I found that after my conversation with Adam, everything in me felt a little clearer. I didn't realise how much of a weight the problem between me and him caused and how much heartbreak and denial were kept inside of me because of it.

I had gotten everything out. All the anger and resentment, it was now gone. I said what I needed to say, told him how I felt, and even got answered to everything. None of it was to do with me. I wasn't the problem. He was.

For some reason, having told Adam the problems he left me with, made the problems in itself seem easier to cope with. I was more content. I was ready to move on.

If only this had happened sooner.

However, I didn't want to dwell too much on the past. Since the party, Roman has had zero contact with me. I took that as a sign. Maybe this was over. Maybe all of this had reached its limit and neither him nor I could make it okay.

It was difficult to think about. That thought made my light dim a little, but I couldn't focus too much on it. If him not reaching out to me was him moving on, then so be it. I needed to move on too. Even though it hurt like hell.

It was now Sunday and I offered to collect the groceries from the local corner shop as my dad was busy with his new gardening project with his new clients, and my mom had a night shift and needed to get some extra sleep beforehand. Plus, I needed some fresh air and knew that there was a shortcut back home through the local park.

Rya and I used to play hide-and-seek in the neighbouring woods when we were younger. I could imagine it as I walked through the trees and remembered a little Rya with her cat Piggy in her arms as she threw him – and I literally mean threw him – onto a tree branch and then climbed up next to him to hide. Her and that cat were tied at the hip. And so were we.

I tried calling Rya, but she didn't pick up, I ended up calling her dad for him to tell me that she was sick. I knew it wasn't just a sickness and that half of it was tied in with a hangover, but I had a plan to talk to her. It was just a matter of when.

The park wasn't as busy on a Sunday, but I still saw kids running around, swinging on the swings, eating little sandwiches on the picnic tables with their parents and it made my heart melt. For me, little kids were either nightmares or the cutest things ever. Rya always liked to call children miniature satans, and I couldn't blame her. That girl despised children with a burning passion. Me on the other hand? I knew in time I'd want them. I wanted to be a mom like my own, and I waned to give my kids advice on the things I had learnt and the mistakes I had made. However, being a teen mom was not in my agenda. Yet the idea of having little mini-me's running around made me melt a little bit just at the pure thought.

My phone vibrating in my pocket caught me off guard and I pulled it out to look at the screen. An email. An email? The only person I had emailed recently was Mr Wright when he let me know my interview was sent off to UNC Chapel Hill. Was there something wrong with it? Did I not get accepted?

My heart began to race as I opened up my emails. Yet, Mr Wright's username was not what I saw. No. It had Roman's name in it.

Sienna,

If you don't want to talk to me, I understand, but I want to explain myself to you. I want to talk. Please listen to the audio below and if you want to talk to me afterwards, I'll be waiting. I think it's time we figure all of this out. I want us to have a chance.

Roman.

My whole world completely stilled as I read the message again and again, my eyes scanning over every single word. I want us to have a chance.

I didn't know how to feel, but here he was reaching out to me, and I knew that whatever was in that audio would either make or break us.

With nervous fingers, I clicked on the audio underneath and held the phone up to my ear.

The first thing I could hear was muffled music and people speaking before a door slam shut.

"So.... What d'you want to do?" the suggestive, taunting voice of Nikki spoke.

There was a few minutes of silence before, "I want you to tell me the truth." Roman said bluntly.

Nikki laughed, "What truth?" I heard her footsteps getting closure.

"The truth about Sienna." The footsteps stopped.

"Oh my god! Are you seriously still so hung up on her? She's a bitch, Roman. Get over it."

"I'm not a fucking idiot, Nikki. I know you did something." His voice became deeper.

Nikki scoffed. "And what makes you think that? Jesus, I was coming up here for some fun. Not for some pitiful interrogation."

"How did you know I got a scholarship to Penn?" Roman demanded.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I could imagine her rolling her eyes.

