"Are you going home for Christmas?"

"I haven't even had time to think about it," I answer. "Things are so hectic at the hospital right now."

Elliott sighs. "Ivy! It's Christmas! You have to be with your family."

"I know, I know." I take a sip of my coffee before setting the mug back on the table and adjusting the phone to my other ear. "It's just kind of up in the air where everyone will be. Nora is spending Christmas with Flynn's family, and I don't know if Vic and Jackie would be able to make it back from Norway in time. Jett might just come to stay with me during his break, but he also wants to go on a skiing trip with his friends."

"Okay, well, as long as you're not sitting in your apartment alone watching a Home Alone marathon all night."

I hold back a smile. "How'd you know that was always my favorite way to celebrate holidays growing up?"

"Alright, Ivy, we get it. You had a rough childhood. Put a damper on some other conversation," he teases, comfortable with me in a way he hadn't been in years.

Elliott and I have been spending a lot of time together over the past few weeks. Whether we're texting, talking, or just grabbing lunch together, we've been together. Most days it feels like those five years were spent together, not alone. There are days when Elliott or I will bring up something we had done in those years that neither of us knew about, and the mood shifts to one more somber. Even so, I like spending time with him. Each day, we're working closer to a better friendship.

Of course I still have feelings for him, but I've been doing a very good job with keeping my feelings under wraps. We've managed to avoid any conversations about what we're doing and we expect from our friendship. For now, we're just enjoying the time we have together and making up for all we lost.

Regarding his comment, I stick out my tongue, even though he can't see my face. "I'm ending this call now. Bye, Liott. I'll call you after work, okay?"

"Sounds good. Bye, Ives. I love you."

My jaw drops along with my stomach when I register what he just said to me. The call ends. He said it so quickly, like an after-thought or something as such. I can imagine he is as panicked as I am right now. "I love you." Shit.

So much for our platonic friendship.

The whole time at work I can't stop thinking about those three words. There was a time when all I wanted from Elliott was for him to tell me he loved me. Now? This is the worst case scenario. He still needs time to get over Evelyn and their relationship. It's too soon. I don't want to have any awkwardness between us yet.

But, in a way, I knew it was bound to happen eventually. We couldn't just keep up the constant texting and talking without defining what is going on. I obviously would hope Elliott is on board with a relationship, but maybe it's best if we just remained friends. I know, we tried it once before, and it ended with heartbreak all over again. We're older and more mature now, however. I'm sure we'll be able to figure things out.

After work, I drive over to Flynn's with Elm. Since he and Nora left for Oregon today, he wanted me to spend the night at his apartment to be company for his hamster, Frog, who apparently has separation anxiety. It's dark outside by now, and the streets are dimly lit. The snow was only lightly falling when I got to the apartment, but now it's really coming down heavily.

Elliott has been staying at Flynn's for the weeks that Evelyn kicked him out of his own apartment. He feels guilty making her leave, since he's the one that broke up with her.

I sit on the couch and wrap a blanket around me, turning on the TV to ABC's 25 Days of Christmas special. A Christmas Story is on, and I entertain myself with the movie for awhile until I get a call from Elliott.

"Hey, did your plane just land?"

"No, I've been stuck at the freaking airport for like four freaking hours al-freaking-ready," he mutters. "Everything is freaking delayed. I already freaking missed Beth's freaking recital."

I try not to laugh at his overuse of the word 'freaking' and do my best to be sympathetic. "That really freaking sucks, Li."

"Yeah," he sighs. "Anyway, I wanted to call you just to make sure that you weren't freaking out about what I said on the phone."

"What did you say on the phone?" I pretend like those three words hadn't been on repeat like a mixtape the past ten hours. I turn into Meryl Streep with my acting skills. "The thing about my childhood sucking? Trust me, Elliott, I got the joke. I'm a total jokester."

"Oh." Elliott hesitates. "Right. Yeah, and the other thing, the I love you? If you did happen to be worrying about that, I was multitasking and also sending a text to my mom." Now that's what I call an excuse. "So, yeah. I didn't know if that's why you didn't call me after work, but maybe you were just busy. I don't know. You were probably busy and forgot. I just wanted to make sure you weren't weirded out by that."

"No, of course not. I didn't even..." Come on, Theater 101 pull through for me! "I didn't even notice."

