Seventeen |

"You know, that is something I'd like to know as well, Mira."

My eyes turned down to the wooden stairs – an ant crawled slowly up one of the steps. I watched it silently, not speaking. I didn't know how to get out of this – even if I had told them the truth – that wouldn't change anything. Nor would it be certain that they'd even believe me. But, I didn't want to be a monster, I didn't want anyone to be afraid of me.

"I killed him because he was going to kill me," I spoke softly.

There was no point in hiding it now. I'd need to tell them the truth and put my trust in them. I just couldn't tell them the full truth. Alpha's hand let me go and silence fell over us. I didn't dare move.

"What do you mean?" Alpha's voice throbbed with authority.

I looked up at Jax, letting my eyes grow wide. I just prayed that they'd believe me now. However, I also needed to be careful and keep calm. As much as I felt trapped right now, I couldn't start acting like a trapped animal. A beast.

"I didn't want to tell anyone but," I paused for dramatic effect, "he worked with my father. My father was also a doctor."

Alpha sighed, "A doctor huh?"

I merely nodded, dropping my gaze. Tension in the air was clear however, it seemed Alpha had bought my statement. Jax on the other hand, I knew he'd be harder to convince. But I also knew he would wait until we were alone. So, I would have to make sure for the time being we weren't alone together.

"Fine. You're off the hook for now, I don't know what happened but I do know you have your own demons and secrets you need to protect. Not to mention with that man out of the way, you did save us from a lot of drama," Alpha grumbled merely shaking his head.

"Is that all?" Jax said lowly.

I turned my attention towards him, getting ready to argue when I realized he wasn't taking to me. His eyes were locked on Alpha. Alpha merely scratched his chin and shrugged.

"Yeah, I'll get the gate open tonight. Be safe on the way back," was all he said before he merely turned on his heels and left.

I watched him go with a sigh. My eyes tracking his movements until the very moment he pulled open the front door and strolled outside. Leaving me alone with Jax. I hesitantly looked back at him, his eyes watched me carefully.

"What exactly are you involved in?" he demanded.

I shook my head, "I could ask you the same. All the drama in my life is from the remains of the past, but clearly that's not the case between you people and the shadow men."

His eyes widened, then he did something that surprised me. He threw back his head and laughed, the musical sound captivating me as I watched spirited amusement take over his features. It brightened those hazel eyes and relaxed his shoulders and I couldn't help but blush. He stuck out his hand towards me and I gave him some side eye. At that he chuckled.

"Let's call it a truce and go home," he said cheerfully and I took his head.

That was the best idea I've heard in the few days we've been here.

We got back to Alana's town – home as Jax had put it – just after the sun had set. It took us the full day to travel back, as Jax wanted to go slow enough to be on high alert for any shadow men that may have come with Fredrick.

The front gates opened and we trotted through as soon as the gates closed and we had reached the stables Jax was off his horse and hauling me off mine. Just as Landon was sauntering over that fucked-up little grin on his face.

"Just the man I wanted to see. If you're done with your little toy then come talk," he purred to Jax nodding towards me.

I gritted my teeth when he called me a fucking toy but didn't comment. Something told me Landon was the last person I wanted to start a fight with. Jax shot me a glance then walked off after Landon.

It didn't bother me that he made no move to defend me because something told me that Landon was dangerous – and Jax knew that. Watching them go, I noted how Jax stayed on guard. Which meant Landon was no friend of Jax's.

"Still here?" sneered a voice.

I turned to face hard blue eyes and short locks of dark hair. Caren had her arms crossed over her chest and she glared down at me. I merely blinked up at her not in the mood to play petty games. All I wanted to do was have a bath to sooth my tired muscles then go to bed.

Who knew riding was so exhausting?

"What do you want?" I sighed exasperated.

She stepped towards me, her face inches from mine.

"You out of my fucking town. You stink of whore and everything think you're some great warrior of the dead zone but they're wrong. You're just a fucking savage," she snarled spiting in my face.

I took a step back and my hand flew up to the saliva on my cheek. Anger burned my vision red and I shoved my hand towards the middle of her chest. She cried out, falling backwards onto her butt gasping for air.

"Funny that it wasn't the savage who spit like an animal," I laughed bitterly then turned and started to walk away.

If she was lucky, my shove just knocked the wind out of her and not cracked a rib or worse. I smirked angrily, if she did have a cracked rib then that would surely teach her to back off and away from me.

Unfortunately Caren seemed fucking stupid. Clearly my threats from last time didn't mean shit to her tiny brain. Next time it might be worse, I had to keep my anger in check or I might even end up killing her one day.

My stomach pushed bile up my throat and I struggled to keep it down. I didn't want to kill anyone else, I was thinking stupid shit. If I didn't clear my mind and push all the negativity in my mind away then I'd end up one of those people dad had warned me to stay away.

"Am I becoming a monster?" I whispered to myself as I walked down the dirt path.