"A couple days ago at lunch, you asked me about my scholarship to Penn. There are only four people that know I even went up for that scholarship, only three knew I got it." Roman got into Penn. Oh my god, he got into Penn?!

"Plus, you talked about Sienna's chance at a UNC Chapel Hill scholarship, and I know damn well she would never tell you about that."

"My dad's the Vice Principal, duh? So, I obviously know everything because he tells me. I have good access."

"Exactly your dad is the Vice Principal." I heard his footsteps walk towards her slowly. "And didn't your dad also set up the CCTV cameras in the halls a good couple months ago?"

Nikki sighed, obviously bored, "And?"

"And wasn't that video of the talk between you and Sienna of the CCTV footage. Sounds like you'd have good access to them too."

My heart was pounding out of my chest as I listened to the seconds of silence following afterwards.

"What even is this? I was the one who was there for you after that bitch embarrassed you! She talked about you like some piece of shit!"

I waited again, my pulse hammering hard against my skin. "I was embarrassed when that video got send out. I was so angry and heartbroken I could even see or think straight but you took that as your opportunity to drag me around everywhere. To use me as your little object. But then I got some common sense when my head started to clear, and I realised something."

Nikki chuckled carelessly and sighed, "Fine, tell me whatever the hell you realised. It'll only make you look like even more of an idiot. You've finally gotten popular, and you honestly want to throw that all away?"

"I don't give a shit about popularity believe it or not, and now I'm only popular because of something horrible or the way I look, but before any of this I was good at observing and I didn't fail to notice how every time you looked at Sienna, you seemed to envy her so much. You wanted what she wanted. You wanted that power. So, as soon as you got the chance to knock her down and take it. You took it. You've hung around her long enough to know the way she works. You knew she would do something – say something to protect the people she cares about. You knew she would fall right back into her persona as a safety net and be a bitch."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I felt like I was going to pass out.

There were a few minutes of silence where I felt like I was standing on the edge of a cliff before I heard Nikki click her tongue.

"Fine. So what if I did?" there. There it was. She chuckled lightly and I heard footsteps walk towards him. "So what if I did something? It only shows much bitchy and immature she is. You don't want a girl like that, Roman. A girl who has so many... issues."

"Shut the fuck up or I'll –"

"Or you'll what?" Nikki cut him off with a sugary, threatening tone. "I could still spread that rumour."

"What rumour?" Roman's voice got lower and curious.

"Oh, you know, how Sienna's given you sex in return of you doing practically all her work for her. I wonder what both your colleges would think of that? I'd kiss goodbye to my scholarship if I were you... and her."

"That's not even true. You're fucking disgusting. What the fuck is wrong with you?" His voice turned angry.

"You said it yourself; Sienna had the power. The power was supposed to belong to me until she stole it. I've got the Vice Principal dad! I've got the pretty blue eyes and the red hair! I've even got the stupid little dog and the white freaking Porsche! It's all supposed to be me, but she gets everything!" woah... I was hearing a knew side to Nikki I didn't even know existed.

I could hear every single breath Roman took. I could imagine the sick smile on Nikki's face.

"Well then you can have all of that if you just leave us alone." Roman negotiated calmy.

"Oh no." Nikki scoffed. "It doesn't work like that. High school's almost over and she's already gotten everything! Unless..."

"Unless what? Tell me what you want so you can just leave us alone."

Nikki giggled and I heard her step back. "Fuck me."

I froze and nausea rose in my throat. What?

"What?" Roman questioned exactly what I was thinking.

"You heard me, fuck me." Nikki repeated. I had to swallowed down the vomit climbing up my throat as those words left her lips. "Oh, c'mon, Roman." I heard her walk towards him. "I'm sure I can give you a much better time than she can..."

"Don't fucking touch me." He warned and I heard him walk away from her.

"Sienna's gotten everything. Including you. She's not allowed to be your everything. Someone else needs to show her she can't."

"You're delusional. Only I get to decide who's allowed what and what not from me. Get the fuck away from me, Nikki." He gritted through his teeth.

