Mavis.

Maybe if I hit my head hard enough it would stop working for a few seconds and just for a few seconds I could be at peace.

I'm not suicidal, just really tired of my brain. I just want to relax without feeling agitated and unsettled, it gets exhausting continuously having your brain overworking. Trying to distract it by watching a movie or reading sometimes help, but when the ADHD kicks in it's a goner.

I may appear as a calm person to others, more like indifferent but that's not the point. The point is my head is a constant carnage. Too many thoughts, too many ideas of what I should and what I shouldn't do, and it gets worst if people are surrounding me. That's why I keep my distance, avoid and ignore most humans. and if they don't, I don't care if I have to be extra rude and mean.

I go back to reality when I hear the front door of the house opening, just as I thought it was my mom. "Mavi baby, I'm home."

No matter how old I am, I don't think my mom would ever stop calling me that. But since she is the best mother in the world, I can't hold it against her. I stand up from the couch and stroll the haul to greet her.

"Hi," She was taking her shoes off while balancing a box of pizza in her hands, I seized it and kissed her cheek before taking the box to the kitchen. "How was your day?"

"It was nice, tiring but still decent." I heard her voice from behind. Both her and my father are surgeons, they are working several hours daily, which is not easy seeing how exhausted they can get. "Dad is not coming home tonight?"

She has returned from I assume the bathroom. Now facing me, she shook her head in denial, making her very black healthy straight hair motion play like she is doing a shampoo advert. "He got a late surgery to do. What about you? How was your day?"

I shrug, setting down the table so we could eat. "Plain and boring,"

She smiles and her small eyes almost close all the way, "just how you like them,"

She is right, I don't like unexpected things but sometimes I want to feel some excitement. "Indeed,"

We settle around in comfortable silence, eating and just enjoying each other presence. "So, made any new friends?"

I wanted to laugh at that, but I just cracked a smile. "Mother, in the twenty-one years I've been alive every time you asked me that question I gave you the exact same answer."

Which is no, I've never made friends.

She just shrugs, "I'm a hopeful person,"

I shake my head at her, taking a bite of my pizza before I say. "You should lose hope, it's never happening."

She sheepishly smiles like a young kid. "Never."

She is gorgeous, tanned skin and dark eyes adorned with the most beautiful black hair I've ever seen. My mother was a beauty, no wonder my dad is still so in love with her.

I inherited her dark eyes, even though mine were a bit bigger than her very prominent Asian ones. She is Indonesian, but lived her whole life in America where she met my very white dad and fell in love. Ardan is the one that looks the most like him. He has his blue eyes while Wren got Mom's. They are twins but they look nothing alike.

I'm honestly so thankful, if it wasn't for them I would be long gone. God, sometimes I don't know how they put up with me.

After we finished and mom freshened up, we lay around the living room and watch our favorite tv show, until I heard a pin from my phone indicating I got a message.

I scowl at my phone not understanding what he wants at this hour.

Dash: hey

Me: what do you want?

Dash: hello to you too.

Me: don't waste my time

Dash: alright, whatever. Can we reschedule tomorrow's meeting, something came up.

I take a big sigh, I don't like changes of plan. But I still type back.

Me: when?

Dash: anytime that helps you except for tomorrow morning. Also,I'm almost done with my part, we just need to meet to discuss a few points. It won't take long.

Me: okay, around 4 pm.

Dash: do you want to meet up at my house?

Me: don't push your luck

Dash: God knows I tried

I smiled at the last text and my mother clearly caught it as her next words were, "who are you texting and smiling at?"

I suppress the smile and roll my eyes at her. "I'm not smiling and he is just my assignment partner,"

She nods her head and hums. "Sure thing,"

I ignore her. Thinking of Dash again, he is nice. Maybe too nice, but somehow it's not as annoying as I thought it would be. I like that he is straight with his opinions (even if it's unasked for sometimes.)

But then again, this is not going to last long. It will be over the moment we are done with assignment, I don't need someone counting on me as a friend.