Chapter 6

 They all spent the next few hours at the shooting range and every time Jade picked up the gun and fired the men stopped and watch mesmerised at the way she moved and the way she handled a gun.

After a few hours, Jade muscles tensed up and even though she was trained to fight through the cramps and aches her injuries caused her to stop with the throbbing pain in her lower back and shoulders.

Jade got up, and the men were so focused that they didn't notice until they saw her sitting outside the range watching them shoot.

"Hey, you done for the day?" Dylan asked as he sat down next to her.

"Yeah, the back is causing me some pain." Jade rubbed her lower back, wishing she didn't spend so long looking down the end of a scope.

"Yeah, injuries tend to put a hold on things." They both sat in silence and Jade could feel him watching her trying to work out where she fits into everything.

"I know what you are thinking and no I am not telling you where I work or what happened." Jade looked straight ahead keeping on her blank mask that she perfected over the last few months since coming back.

"I wasn't going to ask Jade. Not everyone is your enemy." Dylan got up leaving Jade with that thought. She knew this, but she found it easier to shut people out than, she didn't have to worry about letting them in. Whenever she seemed to let people in, every time she ended up hurt, so she found it much easier to shut people out.

She rubbed her bare ring finger, which was a consist reminder of why she didn't let people into her personal life anymore. Rolling her shoulders back she eased the ache that was growing between her shoulder blades from staying in the same position for a long period.

She watched the guys for about another hour and before they all headed out for some lunch. Getting into the car Jade sat back and listened to the men talk with a small smile on her face as they shared memories with each other while joking around.

When they pulled up at the fast-food joint, it seemed like they forgot Jade was with them as they all rushed in leaving Jade alone to get out of the car.

Once her feet touched the ground she reached in grabbing her crutches and hobbled her way inside where they guys were already sitting in a booth making a hell of a lot of noise.

"Thanks for waiting," Jade said as she got close and all the guys stopped what they were doing and looked up at her.

"Marcus, I thought you were staying with Jade?" Roger asked and Marcus shrugged his shoulders as Jade sat down on the end of the seat having hardly any room with the large men filling up most of the space.

Considering they already ordered food without her Jade called over a waitress who took her order and went away but not before flirting with the men at the table.

"So, Jade, how are you feeling about being out of the house?" James asked, and she didn't want to admit it, but it felt good to leave the house, even if she was still slightly paranoid that someone would attack at any chance given.

"It is ok, I guess." She shrugged her shoulders and could feel Marcus's eyes drilling into the side of her head. She ignored him and focused on casing out the fast-food joint. Jade was so out of it that she didn't notice that the food had arrived until she felt a kick under the table.

"Jade, you ok?" Marco asked, and she nodded her head knowing there was nothing she could do.

"Yeah, I am good." She knew no one believed her so she kept her head down and began to eat the crap in front of her. As they all ate lunch Jade sat back and listened not caring that she wasn't involved as it gave her time to think which wasn't always a good thing for her.

She found her thoughts drifting away with her and the men picked up on it when her body began to shake as her mind went to the dark places she tried to keep out of.

Jade felt her body tense up as sweat rolled down her forehead as she tried to repress the memories she struggled so hard to forget. She felt when her mind shut down and she let herself be taken over to the darkness knowing there was nothing else she could do.

Marcus watched as Jade fainted and caught her before she fell out of her seat. He looked at his team who was already getting into action, paying the bill and making their way out of the fast-food joint.

None of them knew what happened. One-minute Jade was fine and the next her body shook, as sweat rolled down her face before her eyes went blank and she passed out. Marcus carried Jade out to the car where he sat her in his lap in the back seat as they drove back to their place in silence.

"We will get Jade some food later on." His twin stated, and he nodded his head as his attention was focused on Jade who was resting peacefully in his lap. Marcus reached forward and brushed her brown hair off her face running his fingers along her smooth cheek wondering what was troubling her so much.

Marco watched his brothers softer side come out wishing he could be like that all the time. When they pulled up at their apartments. Marco and Marcus said goodbye to the guys and took Jade up to her apartment where they put her to bed before they made their way to her lounge room where they both collapsed onto the couch.

"Marcus," Marco said and Marcus gave his brother a look before standing up again.

"Don't start brother. I am not in the mood for another lecture. If you want to find me I am at the gym." Marco sighed and watched as his brother walked away leaving him alone to his own thoughts.

It was some hours later when Jade got up confused about why she was in her bedroom. The last thing she remembered was eating at the restaurant and from there everything was blank. Deciding that she would need to talk to the brothers she got out of bed and was surprised when she walked into her kitchen to see Marco at her stove cooking food.

"Um, what are you doing here?" She cleared her throat and Marco turned around with a bright smile before turning his attention back to the food he was preparing. Jade walked to her kitchen counter and sat down while Marco continued to cook the food while humming softly to himself.

"You should eat Jade," Marco said when he finished and placed a plate of food in front of Jade. Jade ate a few mouthfuls and groaned in delight at how amazing the food tasted considering she hadn't eaten in a few days.

"This is superb," Jade said as she stuffed more food in her mouth knowing if she continued at this rate she would give herself a stomach ache.

