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Copyright © MonMoncheese
All Rights Reserved
74 Published 07.20.2020

•••

Listen to sad songs while reading this, I recommend it. My heart was crying.

•••••

JAMES

From the moment I woke up there has been one single thing on my mind.

Her.

My Rose.

She seemed to have taken over my thoughts, reminding me of what would soon happen.

Even last night, I could only stare into the darkness of my room, thinking of ways to explain the truth to Rose without ruining what we have.

I didn't want to ruin whatever it is we have.

Those feelings, those emotions I feel for her, because of her. I didn't want to ruin it.

But it was too late.

Perhaps, there was nothing else I could do, except tell her the truth.

And the fear, the fear that flowed through my veins. The fear of losing her has taken over my body.

Taking a sip of my orange juice, I place the glass down. Glaring at the table in front of me as if it were at fault for my mistakes.

It was the only thing I could do.

Taking the last bite of my breakfast, I put the fork down and pick up my plate from the table. The TV was on, the news anchor talking about the weather forecast for today. It seemed that the sky was in the same mood as me. The day was sunny, but there was 60% chance of rain later in the night.

Walking inside the kitchen, I place my dishes in the wide sink. Opening the faucet, I reach forward for the scrub, but aunt Evelyn stops me before I even have the change to grab it.

"James, leave that there," She takes the dirty plate from my hand and I stand there, my hand still in the air. "I will wash the dishes. You hurry up and head to school. Hurry." Ushering me aside, I bring my hand down to my side and give her a quick glance.

"Thank you, aunt." I mumble absentmindedly, my head in another place.

Leaving the kitchen, I walk past the dining table and lean down in front of the couch to pick up my bag from the floor. Swinging it over my shoulder, the bag slams into my back, hitting me softly.

I stretch my my arm to pick up my phone from the armrest and shove it inside the pocket of my trousers. From the other side of the couch, I feel Nico staring at me, but I don't say anything.

The rest of the guys had left earlier today, leaving Nico and I to ourselves. Stopping before the small book shelve, I pick up the keys from the top and throw them to Nico, who catches them with ease.

I had too much on my mind to even focus on driving. So, it's better for him to drive us today.

Nico doesn't say anything as he swings the keys around his finger and I pull the door open, revealing warm rays of the blinding sun as they come in contact with my face.

Holding the strap of my bag I'm about to take a foot outside the door, but the hand on my shoulder stops me.

Glancing to my side, I wait for the boy behind me to say something. He's quiet for a few seconds, almost is if searching for the right words and I stand there, letting him take his time.

Eventually, he sighs and squeezes my shoulder. "Adri, are you okay?" At his words, I catch the way they stare at me in worry, and I simply part my lips before pulling them into a small smile.

"I'm okay." I say quietly, my voice with no emotion. With that I walk out the door.

•••

I'm not okay.

I'm fucking afraid of losing Rose.

The first half of the school was finally over, but school did nothing to distract me from her.

It felt like a punishment. Knowing that I was about to lose one of the most important things in my life.

Two hours ago, I had sent her a message, asking her to meet me at Elven park and she agreed.

Somehow, I thought that I would be able to think thoroughly what I would tell her, but the time was getting closer and I still had no idea what to say.

It was an agonizing pain, knowing that this could be the end of us. But in the end, it was all my fault. I should have told her the truth the moment I found out who she truly is. But I was an idiot, and I chose to stay quiet like the fool I am.

Early in the morning, after I walked out the door leaving Nico behind, he didn't say anything else. But I could feel the glances every now and then during the car ride. He wanted to say something, but he chose to stay quiet this time.

The rest of the lads noticed that something is wrong. During our lunch period, I barely joined the conversations, my food remained untouched, and in the end, Alec ended up eating it. But Nate knew the truth, he knows the reason behind my agony.

And even he, couldn't do anything. This is something I have to by myself.

Spinning the pen with my fingers, I press the side of my face against my palm and dart my eyes to the board in front of me.

I could see the teacher explain the problem on the board, but my focus was somewhere else.

What was I going to do if Rose didn't forgive me?

