57 - The End

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chapter fifty seven
florence thompson
song: i'll still have me - CYN

By the time that the sweet taxi driver had pulled up to my apartment complex, tears were still streaming down my face. He had asked me if I was alright but I couldn't find it in me to voice anything, so instead I settled for a quick nod.

He wished me well before taking off, leaving me to pack my things in a hurry.

As soon as I stepped foot into my bedroom, memories of yesterday came to mind. The thought of Vincent De Bellis standing in my bedroom, judging everything with his calculated gaze, came to mind and it hurt about as much as it had when I left him not too long ago.

I flung open my closet and ripped my suitcase out, throwing it onto the floor. I immediately started pulling shirts off their hangers, not bothering to look at them before throwing them into my open suitcase. I couldn't honestly care less what I was to take with me, since I knew full well that I was more than likely going to laze around my mothers home in sweats, as much as I'd like to be the heartbroken girl who goes out and forgets everything.

I did he same with my everything else, just flinging it all into my suitcase before zipping it up and looking around my apartment one last time, tears in my eyes.

I wasn't leaving for good, I would be back eventually but I just didn't know when. Maybe when the thought of Vincent wasn't so front and center, making my heart ache. I just needed to flee from this town, this state, that surrounded me with things that reminded me of him.

With one last look, I grabbed my suitcase and headed out of the door. I assured to lock it behind me before turning around and descending the stairs.

I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, my heart in my throat as I lugged my suitcase down the stairs. I was in my own little world, a world of pain and hurt, and too busy to even notice the familiar red convertible pulling into the parking lot.

When I did finally look up, I immediately locked eyes with a disheveled Vincent.

My heart dropped dramatically, making me feel sick to my stomach. So many different emotions ran through me in that moment, not many of them pleasant. I couldn't believe my eyes, if we're going to be honest.

Vincent parked his car haphazardly, jumping out in his very casual wear, just a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, his hair disheveled, he looked like he just woke up but I knew from how long of a drive it was, that definitely wasn't the case.

I swallowed every emotion I felt, pushing my feet to move faster towards my own car. The very last thing I wanted to do right now was be confronted with Vincent De Bellis. That was the entire reason as to why I left the note, because I couldn't physically tell him that I was leaving.

"Florence!" He called out, his voice ragged, as I neared my car, ripping the back door open and throwing my suitcase inside. I couldn't slow down, I needed out. I needed to get as far away from him as possible because I know if he simply speaks the right way, I'll fall at his feet.

"Florence!" He called again, this time much closer and just as my hand fell on the handle to my door, I felt him grip my arm and turn me around.

I knew I looked like hell, my nose red and puffy and tear stains down my face, surely. His gaze fell over my exhausted expression, eyes darting around my face.

After a prolonged silence of him just staring at me, seemingly stuck, I spoke up.

"What?" I muttered, tears burning in the back of my eyes.

"Florence, don't leave," He breathed, his eyes gentle as they glanced over my face. I knew this was it, this was exactly why I'd left him a note and decided to not tell him face to face. I knew he was too smooth, and I'm too willing to fall right back at his feet, just waiting for him to make the wrong move and step on me.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, wiping away an escaped tear that was trailing down my face, looking up at his mismatched eyes.

"To get you, to tell you not to leave," he admitted, stepping back from me and dropping his hand from my arm, putting a little bit of space between the two of us that was definitely welcome.

"Why, Vincent?" I asked, part of me hoping maybe he would give me an answer worth staying. Maybe he would tell me he loved me too, or that he couldn't stand the idea of life without me, but I knew it wasn't the answer I'd receive.

I knew as I started into his blue and brown eyes that searched my face relentlessly, that he didn't love me.

"Well, because...I don't know," he explained exasperatedly, running a hand through his waywardly hair. "I'll try! Is that what you want to hear? Will you stay if I try?" He asked, eyes brightening slightly at this new idea of his, his demeanor peaking slightly.

"Try what?" I asked, furrowing my brows as I stared at him.

"Commitment, that's what you want right?" He asked, his tone almost distant, he was grasping at straws.

I smiled sadly, shaking my head at him, tears brimming in my eyes.

He didn't want me to stay so we could be together. He wanted me to stay so I can continue to be in his life without the strings. He wanted me to stay off to the side while he continued with his lifestyle that he had before me, he didn't want commitment, and if he did it surely wasn't with me.

I knew well enough to know that this was his way of getting me to stay. He wanted me but didn't want me.

I hesitantly stepped forward, towards him and cupped his face, leaning up onto my tippy toes and pressing my lips to his. I relished in the feeling, tears rolling slowly down my cheeks. This kiss wasn't feverish like our others, this was soft and gentle, it was a goodbye.

I pulled back after a moment, releasing a sad sigh.

"I love you, Vincent De Bellis." I smiled sadly up at him with a teary gaze. His expression was hardened and confused, his dark brows pinched together and his familiar gaze was nothing short of hurt. "But for the first time when it comes to you, I'm choosing me."

He watched me wordlessly as I stepped back and pulled my door open, glancing at him silently before sliding into my seat and slamming the door. I knew his gaze was locked on me, I could feel it, but I couldn't bring myself to look at him as I turned the key and listened to the car come to life.

I shifted my car into gear and at the last second, I glanced over to him. He was stood in his casual clothing, his hair still just as messy, if not messier, than when he'd arrived. His gaze was worn and tired.

I locked that image of Vincent De Bellis in my mind in hopes to keep it forever.

With one last parting glance, I pressed my foot onto the gas pedal and turned my gaze back to the pavement ahead of my car, my heart crawling up and finding a home in my throat. As I peeled out of the parking lot, watching Vincent get smaller in my rearview mirror, I felt the weirdest mixture of bravery and heartbreak I'd ever felt and probably would ever feel in my life.

On that ride as I listened to the music from the radio, I opened myself up for the pain to come in, inviting it wholeheartedly because I knew in order for it to heal, I would have to let it hurt first. Every kiss and every touch, every smile and every grin, I let it hurt. I sat in the hurt and ache, and kept reminding myself that I would rise again.

The sun will still shine, and the birds will still chirp.

And I will not stop listening.

Falling in love with Vincent Alexander was one of the biggest pleasures of my life, one that I will cherish forever in years to come. One that I will remember so fondly.

He was the fairytale prince that every girl wants, but he was just meant for someone else.

Just as I was.

β€’ β€’ β€’

q: how did you like the book?? 😬
(pls don't hate me)

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