Kaiden

I blink, registering his words.

"I love you, Kaiden."

The earth is still spinning and the sun is shining but I feel as if time has stopped.

"I don't ever want to lose you. I can't promise I'll not push you away whenever I get anxious but I promise I will always come back to you, like you do for me. I love you, Kaiden Pierce. So much. I'm sorry it took me so long to finally realise it."

I don't even know what to say. The dragons have disappeared, it's a strange kind of calm.

Like how they show in movies, the ringing silence after a battle when the good guys are victorious.

I have been trying to move on from him for a whole month and... I realise that I have miserably failed.

Sam, Vanessa - nobody managed to distract me from the fact that my heart belongs to this curly haired boy - who finally admitted that he likes me.

To himself, and to me.

"Could you say something?" He asks in a small voice.

There's nothing to say anymore.

I grab his face and kiss him, unable to form a coherent thought, sighing into the warmth of his lips against mine.

I've waited for this moment since the summer and... now finally, finally I've got it. There's no better feeling.

His lips move against mine slowly. It's the kind of kiss that inspires stars to climb into the sky and light up the world. The kind that takes forever and no time at all.

He pulls me closer, his hands around my waist, making happy little sparks run across my entire body. I straddle him, my hands going to his hair, the electric feeling traveling right down to my toes.

He bites my bottom lip, tasting like mint and coffee, his heady scent enveloping me. He pulls me closer and kisses me again, deeper, faster until we're both starved of breath.

I pull away and kiss his nose, then his chin and then his Adam's apple and his collarbone. He moans, interlocking his fingers with mine.

It's terrifying to acknowledge that he could break me if he ever left but I wouldn't even mind that because at least I was with him.

He cups my face, smiling dreamily, resting his forehead against mine. I close my eyes, vaguely aware we're in my room.

This is real. We're here. He's here. I just kissed the person I've been dreaming about for half a year. A real kiss, without any inhibition. I am half expecting him to disappear the minute I open my eyes.

I can't believe he's here, he's mine.

"Kai.." He whispers.

I open my eyes, meeting his chocolate irises. He is still here and my stomach does a somersault.

"I'm scared..."

"Of?"

"This. Us. I'm scared that one day you're going to wake up and not... like me anymore. You're going to get sick of my need for constant reassurances and me pushing you away and the... anxiety. Most of all, I'm scared... that you're going to see me the way I see myself."

Oh.

I don't know what to say so I kiss him again, trying to convey everything I feel. It's soft and gentle and the Chernobyl in my head is back. I pull away and kiss his forehead.

"No, Nathan, I'm going to make you see yourself, the way I see you," I whisper against his hair.

I grin suddenly, dizzy from the ecstatic rush. He pulls me into a hug, resting his chin on my shoulder. I kiss his neck.

"I love you," he whispers.

I know he can hear my heart galloping like a fucking racehorse, against his own. My face is hotter than the sun right now.

This is unbelievable.

"I love you Kaiden Pierce. I'm sorry I was a dick to you."

All I can do is smile. My cheeks are aching with how wide my smile is. I leave his lap and stand, feeling the urge to fan my face.

I'm literally speechless. 

"You've gone bright red by the way. You look adorable," He laughs and pulls me in his arms again, making my heart go nuts and my body feel like mush.

I savour the feeling of him against me, as he is spinning around slowly. He kisses my collarbone.

I want to commit this moment to memory, etch it into my very soul, so that when I am about to die and I have the seven minutes of brain activity left, this is the very first thing I see.

My heart is happy but also at peace.

"You're awfully quiet," He says after a while.

"I want to go to the balcony and scream to the entire fucking world," I whisper, finding my voice, lacing our fingers together. "I feel like I'm in a dream, a beautiful beautiful dream. I'm so lucky."

"I'm the lucky one Kai. There's no way I can even begin to tell you that."

He cups my face and kisses me again. It gets heated in no time. He angles my head to deepen the kiss and I feel my knees turn to jelly.

I can never tire of kissing him.

