The next week passed in a blur. Logan was out most of the time so I spent the majority of the days with my sister. Our dad's trial had officially started and I had decided to let the mafia and Logan decide my father's fate. I didn't want to get involved at all. I knew no matter the outcome, I'd always wonder if I made the right decision. I felt as though I was being forced to choose between not only, my two parents – either I choose my father's life or I avenge my mother's death – but I was also choosing between protecting my father or protecting my future family from him.

It was too much for me to deal with and I wanted nothing to do with it. Ashley and I didn't speak about the trail although I know it was on her mind as much as it was on mine. She was having a hard time coming to terms with the idea that we may soon lose him. I knew she didn't approve of that choice and Logan had told her to speak up if she wanted him to spare him but she seemed equally as torn as me.

Everything was a mess.

I loved my mother with all my heart. She was an incredible mother, a kind, loving woman who was devoted to her family. Despite the horrors of my father's lifestyle, she thought life was beautiful, that people were good. She raised us to be strong, to treat people right and appreciate everything. I was plagued with the thought of her final moments. She must've been so scared, felt so alone as the man she loved ended her life far too soon.

Ashley sat beside me, searching the tv for something to watch. Logan had already left before I woke up this morning and when I went downstairs, Ashley was eating her breakfast. The whole house felt quiet and tense when Logan was gone. Half of the soldiers had gone with him and it was clear the rest of the men were on edge, preparing for the worst always. The news of my pregnancy had spread quickly. I was carrying the heir to the mafia and my name was suddenly the topic of every conversation amongst the made men. It made me uncomfortable to have them all staring at me, watching my every move, so my sister and I had run off to the cinema room.

"Ooo, lets watch a Christmas movie," she said excitedly, finding a few options.

I rose an eyebrow. "Isn't it a bit early for Christmas?" I asked her. It was my favourite time of the year but I made a point of only celebrating through December. Any earlier and it diminished the excitement and the build up in my opinion.

"It's December fifteenth," she answered and my eyes bulged.

"What?"

I thought of how many weeks had passed since I left my home in the autumn. It had been so long and so much had changed and I'd managed to completely lose track of the time. "I can't believe it's almost Christmas," I said, my eyes dotting with tears – I'd been particularly emotional recently and was blaming it completely on pregnancy hormones. "The build up is my favourite part."

My sister sent me a sympathetic smile. "Don't worry, Mi, there's still time. Maybe we could put up the decorations today and then watch a film later?" she suggested.

I swallowed the lump in the back of my throat and forced a laugh. "I don't know why I'm getting so upset," I muttered when a tear fell. "I just... it would be nice to do something normal."

She nodded and squeezed my hand. "Call Logan and ask him where the decorations are, this place is too massive to look for them ourselves," she said with a laugh.

I nodded, squeezing her hand back before pulling my phone from my pocket. I dialled Logan's number and it took him a while to answer but when he did, I could hear the smile in his voice. "Hi darling, everything okay?"

I could feel emotion in the back of my throat from the sound of his voice alone. "Hey," I forced out, "everything's fine," I told him, although I doubted I was very convincing, "I was just wondering where you keep the Christmas decorations. Ash and I thought we'd decorate."

"That's a great idea, baby, but I don't have any decorations."

I frowned. "Why not?"

He chuckled and the sound made my stomach dip. "I don't usually bother with Christmas," he answered and my frown deepened before he continued. "I'll send someone to get whatever you need, text me a list, okay?"

I smiled and thanked him before Ashley and I started working on a long list of Christmassy items, from a tree to every colour of tinsel. I didn't ask Logan what he was doing when I text him the list. I didn't want to know because he was with my father.

About an hour later, several of Logan's men came through the front door with bags and boxes tucked under their arms. I tried my hide my smirk at the looks on their faces – they didn't look impressed. Behind them, a group of men carried an enormous Christmas tree, struggling to get it through the double doors.

My eyes widened and I watched as they stumbled inside and then tried to stand it up in the foyer. The top brushed the high ceiling and it made the large, open foyer feel a lot smaller. I watched as they dragged it around, trying to conceal my laughter before Fiona entered the room. "Miss?" she called, "Tea? Good for the pregnant belly."

I smiled and thanked her. She'd been so excited when Logan had told her I was pregnant. He had done all his research and wanted to make sure I didn't eat or drink anything that was bad for me. Fiona had ignored all his instructions, reminding him that she was a mother herself and knew more about pregnancy than him before throwing her arms around me. The action had caught me by surprise, but I noticed Logan smile a little before he turned away. I knew Fiona was the closest thing he had to family and it was clear that she cared about him and, although he wouldn't ever admit it, he clearly cared about her too.