•••

Parking the car, I turn it off and lean back against the chair. Bringing a hand to my temple, I massage it.

I didn't want to do this.

But it was the right thing to do.

It's for the best.

Letting out a breath, I bring my hand to the side and pick up my phone from the cup holder. Shoving it inside my pocket, I unlock the door and get out.

It's time.

Pressing my feet on the ground beneath me, I let out a shaky breath.

My heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest any second. With a shaky hand, I slam the door shut.

Looking around the park, I take notice of the lack of people. Barely any cars were here, most likely due to the sudden darkness in the sky.

Clenching my fists, I begin to walk straight to the playground ahead of me. That's where I told her to wait for me.

Passing by a giant tree, I crane my neck and look for her. When I don't see here, I continue walking and my eyes come in contact with a girl sitting down on a bench a few feet away from me.

That's her.

She's in her uniform this time, just like the first time we met here.

Would this be the last time?

The last time I would see her.

Swallowing my fear, I stop and stand there. Simply staring at her from my spot. I'm not sure what would happen, but I wanted to remember her no matter what. So I stay still, simply memorizing everything about her.

Her hair is braided into two French braids, leaving the side of her face bare. Her head is down, and I already she's fidgeting with her hands while she waits for me.

Roseanne.

My princess, my Rose... my stranger.

With my eyes fixed on her, I take a deep breath.

Taking a step forward, I begin to walk to the bench she's sitting on. At the sound of my footsteps she turns her head to the side. The moment her eyes come in contact with mine, she stands up from the bench, a smile growing on her lips.

But this time, my heart doesn't race in happiness, instead, it aches.

It knows what's going to happen.

"James!" She exclaims and I come to a stop.

I'm in front of her.

Waiting.

Waiting for those eyes to look at me with hate.

"Princess," My voice is barely a whisper as I reach forward to cup her cheek.

"Hi," She gleams at me. Her brown eyes staring at me with something, something that I can't explain.

"Hi, baby." I breath out, caressing her warm cheek with the pad of my thumb. My heart feels like it's ran a marathon despite my practice from earlier. "I missed you."

Upon uttering those words, Rose takes me by surprise as she wraps her around my chest.

"Me too." She answers, her voice muffled because of my shirt. But this action only hurts me more. Slowly I bring a trembling hand around her waist.

"Rose," A shaky breath escapes my lips, feeling a moisture in my eyes appear.

Rose pulls away quickly, her eyes darting to mine and I take in a breath as I gaze into those pools of a never ending brown as they slowly twinkle.

Bloody hell.

Those damn eyes.

I'm guilty of falling for those eyes.

"James, what's wrong?" Her voice is filled with worry as she raises her hand to wipe a lone tear that managed to escape my eyes.

Blinking my tears away, I look down at her. There is a pout on her lips while she tries to figure out the cause behind my tears.

If only she knew.

"I..." I start, my voice wavering slightly, my heart was clenching in pain and I clear my throat. "Rose, I- oh, damn it." I pull her body into my hold. Feeling her warmth mix with mine.

I enjoy the feel of her touch as more tears begin to trail down my eyes.

Would I get to feel her this close to me after she knows the truth?

We stay like that for a while. Rose in my arms as I slowly feel my pain become an agony. Closing my eyes, I bring my chin down to her head. Holding her close to me.

Despite my tight grip on her she manages to pull an arm from my gasp and brings it to my back, rubbing it slowly.

Oh, baby.

After a while, I pull away from our hold.

Bringing my eyes down to her hers, I take a hold of her hand and squeeze it before letting go.

I could feel my hands tremble and I clench them into fist. "Rose, I need to tell you something." I start.

"What's wrong?" She asks me. Her brows coming together in confusion.

"You are going to hate me for this, but I didn't mean to hide the truth from you for so long." Listening to my words, Rose opens her mouth to speak, but nothing comes out.

Clenching my jaw, I look straight into her eyes and my lips utter the words that I've been hiding for so long.

"I knew who you were even before I met you."

My heart falls at the sound of my words. There is no going back now. She heard me.

