I carry on, ignoring her. "You broke a whiskey bottle and cut me with the biggest piece of glass."

She keeps shaking her head. "No, n-no,"

"I have to live with this for the rest of my life!" I shout, making her shut up as I point to where the scar is. "Every time I see it, all I can think is 'my mother doesn't love me'."

She starts to protest. "No, I do—"

"Burning and cutting me is one thing, but you know what hurts the most?" I start with watery eyes. "I loved you through all the shit you put me through and you had the balls to turn around and say that I SHOULD HAVE DIED! So don't you feed me your bullshit and try to tell me that you were a good mother because YOU WEREN'T,"

She opens her mouth but no words come out as tears start streaming down both of our faces.

"And guess what, mother?" I spit the word like it's poison. "You got your wish. I'm dying. I have cancer."

"W-What? N-No," she starts sobbing.

"I found out the day you cut me me with that glass." I admit through gritted teeth.

"I'm sorry!" She sobs loudly. "I'm so, so sorry!"

I walk over to the door and put my hand on the knob, but I turn around before I open it and say one last thing.

"See you in hell."

*~*

I bite my lip and knock on the door as I fiddle with the envelope in my hand.

"Vaeh?" Tanya opens the door. "Honey, isn't your flight in an hour?"

"Yeah, I just, I never said goodbye to Noah, and I..." I rush out, trailing off.

"Sweetheart, Noah's not here at the moment-"

"I'm not looking for Noah." I cut her off, looking anywhere but her. "Is Danny there?"

"Yeah, hold on." She gives me a confused look before disappearing down the hall while calling Danny's name.

"Vaeh?" Danny runs over and hugs me when I kneel down.

"Hi, Danny, look I can't stay long." I pull away from him. "Can you do me a favour?"

"Of course." He nods. "Anything for you."

I smile sadly, ruffling his hair, before handing him the envelope with Noah's name scrawled neatly across the front in cursive letters.

"Give this to Noah for me, please."

He furrows his eyebrows as he takes it from me. "Okay, but why don't you just give it to him yourself?"

I shake my head. "I can't."

"Why not?" He asks.

"I just can't, Danny." I tell him, making him nod. "I have to go."

I bend down and kiss the top of his head.

"Bye, Vaeh." He quickly hugs me as I turn around and start to walk away.

I stop and turn around before I get off the front porch.

"Danny, tell your brother he was right."

{END OF PART 1}