Sophia's P.O.V.

One of Bryce's friends offered to buy us coffee. The bubbling black substance they claimed to be coffee wasn't appetizing. Most of the food they served at the hospital's cafeteria was nowhere near digestible or editable.

My parents only stayed for an hour, leaving because they had to get the boys from the babysitter. My mother asked if I wanted to come along with her and stay in my old room. I told them that I'd be staying at Nicolas' loft again for the night. I would, however, swing by my old room at her house to pick up some extra clothes.

Bryce got Anthony to pick up Nicolas' car and drive it to the hospital. I still couldn't wrap my head around how he possible got into the car to begin with, but something about how Bryce said Anthony was 'good with cars' made me think he did something to it to unlock it and start it up.

Nicolas didn't mind a stranger driving his car, anyhow. He thought Anthony was cute. I didn't see it, but I wasn't planning on divulging on why in front of Bryce.

The tiny circle of people we had formed in the lobby went back and forth on food breaks until ten pm came around and a doctor entered the lobby to talk to Conner.

He had lied and said he was engaged to her. He couldn't make any serious decisions, since he wasn't next of kin. Her parents were held up in Budapest. Conner had called them a little after we arrived. Once they heard about the shooting incident, they said they were going to take the first flight back home.

Conner returned, less distraught then he had left. "She's going to be okay."

The small group we had formed erupted, cheering until the lady at the receptionist desk properly told us to quiet down.

"The surgery went well," Conner said. "There's still a lot that needs to happen before she can have visitors. She's got a long recovery ahead of her and I don't want her to have to deal with people towering over her."

"I get it, man. You should be the first that goes in once she can see visitors," Anthony chimed in. "No one's going to deny that."

"Do you think her parents will be back in the States by the time she's ready?" one of Bryce's friends had asked. A fleet of people had come to support and send their condolences for Conner and Kelsey when it was first predicted that she may lose her life.

"I don't know. Maybe, maybe not. I called them but it isn't clear on when their first flight out will be."

The rest of the group started to discuss minor things. Conner, in the end, asked everyone to go home. A few initially went against that request, saying they wanted to stay here for him, but he told them that he'd call them if any new information was brought to his attention and that he didn't want anyone to feel obligated to stay.

"I'll be fine here." Conner insisted, patting Anthony's back. "I'm not even tired."

"I'll leave the keys to my car with you then, just in case you want to drive back home." Anthony handed them over to him. "I'll ride with Ernie."

Bryce brought Conner to the side, talking to him quietly about matters I wasn't aware of. He spoke so fast, it was hard for me to eavesdrop. Once he was finished, he returned to where I was seated. "How are you getting home?" he asked. "Are you staying at the dorms?"

"Oh, well, I was planning on staying with Nicolas at his loft for the night. I have to go to my mom's house first though and get some stuff." I replied. "I don't want to go back to that dorm...not anytime soon at least."

Re-entering the dorm room I shared with Brooklyn and Lora was something I was going to have overcome one of these days, but I didn't want that to be today. The strain on my heart was at an all-time high after Kelsey got shot. I didn't have the energy, or the willpower, in me to go into that room.

"Do you think it's possible if you could stay with me for the night?" Bryce's words struck me as a surprise. "I don't mind driving you back to your mom's place to get necessities and a change of clothes."

Him asking me to stay over didn't seem to add up with me. With Santiago out of the picture, Bryce didn't have to take the extra step to protect me anymore.

"You don't have to look after me. I'll be fine at Nicolas' loft." I reassured, touching his arm.

"Please. Only for tonight," he pressed on.

Was his paranoia in that deep that he couldn't imagine me leaving with Nic? I couldn't seek an answer from how he spoke or in the mannerism of how he acted.

I knocked-down any notion that by saying "only for tonight" meant he'd be done with me by morning. I should have a little more faith in my relationship with Bryce. We did almost die less than twelve hours ago. That had to count for something in my realm of low self-esteem and negative anti-pep talks.

"Okay, I'll stay with you tonight then." I stood from my chair and gave Nicolas' a goodbye hug. Bryce walked ahead of me when we left the hospital and set his hand on the small of my back, guiding me through the parking lot.

"Are you hungry?" Bryce asked when we got in his car. "I can drive to the nearest fast food restaurant if you'd like."

I clicked on my seat belt. "That would be nice. The coffee I've been drinking since we got to the hospital hasn't done much for me."

"I'm kind of hungry, too. I just couldn't picture myself eating until we found out about Kelsey's surgery."

"Yeah, same here. I'm happy to hear the surgery went well though. All that's left to do now is wait for her to recover." I remarked while pushing the buttons of the stereo, trying to find a good station.

"I wish Conner would consider sleeping at his apartment instead of at the hospital, but I understand why he'd want to stay. This hit him harder than I thought it would've. He's not a sensitive guy -and yet here he is, doing a complete one-eighty."

"People change whenever something or someone they love is put in harm's way."

Bryce's forehead creased and a haunting, almost devastating gleam, glimmered into his eyes. "I know how true that can be."

