t w e n t y - t h r e e

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'cause we are good for each other
and this will pass like the w e a t h e r . . .

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Ever since Koa popped the question and Sutton went from devoted girlfriend to possessed fiancé, I never thought I'd see the light at the end of the tunnel. My sister sucked up any and all luminosity in my life and suddenly, I became a blind servant. Lost and stumbling around in the dark, obeying echoed commands, reaching for a sense of freedom I wasn't even sure existed anymore.

After the phone call that promoted me to Maid of Honor, the next two and a half weeks went by faster than any other time I had experienced before. Now, the wedding was staring me in the face and it was like looking into the sun. Blinding me until I saw nothing but crystal blue water, a smiling couple, scripted vows on a sheet of paper, and a four-tiered cake.

I couldn't have gotten out of work fast enough on my last day before my vacation started. That was a stretch of a description, but I had to keep up the charade until my sister said "I do".

On that Friday, I'd had enough. I was at the point where I couldn't really care about anything other than landing in Hawaii in one piece. I'd be out of the office for a week, away from fashion traumas and wrinkled fabrics and unannounced phone calls from my boss who was still in Milan.

"Okay, listen." I stepped up to Nadia's desk, which was currently occupied by a nineteen-year-old intern that was hired to take her place while she was with Donatella in Italy.

Her name was Chelsea. She had silky ombré hair that was always in loose waves like she actually woke up early enough to use a curling iron, and her hand was never seen without clenching a reusable Starbucks cup filled with something hazelnut flavored. She went to my alma mater, Drexel University, had the same major as myself, and was in the same sorority as one of my good friend's from college. This didn't necessarily mean I liked her, but she was probably one of the more tolerable interns Donatella had chosen.

Chelsea looked up at me from her computer screen, brown doe-eyes blinking in anticipation.

"I know I said all of this to you before, but I'm relaying the message because I need you to remember it," I started off, resting my hands on the edge of the desk and bending down so our faces were at the same height. "I will be away starting tomorrow for the next nine days. You can text or call me if you have an emergency, but hopefully that won't happen. Angeline is taking my spot while I'm gone so you can go to her with any questions. Got it?"

She nodded. "Yup."

"Don't answer any calls from Donatella. Just transfer them over to Angeline. There's never really been a time where Donatella, Nadia, and myself have all been out of the office at once, so try to hold the fort down as best you can. If we come back to a mess, it's my head on the chopping block," I explained, to which she nodded her head vigorously again. I wasn't trying to intimidate her, but I wanted to ensure she understood how important this was that DiNardo Designs was still up and running by the time all three of us came back from our trips. "If you need anything, let me know. But no offense, try not to need me."

"None taken."

I made sure to answer any other questions she may have had for the time being, then I gathered up my things and booked it out of there only to sit in traffic for forty minutes. It gave me an agonizing preview of what the following morning would be like with a dozen of us all traveling to the airport at the same time to board our eight o'clock flight. The idea alone gave me a headache.

When I walked through the front door of Collin's place, he and Ziggy were lounging on the couch in the living room. Only one of them got up to greet me.

"Yo," Collin said upon noticing me.

"Hey." I leaned down to scratch behind one of Ziggy's ears as I nodded at Collin. "Let me just take him around the block real quick and then we can go," I lowered my voice so my dog wouldn't get too riled up at the subtle mention of a walk.

"Already did that," Collin said, and I sent him a small, thankful smile. He closed his laptop and put it aside to stand up, taking a moment to stretch his arms. "I still don't think we should be going out considering you have to finish packing, but whatever."

"Hey, that's Morning Bayla's problem," I defended myself with narrowed eyes. "Right now, I just want to start my drinking binge because the fact that I potentially have to get on a plane with my ex-boyfriend and my entire family tomorrow makes me want to straight up die."

Collin held both his hands up in surrender and grimaced. "Okay, point made."

My life was becoming a sitcom, truly.

From what I had gathered through a game of whisper down the lane with Asher, my mother had been in contact with Mrs. Monahan, multiple times. Out of everyone, they were mourning mine and Gus' breakup the most, but they always had a pretty strong bond. For that, I was thankful our families got along.

Anyway, the two had a handful of conversations on what to do regarding the wedding. To come, or not to come. If it were up to me, I wouldn't even be going at this rate. Because my sister and my mom were in cahoots – like mother like daughter – they had persuaded the Monahan's to join us. Without further consideration of my relationship status, of where Gus and I stood in terms of speaking or even remaining in the same room together, and of any sort of feelings I had on the situation, they made this decision.

It was like a bad dream. I wanted to scream and yet I couldn't find a voice to do so. I was trying to run from my problems with lead feet. I was falling, falling, falling until I'd jolt awake before breaking ground. All I could do was sit back and watch as my life burst into flames before my eyes.

My immediate family including the bride and groom, both sets of my grandparents, and apparently Gus, were all boarding Flight 361 out of Philly to Honolulu at 8:15 tomorrow morning. We had to arrive at the airport by six, since we had a million people to check in and get through security and my grandparents couldn't maneuver around like they used to, which meant I had to wake up at something like four AM to finish packing. Again, Morning Bayla's problem.