"How's about this, you fuck me – and I mean really fuck me – and I'll leave you both alone forever. No more scholarship drama, no more threats. You guys can live happily fucking ever after."

I wanted to throw up. He wasn't going to take this. No, he couldn't take this. It was so vile and wrong.

I waited, practically holding my stomach to hear more. "If... If I do this.... Then you'll promise to leave us alone."

"It'll be like I was never there." she whispered. No. No. He couldn't do this. Nobody could do this. It was so vile I couldn't even find words to describe the horrible nauseousness I was holding down.

I listened to him take a deep breath, how it shook and quivered. "... Fine." And then I heard it all. The connecting of their lips, the rustling of their clothes. And then the door open.

"Sienna?" he pulled away and gasped. That was where the video ended.

It was at the party. All of it was at the party before I came in. That was why he was making out with Nikki.

I covered a hand over my mouth to stop myself from throwing up and leant back against a tree, sliding down till I sat on the grass. Nikki had coerced him. Oh my god, this was so fucking wrong. He was going to have sex with her for me. For us. Fuck. It was vile. How she could do that to him, it was insanely disgusting.

Everything in me became weak and sick. Was he really going to do that? Did he go back and do it afterwards? He couldn't have. No. Please tell me he didn't. The tears kept coming.

"Sienna?" a voice called me out and I lifted my head to look up and seen none other than Leah in front of me. She was holding a leash with a golden puppy on the end. Great. Perfect timing.

"What the hell do you want?" I quickly wiped all the tears away and bitterly remarked.

"Well, you're kind of crying and I wanted to make sure you're okay." She said.

"Well, I'm fine now you can kindly fuck off."

She frowned and then reached in her pocket for something. She held out a tissue for me and at first, I refused to take it. "It's just a tissue. Not a peace treaty." She explained and, swallowing my pride, I took it.

Before I knew it, however, the little puppy on her leash jumped up and nuzzled into my lap. I jerked back at the surprise but somehow found it comforting. "Archie!" she exclaimed and bent down to grab him. She gently lifted him from my lap and held him to her chest.

"Sorry," she cringed. "My dad got a new dog and we've been trying to train him these past few weeks, but he's just so excited to meet everyone. Aren't you, boy?" she chuckled and petted his head. Archie's little tail wagged, and he barked happily. I couldn't help but laugh.

"It's okay." I assured.

"Are you sure you're okay? I mean, I'm not feeling the best at the moment either and I'm probably not the company you want but if you want to talk..."

"Because of Adam." I assumed without thinking.

Leah turned to me, eyes widened and expression confused. "Huh?"

"You and Adam." I clarified. "You're not together anymore."

"Oh." She looked down at the floor, sadness creeping in. "Um, no. We... We aren't." she frowned.

I huffed, "I guess if you want to talk, maybe talking about your issues could make me forget about mine." I said it without any thought, it was more in a sarcastic way but she must've taken it seriously as she sat down next to me and began.

"I'm adopted, you know." That took me by surprise. I didn't take Leah for being adopted but, then again, there wasn't really a stereotype for it. I guess I always took her as coming from your picture-perfect suburban family, and she was the perfect girl-next-door.

"Oh," I said out of surprise. "I didn't know that."

"You would've when you'd have seen the fact that I have two dads." Fair point. "Anyways," she sighed and continued. "I guess I've always felt out of touch with myself, and with my dads. In reality, I guess I always had that longing for a mom. Don't get me wrong, my parents are the most amazing you can get and I'm extremely lucky to have them but... I don't know, I also wanted to know where I came from, if it'd make more sense to me."

"So then what?" I turned my head to her and asked.

"I always pictured my mom to be exactly like me. The only thing I had left of her was this necklace and I wore it everyday because, in my eyes, she was the perfect woman." She looked down at her dog Archie in her lap and gave out a little sigh. "I told Adam about all of this, and he encouraged me to go find her. My dads weren't... enthusiastic about the idea but we still went away." That sounded like Adam. Always with the spontaneity.