If it weren't for the incident that had darkened all of our hearts today, I would've let my curiosity dig a little deeper and decipher that look he just gave me. Bryce wasn't a stranger to grim, somber expression. The guy was practically known for it at this point; it was what he wore best. I wanted to know, desperately, what was the cause of all that pain in his eyes whenever he talked about death.

He had once said that he feared never seeing the age of thirty, and that in itself was something that made loops around my head at every possible chance I considered a future with Bryce. How was I meant to contemplate on a potential life with him if there was this burdening fear hanging over us?

There's fear in every relationship, Sophia. No relationship is perfect. They all have their faults and flaws, my thoughts had chimed in on their own, answering my questions. Fear shouldn't be the cause of you not living your life to the fullest, it should be the grand push you use to fuel your dreams and do things you never thought possible.

I shut off my mind from the motivational speech mulling in my head. I knew I wanted to be more "up-beat" about what I pondered about, but going full-on preach mode wasn't my plan either. If I kept this up, I'd start making those motivational posters I always saw in my guidance counselor's office in high school.

•••

Bryce drove us to the nearest In-N-Out. There was one close to the campus that he went to. I offered to eat in the car - like I always did when Remy and I ate food at this particular place - but Bryce decided to go inside instead.

After opening the door for me, he held my hand. And when I thought he'd let it go, he didn't. These were, sadly, all things I didn't experience with Remy unless we were miles away from campus.

Once we got our food, I got a table for us and he brought over the two trays. I devoured the hamburger and fries as if he wasn't there, watching me eat. Manners and forced etiquette were not present during our meal, and I couldn't be happier. It felt real - shockingly real. I didn't bashfully cover my mouth with my hand or with a napkin, quickly dabbing at my mouth whenever a bit fell apart. I typically hated eating in front of people, but it was different this time, almost natural and casual.

After polishing off my milkshake, we disposed our trash and drove to my mother's house. Bryce asked if I wanted him to go inside with me. He also wondered if my mom would mind me bringing him in.

"Yeah, she would actually be pissed." I said and Bryce chuckled. "I don't get why you're laughing. I'm being serious."

"I thought you said you snuck in a guy before?"

"Yeah, you missed the keyword: 'snuck in.'" I used quotation marks, making bunny ears with my fingers. "My mom would never let me bring a boy up into my room."

"Nicolas has been in there though."

"Nicolas is a totally different story." I supplied.

Bryce turned off his car once we pulled up to my mother's house, stopping in the driveway. "It's because he's gay."

"No, he's not," I lied. I'd rather lay down in the middle of the street, ready for a car to come by, than to spill Nicolas' secret out to the world. "I don't know where you got your information from -"

"I heard you two talking about Anthony in the hospital, him more so than you." He revealed. "I had my suspicions before then, but it was confirmed from how he gave subtle hints on his attraction to him. I don't have a problem with that, but Anthony is with someone. Don't mean to rain on his parade."

"He does?"

I quickly recalled the blonde girl Anthony had brought with him to the carnival.

"He's been dating a girl named Tonya for a few months. It's nothing serious from how he paints it. He's having fun."

I hit his arm.

"Ouch. What was that for?"

"That's a girls emotions he's playing with and you simply wrote it off as if it was no big deal."

"That doesn't justify you hitting me." He rubbed the spot I had smacked. "He's just enjoying himself like everyone else our age."

"Everyone else our age?" I repeated, sealing my rage with a cap. Out of nowhere, I was taking this as a personal attack. "Is that something you're interested in?"

"No, I've liked how things have been going with us so far...up until you hit me for no reason."

I slumped in my seat. "Sorry."

The fire in my belly had lessened into a mere ember, fighting against the dying cause. This argument had come to its end sooner than expected. He hadn't gone for the response I was worried about.

I had thought he'd say: No, I don't want that at the moment but I may change my mind.

I opened the car door and told Bryce to come with me. "You might as well come in. It's not like my mom hasn't seen you already today."

I waited for Bryce to join me on the front porch before knocking. I had left my house keys in Nicolas' car. Jamie opened the door, looking at us with squinted, sleepy eyes.

"What are you doing up so late? It's almost midnight." I whispered.

"I couldn't sleep." He yawned and then raked his gaze over Bryce. "What are you doing here with a boy? I'm telling mom."

I held on to the collar of his shirt. "No, you're not because then I'll tell her you were up this late watching Tv."

"Was not!" He whined. "You're making up stories."

"Then why is the channel on at this hour?" I asked. "It's on Disney, meaning you were the last one to have watched it. Thomas couldn't have possibly put it on."

"Okay, alright, alright. I won't snitch on you." I released my hold on his collar and that was when I saw him tap the center of his palm. "But only if I get a little something."

"No way, you little brat." I barked.

Jamie puffed up his chest, ready to belt out a high note.

"Fine." Bryce jumped in, pulling out his wallet and bringing out two twenty dollar bills.

"You are not about to give him that." I tried to put the money back into the wallet, but Bryce only moved around my hands and handed it to Jamie.

"Whoa." Jamie's jaw widened in awe, flipping the two bills back and forth. "I've never gotten this much before. I should try this more often."