"What do you mean?" She questions and I close my eyes for a brief second.

She's making this so much harder for me.

How can I look into those orbs and watch as the twinkle in them dies down because of me?

"I know who you are, Rose." I tell her, emphasizing one word.

Rose stays quiet, her eyes focused on me as she takes a second to process my words. But the moment I see her eyes widen, my heart breaks slowly.

Rejection.

That is how it felt.

"You," Her voice cracks and my breath hitches. "You- you knew who I was even before we met at the park?" Rose stares at with pleading eyes, pleading me to prove her wrong.

She wished it was a lie, but it was the truth.

"Yes." My voice is barely above a whisper. "But Rose," I lean forward to reach for her hand, but she places a hand in front of me. I look down and stare at her hand with hurt.

"No." She shakes her head. "You, stay there."

Swallowed by the pain, I obey, afraid to hurt her more than I already did.

Rose stands there, trying to comprehend everything. Her eyes stare at the ground while she shakes her head.

"When?" She asks and I already know what she means.

Looking away from her, I focus on the playground behind her.

"The day we were talking on the phone, the day you tried to end our friendship," I swallow the lump in my throat as I remember that day. "I knew before then." I whisper.

Taking a deep breath, I finally bring my eyes to the ones full of pain. "A few days before that phone call, I was in my lunch period with some of my mates. And-" I close my when I get to the next part. "And I heard Ethan," Rose takes a deep breath, but I continue. I cannot stop now. "-ask Nathan about his sister." The moment she hears her brother's name her breath hitches.

I'm so, sorry, princess.

Shifting between my feet, I continue.

"Then Bryson pitched in and mentioned your name. I was confused, but so many things made sense. That's when I realized the truth. All this time, you were Nathaniel's little sister, the one that moved schools. You were my stranger. All this time you were so close to me and I didn't know anything."

"But Rose," I bite my lip as I prepare for my next words. "That's not all. Nathan told me the truth."

"What truth?" Her eyes go hard, and her soft voice becomes like ice.

I'm hesitant to answer, afraid of her reaction. This was a sensitive topic for her and I fear of the damage it would cause.

"What truth?" She asks again, her voice sharper this time, making me flinch in the process.

"That they bully you."

Hearing my words, a look of pain flashes through her eyes and Rose shakes her head, slapping a hand to her mouth as she tries to muffle her sobs. I can see the tears brim in her slowly before rolling down her cheek.

I hurt her.

I did this.

Rose avoids my gaze, looking everywhere but me. Removing the hand covering her mouth, she brings a hand to her head and holds it.

"I- I have to go." She suddenly says, her voice scratchy.

"Rose." I lean forward but she stops me.

"No, James, don't." I can hear the pain in her voice as she tells me that.

"Princess," I mumble, and her eyes raise to mine. The redness in them making me walk closer to her. I reach forward to wipe her tears but a sob rakes through her chest and she turns around, running away.

Leaving me alone.

"Baby." I whisper, my hand hanging in the air. The wind carrying away my words as my sorrow grows bigger.

The look in her eyes, the way she covered her mouth to prevent any sound from escaping. The way she tried to blink away her tears, but they betrayed her and escaped her eyes. I caused all of that.

Bringing a hand to my chest, I close my eyes, letting go of the tears that threatened to fall.

She's gone.

It's over.

○○○

DOUBLE FREAKING UPDATE.

WOW. I FEEL GREAT! ☺☺

It's been so long since I have update two days in a row. Aaaah, it feels good. I am proud. *jumps from excitement*😝

Sooo, tell me, how do you feel?

ARE YOU HURT? 🥺

ARE YOU SAD?

TELL ME?

I'M CURIOUS.

I have to be honest, while writing this chapter I got the chills because wow, my heart was sad.

LIKE, ROSE AND JAMES. MY BABIES. THEY ARE IN PAIN. NOOOOOOO.😭😭😭😭

But do tell me how you feel, my loves.

DON'T CRY.

If you are sad because of this chapter, then let me stretch my arms really wide and give you a big hug with love from me. 💕💕💖

I looooove you all, my cuties.







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