"You should slow down. The food isn't going anywhere." Jade nodded and slowed down her chewing and started to eat like a normal person.

"So, what happened?" Jade asked when she was almost finished and she saw Marco shift uncomfortably.

"You fainted at the fast-food joint. One minute you were fine and the next you passed out." Jade frowned wondering what caused her to faint. She used to have blackouts frequently during the first few weeks of recovery, but they told her that had passed.

"Do you remember what caused you to faint?" Jade shrugged her shoulders as the harder she tried to think the more her brain hurt trying to think.

"No, I can't." Jade finished up her food and offered Marco coffee who politely declined.

"No, I better head home." Jade walked Marco to the door and for some reason felt a huge weight lift off her shoulders when he left her place. Looking at the time Jade realised she had an appointment with the psychologist in half an hour. Sighing Jade got dressed before wandering out of her apartment to the appointment that she really wasn't in the mood to go to.

When the taxi pulled up to the building Jade was running about 10 minutes late not that she really cared because this was the last place she wanted to be today. When she walked inside, she wasn't surprised that she was taken straight into the room where Helen was waiting. Jade took a seat as Helen smiled at her.

"Hello, Jade. How has your week been?" Helen questioned and Jade shrugged her shoulders. 

"Pretty shitty, but I'm here so that counts for something right." Helen hummed and smiled at Jade. 

"Would you like to talk about what made you have such a bad week?" Helen questioned said and watched her body language as she ran her hands through her hair. 

"My mother came around this week which set off a series of shitty events to follow." Jade shrugged her shoulders and rested her forearms on her legs. 

"How did seeing your mother make you feel? Last week you mentioned you and your mother have a strained relationship." Jade leaned back in her chair and looked around the room. 

"I don't know, I mean I tolerate her most days. I have gotten used to blocking out a lot of the nonsense she says. She said some things I may have made a comment, and she slapped me across the face which set off a flashback." Jade shrugged and Helen noticed how her posture changed when she spoke about her mother. They talked back and forth about some triggers and coping strategies for when these flashbacks occurred and talked about how these flashbacks left Jade feeling paranoid about everything. 

"It is very common for people who suffer PTSD to feel like the world is out to get them, but you have to remember that there are also people who want to help you." Jade nodded her head and smiled at Helen. 

"So we still have some time left. I know we have talked a lot of coping strategies today. Last week I said I wanted to talk a bit about your family." Helen waited until Jade said it was okay to talk about the subject and when Jade nodded her head Helen smiled. 

"Okay, so last week you mentioned your brother left when he was 21. Why do you think he left?" 

"He left because our mother hates us. She is a controlling bitch and if it isn't her way, then there is no way." Jade clenched her fist as she thought of all the ways her mother manipulated her when she was younger to be the perfect daughter to society. She had tried repeatedly to be the perfect daughter, but she wasn't, and her mother punished her for that. 

"So your mother pushed him away. How old were you when you moved away from your mother?" Jade sighed and crossed her legs again. 

"It was when I joined the army straight out of school at 18.  My mother was suffocating me, she had been for years so when the opportunity came up to leave I took it and never looked back." Helen nodded as she started to get to understand a bit more about Jade as a person. 

"Okay, I have just one more question before we finish up today. If given the chance to redo your decision to join the army at such a young age, would you still do it." Jade had thought about this many time during your young adult life and she always came to the same conclusion. 

"Honestly, I am not sure. If my childhood and my mother was different, then maybe I might have chosen a different path. If my childhood was to stay the same, then no I don't think I would make a different decision. My life was miserable when living with my mother and I just wanted to live my own life without her controlling it." She shrugged her shoulders and Helen nodded with a smile. 

"Well, it seems time is up for today. Shall I see you next week same time?" Helen asked and Jade agreed and booked an appointment with the receptionist.

 On her way home she thought about her mother and hated how even to this day her mother still influenced the way she acted because no matter how hard she tried to break free from her mother she was always still lingering around, like a bad smell that won't go away.

When Jade arrived at her apartment, she paid the cabbie and made her way inside where she ran into the one and only arrogant sergeant.

"Jade wonderful to see you outside." Jade not being in the mood to deal with his smugness today barged past him almost toppling over as she tripped on the small step that she missed. Straightening herself up she continued her way up to her apartment hoping she wouldn't have to interact with the bastard from next door. 

"Jade wait up," Marcus called out quickly jumping into the elevator before it closed trapping Jade inside the closed space with the last person she wanted to see today.

Jade moved towards the back of the elevator and just her luck that Marcus followed her. Trying her best to ignore the beast standing beside her she kept her gaze straight forward. However, that didn't stop her eyes every once in a while, drift over to the god-like figure standing beside her.

The elevator crunched and churned and Jade prayed that the stupid thing didn't break down on her leaving her trapped in the small space with Marcus.

"I hope the elevator doesn't break down," Marcus said just as the elevator ground to a complete halt.

"Fuck this," Jade muttered under her breath as she tried to hit the buttons on the elevator willing it to work just a little longer until she reached her floor or any floor for that matter.

"You have got to be kidding me." Jade huffed crossing her arms as the elevator didn't move. Furious she turned around and faced the smug looking sergeant.

"Well looks like we are stuck in here together kitten."