"Oh. Good." He laughs slightly. "I guess I just made things awkward. So that's good."

I smile. "Yeah, you might've."

The sound on his line becomes muffled and for a moment I think he hung up on me. I hear Elliott mutter profanities under his breath before he's back on the line. "My damn flight was just cancelled!"

"Shoot," I say. "I'm sorry to hear that. When's the next flight out to Oregon?"

"I don't know. Probably next year, for Christ's sake!" Elliott says loudly, and I can easily imagine him directing this at one of the workers rather than me.

I try not to laugh because I know how upset he is right now. "Hey, don't worry. You'll make it back home in time. I'm sure there's a flight going out tomorrow morning."

"I know, I know." He sighs. "I guess I have to head back to Flynn's place and crash there for tonight since," his voice raises as he now talks to one of the workers, "I can't afford to stay at a hotel!"

"Elliott," I laugh lightly, "stop. They can't control the weather. I'm at Flynn's now, so I'll make you some hot chocolate and we can talk out your frustrated feelings, okay?"

"Why are you at Flynn's?" he asks.

"Someone had to be with Frog. You know how he gets separation anxiety."

"Flynn did not make you drive all the way out there after work to hang out with his hamster," Elliott says in disbelief. "I can't believe I'm friends with that guy."

"I'll see you soon, Li."

I end the call and immediately spring off the couch. Grabbing my bag from my suitcase, I put on some light makeup so that it looks like I didn't even try. I brush through my hair once before flipping my head around like I'm at a rock concert to assure that he doesn't think I'm trying to look good for him or anything stupid like that.

All I have in my bag are my scrubs and pajamas. Great, Ivy, I don't know why you didn't think about bringing some real clothes to hang out with a hamster!

Re-wrapping myself in a blanket, I sit cross-legged on the couch and try to look as casual as possible, though I'm out of breath from all that sprucing up.

While I wait for Elliott, I feel my stomach start to flutter with nerves. I usually don't get that way when I'm hanging out with him, but things are different now that he said those three words to me. Sure, he played it off with a solid excuse, but we all know he's not tech-savvy enough to text while making a phone call.

Just as the credits for A Christmas Story start rolling, the front door swings open and Elliott steps through the door and throws his suitcase on the floor. "Screw airports! Next time, I'm walking."

I shut off the TV and give Elliott a wave. "Hey, Scrooge."

He shakes his head and sits down on the couch next to me, tugging at the blanket for himself. I give slack to it to let the grump have some of the blanket. His knee rests against mine, and my skin feels tingly from his touch.

"Today sucked major balls," he sighs, flopping on his back and resting his head in my lap. I panic and hold my hands up in the air, unsure of where to put them. "How was your day?"

"I'm exhausted," I admit. "The hospital always seems to be the worst during the holidays." I wipe away an eyelash that fell on his cheek. "I have a twelve hour shift tomorrow too."

"R.I.P."

"Tell me about it," I sigh and drop one of my hands in his hair. I stretch my other arm out on the couch.

Elliott smiles contently, his eyes studying my face. "You're so beautiful, Ivy."

"Thank you," I reply simply, mindlessly running my fingers through his hair.

"Ivy, can I ask a question? I don't want you to freak out about it or anything though."

"I won't freak out," I promise.

He nods and clears his throat. He hesitates saying anything at first. "What are... What exactly are we doing?"

"I don't know, Elliott," I say. "I was sort of hoping you knew the answer to that."

"Oh, well, I don't know." He shrugs his shoulders. "I was thinking maybe, uh, maybe..." He trails off and stares at me, as if I need to be the one to say something more, to do something more.

"I think..." I start talking, but my mind is moving faster than my words. I think I want us to be together. I think I want to be your girlfriend. I think I really, really want you to kiss me right now.

As if he read my mind, Elliott lifts up and tentatively presses his lips against mine. He drops back almost immediately, nervously, his eyes asking for permission. I don't hesitate to pull him in for a much more passionate kiss. He sits up on the couch to readjust his position, his body hovering over mine.

"God, I'm so in love with you," he mutters in between kisses.

"I knew you weren't multitasking," I say breathily when Elliott stands up from the couch. He grabs my hand in his and pulls me with him to the guest bedroom.