We spring apart, startled by the loud ring of his phone. A flustered laugh escapes us.

"You should... get that," I mumble, looking at the floor.

I am so giddy right now.

He answers it, wincing at his mum's loud tone.

"It's with me," he says. "Yeah, Mum, I'm sorry I'll be right there."

He hangs up.

"Gotta go, I stole my mom's car from her workplace and now she's freaking out, I have to return it."

I laugh. He pecks my lips again.

"See you tomorrow?" He asks. I nod.

"Drive safe."

"I will! I love you!" He says and runs downstairs, leaving me alone.

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

I place my hands on my cheeks and let out a shriek.

Nathan....is mine. I'm never getting used to this feeling.

******

Benji is mewing ceaselessly. The radium hands of my clock show me it's 1 am.

"What is it?" I mutter, rubbing my eyes. He is looking towards my balcony.

A silhouette of a person is against my curtains.

All my sleep vanishes. I hold my breath and grab the nearest object I can find, a paintbrush with a wooden handle.

The latch to my balcony door clicks and I quickly turn on the lamp, getting out of bed. I yell and jump on the person, who screams loudly, falling on the ground.

"Get the hell out of my house!" I shout, about to jab the brush in the person.

"Kaiden! Kaiden - Kai it's me!"

I realise I'm sitting on Nathan's torso and he's holding my wrists, the paintbrush a few centimetres away from his eye. I exhale heavily, frowning.

Fuck!!!

"What the fuck, Nathan?!" I snap, getting up. "You scared the shit out of me! I almost took your fucking eye out!"

He laughs and stands up. Before I can open my mouth to say anything, he pushes me, I lose balance and fall back on the bed.

"What the -"

He grabs my jaw, kissing me.

Holy fucking hell.

Stars explode in my brain.

He climbs on my lap, straddling me. His hands cup my face and I lace my fingers through his soft curls, tugging him closer until the space between us is non existent.

He tastes like cigarettes and mint gum and oh god, I don't know anything anymore. But I do know that I want to be here, with him, like this, for as long as I possibly can.

His tongue slides in and I moan. He moves over my crotch and it ignites a fire which trails all over my skin.

I'm clinging to him, wrapping my arms around his neck and running my hands through his hair and pulling him into me. He tastes so sweet. So hot and so sweet and I keep trying to say his name but I can't even find the time to breathe, much less to say a single word.

I shove him up, off me.

Our lips disconnect briefly and I pull his shirt off, my hands shaking. I barely have a second to push the fabric off his body before he pulls me into his lap. He wraps my legs around his waist, kissing me until time topples over and my head spins into oblivion.

It's a heavy, unbelievable kiss.

His hands are holding my cheeks, and he pulls back just to look me in the eyes and his chest is heaving. A wide smile is on my own face.

"I think," Nathan whispers, "my heart is going to explode."

I wish, more than ever, that I knew how to capture moments like these and revisit them forever. Because this? This is everything.

"Nice midnight surprise," I grin, kissing his chin.

I'm aware of his arousal pressing against my butt. I run my fingers across his eagle tattoo. His heartbeat is a crescendo against my wandering hands.

"I was thinking about you all through work. I almost showed up after my shift but then realised your father might be home and it wouldn't be pretty. So I had to sneak in," He laughs.

His smile makes my heart skip a beat.

"Wise thinking," I whisper, pulling him in for a kiss again.

I can't fucking believe I can do this anytime I want now.

The kiss is slow and gentle. My gut is swarming with butterflies. He pushes me back on the bed, his knee separating my legs, fingers laced in mine.

He kisses just under my chin, the tip of my nose, my forehead, my cheeks, all across my jawline. Then my neck, behind my ears, all the way down my throat and his hands slide down my body.

He pulls my shirt off, his hungry gaze not leaving my eyes. It turns me on more than I ever thought possible, his fingers leaving goosebumps in their wake.

His head dips down and I moan when his lips touch my v lines. It's just a whisper of a kiss but something collapses in my skull. It's a feather-light brush of his mouth against my skin in a place I didn't know existed to make me feel this good.

