Prologue

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Life was sometimes a blur. Not sometimes. Most of the time. Sex, alcohol, drugs. Parties, money, hangovers.

Car crash.

Something I would never forget was the disappointment in my father's eyes. I knew he thought I would never be like my siblings. I knew he thought I was a disgrace for my family.

My joke of a family.

My 10,000 square feet house felt small. Even the city of Paris felt suffocating. That's why I moved out at eighteen. That way they couldn't control me, that way I wouldn't have the constant thought in my mind of wanting to kill myself. Because God only knows how many times I had thought of that. Just so they wouldn't block my bank account, I would show them from time to time what was going on with my life. I would show them my new apartment, since it never lasted more than a year. New music I wrote, new paintings I created.

Never my writing. I never showed them what I wrote. That felt too intimate. And that was a part of my life I didn't think they deserved to be a part of.

Eventually I learnt that they just didn't love me. They just once loved the idea of this big and successful family.

What a shame that I ended up being the black sheep.

I stopped drinking in my early twenties. Crazy, but that's what happens when you start drinking at fourteen. I stopped doing drugs too, except for weed. It helped me feel calm.

One thing I never stopped was sex. Sex, sex, sex. Sex with girls, sex with guys, sex with girls and guys. Sometimes I stopped to think if maybe I had a problem with it. But I don't think there's a problem in wanting to have fun. Something that brings you so much life could never be a problem. I loved that attention, that affection. I needed it. And strangers gave it to me.

Never one to talk much, or express my emotions, I wrote them. I photographed them. I painted them. I played them.

But they never meant anything. I always felt numb, soulless. Sometimes a little angry, happy and sad at times. But my emotions were never strong enough. I thought that that was it. That was what you were supposed to feel. Nothing. I would never find that purpose that artists talked about. I would never find something to write about. Something to live for.

That's when I felt it. The day I wrote a song about you.

That's when I knew I was in love with you.

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Hey guys! New story ❤️

Hope you liked this little bit. I'll probably start updating next week, but I haven't written much so I won't have an update schedule. I have little time to write.

I'm so excited for this story since it's a bit different. If you're here because of my other stories, you don't have to worry, all my other characters will appear in this book. If you're new, you don't have to read the other books but it would be nice if you did you can understand the background and know the story behind the other characters.

Do you have any idea already of who could be the love interest? 🤔

Thanks for reading, don't forget to vote and let me know what you think in the comments ❤️

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