There is no way to describe how much I have missed this feeling, his touch. I went on dates with other men during the five years, and I never experienced the same electricity I do with Elliott. I melt at his touch. Something between us is so raw and desperate that it makes my entire body shiver.

I wake up the next morning next to Elliott. I'm up before he is, and I take the moment to be an Edward Cullen and watch him sleep. I lean forward and gently kiss his forehead.

"I love you," I whisper, afraid of what would happen were I to say it too loudly.

Elliott wakes up a few minutes after me. A pure smile falls on his face immediately. "Good morning."

"Good morning," I say back, unable to stop smiling myself.

He gives me a quick peck on the lips before getting out of bed and stepping into his sweatpants that hang dangerously low on his hips. "You want some coffee?"

I nod and watch as he walks out of the bedroom, the muscles in his back calling me to follow him into the kitchen. I grab my phone off the nightstand and check the time. I'll have to leave for work in two hours. I'd much rather stay in bed with Elliott all day, but I know that he has to try and make a flight back home today as well.

I roll out of the bed and throw on Elliott's shirt that he left on the floor. I stop in the bathroom to fix up because I was looking like a someone who just went through the garbage disposal.

"Hey, Li, do have any toothpaste?" I call from the bedroom.

"Yeah. Go in my bag. I'm sure there's some somewhere," he replies.

I walk over to his suitcase and unzip the top to look for toothpaste. His bag is a mess. He must've thrown everything in their last minute. Not one shirt is folded and random miscellaneous items are scattered around. My fingers wrap around a tiny velvet box, and I feel my pulse begin to quicken. Oh damn.

I lift the lid of the small square box, praying it's where he keeps his scented condoms. However, as expected, inside sits a beautifully carved diamond ring. An engagement ring. For her.

Closing the lid, I clutch the small box in my right hand and walk out of the room to the kitchen. "You were going to propose to her?"

Elliott turns around with his eyebrows drawn together. "What are you talking abo-" he stops mid-sentence, and his face softens when he sees the box in my hand. His mouth hangs open.

"You were going to propose?" I ask again, unable to wrap my mind around it. I feel myself starting to tear up, but I hold back my emotions as best as I can. "Please just tell me you were holding it for Flynn until he proposes to Nora. Please, tell me that. Please don't tell me you were going to propose."

Elliott looks at the kitchen counter. "Ivy, I- It is mine, but-" He stops talking and shrugs.

I chuck the box at his head, and he dodges it skillfully. "Don't give me bullshit about being in love with me when you were going to propose to Evelyn less than a month ago!"

"It's not bullshit!" he argues and runs in front of me. "I am in love with you!"

"Don't!" I cry. "Please, just stop! You wanted to marry her, Elliott! Do you get that? You were going to propose, yet at that Thanksgiving party you tell me you're still in love with me? Giving me some type of hope, when you already chose her?" I ask, pushing at his chest.

"Ivy," he says, grabbing for my hands.

I squirm out of his grip and push at him again. "What kind of bullshit is that, huh?" I push harder, tears rolling down my cheeks. "Huh?"

"The ring isn't for Evelyn!" he screams, gripping the my arms. I stop fighting, and he lets go of my arms. Much more calmly, he says, "it's yours."

"What?" I say stupidly, no other things to say coming to mind.

The kitchen becomes silent. "I bought it for you, Ivy," he says. "I bought you the goddamn house and I bought you that damn ring."

I feel my breath become shaky. "It's mine?"

"Yes. I mean, I bought it for you three years ago, but it's still yours." He sighs. "I don't know why I never went and returned it. I don't know why I keep it with me wherever I go. I don't know why, Ivy, but it'll always be yours."

I wipe the tears that had fallen. "I don't... I don't know what I'm supposed to say right now."

"That's alright."

"I'm sorry, Elliott."

"It's alright."

I shake my head slowly. "It's not. It's not okay. I... I mean, we could've been happy right now, Elliott. We could've been really happy."

"I am really happy, Ivy," he says, his hand squeezing mine gently. He wipes my tears and kisses the top of my head. "I am."

"Promise?" I ask.

"Yes, I promise," he says and smiles widely. "Those five years are dead and gone in my mind. The past is in the past."