The rest of our extended family, friends, and so on were flying in throughout next week. Since the ceremony wasn't until the following Friday, that gave my family and I some time to relax before the stress really kicked in. We would have a few days to spend in Hawaii like a real vacation until everyone else showed up to kickstart the wedding. Collin was one of the few people coming later next week, since his budget and schedule only allowed him for a short trip, and I was almost debating on having him and Gus switch places. I knew it wouldn't work, but I was thinking up any way I could to save myself from losing my mind on this trip.

A week in Hawaii with my family and my ex-boyfriend. How could it get any better than that?

"I'm gonna pee and grab my other purse real quick. Call the Uber in the meantime?" I suggested as I started to make my way towards the stairs, dashing up them once Collin nodded.

I was out of breath once I reached the third floor, my body still not used to that hike up to my bedroom. Having been accustomed to a brief elevator ride and short walk down a hallway to my apartment, I never realized how out of shape I was.

After coming out of the bathroom, I stood in front of the long mirror attached to the back of the door and took in my reflection. I hardly recognized myself. My hair that hadn't been touched up in six months was trimmed and highlighted to a bright, whiteish blonde, changing my whole appearance. I was so used to my dull sandy roots that were about three inches long and blended into the highlights from my last appointment. Sutton insisted earlier this week we all get our hair freshened up for the wedding, and I couldn't deny I really needed it.

My nails that were given no attention for about as long as my hair were now filed, moisturized, and coated in a creamy neutral color, as of last night per Sutton's request. The facial I'd gotten a few days ago made my skin glow underneath the minimal makeup I had put on before work this morning. All that remained the same was my ensemble – my second skin of a leather jacket, black skinny jeans, and ankle booties.

I didn't recognize myself, but maybe for once that was a good thing.

I took my phone and wallet out of my work tote where I'd thrown it on the floor, next to my sloppily half-packed suitcase. Everything, from a dozen bikinis to emergency tampons, was surrounding it, reminding me that Collin was right and I definitely should finish packing. Instead, I opted for rushing around in the morning so I could have one last celebration tonight. Priorities.

When I came parading down the two flights of stairs, Collin was already waiting in the entryway. One hand was typing on his phone, the other was pulling the door open for me.

He stepped aside and glanced up at me to say, "Uber's here. Jax'll be home any minute now to hang with Zig."

"I can't believe I'm leaving my dog with you two while I'm away," I groaned, shaking my head.

"Well who else is gonna watch him? Your whole family is going to this wedding, even me."

I slid into our Uber's car first, my eyes latching onto the driver's phone that was fastened to the dashboard to make sure we were going to the correct location. We exchanged hello's, and I waited until Collin was in the backseat with me to continue our conversation.

"I know, but that's my child," I enunciated, as if it wasn't obvious. "I trust you guys, I do, but he's literally the light of my life. If anything happens to him, especially when I'm not there, I don't think I'd be able to go on. You think you've seen the worst of me after the breakup? Imagine that times like, a million."

"He'll be fine. He needs some more guy bonding anyway," Collin scoffed with a dismissive wave. I just rolled my eyes.

The car ride was only a few minutes, just to the other side of town where the main strip appropriately named Main Street was that housed a number of breweries, bars, restaurants, and shops. Now that this was my temporary new neighborhood, I wanted to see some of the nightlife in the area. Neither of us had been to the place we were on our way to before, but when Collin and I were together it was bound to be a good time no matter where we were or what we were doing.

It was a convenience-store-turned-brewery that had been under construction for the last year or so. Apparently, it was the "hottest new spot to be seen at" according to the locals. It was a shocker that we weren't going to Cruiser's for our weekly dinner date since we missed it this week. We hadn't been there in over a month and we were definitely missing their shoestring fries and strong cocktails, but trekking back to my old stomping grounds post breakup was a treacherous idea I wanted no part of.

The car stopped at the lively corner where the brewery was located and there were people scattered around the entire intersection. Even though it was a bone-chilling temperature outside, that didn't seem to deter anyone. Then again, they were likely buzzing with alcohol which could be the only thing to make the weather a little more bearable.

We managed to snag two seats next to each other at the bar when we got inside, between an older couple and a small group of guys that seemed about our age. I chose to sit beside the woman to avoid any unwanted male attention that wasn't Collin or the bartender.

It was truly my first night out on a weekend in the wake of my relationship. Not for dinner, not for my sister; solely for drinks and a good time. I had pretty much been cooped up at home for the most part since then, so playing the role of a single girl at a bar on a Friday night was foreign to me. I didn't know what to do with myself.

I was too lost in the myriad of liquor bottles against the back wall of the bar to notice one of the bartenders had finally made his way over to us. Not an inch of bronze skin from his biceps to his fingertips was free of ink, his black hair deserved a comb-through or two, and his green gaze stood out against the dim lighting.

