I laid in front of the fire wide awake staring at the ceiling with nothing but a blanket covering me. Kal was fast asleep next to me the poor thing was exhausted the twins were still asleep and I couldn't help but feel that my mother didn't like who I really was in my true form? Maybe I am too much like my father which my mother doesn't like. Oh well she isn't my problem anymore I don't live with her however I do feel especially about forcing my little sisters hand in the signing of the book of the beast but maybe now with the power she receives she will come to understand her full potential within this world.She is going to be one very special witch just like Edward said in his letter to me months ago, how he could have gave his wife away to my father willing showed how loyal he was to his dark lord, his saviour.

As I was laid thinking about all of this there was a knock at the door I knew it wasn't my mother or father I could sense it was Sabrina. "Kal wake up Sabrina is here go get clothes on" I said waking him up abruptly and I wrapped the blanket around me and answered the door "Sabrina?" I said and she looked at me "I need to speak" she said I could hear in her tone something wasn't right. "Are you okay?" I said walking her to the couch in the blanket she hadn't even noticed something was up. "Tonight I signed the book of the beast and created hell fire something I never thought I would ever do but I can't help but think something forced my hand into doing it" she said and my emotional side began to develop and resurface as tears ran down my face "Astrid?" Question Sabrina as she seen the cracks appearing "it was my fault Sabrina" I said before I thought and the look on her face was disgust.

"How was it your fault Astrid how could you have possibly forced my hand into doing any of that" she questioned trying to make excuses as to why I couldn't have possibly concocted such a thing. "My father said it needed to be done so I summoned the green dale thirteen and the red angel of death putting everyone in danger and I knew the only way to get rid of them was hell fire which you could create by signing the book and 'saving the day'" I answered and she was horrified and stood up abruptly "well if you did all this to me what else have you done" she questioned wondering if anything else I had done was a lie "your going to hate me because there has been so many lies told and I can't do it anymore keep it hidden for one I was never weak I could have stopped it all with a click of my fingers however I didn't, me and my father have been allies for longer than anyone thinks and I love having him part of my life." I said and she began to walk out the door "don't ever speak to me again Astrid how could I ever have trusted you" she said leaving and I broke down into tears. I broke my sisters heart in order to try and mend my but instead i broke hers and shattered mine why cant anything go right? i was sat on the couch crying when the twins started to cry i quickly wiped away my tears away and raced through to my gorgeous babies and both me and Kal began to give them their bottles. 

After a while we finished burping them and they went soundly to sleep and we put them back in each of their moses baskets. I headed to my room and got my dressing gown putting it on and going outside sitting on the porch lighting up a cigarette "can i have one?" asked Kal sitting next to me "you told her didnt you?" he asked and i nodded my head as he pulled me in for a cuddle "i broke i couldn't keep it from her the only thing i kept was that my father is hers too" i answered taking a puff of my cigarette with tears streaming down my cheeks staining them with every single tear that dared to fall. After a while Kal went back inside and i stayed out staring at the moon i can always remember telling Sabrina that if in any situation where we were separated to look at the moon because i would be too almost as we were right next to each other because it would be the same moon.  I doubt she will ever trust me again and i don't blame her i will be expecting a call of my mother at some point regarding tonight's events. i went inside and laid on my bed falling asleep crying the next day i was miserable i had to go apologise, Kal kept the twins as i went up to the manor i knocked on the door and my mother answered then shut the door in my face "VERY WELL THEN I WILL BE OUTSIDE UNTIL ANY ONE OF YOUS ARE READY TO SPEAK" i yelled through the door with a croaky voice from crying all night, i sat on the steps with my head in my hands crying i really had shot myself in my foot with my family they didn't want anything to do with me i always knew i was a fuck up.

I stood up and went to the door ready to make a speech " i know i fucked up big time i thought i was this tough girl all because her daddy was in her life now thinking she didn't need anyone else but him and her little family so she decided to screw everything up for the ones who were there for her every tear she shed through to the time she would need someone to confide in. But i threw that all under the bus and when i told you everything sabrina it was because i loved you and i couldn't keep it from you any longer  and i miss you and i cant believe i could have broken your heart on purpose and knowing that shattered mine in the process and i realised i still need my mum i need every single one of yous to function i cant go on with all the arguments i just want my family back i am so sorry." i said spilling my heart out crying my eyes out and the door opened and when they saw how much of a state i was in they just looked at me but my mum came over and hugged me whilst Sabrina kept her distance which i don't blame her for i would do the same.