"No, you shouldn't." I hissed, but he didn't hear a thing I said. He was up the stairs and in his room before I could take it from him. Facing Bryce, I entered the house with my hands crossed over my chest. "You shouldn't have done that."

"It's not that important. I took my cut from Santiago before I went to the island. There's a lot more where that came from. It's pocket change."

I waved him off and went up the stairs, heading toward my old bedroom. Despite moving to the dorms, I still slept in it the bedroom at least once a month.

"Geez." Bryce scanned the room. "Are you sure this is your room? It's kind of...pink. I didn't expect to see this many stuffed animals and," he held his breath while looking at a New Kids on the Block poster, "Oh God, you're a block-head. I forgot. It's worse than I predicted. I never saw you as a girly girl."

"I'm not a girly girl." I denied, rolling my eyes as he fell on to my bed and picked up one of my stuffed animals. "I haven't changed my room since I was thirteen. It's kind of stayed the same."

"I can tell. It's very innocent...which I know you're not." He furthered his statement by closing his lips around his tongue ring.

A flash of heat spread from my neck to my cheeks, thinking of the first night I stayed at his apartment.

"I'm only staying at your place for a night," I said, stuffing a set of sweats into a tiny suitcase. "That's all we agreed on."

"You can stay longer than that; you know that Sophia. I'd actually prefer that even." He threw one of the teddy bears in the air and caught it, doing that a couple times while speaking. "You said you wanted to visit Kelsey whenever she's allowed to have people come and see her. With your car still in the shop, I could lend you my car and you can stay at my place. It's not like you'll be able to sleep at the dorms after what happened there."

I froze, mid-fold with a pair of jeans in my hands. "It seems like you're asking me to move in with you."

"I wasn't thinking of it like that," he prompted, sitting up on my bed with his elbows. His shirt slid up a bit, giving me a peak of his flat, rippled stomach. "It would only be temporarily. Until you can figure out a better living arrangement. I don't like the idea of you going back to that dormitory. It's not safe. Grayson is still very much out there."

That had not occurred to me until Bryce said it. Grayson didn't have a reason to go against us  since Santiago was dead. But he could easily seek us out for his own person vengeance if that ever became the case.

Bryce got up from his comfortable spot on my bed and moved in behind me, resting his chin on my shoulder as I continued to fold. "I feel responsible, if not entirely at fault, for making your life unsafe."

"My dad is partly to blame."

"You're life was far better off though. His work didn't interfere into your normal life."

"Normal," I scoffed, twisting around so were looking at each other. "Normal doesn't mean it was better. Being in a four month long secret relationship with a guy you think you're in love with isn't an ideal way to spend your sophomore year."

"Neither is dealing with half the criminals I have to be around."

I smiled. "You're better than all of the people in the Annenberg family. I'd pick you instead of Remy early on if I ever got the chance to go back and do it again."

Bryce's lips curled and his arms held me in place, drifting firmly to my lower back. "Do you regret being with him?"

"No." I stunned myself at my words, and even Bryce. "I don't regret it, because I don't think I would've appreciated what we have here if it weren't for my awful experience with Remy."

I felt bad at how harshly I talked about Remy. He wasn't evil to the core. He had his sweet moments. I had fallen for him for his humor and personality. He had qualities that were worth pointing out, but it was what he lacked in character that made me ignore those shining details.

I could say the same thing about Bryce, but for the opposite. He had bad things latched to his name, but the positive outweighed the negative.

With the amount of times I'd turned him away, I would've expected Bryce to give up on me by now.

It made me smile at the thought of it, but each time I saw myself pull back from Bryce, I only ever sensed him come closer in response, as if there was a linkage even I couldn't break.

We were tethered hearts, joined with a string of hope that neither Bryce nor I could split. We couldn't be anymore drastically different than each other. He was wrong for me for every possible reason. It was a tragedy disguised as a romance, but I didn't see myself putting a knife to that thread.

I wasn't that strong.

I sealed the moment with a kiss, caressing his cheek with my hand as I allowed it to deepen. Soon enough, I felt us gradually moving to the wall of my room, hitting the posters. I didn't know what had gotten into me. I should've stopped it since it wasn't his house, but the second his hand snuck up my shirt, I saw all sense of reason fleeting.

Bryce skimmed his hand the wire of my bra, brushing his thumb over the silky fabric. "I missed you, Sophia."

"I missed you, too." I grinned against his lips, unable to stop myself. "I was only gone for less than two days."

"That's long enough," he groaned, returning to the kiss and popped the first three buttons of my blouse, leaving my chest partially exposed. Bryce leaned back enough to see this, and he was visibly pleasure at the sight. Biting on his lip, he said, "Fuck, I can't wait until we get home. I just wanna -"

"Shh, not here." Blocking off his hands from reach to the front of my pants, I looked at him. "Let's go before my mom sees us leave."

A hard knock banged against my door. We glanced at it, and to our dismay, it was open. My mother, still in her night gown, was staring at us with a death glare. "Too late. I see you."

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please remember to vote & comment. BTW, a blockhead is a word referring to a super fan of New Kids on the Block.