He definitely fit the mold of hot bartender, yet I didn't feel a damn thing.

"Two Old Fashioned's, and two shots of honey Jim Beam," Collin shouted over the raucous conversations going on all around us. The bartender nodded once, and when he disappeared to make our order, Collin turned to me. "First round's on me."

"Collin, you have to stop saving my ass," I chuckled.

He shrugged. "Buy the next round and we'll call it even."

"You're too much!" I playfully shoved his arm.

He grinned as he handed over his card to the bartender when he returned with our drinks.

"Only for you."

We both grabbed the shot glasses first, clinking them together without a word before throwing our heads back and downing the sweet whiskey.

It didn't take long at all for us to polish off our first round of drinks before we ordered another, along with a tray of garlic truffle fries. They weren't even on the same level as Cruiser's, but they served their purpose as a substitute for us.

The couple next to me had left and now two girls that looked to be freshly legal took their stools. They giggled about something after the bartender took their order, placing two glasses accented with fruit in front of them. We weren't that much older than them, but I'd do anything to have that sense of naivety back.

I happened to glance down at my phone that was lying next to my newly replaced cocktail when a text notification appeared on the screen. When my eyes registered the name of who it was from, it felt like someone had my whole body in a vice grip, squeezing me until I'd burst.

Gus 🖤:

you're probably tired of hearing this from me but I can't say it enough. I'm sorry. if you don't want me to come to the wedding I won't. I know our moms have been talking a lot and pretty much decided for me that we're still coming. I was thinking I'd fly in with my parents instead on Wednesday rather than tomorrow with you guys given the circumstances, and to give you some extra time alone. I know it's gonna be awkward and weird no matter what. I was only gonna go for you, because you and your family have been such a huge part of my life. I just wanted to be there in support of you and your sister, but if you don't want me there, I completely understand and respect that. just let me know what you want me to do and I'll do it.

The last message between us, sent on December 31st, was from him. Prior to it, he sent an apology for how he acted when I went back to the apartment to get the rest of my belongings and give him my half of the rent, when we got into an argument that meant fucking nothing. I said it was okay and that I was behaving no better than him. He said Happy New Year anyway.

My first drink and the shot hit me hard considering I hadn't had much else other than wine at home for the last few weeks. I sobered right up when I digested the entire text.

Collin noticed I was staring at my phone, even after the screen had darkened and locked again. He nudged my shoulder with his to get my attention, so I grabbed my phone with a shaky hand and showed him the text from Gus.

His eyebrows came together, crinkling the skin between them and slightly shifting his glasses on his nose. I watched his eyes go back and forth as he read every word until he looked back at me with the same baffled expression.

"What are you going to tell him?" He asked.

I picked up my glass, chugged the potent liquid for a few seconds, then shrugged a shoulder.

A huge part of me wanted to tell him cancel his flight and stay the hell away from me because, as I've mentioned so many times before, we needed this break. But the teeny, tiny fragment inside that wanted this to work, that knew what Gus and I had was special and worth fighting for, was dying to say come anyway. I thought it was a kind enough gesture for him to reach out and ask me what I wanted him to do, and that made me realize he was trying. That was all I really needed.

I wasn't sure if it was me or the whiskey in control. I started typing up a response, paused to take another sip of my drink, and glanced up at Collin staring at me bug-eyed through his wayfarers.

"I think I'm gonna tell him to come."

〰️〰️〰️

A/N - oh hi, long time no talk??? WOW GUYS it feels great to be back!!! i missed writing/updating so much. sorry sorry sorry i've been MIA. i know this isn't one of my best chapters, but i felt like i owed it to y'all to get something up, whether it be perfect or not. i hope you guys missed bay, gus, collin, ziggy, etc. as much as i did.

in case ya missed it (or if you care about my personal life at all) here's the lowdown on what's been going on! i've been working a shit ton because my job is literally me, another girl, and my boss. that's it. so it gets hectic AF sometimes (all the time tbh). somewhere along the way, i sent my computer away to be worked on because it's a piece of SHIT. lo and behold: IT COULDN'T BE FIXED. so i've been without her for like 2 weeks now? i don't even remember but i've been so busy that i haven't had time to look for a new one which means i wrote this entire chapter on my phone! haha! i HATE IT! amidst all of this, i had 3 funerals all last week. august is gone, summer is over, everyone is dying. life has been insane but i am ECSTATIC i got a new chapter up for you guys.

thoughts on this chapter??? it's not too exciting but it's a preface to the wedding which will be a whole clusterfuck in itself. all i can say is get ready!!! we're about to embark on a hell of a ride and i cannot WAIT. this is the part i have been dying to write since i started this damn story. let's hope it comes out the way i want it to lol.

OK I AM DONE RAMBLING. THANK YOU SOOOOOOOO MUCH FOR YOUR PATIENCE! FORREAL IT MEANS EVERYTHING TO ME. YOU GUYS ARE SO GOOD TO ME. THANK YOU FOR READING. I LOVE YA LOTS AND LOTS!

xoxo, sabbbycat

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