39. Lost

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Roger walked alongside the waitress, his eyes fixed ahead of him as he listened to the sound of her heels clicking on the brick path as he walked her home. It was mostly silent between them, but Roger didn't mind much. The street lamps were still out so along with the silence came darkness. Roger was used to it, though. The waitress walked next to him, her cries had stopped and she seemed more relaxed. Roger stole a look over at her and saw her staring ahead of herself, eyes darting around in the dark. He looked away.

"Well, my home is over there," She pointed to a building a few feet away, turning back to Roger and adding, "Thanks for walking me home."

Roger nodded, running his hand through his brown hair as he replied softly, "No problem." Roger waved, turning and beginning to walk away when he heard her voice again.

"Wait."

He turned around, spotting her figure in the darkness.

"Why did you do that? Really?" She questioned, stepping forward and looking up at him, the blue eyes that hid behind the curls very curious and confused as she waited for an answer.

Roger sighed, looking away as he murmured, "I've had to watch my own sisters get hurt. It pains me whenever I see someone else hurt." It was the truth, he reasoned with himself. A small flame of anger ignited inside of him as he thought about it.

"You were at the bar though. Why?" She pushed. Roger met her gaze, placing his hands on his waist.

"Sometimes a drink is the only way to heal a broken heart." He said in a matter of fact tone. "I needed to get away from reality. It didn't work, though."

He could barely see her nodding in the shadows, the small glimpses of the moonlight the only thing that lit the city around them. "I understand." She said slowly. "But, I want to thank you for what you did back there. I think i'm going to stop working there." She began to take off his coat. "Here."

"That's a good choice to make, and no, keep it. I don't need it." He replied simply. He stepped away, nodding. "Well, see you around." He turned away, hearing her as she walked off.

"Thank you." He heard her say as her footsteps faded.

Relief filled his heart and he set off, feeling a small glimmer of joy as he had the satisfaction of helping another person. It was good to feel something that made him want to smile. Roger walked swiftly, heading in the direction of the barracks. He would find Freya and Axel. He would accept them as they were. A small part of his mind wanted to know if he would be with Freya if only she hadn't found Axel. If she hadn't found Axel, would there have been a chance between them? He doubted it. But, it didn't matter now. He knew that she was with Axel now. He knew Axel would take care of her. Probably better than he ever could.

The sound of distant yelling echoed through the empty streets as he grew closer to the barracks. The sounds of loud, wailing sirens could also be heard as he continued, the noise blasting from distant speakers. He looked around, not seeing anyone, but hearing the yells of men that came from the direction of the barracks.

Anxious, he kept walking, wondering what was going on. Scenarios played in his head but he couldn't figure out what could be happening. Maybe it was a drill at the barracks. Maybe not.

Suddenly he could see tall figures in the darkness, running at him. Roger froze, staring as the shapes moved closer. He could see they were soldiers as they approached him, the sirens hiding the sound of their footsteps.

"Sir!" One of the soldiers walked up to him. Roger blinked, letting the soldier continue. "There have been bombers spotted, I advise you to evacuate the area!" He said, continuing past Roger as he and the other men continued running, entering buildings to alert the others who lived here.

Roger paused, the information sinking into his head as he thought about what the man had said. Bombers? Here? When? Roger blinked, turning toward around. The cold wind of the beginning of fall ruffled his hair and touched his skin, making him shudder as he looked up, seeing the stars and the moon. No. Another thought jumped in his head.

Freya. She was still out here, she may not know about the bombers. Axel too.

Taking a deep breath, he began walking forward, looking to his right and seeing a bunch of soldiers carrying flashlights as they ran through the streets. Roger decided to run, pushing himself into a jog as he made his way toward the dance. He could see the light of the light bulbs as he ran into the street, looking around at the clueless people. His eyes scanned the faces, not recognizing Freya or Axel. What did they do? Run off together?

He sighed, running away and past the dance, people staring at him as he sped by. He needed to find them. He needed to find Freya. The sounds of the sirens caught up with him as they spread throughout the whole city, blaring in his ears as people began running away, exiting buildings, getting into cars and driving. He stuck to the sidewalk as he dodged around the few people who had the sense to evacuate. Roger slowed to a jog, his hazel eyes wide as fear took over. What would happen if he didn't find them? They would most likely get a warning, but what if they didn't? What if they didn't evacuate and the bombers hit them?

Sirens combined with the voices of other people as Roger walked, his eyes open as he tried to spot the two in the darkness of the night, the moonlight and the glare of flashlights the only thing here to help him. Roger felt a sense of hopelessness inside of himself as he looked around, not seeing them.