"You're going to sing, aren't you?" I ask, raising an eyebrow in half amusement and half sadness.

Elliott smirks. "Let it go! Let it go! Can't hold it back anymore!" Elliott dances with me around the kitchen to his horrible singing. "Let it go! Let it go! Turn away and-" He slams a kitchen cabinet. "Slam the door!"

I laugh and cover his mouth with my hand. "For the love of all things Disney, please stop."

"Okay, okay," he says and pecks my lips. "Sorry." He picks up the box that I threw at him and holds it in his hand tightly. "I am sorry, Ivy."

"Don't be," I say. "We're letting it all go, Liott. The past is in the past."

He nods. "Right."

"So, now, under the newfound terms stated in the Frozen bible, what exactly are we doing?" I re-ask Elliott's question from last night.

"Aside from each other?" I whack his arm playfully. "I'm just joking!" he laughs. "Gosh, I thought you said you knew how to take a joke, you total jokester." He pinches my side, and I crumble into him in laughter.

"Come on, Elliott, stop avoiding my question."

"Okay, okay." He clears his throat and slowly bends down on one knee, taking my hand in his. I raise my eyebrows, unsure of what to expect from Elliott. "Ivy Lynch," he pauses for an overly dramatic effect, "will you go on a date with me?"

"I'll have to get back to you on that one," I say. He jumps up and leans in for a kiss. I push at his chest. "Whoa there. I don't kiss until after the third date, Kennedy."

"Oh, really. Since when?"

I shrug. "I just decided it'll be more fun to have you wait. You should really get to know me before we have our first kiss."

Elliott shakes his head. "First kiss? Come on, Ivy. We had our first kiss over six years ago. I mean I lost track of all of our other kisses but I'd say at least three more."

"At least," I agree with a smile.

"So, I now have to wait for the third date?" he asks to clarify.

I nod. "Third date."

"Okay, I can handle that." He turns around to finish making our coffee.

I go to sit at the counter, and Elliott joins me after a few minutes. I sip my coffee, happiness bubbling inside me. Elliott tells me about the first time he had coffee, thinking he hasn't told me this story already, but I know it by heart. By the time we finish our coffee and conversation, I have to get ready for work.

"Wow, that was such a nice first date," Elliott exclaims when he takes away my mug to put in the sink. "Can't wait for our second date."

I laugh and go into the bathroom to change into my scrubs. When I walk back outside, Elliott isn't anywhere to be seen. "Elliott, I really have to go to work. Where are you?"

He walks out of his room with a dead bouquet of flowers. "Here." He shoves the flowers into my hands. I look down and note that they have a tag on them that says to Nora. "Let's walk."

Bundled in winter clothes, Elliott and I walk to the hospital from Flynn's apartment. I can't believe I agreed to walk with him. It takes us over thirty minutes to get to the hospital.

"Gee, one of my favorite second dates!" Elliott says cheerfully.

I shake my head after catching on to his plan for the day. "You are truly something, Elliott."

"Thank you. I'll see you when I get back from my trip," he says and hugs me goodbye.

"Bye, Li." I turn and start walking to the hospital doors. I stop immediately when something icy and cold hits me in my back. He better wish he didn't start this one.

"Hi," he says with a grin, another snowball already formed in his hand.

I duck when he throws a bullet in my direction. I nearly dive into a snow pile to start making a snowball. With my inability to pack the snow into a ball, I end up making some type of snow pile. I just throw the snow in handfuls at Elliott. It takes up a lot of energy and by the end of it I collapse into the snow covered grass.

Elliott falls beside me. "Well, that would be one of the most fun third dates I have ever had. What do you say about that, Ivy?"

I laugh and roll over to lay on his chest. I lean down and give him a sweet kiss before standing up and dusting the snow off my coat. "Thanks for the speed dating, Li. I'll see you when you get back from Oregon."

"Or you could come with," he says, still laying in the snow. "Be with my family, invite Jett to come too."

"I don't know if I could get off work that easily." I look up at the sky when the snowflakes start falling on my face. "Like I said, it's super busy and-"

"Well, there's two options I see. One, you request off work and I assure you that you'd be able to get off for at least three days," he says. "Or I'll just have to fly my entire family out here. Either way, you're not spending Christmas alone."

"I'll