A hum had me looking up. My eyes widened at Alana who stood in front of me and I pulled a smile onto my face hoping she didn't hear my words. The old woman smiled warmly back briefly, holding out a bright red rose towards me. I took it a tad confused.

"They're quite beautiful aren't they?" she hummed softly.

I looked at her, but her eyes were locked on the rose in my fingers so I nodded numbly. I was unsure what she was getting at and when she took a step towards me, wrapping her frail, wrinkled hand around my own I didn't know how I was supposed to act. I merely stilled.

"One mystery is how nature thrived through the end of the world so long ago. Roses seemed to have even taken the end perfectly. They're beautiful but, quite deadly – or perhaps not even that is right. I would say they are beautiful but tough. They did what they had to do to survive but that doesn't take away from their beauty at all. I would argue that they are much more stunning because their will to live is so prominent – wouldn't you agree Mia?" her words were soft but powerful.

"Yes," was my hoarse reply.

I knew then, that she had heard my words and she was strongly disagreeing with them. My heart fluttered warmly and a lump grew in my throat. It was as if she believed in me – how long had it been since someone did that?

It also made me realize why she was mayor. Maybe it wasn't because she was a fighter but it was definitely because she gave out the one thing that threatened to be extinct – she gave out empathy and compassion. And those were essential for the survival of mankind.

Her eyes flickered up to my face and she smiled once again. Then stepped back, letting her had fall free of mine. My fingers tightened around the rose, and I winced feeling its thorns pierce my skin.

"Make sure you put the rose in water, have a lovely night dear," she chirped.

I smiled back at her, tears stinging my eyes, "You too Alana."

The walk back to the house was quiet. Few people were out and for that I was glad. I'm sure the exhaustion was visible on my face, as well the sweat and horse shit stank was wafting off my skin.

Reaching the porch, I bound up the steps and pulled the door open quickly. The house was brightly lit and the chatter inside cut off as Cam and Cici stared at me. I awkwardly stood there for a few moments until Cici squealed with delight.

"You're home! I missed you bestie," she sang throwing herself across the room at me.

Her arms wrapped around me into a tight hug and I hugged her back. Laughing, Cam looked at us completely confused. He merely shook his head then, his lips twitching with amusement. Then it was Cici who pulled away, and Cam who pulled me into another hug. My face heated up as my eyes widened with surprise.

"Welcome home," he spoke huskily into my ear.

I smiled and looked up at him and chuckled nervously, "Do you welcome everyone in such ways?"

"Of course. Whenever people go and return you should always say goodbye as if it could be the last and greet them the way you feel inside," Cici told me.

A pang in my heart and I nodded. I felt foolish, of course that was an important way to live. The door opened behind me and I turned as Jax walked through the door. I caught a whiff of cologne and instantly my eyes narrowed as I attempted to figure out the smell.

"You don't hug me when I return," he stated with a frown.

Cici laughed, patting his chest and Cam grinned at his older brother, Jax merely nodded back.

"That's because we're hoping you get bit. A zombie Jax wouldn't argue as much," she teased.

Cam rolled his eyes, "that and you go out so often its normal."

Jax shook his head fully amused with this conversation and I took the opportunity to lean towards him and sniffed. The smell of spices and fragrance assaulted my nose and I glowered. Of course it was him. Jax's hand grabbed my shoulder, pulling me away from him to look at me shocked and confused.

"Uh, Mira are you feeling ok?" Cam asked.

"Why the hell do you smell good and I smell like I rolled around in a barrel of sweat and horse shit?" I demanded ignoring Cam's question.

Jax merely smirked, letting me go, "because I am just that good."

I could feel my eyes bulge out of their sockets at his blunt display of narcissism and instantly my hand shot out to grab his collar and jerked his head down. He yelped as his face flew down to inches away from mine and fresh, minty breath fanned my face. Of fucking course.

"Oh my," giggled Cici.

"What is your secret you demon!" I roared.

"Wouldn't you like to know kitten," he purred winking at me.

My face flushed and I pushed his face away from mine, spinning on my heels to march towards the bathroom.

"I'm going to have a bath! Leave me alone!" I snapped.

"Need help?" Cici called.

"No!" both Cam and Jax snapped at her and I laughed, closing the bathroom door behind me. I was slowly realizing that Cici either enjoyed being sexually playful or that she was attracted to in the very least, the female gender. Not that it changed her and my relationship. I still thought she was absolutely adorable.

I stripped down as I started running the bath. Now that I thought about it, all of the people I've met so far were quite quirky in their own ways and if anything it made me love them even more.

A gasp through from my lips and my eyes widened. I stared at myself through the mirror, warm green eyes stared back and my face was bright and full of life – even my light brown hair looked oft and fluffy. Did I really love the relationships I had with Jax, Cam, Cici and even Luna? A smile tugged onto the face in the mirror and it nodded.

I honestly did.