"Fuck Nathan," I groan. My body feels ten degrees hotter.

I gasp and jerk up when he palms me slowly over my boxers. He grabs my jaw and kisses me, forceful and demanding this time, continuing the languid assault on my crotch. I pull away, breathless and so hopelessly aroused, I'm about to faint.

"Fuck, fuck, Nathan, stop teasing!"

My own voice sounds foreign, I've never ever heard myself beg like this. He smirks ever so slightly, moving his hand. I frown at the loss of contact.

"What - ?!"

Next second he has pulled down my boxers and I let out a gasp of surprise as his slightly cold fingers touch my length.

I can barely recognise him, eyes hooded with lust. This is the same sunshine person, the same vulnerable boy who is apparently a total freak and I'm suddenly so embarrassed of myself.

"I'm..."

"Shh, it's okay Kai," he whispers, kissing the inside of my thigh. I shudder like a leaf in a storm.

This isn't some drunk activity. This is me, and the guy I hopelessly like, in my bedroom, about to do unspeakable things!!

"You're fine?" He asks.

I nod, too turned on to speak. His eyes darken even more. Then ... then he grabs me, jerking back and forth a few times. I huff in pleasure.

"You're so sexy, you know that?" He whispers, before moving his mouth closer to my nethers.

Fuck, this is really happening.

I moan when Nathan's hot lips lightly kiss the tip of my throbbing dick, before wrapping right around, slowly going down, lubricating it on the way. He goes all the way, then he pulls back, faster than what he went down, his tongue following.

A moan escapes me as I throw my head back, my hands clasping for Nathan's tousled hair, grabbing fistfuls and pulling at it.

He moans on me, the vibration running deep through my body. I'm close. I'm so close already. But I can't come yet, not so quickly. That's too embarrassing.

But I doubt I'll be able to help it with the way Nathan is constantly running his tongue up and down.

He looks up at me, his hazel eyes connecting with mine. I can't help but push his head further down, making him gag slightly, and making me moan.

His hands roam around the lower half of my body; up and down the front and back of my thighs, around my ass, back down and then he grabs my thighs.

My moans come more frequent, faster and short-breathed. I start to buck my hips in sync with his head bobs.

"N-Nathan. . I'm gonna..." I choke out through moans.

He thrusts his mouth over me a few more times before he pulls back, my dick slipping out of his mouth. He takes me in his hand, and begins jerking.

His other hand plays with my ass. Then he runs his finger slightly over my hole.

"Oh fuck me!" I yelp, bucking my hips up.

"Come for me Kai baby," he says lowly, lazily.

My body is shuddering with the thrusts of his hand. I barely have time to catch my breath, fast gasps escape my mouth.

"Oh fuck yes!"

My head falls back as I come undone, hitting my duvet, electricity coursing through every inch of me. I moan, loud enough that it echoes throughout the room, and no doubt audible from the hallway.

My eyes close as I ride out my high.

Oh my fucking hell and all the sins in this universe.

He gives me a deep open mouthed kiss, not giving me a second of peace. I'm still feeling the tremors in my knees as I kiss him back feverishly. I'm stark naked in front of this beautiful, shirtless boy and I don't know if I could get any luckier.

"Did you like that, Kai-Pie?" he whispers, making my hair stand on end.

I nod, not trusting myself to speak. That was mind-blowing, quite literally. Straddling me, he rocks his crotch against mine, making me yelp.

"Take - take those off," I grumble, sitting up, hooking my fingers in his jeans. He rises up, kneeling between my legs on the bed.

"I'm not shaved so..." he mutters softly, lifting my chin up.

"I don't care, I just want you," I whisper.

Slowly, I unbutton his denims, zipping it down, making my fingers brush against his bulge. He's already rock hard, I'm pretty sure it's gone painful now. He hisses when I plant a kiss on his happy trail, pulling down his clothes. His boner springs up, right in my face.

Fuck, he's bigger than I thought.

"Your turn," Nathan smiles devilishly.