He then saw a brighter light and he turned, watching cars drive by, headlights shining through the shadows as people drove away. He breathed in and out, unsure of how to find them as he walked alongside the road, clueless of where they were. What was Axel thinking? Roger bet it was his idea to run off somewhere. He was going to kill Axel, if it meant it would kill him. But, maybe Axel had heard, and he had gotten Freya away, not knowing where Roger was. If that was the case, then Roger would be thankful. But still angry.

He kept walking, his eyes scanning faces in desperation as people ran around him, carrying items or holding their children and loved ones. Roger also hoped the waitress would be okay, she probably had been warned. He just didn't know if Freya and Axel had been, and the thought pushed him to continue looking. He walked faster, searching.

"Roger?!"

He spun around, seeing a shadow approaching. The shadow grew closer and he recognized Freya. Thank goodness.

"There you are! You are so stupid, why did you go away? Come on, we need to leave!" He gasped, relief pouring over him like water as he looked down into her panicked eyes. He then paused, lifting his gaze and looking around, not seeing the familiar green ones that belonged to Axel. "Where is he?" Roger asked, looking back at Freya.

She blinked, looking around as she brushed her loose hair behind her ears, replying, "I don't know. He went back to the barracks. To find you!" She looked back up, fear in her eyes. "He said to stay here and wait for him. Did you hear about the bombers-"

"Yes, I heard." He interrupted, eyes wide. "When did he leave? I can catch up to him." He said quickly, concern in his eyes. They both froze as suddenly there was a low rumbling.

Both of them looked up, expecting bombers to be over their heads. None were yet. But the rumbling that came from the sky came from them, they were almost here. He heard Freya gasp and he looked down, seeing tears in her eyes as she looked around.

"We need to find my grandparents too! Before the bombers come!" Freya cried, looking up at Roger as she turned. Roger was taken aback, remembering that she didn't know her grandparents were gone yet. She had no clue.

"F-Freya..." He began weakly. He was going to be the one to tell her. To break her. To watch her fall. She faced him, staring in a panicked state as she absorbed his gaze, stepping closer until she was only a few feet away, staring up in confusion.

Roger thought of a gentle way to explain, but the words sounded hard either way. He looked into her eyes, feeling himself split as he predicted the amount of pain that would be inflicted upon her.

"Freya, they aren't here." He said stiffly, not breaking from her eyes.

She blinked, "What do you mean. They are probably home but we need to warn them somehow."

"No, Freya. They didn't make it through the first bombing." He finished weakly, looking down as he heard a muffled gasp.

"You're lying, Roger." She said stiffly, her voice cracking. "You're lying, aren't you?!" She pushed him with her hands, a sob breaking from her as he stepped back. "They aren't gone, tell me they aren't!" She stepped toward him, glaring up at him while her eyes filled with confusion.

"I received the letter, and I," he paused, looking away as he felt his chest tighten, his eyes averted from the girl he had known almost his whole life. Of course, he was the one who had to tell her this. He felt his throat tighten as he blinked, looking back down at her.

"I'm sorry, Freya." His voice was higher as he choked the words out, the emotions he had been bottling up spilling out and overflowing.

She stared at him, realization in her eyes as she understood he wasn't lying. Stunned, she raised her hands to her mouth, eyes lowering as tears filled them, her knees buckling as she began to fall, sobs escaping from her lips. Roger ducked down, catching her before she hit the ground and pulling her up, burying her in his chest as he felt her body shake, the tears soaking through his shirt as he held her. he felt his eyes watering as he looked straight ahead, unable to feel what she felt. He had already lost everything he had wanted. His family to a man who enjoyed watching others suffer. His father to the war. His friends father as well. And his friend to another man. His friend, who he cared deeply for. Who he loved.

And because he loved her, he knew that he needed to find Axel.

Freya clung to him, her arms around him as he slowly pulled away.

"I need to find Axel. Please get to safety, we will find you. I promise." Roger said softly, bending so he was her height. She shook her head, fear of losing another person in her eyes.

"No, you can't, what if you-"

"I'll be okay. Trust me." Roger reassured her, "But you need to get to safety, okay?" She nodded.

He leaned forward, whispering in her ear, "Stay safe, okay? I promise I'll find him. I'll get him back to you. I know you love him, okay mate?" He then gently kissed her forehead, leaving his lips there for a moment before stepping around her.

He looked back, seeing her staring after him, devastated.

He began running back toward the barracks as the sirens grew louder, lights in the sky as the bombers arrived.

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