"Thank you, Fiona," I said with a smile. She turned to leave but I stopped her. "Please stay and help us decorate," I asked her, looking behind her to the rest of the maids. "We could use the help."

They were reluctant at first but soon, we were all wrapping tinsel around the stair railings and draping twinkly light from the balcony. Christmas music blasted from the speakers around the house and I danced and laughed with my sister, wrapping myself up in tinsel and crying with laughter when the Christmas tree fell onto Gavin.

I forgot about everything else for the afternoon and just enjoyed myself. Ashley and I watched Christmas movies for the rest of the evening, surrounded by sparkling lights. The sun had long set when we left the cinema room and I left my sister to go in search of Logan. I checked the office, almost rolling my eyes as I pushed the door open. He lived for his work, spending all day every day in his office - which is why I was surprised to find it empty.

I frowned and turned to make my way down the hallway. Gavin smiled at me from outside my door – like always – and I grinned back. "Is Logan back yet?" I asked him and he nodded.

"Yeah, he's not long gotten back."

"Where is he?"

He gestured further down the hallway towards one of the spare bedrooms and I frowned, shuffling towards the door. I had no idea why he would be in there but as I approached, I heard him talking. I moved to open the door and froze when I heard another voice. A woman's voice.

"Oh my god," I muttered, my eyes widening when I heard the woman again. "Who's in there?" I asked, turning to Gavin as my tears started to fall. He shrugged softly, his eyes filled with sympathy and my stomach sank. He'd brought a woman back. He was in the bedroom with a woman. I couldn't stop the sob that burst out of me at the thought.

I started to walk away but I didn't know where to go. I was in his house. "Mia," Gavin called as I passed him, my heart breaking in my chest. I kept my eyes down, avoiding the gazes of all the curious guards and only stopped when I heard a door behind me swing open.

I turned, my eyes landing on Logan as he stepped out into the hallway, and I sneered at him. "Stay away from me," I snapped, turning and making my way to his bedroom. I wanted to get out of his clothes and then out of his house. That was all I could think about.

I stormed off, ignoring as he called after me, and slammed the door shut behind me. I ripped off his hoodie and found one of my t-shirts in the closet. It barely fit anymore, unable to cover the large bulge in my stomach that made me cry harder. I couldn't get away from Logan. I was pregnant with his children and that wouldn't change.

I fell to the floor just as he stepped into the room. My chest ached and my head throbbed as I cried and cried, feeling completely distraught. I truly believed that he loved me and I didn't know how he could do this to me.

"Mia," he called softly.

"Get out!" I hissed, glaring up at him. "Just get out!"

He shook his head and stepped closer. "Why are you so upset?" he asked.

I scoffed. "Maybe it has something to do with the woman you brought home and took into the bedroom!" I yelled, staring up at him through my tears and waiting for him to try and deny it or justify it.

Instead, he shook his head. "Mia, darling its not like that." He stepped closer again and crouched in front of me. "I promise you," he said and I shook my head.

"I don't believe you," I told him. "What possible reason could you have for bringing a woman back and being alone with her in a bedroom?"

He reached for my chin and, as much as I wanted to pull away, I didn't. His skin was warm against mine and he swiped away my tears. "I love you," he said, his tone filled with conviction. "I only want you and I promise you, there's an explanation."

I sniffed. "Then tell me."

"Just come with me and it will all make sense." He held a hand out and I took it, letting him pull me up. I didn't want to cave that easily but the look in his eye made me believe there was more to the story. He'd been so good to me, so loyal and caring and supportive through everything. I wanted to trust that he wouldn't hurt me.

I nodded my head and wiped my tears, deciding I should at least hear him out. I followed behind him as he headed back to the room. Before we reached it, he knocked on the door to the room opposite where my sister had been sleeping. I frowned in confusion when he asked her to come with us before he turned to where the woman was. I felt my stomach sink. Whoever he was with, I only hoped there was an explanation. I wanted to believe there was. I wanted to believe that he wouldn't hurt me.

"Hey," he called, clearly picking up on my worry. He reached out gently and cupped my face so he was looking into my eyes. "I love you," he told me.

I wanted to say it back but I stopped myself, simply nodding before he opened the door. I took a long, steady breath before stepping in. I scanned the room, my eyes landing on the woman staring back at me. It felt like my heart jumped from my chest and smashed across the floor when I met her eyes. My own filled with tears and the breath caught in my throat. "Mom?"