"Where was she?" I asked curiously.

"Downtown Chicago. We booked a motel for a few days, and we managed to find her address. As soon as we pulled up to the place Adam said we should've turned back but I didn't listen. Instead, I knocked on the door and waited. When she opened the door, I didn't know what to think."

I furrowed my brows, "What d'you mean?"

"Well, turns out she's a heroin addict who's in a very sexual relationship with her dealer." Jesus. That was probably a shock. "Yeah," Leah sighed knowing what I was thinking. "As soon as Adam saw her, he told me to turn back but I stupidly went inside and met her dealer and all her druggie friends."

"What happened?" I had a feeling there was something more and, in a sense, I didn't want to ask too much but, in another, I was too curious for my own good.

"She got too drunk, tried to pressure me into doing cocaine, and when I refused, she went on a rampage about how she never wanted me and that I completely ruined her life and that I was going to end up just like her." God, I couldn't imagine that. I saw the tears in Leah's eyes as she said it and even though so much animosity and dislike simmered between us, I still couldn't help but feel bad for her. No one deserved that.

"I... I tried to ignore her but that was what she kept saying. No one wanted me. I was going to end up just like her. What didn't help as well was that I look like her. every single detail on her face and body matched mine. I was in tears when I got back to the motel and couldn't even look myself in the mirror because every time I saw my reflection, it was of her." a tear fell down her cheek. I really did feel horrible.

"What happened after that?" I asked softly.

"I couldn't stop myself from seeing it. Everywhere I looked it just seemed like I was going down her same path. One night it got too much, and I completely panicked – like was on the verge of a mental breakdown, and I went straight to Adam's. Taylor was there and I was so freaked I couldn't even think straight. Then Taylor started talking about some stupid, fake rumours getting me even more stressed out, him and Adam got in an argument, and then he left. Then I felt even worse."

I remembered what she was talking about because Taylor had relayed the situation to Rya and I ages ago. At least it was good to know Leah wasn't acting like a bitch that day for no reason but something else caught my attention.

"Stupid, fake rumours? You mean the ones you made up about Rya having herpes and Taylor and I sleeping together?" I didn't let the coldness slip my tone.

She turned to me with confusion written all over her face. "What?"

"Oh, don't play dumb, Leah. I know you fucking did it."

"Um, no. You told the whole of the cheer squad I brushed my teeth with mayonnaise and have Lord of The Rings sexual fantasies."

I literally froze. What the fuck? What kind of game was she playing? "Um, no. What the fuck?"

"No! It all makes sense because then you threw photocopies of my diary all around the school!" she pointed a finger at me.

"That's because you literally talked about drugging Adam with a love potion and then broke us up!" I snapped back.

"What?!" she chuckled angrily. "First of all, who drugs someone with a 'love potion', isn't that literally illegal? And second of all, I wrote that diary when I was eleven, how could I have broken you guys up? I swear you guys didn't start dating till like Sophomore Year!"

"It's literally in your diary!" I exclaimed. "Leah, stop shitting me and just be honest." I huffed.

She narrowed her eyes and cocked her head to the side, "D'you have any photos of my diary?"

I nodded briefly and pulled out my phone, finding the pictures of it. Reaching over to show her the images, she let out a long sigh. "Those aren't my entries." What?

"What?"

"All of these weird entries start on the left side of the page; I only start my entries on the right."

"Why?"

"Because my entries always finish on the left. Plus, it looks aesthetic. But that handwriting isn't even mine. My slants to the left, this slants to the right and who the hell dots their 'i''s like that? It's like a little swirl." Was she saying what I thought she was saying? No, it couldn't be.

"But you planted this by Rya's locker."

"No, I brought the wrong diary to school one day and then lost it, only to find it a few days later but blasted all around school."

"Who the hell would do this then? I mean, what kind of person would do that?" it didn't make sense. Why would someone steal